


Once upon a moon

by Night_Bloom



Series: Once Upon a Moon [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alpha Clarke Griffin, Alpha Lexa, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Angst with a Happy Ending, Coalition, Death, Dimension Cannon, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Minor Character Death, Soulmates Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Torture, True Mates, Violence, War, Wolf Pack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-08-18 03:58:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 114,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8148425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Night_Bloom/pseuds/Night_Bloom
Summary: Where Lexa is the commander of the grounders - but they have a secret, some of them are werewolves and when a chance meeting and indescribable pull leads to Lexa and Clarkes lives becoming intertwined and connected everything will change for the sky girl. (Lexa accidently turns Clarke into a werewolf - love story)





	1. A chance meeting?

Clarke always loved to go hunting by herself; she loved the game, the dance of the hunt. Finding her prey and stalking it until the perfect moment when she’d pounce. It helped her clear her head and get away from her responsibilities more than painting did because she was literally able to run away from them for a while when hunting. She liked to look for paint supplies while she was out hunting too, finding new plants that she could get the colour properties of, or restocking her supplies. Clarke uses a bow when hunting rather than the guns most others in her camp used; using a gun destroyed the peaceful silence of the hunt, and it tended to scare the animals away from the area for a while; it also could lead to a slow and painful death for the animal if the marksman was inexperienced. This is why Clarke always carried a dagger with her, in case she didn’t make a clean kill so that she could put the animals out of their misery; she would say a prayer of sorts when she did this, “Thank you for your sacrifice, your fight is now over, safe passage on your final journey home.”

It was just before dawn as Clarke looked at the expense of forest that surrounded the clearing where her camp was based and decided that she’d go to a place not frequented by her people, an area with a small lake to the east of her usual hunting spot. But first, she had to get out of camp without being noticed so that she could enjoy the silence and tranquility of the hunt she so enjoyed. She contemplated going to go on foot so she could get out of camp before people began to wake, but then decided against it and to risk the odd earlier riser and get her horse in case she made a large kill because she wouldn't be able to carry it back herself.

She left her bow and supplies at the edge of the woods so that she could collect them on her way out so if anyone did spot her they’d think she was just exercising her horse; she put her hood up and skulked in the shadows over to the stables where her horse was tied. She began to stride to the edge of the camp with her horse in tow, trying to get out without being seen. They made it to the edge of the woods where she’d left her gear without being detected; but once Clarke began to clamber into her saddle she heard a laugh from behind her, without turning around she knew it was Raven, “Where are you sneaking off to then?” she asked, in a light tone, she already knew the answer, she'd seen the arrows on Clarke's back and the bow attached to the saddle of her horse, without turning to Raven Clarke answered “I’m going hunting for awhile, I need a break from everything.” Clarke was waited for Raven to say something before she finished climbing up onto the horse, but when Raven said nothing Clarke hopped up into the saddle effortlessly and stared at the vast expanse of the forest before her. Raven looked from Clarke to the forest and back a couple of times before saying, “I never saw you. I have no idea where you are.” At Raven’s words Clarke’s face splits into a smile that touches her eyes, she looks down at her friend and thanks her, Raven replies with a smile of her own, “I have no idea what you’re talking about...Though if I did, I would remind you to be back before dark, otherwise your mother might lose her shit.” before Clarke can reply Raven has already walked away. Clarke looks to the forest and sets off east towards her lake.

Clarke arrives at her favourite hunting spot - the one in the middle of the forest with a slight clearing with a small lake - just before mid-day as the sun is still climbing to its peak when she ties her horse to a tree, grabs her bow from the saddle, and moves towards the lake to get a drink. Clarke kneels at the edge of the bank and places her bow and arrows beside her. She cups some water in her hands before splashing it on her face to refresh herself, then once more cupping water in her hands, though this time drinking it. As Clarke's knees, at the water's edge, she hears movement around her. She stills and listens. Silence. Then the snapping of twigs on the forest floor. Clarke checks the wind direction before she grabs her bow and arrows from beside her and stands, running upwind of the noise she heard while exiting the clearing so that she isn’t clearly visible. Once in the cover of the trees Clarke stills and watches the area around her. She sees movement across the clearing to her left. She moves silently, while remaining upwind of the animal so that it wouldn’t catch her scent, she moves to a high vantage point so that she’ll have a clean shot of the animal when it wanders into the clearing below.

She sees a head of a deer poke out into the clearing and sniff to see if there were any predators lurking about, Clarke holds her breath, though she knows that she’s upwind of the creature and it won’t sense her, it is still a part of the game. She sees that the deer has noticed her horse tied at the edge of the clearing, and has decided that it is safe to exit the cover of the forest. Clarke silently slips an arrow out of her sheath and places it on her bow, she pulls back the string, the head of the arrow tracking the deer as it slowly creeps out of the forest. The deer stops once it’s cleared the forest boundary and perks its ears up. Clarke thinks that the animal hear her and readies herself to take the shot, but the deer turns it’s neck to where it just was and makes a small noise, just then a much smaller deer appears at the edge of the clearing, hesitant to leave the safety of the trees. The larger deer, presumably the smaller one's mother, makes another small noise, encouraging the baby to come to her. The baby finally takes a step out of the safety of the trees, and then gallops over to its mother, nudging her side and trying to hide under her. As they move to the lake, Clarke continues to track them with her arrow. When they stop to take a drink Clarke lines up her shot, clears out the noise of the birds and focuses on her breathing; in...Out...in… No, she can’t shoot the mother deer. She can’t leave that poor defenseless baby without its mother. She lets her arm fall forward while still gripping the string and bud of the arrow and releases the tension in the string without firing. She curses herself, but she can’t do it. She knows what it is like to lose a parent, one that is to teach you all they know, one that loves you; she can’t do that to another creature.

She sits at her vantage point for a while and watches them. The mother is sitting in the sun watching her child play and chase a butterfly. The sun has begun to sink lower in the sky, Clarke is content to sit there and watch them, but she can’t come back from the hunt empty handed and it is beginning to get late, perhaps she’ll catch a rabbit before she goes back. Just as she’s about to return to her horse and disturb the peace of the deer's, she hears a low growl beside her. She turns her head to see a dark brown wolf, almost black, with bright piercing forest green eyes, with an almost luminescent grass green ring around the pupil. The wolf looks at Clarke for a moment, and Clarke reaches for her dagger that sits at her belt, prepared to fight if the wolf lunged at her. But to her surprise the wolf instead ran down the hill at full speed, beautifully and gracefully avoiding the trees, remaining almost silent but for the fall of its feet crunching twigs as it descended to the clearing below.

Clarke now realized why the wolf didn’t attack her, it was going for the mother deer and her baby. Clarke couldn’t allow the wolf to kill them, she grabbed her bow and pulled the string taut, just as the wolf cleared the trees and begins stalking towards the trapped deer. Clarke tracks that wolf and aims just the left of its head, she breathes and releases her arrow. It meets its mark. The wolf looks at the arrow, then turns to Clarke; it looks as though the wolf is smiling; daring Clarke to shot it. Clarke doesn’t want to, but she won’t let the deer die. The wolf turns its head back to face the frightened deer, and begins prancing towards them again, Clarke draws another arrow, silently begging the wolf to stop, when it doesn’t she draws the string of her bow and the arrow back again. Breath in...Out...in...Out FIRE. She releases the arrow and feels it whip the side of her face as it flies free from the string, through the trees and towards the wolf. It hits the wolf in the front right leg, and it howls in pain, collapsing from the weight that is on the now injured leg. The deer are startled out of their frightened trance by the wolf outcry, running to the safety of the trees behind them and disappearing into the foliage.

Clarke noticed that she is breathing heavily from the ordeal, and endeavors to even out her breathing as she descends the hill to the clearing. She watches the wolf for a moment, watching it to see if it was going to attack, but it hasn’t seemed to notice her. Clarke creeps around the edge of the clearing until she reaches her horse, glad that she tied her away from the commotion that just occurred. She places her bow and arrows across the saddle and grabs a handful of herbs out of the actual - she can’t just leave the wolf there in pain, but she knows that if she tried to get close the wolf will attack her. The wolf was lying down trying to get the arrow out of its leg; Clarke approached the wolf in a wide berth, rounding it to see its injured leg. The wolf’s head shoots up, piercing Clarke with a death stare with its forest green vibrant eyes and growls at her, looking both furious and afraid. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to hurt you. I did try to warn you not to go after them, but you didn’t listen. I didn’t want them to be separated. I’m sorry that I had to hurt you. Please, let me pull the arrow out and clean the wound.” Clarke stated while looking down at the wolf. The wolf was still growling, however, less violently now. Clarke still didn’t want to get close enough for the wolf to get a hold of her, she crouched down so that she wasn’t making a dominant gesture and this would make her less likely to anger the wolf.

It’s almost completely stopped growling at Clarke now, so she begins creeping towards it, prepared to shoot up to her full height and run at a moment's notice in case the wolf decides to attack. Clarke stops just out of the wolves reach. The wolves breathing is labored and has slowed, it has now completely collapsed on the ground and is unmoving apart from its irregular breathing. “Fuck.” Clarke curses and moves even closer to the wolf, pausing to see if it was a ruse before continuing to go closer to the wolf. Once Clarke is at the wolves side she can see that the arrow went cleanly through and that the wolf has lost a fair amount of blood from the puncture. Clarke also notes that the wolf is shaking and appears to be sweating, _“Wolves can’t sweat, can they?”_ she thinks, but this is no time to think about wolf anatomy, she needs to get the arrow out, and disinfect the wound. Clarke looks to the wolves face when she grasps above the bottom of the arrowhead, looking for any sign that the wolf will miraculously wake up and attack, she sees none, the wolf appears to be asleep, with beads of sweat on its brow, its face has a human quality to it, Clarke is confused by the wolves features; studying them for a moment, she thinks she can see the wolves features morphing into that of a human's - but that’s not possible, Clarke concludes that it is the rush of adrenaline in her system from shooting and being this close to the wolf before remembering the task at hand. She tightens her grasp on the arrow; she puts all her weight into her hand and throws it down to the ground, pulling the arrow the rest of the way through the wolf’s leg. A blood curtailing howl comes from the wolf as Clarke holds the blood soaked arrow in her hand, she stumbles back at the sound, she falls to the grown, closes her eyes and throws her arms over her face - sure that the wolf is about to attack she hears the howl turn into a pained scream.

But it isn’t hers. When nothing happens Clarke opens her eyes and lowers her arms, before her where the wolf had just been lay a naked woman. Clarke’s convinced that she’s hallucinating, that or she’s dead, but as she looks at the woman she notices a wound on her right forearm - right where the wolves wound had been, her hair was also the colour the wolves coat had been; but what really convinced Clarke that the wolf and this girl were one and the same was when the stranger opened her eyes, and Clarke saw the same vibrant forest green that she’d seen on the wolf. The girl let out a whimper and then collapsed, beginning to convulse violently, a cold sweat breaking out over her exposed skin. She was having a seizure from a loss of blood and shock; Clarke rushed over to the girl to hold her still and stop her from doing any harm to herself. She cradled the girl's head between her hands while resting the girl's body across her own, stopping her from flailing her limbs as much as possible. When the girl final stopped seizing got out the herbs she’d grabbed earlier and placed them in her mouth under her tongue, once they were wet she put them on both the entry and exit holes of the girls wound, she then grabbed the edge of her t-shirt and ripped at the edge, getting a long piece of fabric to wrap the wound with. Satisfied that the girl wasn’t going to seizure again for now and that the herbs would prevent further bleeding and infection for the moment, Clarke got up and went to her horse to get the saddle blanket to cover the girl with.

Clarke looked to the sky and noted how low the sun had gotten on the horizon, she sighed knowing that she couldn’t leave the girl here alone to go back to camp to get help and that if she took the girl with her they wouldn’t get back to camp before nightfall. Clarke decided that she’d make shelter here, just inside the tree line, for the night. Clarke set to work making a shelter for herself and the unconscious girl for the night, making a simple by secure tent-like shelter, she then gathered supplied for a fire, making sure to stay within eyeshot in case the girl had another seizure. By the time she’d finished the sun was just beginning to sink below the horizon, she’d managed to lift the girl onto the back of her horse and led them over to where she’d set up the shelter. Laying the girl down inside the shelter by the fire before trying her horse to a nearby tree.

Clarke heard her stomach grumble, and noted that she hadn’t eaten today, she got up to get some bread that she’d packed out of the saddle bag she’d put just outside the shelter; she noticed movement to her left and grabbed her bow from where it lay at the entrance of the shelter, she quickly took aim and fired at where she’d noticed the moment. She heard a thud and a squeak before silence. She wondered to where she’d just fired her arrow, it took her a little longer to find it in the poor lighting, but when she did she found that she’d killed a rabbit.

She picked up the animal, wandering back to the shelter and preparing it to be cooked. She began cooking the rabbit, her stomach rumbling, as she smelled the meat cooking and heard the meat sizzling as the fire licked at it. She sat on the far side of the fire, facing the entrance of the shelter, as she was taking the rabbit off of the fire she heard movement from within the shelter, the girl was awake. Clarke didn’t look up from what she was doing and just called out into the darkness, “There’s some cooked rabbit here if you’d like some, there’s also some fresh water and bread over there.” she stated pointing with the tip of her knife to a tree stump that had the bread laying atop of it and water beside it. She then continued “I also left my jacket inside for you to wear if you’d like. But other than that I’m afraid I only have the saddle blanket for you to wear.” Clarke still hadn’t look up from where she was cutting the rabbit, so when she felt eyes on her she was shocked to see the girl standing on the opposite side of the fire wrapped in the blanket. Clarke was struck by how attractive she was, her bright eyes contrasting against her dark olive skin and dark brown hair, which fell down around her shoulders to the middle of her back in curls. Her high cheekbones accentuating her angular face, Clarke thought she looked like a goddess.

As the girl raised an eyebrow, Clarke realized she’d been staring and averted her gaze, noting that the stranger did not. The girl watched Clarke with an intense curiosity and perhaps a bit of a glare, becoming more rigid and on edge when Clarke was near or had her knife, so she placed it in its sheath and proceeded to extend her hand out to the girl, “You can keep hold of this if it will make you feel safer; I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m sorry.” The girl still didn’t speak but nodded her head slightly and took the blade from Clarke’s hand and placed it on the ground beside her. “Would you like some rabbit? It's quite juicy and tender.” Clarke looked back at the girl over the fire and saw that she was staring at her, her gaze curious and a little perplexed, but also softer than before; she gave a curt nod and Clarke’s mouth tugged at the edges into a small smile as she turned to get some rabbit for the girl. “I’m sorry it’s not much, I didn’t want to leave you in the shelter alone for longer than I had to.” Clarke said when handing the rabbit to the girl, “I’m Clarke by the way.”

She hadn’t expected a response but as she turned to return to her seat she heard the girl say, “Lexa. My name’s Lexa.” As Clarke looks on at the girl she now knows as Lexa, she realizes that she knows that name, this girl is the commander of the Grounders, Clarke also notices that she furrows her brow as though she doesn’t know why she’d tell the girl that shot her, her name; but she remains silent. After a moment Clarke speaks again, “Lexa.” she tests it on her tongue and likes the way it feels, “May I check your wound? It’s been a few hours and the herbs and bandage will need to be changed.” Lexa meets her eyes, there’s a bit of accusation in them and Clarke looks down in shame. “I’m so sorry I shot you, I think the water from the lake made me hallucinate because I saw a wolf, and then when I went to pull the arrow out of its leg there you were instead.” As Clarke rambled Lexa felt her own lips tug at the sides as she looked at the Blonde haired blue-eyed beauty. Clarke’s hair was brighter than the sun, drawing in the light and making it it’s own, her eyes - luminescent pools of electric blue, that glowed against the night and her tanned skin, Lexa thought that they could even be the eyes of a wolf with how they glowed.

When Clarke had finished Lexa simply said, “You weren't hallucinating, you did see a wolf.”

Clarke looked at her as though she were crazy. “How could I have seen a wolf? That makes no sense…”

“Yes it does, I’m a werewolf Clarke.” she clicks the ‘k’ and it makes Clarke shiver “Surely you heard the myths and legends of old about werewolves on the Ark?”

“I mean we did… But I just never thought… I never thought they were real, just fairy tales mothers told to keep their children entertained.”

“Well, we’re real. You can add that to what you’ve learned since being on the ground Clarke kom Skaikru.”

“I guess I should have known that werewolves could be real, the ground’s been nothing like we thought it was.”

She sighs, hoping that she was just knocked on the head and that this was all a vivid dream, sadly she fears that’s not the case. “You never answered my question, Commander.” Lexa visibly shivers at Clarke’s use of her title, Clarke just assumes it’s because she’s cold, so she rounds the fire and goes into the shelter grabbing the herbs needed to protect the wound and her jacket for Lexa.

“I’m sorry, what question was that?”

Lexa calls, Clarke laughs under her breath, “May I change the herbs on your wound?”

When Clarke reemerges she hands Lexa her jacket, Lexa looks up at her questionably so she says, “You shivered before, I assumed you were cold.”

“Oh, yeah. Thank you.” Lexa took the jacket, too embarrassed to say that she didn’t shiver because she was cold.

“You’re welcome. So will you let me change the herbs and bandage?” Clarke doesn’t wait for an answer before she crouches beside Lexa next to the arm that she shot with an arrow; however, she doesn’t move to touch Lexa until she gets the go ahead, looking into her eyes waiting for the go ahead. She can see a conflict going on in Lexa’s eyes, she wants to say no, this is the girl that shot her with an arrow after all, but she did it to save the deer and it wasn’t a fatal hit, in fact, she thinks she may have healed by now. She conceded and nods her head in agreement. Clarke carefully removes the bandage and herbs to reveal the wound below. Clarke gasps, _“Yep”_ Lexa thinks, _“It’s definitely healed.”_ Clarke can’t believe her eyes, where there was a hole in Lexa’s arm a few hours previous was now just a tiny scar, barely visible unless you knew it was there. “How… How did…”

“It’s a perk of being a werewolf, we heal fast. Though I think that your herbs helped speed up the process.” Lexa wondered why she was telling Clarke all of this - that she was a werewolf that they held more quickly than a human - she was an outsider, worse an outsider who'd shot her, but she just couldn’t help it. She had a suspicion that her wolf had something to do with it, but she didn’t understand why she would want Clarke to know these things. Clarke looked thoughtful for a second before throwing the ruined piece of cloth that had been on Lexa’s arm in the fire; it ignited into a ball of green fire that rivaled the colour of Lexa’s eyes. She then reached over and grabbed the small ‘container’ of water, ripping the same length of cloth from her shirt, but this time from the back to even them out, Lexa watched her the entire time. Clarke’s midriff was now completely exposed and Lexa couldn’t help but stare at the Blondes toned stomach, she also released that Clarke had ripped up her shirt to cover Lexa’s wound that would have held fast enough on its own and felt a pang of guilt; though just as quickly as it arrived she shook it off, she had nothing to feel guilty for, but she still did - she knew that the Sky People didn’t have much in the way of resources and the fact that Clarke would destroy (most likely her only shirt, and offer Lexa her jacket on this cold night) warmed the girl’s heart and sparked something within her. Clarke hadn’t noticed Lexa’s stares - or if she had didn’t comment - she was too concentrated on dipping the cloth into the water and then dabbing Lexa’s arm, cleaning away the dried blood and remnants of the herbs.

They sat in silence as Clarke took more time than needed to clean Lexa’s arm, Lexa knew the Blonde wanted to ask her something but waited until she spoke on her own - which didn’t take long. “You keep saying ‘we’, are all Grounders werewolves?”

Lexa had been anticipating the question and answered right away, “Some are, not all. But those that aren't are basically Omegas.”

“Omegas?” Clarke asks,

“Yes Omegas, they’re basically the weakest members in the pack and submit to the Alphas and Betas wills; however, as Commander, when hierarchy isn’t absolutely necessary - like in battle - I try to keep everyone respectful of one another, but hierarchy is unavoidable in any society - especially a wolf one.”

Clarke seems thoughtful for a second, “How many Alphas are there? If there is more how does that work?”

“Because we’re not actual wolves the same guidelines don’t apply to us - in the wild wolves are in family groups with the ‘Alphas’ being the bonded pair and the rest of the pack their offspring - with us our pack is our people and the hierarchy works a bit differently. In a werewolf pack, it has to do with the person as much as it does their wolf - “

“Their wolf?” Clarke interjects

“Yes, their wolf. A werewolf has two personalities per say, their human side and their wolf side. A person's dominance isn’t just because of their wolf - though that is a big part of it - it’s also about the person, just like in your society. You’re the leader of your people, and therefore the most powerful Alpha in your pack, but there are still other strong individuals, such as your mother and Kane who would also be considered Alphas, just not as strong.”

“Can you communicate with your wolf side?”

“Communicate… is the wrong word. When I am in this form I can feel her, her needs and wants and she can feel me. When I’m in my other form I’m still in control, but I’m more animalistic than I am in this form - unless I surrender some control to her - I act more on primal instinct when my wolf is in control rather than on thought and logic. But no I can never talk to her in English or Trigedasleng.” Clarke looks thoughtful again and doesn’t speak for a long moment. She gets up and walks back over to her seat on the other side of the fire, and Lexa is surprised that she feels a pang of sadness at the loss of contact with her. Clarke looks into the fire her brow furrowed in thought, and she finally says, “So when I fired my warning shot at you, you were in control - at least a bit - but chose to ignore me and continue for the deer.” It was a statement, not a question, and Lexa could feel how pissed the Blonde was, she appeared cold and distant now, lost to the night, even though she was just across the fire, shrouded in light. Lexa didn’t know how to respond to her accusation, but before she could the Blonde continued, “How long were you there watching them? Were you watching me?” her voice cracks as she voices the next part, “Were you going to hurt me?” Lexa’s wolf howls inside her and she breaks a little at the thought of hurting Clarke, at Clarke thinking she’d hurt her - where had these feelings come from? The two girls barely knew each other, of course, she wouldn't have known Lexa wouldn’t have hurt her, still, the accusation hurt her wolf and by default hurt her too.

She replied, “I would never hurt a person.” She wanted to continue and say _“Least of all you.”_ but she didn’t her wolf screamed at her to say it, but she remained silent.

“Then why did you turn to me when I fired the warning shot and smile?”

Clarke asked in a quiet voice, below that of a whisper while looking into the fire, more to herself than to Lexa. But due to werewolf hearing she heard her and replied, “I don’t know. Like I said my wolf is more in control than I am in that form. I took it as a challenge, and I didn't think you’d actually fire at me.”

“Oh, course you could fucken hear me. Another perk of being a werewolf I suppose.”

Lexa didn’t reply, she just sat there and took the Blondes anger. “You still haven't answered one of my questions,” Clarke stated.

“Which one was that?” Lexa asked, unsure if this is a good line of conversation to go down. Though she thought to hell with it, she couldn’t possibly make it any worse.

“How long were you watching the deer for, me for?”

Lexa exhaled a shaky breath; unsure of she should answer the Blonde truthfully or not. But her wolf indicated that she should answer truthfully, and so she did, “I was watching you since you arrived at the clearing. I often go hunting here because it’s out of the way and no one usually comes here, it also has a plentiful freshwater pound, which means there’s always game around.” Lexa paused before continuing, “As you arrived I had been drinking some water and ran into the trees to avoid detection, I had intended to leave - for you to never know I was here - but when I saw you my wolf told me to stay, so I did. She’d also sensed the deer and wanted to see what you’d do. When you took the high ground, upwind of the deer she was impressed with your skill, but even more so by how you handled your weapon, your skill - despite not firing impressed not only her but me also. When you didn’t fire when you saw the baby she was curious as to why. She waited for you to do something, but you just sat there and watched them, so we watched you too. My wolf was calm watching you, I don't know why.” Lexa seemed genuinely perplexed by her wolves reactions towards Clarke, but continued her story, “When you got up to leave, she wanted to see what you’d do when they were threatened. So she took control, growling to get your attention then went down after the deer. When you fired the warning shot we both thought you ballsy - hence the smile - but because you fired a warning shot neither of us thought you’d actually shoot us. Guess we were wrong.”

Lexa finished her story and Clarke just stared at her, unsure of what to say. She focused on the fire, not looking at Lexa, or even acknowledging that she was there, this made both Lexa and her wolf uneasy, her wolf crying to her to fix it, to reach out to Clarke. She broke the endless silence saying nothing but the Blondes name in an anguished tone, “Clarke” again clicking the ‘k’, Clarke looked up at her waiting for her to speak but Lexa didn’t know what to say, she just looked down, “I’m sorry.” was all she said, Clarke didn’t reply; she just got up and walked away. From the shelter, from the fire, from Lexa.

**//**

Clarke awoke the next morning to the sun bathed her body in light and warmth and to the loud sound of bird songs. She didn’t open her eyes, just relished the warmth on her exposed skin. At first, she was disoriented, unsure of where she was, but then the events of the previous day came back to her. Watching the deer, shooting a wolf that turned out to be the Grounder Commander Lexa, finding out that Lexa or her wolf had wanted her to shot them, then walking off to sleep next to the lake. In all honesty, Clarke knew that going off and sleeping in an exposed area that she was unfamiliar with was a bad idea, but she was just so mad last night that she had to get away from Lexa. She huffed, not wanting to think about it and ruin the good mood that the sun's rays had put her in; so she rolled over to where there was more heat, turning into a fluffy mass that hadn’t been there when she’d fallen asleep.

Clarke’s eyes shot open and she sprang herself away from the mass, moving as fast as she could crawl away from it. Clarke was so shocked but the unexpected presence behind her that she forgot that she’d slept next the edge of the lake, and in her rush to get away she sprang herself over the bank and into the fresh cool water below.

She re-emerged gasping for air because of the chilly temperature of the water and the shock of being in it. Looking to where she’d just been peacefully asleep she saw a deep brown almost black wolf with its head up, ears perked and seeming to be laughing at Clarke's current set of circumstances. Clarke was confused for a moment until she noticed the wolf’s eyes, that piercing vibrant forest green that she’d only ever seen once. The wolf was Lexa.

Clarke didn’t make a move to get out of the water despite the fact she was freezing. She looked at Lexa the wolf, studied her. Her coat seemed browner with the light illuminating it, and Clarke noticed a small patch of white fur where she’s sure she’d shot Lexa the previous day - _“Maybe it’s something to do with their healing process.”_ she thought - she continued to look over the wolf that lay leisurely in the sun before her. Lexa’s words from the previous night came back to her “I would never hurt a person.”  And as Clarke looked into the wolf's eyes, she knew that to be true. The wolf was still laughing at her, and Clarke shot her a glare indicating that she should knock it off before gripping the bank and pulled herself up and out of the water, more gracefully than she thought possible. Lexa slightly snickered to herself, stopping when she saw Clarke standing with the sun behind her in soaked skin tight clothing, Lexa gulped and her wolf whined a little. Clarke noticed the noise Lexa made and looked down at her body, noticing her soaked clothing, staring at her clothes, they would take the entire day to dry if she left them on, even sitting in the sun or by the fire - which would have died out by now. She sighed and began to strip out of her clothes, pulling off her shirt first then her pants, she walked over to a nearby tree and slung them over a low hanging branch, “This should help them dry faster” she thought. It wasn’t until she heard make a slight low growl whipping noise that she remembered that she wasn't alone.

Clarke turned to Lexa who appeared to be looking anywhere by at her, Lexa was silently scolding her wolf for A) making those noises and grabbing Clarke’s attention, and B) being attracted to Clarke. She had to admit that Clarke was hot, especially wearing very little clothing, but she wasn’t a wolf or even Grounder - which meant that her wolf had controlled her horny ass.

Clarke began laughing at Lexa, her obvious attempts to not look at Clark were hilarious, considerably more so because she was in wolf form. This brought Lexa’s attention back to the Blonde, Lexa just watched the half naked girl laugh in the sun that engulfed her, she tilted her head to one side and perked her ears up as she let the sweet carefree sound of Clarke’s laugh wash over her, closing her eyes so that she could focus on only that. Her wolf began to purr, taking complete enjoyment in the sound. Lexa noticed that Clarke had stopped laughing and she opened her eyes, the Blonde had moved so that she was standing directly in front of Lexa and had bent down so that they were eye level with one another, Clarke looked at her as though she were searching for something. Lexa heard Clarke’s quick intake of breath when Lexa opened her eyes; her pupils were dilated to the point where they were almost completely obscured her irises. They locked eyes for a moment before Clarke turned her face away, her cheeks turning red. When she looked back up at Lexa she seemed determined, she looked into Lexa’s eyes again then spoke, “Did you sleep with me last night?” It was Lexa’s turn to look down, had she been in human form she would be blushing now.

 

Clarke took her turning her face away as a confirmation of what she already knew, “I’ll take that as a yes then. Why did you? If you hadn’t noticed I was sleeping out here to be away from you.”

 

Her words stung both Lexa and her wolf, she visibly flinched away at them and her face falling, Clarke notices, and softens her own expression, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be so harsh. What I meant to say was that I’d been mad at you, and I’d left to get some space.”

 

Her words, though softened, still hurt and Lexa’s wolf whimpered encouraging Lexa to nudge her head against Clarke’s hand, the universal symbol of asking someone for a pat. Clarke obliged, seeming to be somewhere far away, “Thank you though. I’m pretty sure I would have frozen without you sleeping next to me. Even now actually.” Lexa hadn’t realised but she’d scooted closer to Clarke and wrapped her body and tail around the girl, engulfing her in fur; she’d also began purring again from Clarke scratching her head. “When you turn back again you’re going to have to tell me how you purr because that’s not something wolves do as far as I know.” Lexa laughed. Because she was a werewolf the ‘normal’ limitations of wolves vocal skills didn’t completely apply to her - when she reacted vocally as a human would to something her wolf would make an equivalent sound as best it could, when her wolf purred she was moaning. Not that she planned on telling Clarke that any time soon.

 

They stayed there, bathing in the sun, Clarke slowly stroking the top of Lexa’s head and behind her ear for what felt like an eternity, but once it ended felt like only a split second in time. When Clarke removed her hand and made to move away Lexa’s wolf let out a low whimper of protest making Clarke laugh and stop her attempts to move away, placing her hand back on the wolves head. Lexa loved Clarke’s laugh, she could listen to it forever; but more so she loved the way the girl's eyes sparkled and seemed to smile when she laughed, she loved the little dimples in her cheeks and the little wrinkles that would appear around her eyes - Lexa loved everything about this girl that she’d known less than 24 hours, this girl that had shot her (though admittedly that was Lexa’s own fault - moreover that of her wolf), this girl that had cared for her, this girl that was neither wolf nor grounder. Lexa just loved this girl. And that fact frightened her more than forging the coalition of the 12 clans, the fact that she loved this outsider, who’s kind had killed so many of hers (and who’d personally killed many she’s sure).

 

Lexa had been so lost in her train of thought that she hadn’t noticed that Clarke had moved away from her. She was over checking on the drying progress of her cloths and rearranging them so that wet areas were moved into the sun in the place of dry ones. Once Clarke seemed satisfied with her maneuvering of her cloths she walked over to her saddlebag, removing an apple, Lexa thinks that she’d going to eat it (Lexa hopes that she’s going to eat it because she hasn’t eaten today and she gave most of her dinner last night to Lexa), when Clarke moves over to where her horse is tied and places the apple at the base of its mouth to eat Lexa lets slip a very primal warning growl. This startles both Clarke and her horse (even Lexa a little if she’s honest). Clarke looks back at her with a questioning look, and Lexa can see fragments of fear flittering in her sparkling blue gaze and turns away, facing the water of the lake with her back to Clarke, unable to meet her frightened gaze knowing that she is responsible for it.

 

Her wolf ached not seeing Clarke, not knowing where she was and that she was safe, Lexa knew that this was irrational because she was right behind her where she’d been a moment ago and ignored her wolf; that is until her whines became so unbearable that Lexa turned her head slightly so that she could see Clarke in her preferable vision - catching Clarke staring at her then quickly looking away when she realised she’d been caught. Lexa wants to change back into her human form, to talk to Clarke… but she doesn’t, she remains unmoving and unchanged. She knows why, and she’s ashamed of her cowardice, she won't change because there's no way for Clarke to reject her words, to reject her, when she’s a wolf. Lexa is so in her head that she hasn’t noticed Clarke approaching her and jumps when she feels a hand between her shoulder blades.

 

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.” Clarke all but whispers, as though she’s afraid that anything above a whisper will send a startled Lexa off running. “I just wanted to check that you were ok. You seemed… distressed.”

 

Lexa turns to face Clarke and sees that she’s now fully clothed and her heart sinks, she realises that Clarke left off the _“Before I go.”_ to her _“just wanting to check on you.”_ Lexa will not allow herself to show weakness to anyone, not in this form or another; she feels her face drain of all emotion and her usual stoic _Heda_ mask fall into place, her emotions slipping into the back of her mind, closing off her heart to the world around her once more to prevent herself from feeling the aching pain it insists on instilling upon her. Clarke notices this change and becomes panicked.

 

She kneels in front of Lexa’s face, looking into her eyes, “Lexa? LEXA!” She tries, but gets no response. She can no longer see the girl inside the wolf and becomes frightened _“What if the wolf took over” she thinks, “What happens to Lexa?”_ It is then that Clarke decides to do something potentially extremely risky. She stands and evaluates the way the wolf is sitting, how close she is to the ledge of the water, she looks down at her freshly dried clothes. _“Screw it”_ Clarke thinks as she runs at the wolf at full speed, wrapping her arms around its midsection as she comes into contact, dragging it into the chill water before them. As they make contact with the surface of the water Clarke hears a surprised whine that turns into a gasp before feeling a sharp pain in her head as she descends into the depths of the lake.

 

_Clarke’s eyes are closed, she feels a weird sensation, as if she were floating. She’s soaring through the trees while drifting on the wings of the wind, no she is the wind. Ruffling the leaves and making them flutter down to the earth, but just before they reach their destination of the ground she picks them up, wrapping them around herself, taking them with her until she’s no longer strong enough to pull their weight along with her own. She starts to slow. She’s no longer whooshing through the trees, at a freeing rate. She feels laggy and slow. She’s falling from the sky. Not like before. Not like when they came down in the shuttle. She’s free falling and there is nothing to stop her from smashing into the earth below. She’s falling and there’s nothing that can be done to save her. She is going to die. Just before hitting the ground she sees a set of haunting green eyes, and hears a voice that seems to be carried by her old self, by the wind; “Come back to me Clarke, Please” the voice sounds pained, alone and lost; much like how Clarke feels. “Please!” the voice begs, “I can’t lose you. I’ve only just found you.” Then Clarke hears the voice speak in a language she doesn’t understand, hearing the words as she slips away into darkness “your gonplei ste nou odon ai hodnes, beja come back.”_

 

Clarke’s eyes open suddenly as she sits up violently while coughing, spitting out water as she does. At first she can’t remember what happened, but then she feels a pain on her left temple, pressing her fingers to it, flinching as it stings, removing her fingers to find blood on them. She starts to freak out at the sight of her own blood, then she feels a strong hand on her upper arm and a soothing _“Shhh”_ , it isn’t until now that she notices the figure bathed in light at her side, a very naked figure.

 

“Shhh, Clarke it’s ok, YOU’RE ok.” Lexa says in a low whisper because she’s afraid her voice would break if she spoke any louder. “It’s ok. You’re safe” She spoke these words not only for Clarke's benefit but for her own as well, trying to slow her racing heart and calm her worried mind, _“Clarke’s ok, she’s going to be fine.”_ Lexa repeats this over and over in her head, waiting for it to sink in that she hadn’t lost her. Not yet any way.

 

“Lexa? Lexa, you’re naked!”

 

Lexa lets out a small laugh, grateful for the release of tension she feels from her shoulders, “Yes, that is something that happens when I transition forms.” she say with a smirk, while looking at the wide eyed girl, who’s forgotten her near death experience, and the blood that still drips from her head wound, all because of a naked girl.

 

Clarke looks straight into the deep green pools of Lexa’s eyes, getting lost in them. She can feel the kindness and worry that they hold and it takes her a moment to come back to reality, only doing so because she hears Lexa’s voice. “Mhhh I didn’t catch that.”

 

Lexa lets out a small laugh and with a smirk repeats her question, “I asked if you were alright, you kinda zoned out.”

 

“Oh, I think I’m a little concussed.” Lexa’s beautiful features are washed over with concern the instant the Blonde insinuated that she may be in danger, though Lexa doesn’t know what being _“concussed”_ means, she’s sure it’s nothing good with a head injury. She furrows her brow and in an instant makes a decision. Placing her arms under the Blonde's legs and back she swiftly lifts her off of the grass and stands carrying both of their weight effortlessly.

 

Clarke begins to protest and question Lexa, “Lexa? What are you doing? Ah, Lexa?”

 

Lexa says nothing, just looks down at the girl in her arms as she takes long strides across the grass towards where Clarke horse is tied. The look on her face is one of worry and something else Clarke cannot place, she’s about to question Lexa when she speaks, “Being, what was it? Concussed.” She pauses for a moment, waiting till Clarke nods indicating that it’s the right word, “That’s a very bad thing when one has a head injury?” Lexa asks, looking down at Clarke. She nods again, in return Lexa looks up and nods her own head.

 

She places Clarke down onto shaky legs once they are back at Clarke’s makeshift shelter from the pervious night. Once Lexa is sure Clarke can stand on her own (or at least with the help of a nearby tree) she begins grabbing the Blond's things and putting them on the horse, first the saddle, then the bags, slowly adding more weight in them before all of Clarke’s things are pack, her bow and arrows slung across the saddle. Lexa walks over to where she sat last night and picks up the dagger in its sheath and carefully hands it to Clarke, who places it on her belt, seeming more at ease with it there.

 

Lexa looks at Clarke and grabs her attention, their eyes connecting for a long moment before Lexa spoke, “I’m going to pick you up and place you on the horse. OK?” Clarke nods her head before offering her hand to Lexa, who takes it before turning the girl and picking her up by the waist, as though she weighed nothing as she placed her on the horse’s back in the saddle. Before Clarke can ask Lexa what’s going on she feels the shifting of weight in the saddle and feels like she’s going to slip off the horse's back, unable to do anything about it in her current hazy state, until she feels a pair of strong muscular arms wrapped tightly around her torso, while taking the reigns of the horse. Lexa placed her head on Clarke’s shoulder and said, “I’m taking you to a place where your wound can be tended to properly.” Clarke doesn’t know what to say so just nods. Lexa removes her head from Clarke's shoulder and flicks the reins, sending the horse into action.

 

As they ride Lexa can feel Clarke going slack against her and thinks that it mustn’t be good for her to sleep with a head injury so decides to get Clarke talking so she stays awake, “Clarke?”

 

“Mhhh”

 

“Clarke, wake up.” She says softly but also with an air of commandment so that the girl is forced to oblige.

 

“What?”

 

“Tell me, are you the healer for your people?”

 

“Healer? I suppose so, why?” Clarke’s head hurts and it feels fuzzy, it’s hard for her to concentrate.

 

“Your knowledge of herbs and your tentative nature when I was wounded made me wonder. Now I have a question about head injuries.”

 

Again Clarke only lets out a small “Mhhh” and Lexa has to add force to her question to make the girl hear her, “Clarke! Is it bad for someone with a head injury to go to sleep?”

 

“Mhhh, yep.” is all she says, and Lexa feels the panic rise in her again.

 

“Clarke, Clarke! You have to stay awake then ok? I need you to stay awake. beja gonplei klark”

 

Clarke lets out a small giggle, “What did you just say? I couldn’t understand.”

 

Lexa flicks the rings again, trying to get the horse to gain speed, they’re so close to her healers loggings, so close. “Clarke, I just need you to hold on a little longer ok? We’re almost there.” Lexa doesn’t hear a response and the body in front of her is becoming more and more slumped in the position Lexa’s body is keeping her in. Lexa feels a wet substance on her arm and looks around, seeing it’s Clarke’s blood, it’s socked a large portion of her hair, and is running down her face. Lexa’s panic rises with a furry and she flicks the reins over and over, willing the horse will all her might to go faster. As she nears the little house hidden in the rocks of the hill Lexa calls out, “NYKO! NYKO! I NEED YOU NOW!”

 

Hearing the screams of his Commander outside Nyko exits his home, “My Commander, what's wrong? ” He stops in his tracks when he sees his Commander gipping the lip body of a Skaikru member to her frame while on a horse.

 

“NYKO! Quick, come help me get her off of horse, she needs your help immediately.” Lexa states in an even and unrushed voice, her brain defaulting into _Heda_ mode at being faced with one of her people, though seemingly calm on the outside she was being crushed with fear for Clarke and her wolf was desperate to be near her, for her to be ok.

 

Lexa helps pull Clarke off the horse and into Nyko’s arms before jumping off herself and tying the horse to a nearby branch before racing after the healer into his home. “How long has she been unconscious?”

 

“About the last few minutes of the journey here, no more than five.” Lexa states matter of factly, and she can’t believe how calm she sounds right now.

 

“How long ago did she sustain the wound?” He asks, all his questions are making Lexa and her wolf angry, why isn’t he just fixing her?

  
She growls at him, “I don’t know. Just fix her!” It is the first instance where she shows any kind of emotion, and she instantly regrets lashing out at her subject, but his eyes just turn soft and look at her with kindness and understand. He nods then turns to Clarke assessing what needs to be done before running around his house grabbing various herbs, bowls of water, and cloths. While he grabs what he needs Lexa moves to Clarke’s side and grab her hand, feeling it in her own, feeling the way it fits perfectly. Lexa looks down at Clarkes expressionless and lifeless face, noting beads of sweat that have begun to form on her brow. Nyko returns and cleans the area of the wound, looking at how large and deep the wound is. He then hands Lexa a bowl with herbs in it and a small stone before telling her to grind the herbs together, forcing her to release her hold on the other girl's hand, doing so reluctantly. When she is done she hands the bowl back to Nyko, who then wipes the wound clean again before appling the herbs to Clarke's left temple. Lexa watches her, she's turned pale, sweat has broken out all over her body, her clothes are still wet from their dive into the water that caused all of this. And then Clarke begins shaking violently. Nyko turns her onto her side and instructs Lexa to hold her head firm until the convulsions cease. Nyko exits the room, returning with a bear skin that he places over Clarke to keep her warm and hopefully prevent another series of convulsions from occurring, a blanket that he places over the Commander's shoulders, and a set of cloths that he places in her hands -  making her realise that she was still naked. She pulls the blanket tighter around herself with one hand, while holding the cloths in the other. Looking up to Nyko with a grateful smile on her face before looking back at Clarke, saying a silent plea to herself, _“Heda, her my plea, let her be ok.”_ She repeats this over and over in her head as she silently sits at Clarke’s side, hand in hers, rubbing her thumb along the top of Clarke’s; willing that somehow Clarke will absorb her ability to heal.


	2. A change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys I just edited the end of this chapter a little - just wording and phrasing of a few things because I was dog tired when I finished and re-reading it was a little unhappy with how I'd worded a few things. But if you've already read it then there's no need to re-read because there are no major changes :) (to be honest if I read through the whole thing then I'd end up changing some things so I'm not going to do that haha)

Nyko clears his throat gaining Heda’s attention before motioning that they go outside. He’d left them alone since handing Lexa the clothes and putting the blanket over Clarke. Since then Lexa had changed and had just been sitting at Clarke’s side, watching the rise and fall of her chest, her breathing had levelled out and become less erratic ahs shallow, easing Lexa’s fear for Clarke’s life - if only a little. She stands, looking longingly at their entwined hands and glancing over Clarke’s peaceful face, the lines in her forehead smoothed, muscles relaxed she looks so small when asleep, so young, the weight of her people no longer on her shoulders for the briefest of moments. Lexa wonders for a fleeting moment if these is how she looks when enthralled in the depths of sleep, at rest without a care in the world; she doesn’t dwell on the thought, however, giving Clarke one more longing glance before exiting outside.

Lexa steps outside into the evening chill, the sun has almost set, clinging to the sky for as long as it can before sinking below the horizon for its rest. Nyko looks at her, unsure if he should speak first or not when Heda gives him a small nod he begins, “Heda, was it you that injured the girl? Was it your wolf?”

Lexa is a little taken back by the question, not having expected it, she nods then confirming vocally, “She is Clarke kom Skaikru, and yes. Why do you ask?”

“Heda, I think that she is in transition.” Lexa lets the news sink in. Clarke’s in transition, Clarke’s going to be a wolf… If she makes it. Lexa’s stomach drops at the last thought. Not everyone can be a wolf, it’s to do with a person's genetics - the same with being a night blood - it also has to do with the power of the person that bites or scratches them. To become a werewolf, you need to first have the dormant genetic mutation to be a wolf and then have an Alpha wolf bite or scratch you, this acts a mutagen or catalyst that activates the gene. If you don’t have the gene then you’re just left with a scratch or bite for a while, but if you do then it gets activated and you being the genetic transition into becoming a werewolf. However just because someone has the gene to be a werewolf doesn’t mean that they’ll survive the transition. It’s changing your genetic code, as well as your physiology along with a multitude of stuff that Lexa didn’t even know about, even with the wisdom of the previous Commanders. It’s why her people that aren’t born wolves (you can tell if a child is a wolf because of a luminescent ring around their pupil) are ‘tested’ by the Commander at a young age - that and to find night bloods - for some reason the younger you are when tested the more chance you have of survival. 

As Lexa’s thoughts run away from her, thinking of all the possible scenarios Nyko gets her attention, “Commander? Are you alright.” 

“Yes, fine.”

“Commander, what are you going to do if she makes it through the final stage of transition?” Lexa didn’t miss the if in his sentence, but she wasn’t going to allow herself to think about the possibility of Clarke not making it, she would, Clarke was strong. 

“Her heart shows no sign of weakness, I am confident that she will survive.” 

Nyko nods his head before asking another question that weighs on his mind, “If she makes it through the final transition she will need to be trained, Heda. We are taught young how to control our wolves, how to bond with them but she will not know how, her wolf will also frighten her, as well as her heightened sense. Heda, I don't know if she'll be able to go back to her people if they'll accept her or not." He pauses for a moment weary of what he must say next, "but Heda, I'm not sure our people will accept her either."

Lexa becomes enraged "They will accept it because she'll be under my protection. If they attack her then they attack me." she states so quietly that the danger in her voice is evident, she is willing to kill anyone that were to defy and attempt to harm Clarke.

Nyko nods, "As you command Heda." 

//

Clarke wakes with a start. Everything hurts, her eyes burn when she tries to open them - the light, as though she’s looking directly into the sun, her ears are ringing - she can hear everything acutely and thinks her head might explode, and her skin feels like it’s on fire. She hears movement next to her, the scraping of a chair, then a voice, the voice from her dreams, the voice of the angel that saved her from drowning “Clarke? Clarke, you’re ok, just take it easy.” Clarke winces and Lexa lowers her voice even more, “Clarke, I need you to focus on my voice and my voice alone ok?” Clarke shakes her head, she can’t do it.

She sits up screaming while clutching the sides of her head, “It’s so loud, EVERYTHING is so loud! I feel like my heads going to EXPLODE!” Lexa moves to sit behind Clarke, wrapping her arms around Clarke’s midsection trying to hold her still.

Lexa tries to calm her, “Clarke it's ok, just focus on my voice, and my voice alone. Shhh, it's ok. Shhhh” It’s not working, Clarke is still struggling to focus on Lexa’s voice, so she tries a different tactic, she starts to sing, “Hush-a-bye, don't you cry, go to sleep, my little baby” Lexa notices that Clarke is beginning to struggle less and is becoming less rigid in her arms, so she continues, “When you wake, you shall have all the pretty little horse. Black and bays, dapples and greys, all the pretty little horses. Way down yonder, in the meadow. Poor little baby, crying mama.” Clarke’s becoming limp against her and her breathing is becoming more regular, “Hush-a-leida, don't Yu bon au, gyon au, hos of gon sleep my strisis fyucha. When Yu wake Yu shall have, ogeda the pri strisis gapa’s.” *Hush-a-bye, don't you cry, go to sleep, my little baby. When you wake you shall have all the pretty little horses.* Lexa releases her tight grip around Clarke’s midsection allowing her to move away if she wants, but she doesn’t, if anything she moves closer, so Lexa continues to hum the song in Clarke’s ear while running one hand lazily up and down her left arm. 

Clarke turns to her after she’s hummed the song through a few times, and looks into her eyes while saying “Thank you, I don’t know why everything seemed… seemed so”

“Amplified” Lexa offers up.

“Yes, exactly. How’d you know?”

Lexa looks away from the deep pools of blue gratitude that her eyes hold, noting that a luminescent ring of silver had begun to form around her pupil, making her eyes shine more so than before. Lexa can’t look into Clarke’s trusting eyes for what she is about to tell her, she can’t be holding Clarke either, so she gets up and is now standing in front of Clarke. She squeezes her eyes shut then opens them looking up to Clarke, her eyes glowing, the ring of grass green larger and glowing brighter than it should in her human form, and causes Clarke’s silver ring to glow in response, “Clarke… there’s, there’s something that I need to tell you.”

“What is it, Lexa? Any why do my eyes feel weird? It’s like I can see everything”

“Sorry, that's my fault.”

“Huh?”

“Listen, Clarke.” Clarke looks at her, focused with full attention waiting for what Lexa was to say, “You’re in transition.”

“In what? Lexa, what are you talking about?”

“Look, you know what scratch you got when you came out of the water after tackling me?”

“Yeah…”

“Well when a werewolf - an Alpha werewolf - scratches or bites someone with a dormant mutation to be a werewolf it is activated and they begin to transition.” Clarke just looks at her like she’s telling a bad joke, but when Lexa’s only responds to her stairs is to look down Clarke knows that she’s not joking. 

“You know how you said that you can hear everything and it feels like you can see the smallest detail? And your skin, that feels as though it is burning, your sense of smell has also increased. These are all werewolf traits, our senses are heightened to those of our wolf counterpart. We also become somewhat stronger and faster than a normal human too.” Lexa states matter of factly to a gawking wide-eyed Clarke, who begins shaking her head.

“No, you’re lying. It isn’t true. No. NO.” Despite Clarke’s protests she knows that Lexa isn’t lying, the look on her face, the look in her eyes all show her this; but more than that, somewhere deep inside Clarke knows that Lexa would never knowingly lie to her, and this knowledge scares Clarke more the implications of what she’s just been told. How can she possibly know whether a girl she's known for all but two days would never lie to her or not? 

Two days, it's been two days since she’s been home. “Lexa I need to leave.”

Lexa looks frightened, but quickly pushes the fear off of her face, “Why?”

“It’s been two days since I’ve been home, I didn’t tell anyone I was leaving. There going to be worried about me.”

Lexa’s face now flickers with conflicting emotions, anger that she wouldn’t tell anyone she was leaving, sadness that it was her fault that Clarke had been gone so long, joy that Clarke didn’t want to leave because of her and what she did, but mostly anxiety over how to tell Clarke that it had been four days since their first encounter and two since she’d been scratched. Lexa took a big breath, looked Clarke in the eyes then began “Clarke it’s been two days since I scratched you.”

Lexa let that sink in while she watched Clarke’s eyes grow wide. She began to scramble out the door falling over in her haste, “I have to go they will be so worried!” She got outside and didn’t recognise where they were, she began to panic but saw that Lexa had followed her out, “You have to take me home right now! I need to get back, they’ll be so worried.”

“Calm yourself Clarke. It’s alright, when I found out you were in transition I sent for my fastest rider and sent them to tell your people that you had been in an accident and were receiving care from my healer. I knew that you hadn’t talked to them since our meeting, and didn’t want your people to worry.”

Clarke stops her scrabbling and attempts to figure out where she was and how to get back to Arkadia and looks on at Lexa, gobsmacked, “Oh. Thank you, that’s very courteous of you.” Lexa slightly nods her head and closes her eyes in acknowledgement of Clarke’s comment. “Though I’m sure my mother wasn’t pleased with this news.” 

Clarke says, giving Lexa a sideways glance gauging her reaction, “Yes, Abigail was… quite vocal about her concerns I hear.” 

Clarke just laughed at Lexa then, “Ab… Abigail?” she got out between giggling fits and inhaling. Lexa looked at her and though she knew Clarke was laughing at her (a little bit) she didn’t care, the fact that she had made the concerned, headstrong blonde laugh brought joy to her and the sound, ah the sound melted her heart, tugging her lips into an involuntary smile.

“I should still go back today.” Clarke says once composed, and Lexa’s heart fell - not only because Clarke wants to leave, but because Lexa has to tell her that she can not, at least not yet.

“I can’t let you leave yet Clarke.”

“What do you mean?” Clarke’s voice has gained an edge on it, and Lexa can tell that it won’t be easy persuading her to stay. 

“It would be irresponsible of me to allow you to go back to your people having not been trained to control your new scenes and what being a werewolf entails. Not to mention that you haven’t gone through the final phase yet and therefore are dangerous to both yourself and all those around you weaker than you. However, you are free to go, I won’t keep you here against your will.”

Clarke turns away from Lexa and looks out into the forest, knowing that she’s right. Clarke knows nothing about being a werewolf, which is what she is now, and she doesn’t want to accidently hurt anyone. “What’s the final phase?”

Lexa smirked to herself, knowing that she’s gotten through to Clarke. She walks to Clarke's side, looking out into the forest ahead of them also, “You must accept your wolf, allowing your two separate entities to become one.”

“And if I don’t?” 

Lexa understood Clarke’s fear, but no one ever refused to accept their wolf, it was unheard of… except in the beginning where there was fear. Lexa clenches her jaw and steadies her gaze, making sure that no emotion would play on her face for what she had to say next “Then either one or both of you will die.” Though she controls her face, she cannot control her voice, its cracks and gives away her emotion at the prospect of Clarke’s death.

Clarke is silent for a long moment, unmoving. Time has stopped as the two leaders stand in the middle of a forest, unmoving listening to the sounds of woodland creatures around them. Finally, Clarke turns to Lexa, noting that tears have been silently rolling down Lexa’s face; she reaches out and wipes them away, “How do I complete the final transition?”

Lexa lets out a large sigh, the breath she hadn’t known she was holding, her posture fails, her ridged back becoming slumped under the relief of what Clarke was saying. “You must become one by changing into your wolf, it is then that you will accept one another.” 

“How am I meant to do that? How do you ‘change’ into your wolf?”

Lexa gives Clarke a small smile, and it sends flutters up from Clarke’s stomach into her chest, “You have to relax, call your wolf to you and let it take control.”

“I don’t think I can do that.”

“I will help you, Clarke. You are not alone, and you are safe.” Clarke shivers at the way she clicks the ‘K’ in her name.

She nods before voicing her acceptance of this pairing, “Ok. I trust you.” Lexa nods her head in a curt nod, knowing that she wouldn’t be able to vocalise what those words mean to her. 

She goes to stand behind Clarke, placing her arms on Clarke’s arms, “Ok first you need to relax Clarke, forget everything and melt into me.” And that's exactly what she did. Clarke closes her eyes and relaxes into Lexa’s touch, moulding her body into Lexa’s, creating one form. “Now listen to the wind sweeping through the trees, to the birds as the glide between the branches, landing and singing their songs, to the river that flows to the West. Can you hear it, Clarke?”

Clarke tries to put all of her attention into listening, to the birds, the wind, then to the river - hearing it flow, hearing the ripples as they form and the currents as they pull the river apart in abnormal directions. Clarke tries so hard to focus on all of these sounds but she is acutely aware of the body pressed up against her own, the way their forms fit together perfectly, as though they were adjacent puzzle pieces of a two piece puzzle; together whole. 

Lexa clears her throat, “You’re not focusing Clarke.” She says, more in an amused manner than a scolding one, Clarke can hear the smile in her words. She clicked the ‘K’ again and this causes Clarke to involuntarily moan and press further into Lexa. Lexa says nothing, she doesn’t move away either and when Clarke tries to make a move she tightens her grip around her so she stills. “Clarke, are you relaxed now?” 

“Yes.” she breathes out as though she’d just run a marathon opposed to having just been standing there.

Lexa reluctantly released her grip from around Clarke and steps back, Clarke whines at the loss of contact, making Lexa smiled to herself, “Many things can trigger an untrained wolf to change Clarke, any strong emotion such as anger or fear. This is why I couldn’t let you leave yet, I couldn’t risk that you’d change whilst in the grips of anger and accidently hurt someone.”

“Then why’d you get me to calm down? I thought I had to change to complete the transition?”

“We cannot rely on emotion to call forth our wolves, it is reckless and dangerous. No, you must learn how to call forth your wolf from at will, from want, from the need to change.”

“Ok, so what do I do?”

Lexa looked a her, a smile dancing in her eyes, “Envision your wolf, you have blonde hair - so it is likely that your wolf will be a blonde/white colour - your electric blue eyes with a ring of silver, glowing against the night. Envision yourself free, running through the forest. Envision being one with your wolf, and call to her. Call her to you Clarke.”

Clarke focuses on Lexa’s words and envisions what she thinks she may look like as a wolf as she runs through the forest in her mind's eye. As she's running she comes to the clearing where she and Lexa meet, and there stands a girl. But not just any girl; it was her. She was seeing her body from the wolves perspective, and the wolf from her perspective all at the same time. Her two selves walk towards one another. Her human self reaching out to make contact and her wolf self walking into the outreached hand. The moment the two touch Clarke can feel a sensation of warmth flood her, as though the liquid in her veins had become the lava that supplies life to volcanoes. She opens her eyes as she feels the warmth spreading through her and expanding her form. She closes her eyes for fear that pain will come, but it doesn’t.

Opening her eyes again when the warmth has faded, and she feels a nudge at her side. She sees Lexa, well more accurately Lexa as her wolf. Clarke’s wondering why she changed, why’d she feel that warmth, but when she went to ask all the came out were light growls and grunts. Confused for a moment she looks down at herself, only there isn’t anything to really look down at, just a pair of fluffy white blonde legs. She’s in her wolf form. Stunned Clarke circles herself, turning her head to see a tail, hind legs and a wolf back. She hears Lexa chuckle at her and turns to look at her; she’s meet with vibrant green eyes of the forest and a luminescent ring of grass green that hold only love and joy. In her mind she thinks “Lexa, OMG I’m a wolf. Holy shit, I’m actually a wolf.” 

She’s frightened when she hears a reply, “Haha, yes. Yes, you are. And a magnificent wolf at that.”

“Wait, you can hear me?”

“Yes. Our thoughts are our own when we are wolves, same as when we are humans, however, if we try to communicate with one another as if we were just speaking then we can hear each other in our heads - a skill also afforded to us when in human form.”

“That is incredibly creepy and cool at the same time.”

Lexa just laughs at how Clarke chose to describe what she can now do. “Yes, I suppose it is. Let us not waste more time here Clarke, let us run, teik osir laik breik au.” *Let us be free*

Clarke didn’t have to know Trigedasleng to know what Lexa had said, and quickly took after her when she bounded off into the woods, running, flying through the undergrowth of the wood. Free.

//

They had run for what felt like mere minutes, but was, in fact, hours Clarke had never felt so weightless, so carefree in her entire life. It was just her and Lexa running through the forest, her wolf calling to Lexa’s, playing in the fallen leaves and long grass, pouncing on one another, racing to this tree line and that cave. 

They’d gone back to the lake where they’d first meet and lounged around in the sun; Lexa had convinced Clarke to go for a swim, saying that it was when you were shocked by something (like unexpected cold water) that you were likely to turn back into human form and if she were expecting it then it shouldn’t happen. They’d talked about everything being a werewolf entailed, Clarke’s new abilities - her speed, strength, senses all heightened, the ability to talk to one another through thought (to Clarke’s relief only the people or person that you are addressing can hear what you are saying), Lexa also debunked the myth that they can only change on a full moon and it being a torturous experience (though Clarke had thought that were the case considering her turning experience). Lexa also said that the more time Clarke spent in her wolf form and talking to her wolf the stronger their bond would be and the easier it would be for Clarke to understand what her wolf was saying, her wants and needs, it would also make calling her wolf forth effortless and second nature, as well as minimizing the risk of accidental emotional turnings.

Clarke was fascinated by all of this new information that she was learning and consistently asked questions about one thing or another, getting Lexa to give her a brief werewolf history - how the first known of their kind was the first Commander, the wars fought amongst the Clans to have the strongest wolves, the killing and theft of infants, and how she’d finally created the coalition and united the clans after centuries of war and conflict. Clarke listened with wrapped attention as they walked in the forest, her wolf letting the knowledge of her kind wash over her and bath her in memories of the past.

After the brief history lesson the two walked in silence, Clarke hung back from Lexa trying to compose her thoughts, her wolf wanted her to ask something but Clarke couldn’t decipher what it was, that is until Lexa asked her, “Clarke, are you alright? You seem distracted.” 

“Yeah, ah no. My wolf wants to ask you something, but I can’t figure out what it is, it’s very frustrating.”

Lexa smiled, remembering when she was young and first trying to communicate with her wolf, “Yes, it can be frustrating. What I found helped was to not think about getting the answer, just leaving your mind open, then the thoughts will flow freely between the two of you.” She paused for a moment before continuing, “The problem most people have is that they have a barrier up from their wolf that blocks communication and stops them from truly becoming one.” 

Clarke thinks over what Lexa has said for a moment before closing her eyes and letting her mind go blank, she allows the walls that keep people out, that keep the memories of the past at bay to fall, allowing her mind to flow freely, allowing everything to seep into her conscious. She waits for the onslaught of her past to consume her, but it doesn’t. Instead she hears whimpers and growls, she opens her eyes expecting it to be Lexa trying to talk to her, but Lexa’s face is impassive and then she hears her in her head, “What’s wrong Clarke?”

“Did you just try to say something to me?”

“No, why?”

“I thought I heard whines and growls.”

“That would be your wolf trying to communicate with you like I told you before, we cannot communicate with our wolves in English or Trigedasleng, it’s more...intuitive.” She pauses ”Just listen and see if you can understand.”

Clarke nods and closes her eyes again, opening her mind to her wolf. Her eyes shoot open with understanding when she is able to decipher what her wolf wants. “Lexa, can I ask you a question?”

“Yes, of course, Clarke.”

“How are mates chosen?”

“Mates aren’t ‘chosen’ per say, people chose who they wish to be with, but because we are one with our wolves they have to also approve of our intended mates.” 

“Oh.”

Clarke looks thoughtful again, but Lexa waits until she is ready to speak, “Do werewolves have true mates?”

Lexa stills. Her eyes searching Clarkes’ for something, green eyes piercing blue. She looks away and thinks about her response for a long moment, leaving them in suspended silence. Clarke’s ready to run, run from the vacuum that has consumed them, sucking away all the noise of the birds songs, of the leaves rustling and falling in the wind; the only thing left is the panting breaths of these two still wolves that could be considered status. But she doesn’t, she doesn’t dare to move, to make a sound and fracture the silence, for fear that it will break the world.

Lexa finally meets Clarke's’ eyes again, this time soft, “This is what your wolf wanted to know?” Clarke nod’s, unable to articulate her answer, “Yes, it is possible to have a true mate. However, it is very rare, and hasn’t been heard of for several generations.” 

Clarke and her wolf process Lexa’s response and fire more questions at her, “How can you tell if two people are true mates? How is it any different from choosing a mate?”

“True mates can be told apart from normal mates because their bond is stronger - they are able to feel each other from great distances and tell one another's emotions, legend also states that when true mates make love for the first time a light radiates from them, allowing for their half souls to form one, as according to legend true mates were once the same star, separated and waiting to become whole again, when they mate they become whole once again. This is why they are so rare; most stars remain whole. True mates are drawn to one another, it has been said that they can feel their other half subconsciously, and gravitate towards them. It has been said that their wolves will often know before their human self-will.”

Clarke hadn’t known what to say so she let her wolf take over, she felt herself move to Lexa’s side and nudge her, rubbing her head against Lexa’s neck. Lexa purred and Clarke laughed at her, nudging her once more before running back the way they’d come with Lexa trailing behind.

When they get back to Nyko’s home the sun has almost sunk below the horizon and Lexa motions Clarke over to a bushed area just left of the entrance to Nyko’s home, Clarke is surprised to see two stacks of clothing folded neatly behind the bush, the first her clothes, clean and dry, the second she presumed was Lexa’s, black trousers and top, with armour, settled neatly beside it on top a long piece of red fabric. Clarke stood behind the bush for a moment, waiting to change back into her human form, when she did not she whined, quite loudly, she heard Lexa laugh - she heard LEXA laugh, not her wolf but the girl, Clarke turned so fast that she almost fell over her feet at seeing a naked Lexa standing beside her. She stayed there gawking at Lexa shamelessly, that is until she gets caught.

Lexa laughed at her again, her obvious lack of exposure to nudity apparent and her awkwardness at the interaction showing, “Clarke don’t be so shocked. It isn’t odd for my people to see each other naked, as that is what happens when we turn back.” 

Though Lexa stated this matter of factly Clarke couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy towards anyone else that had ever seen Lexa naked and let out a small possessive growl. She hated herself for it; she didn’t own this girl, she wasn’t even hers, what right did she have to be jealous? 

Lexa heard Clarke's growl and could see the change in her demeanour and quickly threw on her top and pants before kneeling before her, “Clarke.” Clarke looked anywhere but at Lexa, so she grabbed her face and forced her to look into her eyes, “Clarke, it’s ok. As Commander, I always have my privacy.” Lexa didn’t know why she was reassuring Clarke about this, but it seemed to make the girl and her wolf relax so Lexa was glad. 

She spoke to Clarke in her head, “Are you having trouble changing back?”

“Yes, I tried to clear my mind and think of myself in my human form, like how I did to turn into my wolf but it didn’t work.”

“Your mind is too busy, you need to calm down.”

“I’m trying.” 

Clarke closes her eyes again, allowing her wolf to flow through her, for them to become one, calming herself, calling her human form back - but then she’d get distracted by the scent of the girl in front of her; earth mixed with pine and something uniquely Lexa. The smell intoxicated Clarke and she was unable to think of anything else. All she wanted was to be back in human form so that she could pull Lexa closer and taken in more of her scent. With that thought Clarke felt the flood of warmth to her body again and then suddenly felt the chill evening breeze against her skin. Her eyes flew open, meet with a pair of dilated eyes, the pupils so large that you almost couldn’t see the forest green iris that surrounded them, she was sure her’s were no different. 

Clarke’s eyes flickered down to Lexa’s lips, Lexa’s did the same. Both girls moving slowly towards each other, eyes flicking back and forth from eyes to mouths and back again, blue piercing green; just inches apart. But before they meet Lexa pulls away and looks down. She extends her arm, scooping up Clarke’s clothing and passing them to her, with eyes still downcast she says “I’m sorry.” before getting up and leaving a very exposed Clarke alone behind the bush. She's left to question what just happened and wonder what went wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I already had a large majority of the second chapter written and finished writing it tonight so that you could get your fanfic fix for the evening it ;) however, that does mean that the next update will be a bit longer of a wait as I haven't started on it yet, not to worry, I am currently on school holidays and will most likely have enough free time to give it to you in the next week or so. Happy reading, as always let me know what you think, any suggestions, anything you want to know that I've missed out.


	3. A new love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa become a bit more than accidental injury buddies.

Clarke stayed behind the bush for what she hoped was a lifetime after finishing getting dressed; she didn’t want to face Lexa, she didn’t even want to be near Lexa after making the complete and utter fool she made of herself. Lexa obviously wasn’t interested in her that way and Clarke just wanted to go home and get trashed with Raven and Octavia to take her mind off of it. But she knew she couldn’t go home. Not yet. She still had so much to learn about being a werewolf and she didn’t want to accidentally hurt one of her friends. She sighed, knowing that she had to face Lexa sooner or later - she would prefer later, but knew that it had been long enough.

Coming around from the bush she couldn’t see anyone, so she stilled and listened. She could hear Lexa and Nyko talking inside, but couldn’t make out what they were saying, probably a good thing, she didn’t like to eavesdrop and she had a feeling it may be about her. She hadn’t notice at first, because of her inner turmoil oversee Lexa after their almost kiss, but she could see her surroundings almost perfectly, as though it were the middle of the day. She walked to the trees and touched the leaves, marvelling at how clearly she could see the individual veins running through them. Everything was illuminated and seemed to have its own light, it was beautiful. She looked up to the night sky, the stars and moon shone brighter than she’d ever seen them from earth; it was like she was back on the Arch, looking out at earth from her room and watching the stars light up the eternal darkness that threatened to consume them, shining just to stay alive; the moon a beacon to those who were lost in the night. Sighing she muttered under her breath, “Huh, so beautiful. Must be another werewolf perk”

“Yes, it is. It’s quite handy when mounting an attack at night I must say.” Clarke jumped not having heard Lexa come out of the house, she didn’t turn from where she stood to look over the forest and up at the night sky, remembering how things were before. Lexa didn’t move either, but Clarke could feel her intense gaze on her back. They stood like that; Clarke watching the stars and Lexa watching Clarke for a long time, the silence swirling around them on the evening breeze, promising peace and tranquillity. 

Clarke heard the slightest movement and then Lexa was standing next to her. “It’s a beautiful night.” she offered, still watching Clarke as she spoke, “The stars are shining brightly for you Clarke kom Skaikru.” Clarke didn’t know what to say, so she just nodded her head in response, still caught up in her memories. 

After a moment she pushed them back behind the wall she kept herself safe with and paid attention to those around her, a question forming in her head “Lexa, why does everything glow?”

Lexa looked at Clarke, then at their surroundings. She doesn’t answer right away, and this makes Clarke think that she’s made a mistake in asking, that it’s not a werewolf thing and she’s just going crazy, she’s about to tell Lexa to forget she asked when her reply came, “I’m not fully aware of what you’re talking about, it’s a special gift that our born healers have if they’re werewolves, something I am not; however, I’ve been told that it is the life force of any living thing. If you’d like I can ask Nyko to explain it to you further.”

“Yes, I’d like that very much.” Lexa moved to go get Nyko to finish explaining to Clarke what she was seeing, but before she could go, Clarke, spoke again, “It can wait till later, I still have more questions for you.” Lexa nodded then turned to resume her place next to Clarke.

Clarke had to fight the urge to move closer and snuggle into Lexa’s side, so to distract herself she sat down and played with the grass, the same green as the ring that swirled around Lexa’s eyes when she was a wolf. “You said ‘your born healers’ what does that mean?”

Lexa sat down next to Clarke and she looked up at Lexa and into her eyes; eyes that were shining brighter than the stars in the sky, the grass green ring standing out against her pupils and bringing the forest green of her irises to life. Clarke could feel her body heat radiating off of her in waves, and allowed herself to seek comfort in it “Some people are born to be leaders, some to be soldiers, and some to be healers. In your culture someone's nature determines what they do, it is the same except it manifests itself in a physical form in my culture. In the case of a healer, they are able to sense something's life force. When we first meet I knew you were your people's leader, when I brought you here after your head injury I asked if you were their healer because of your nature, you have traits for being both a leader and healer and when you became a wolf those manifested themselves physically into gifts that will help you on your journey.”

Clarke forced her eyes from Lexa’s and to the ground, forcing them shut as she held back the pain that being the ‘leader’ to her people had caused, she saw all the faces of those that had died at her hands and she whispered out into the night, “I never asked for that. I never asked to be their leader. I’ve just been trying to keep us alive.”

Clarke feels a tug at her chin, and opens her eyes as Lexa leads her face up to her own, they lock eyes as Lexa says, “You were born for this Clarke, same as me.” Clarke wants to tear her eyes away - Lexa doesn’t know all that she’s done since they’ve been on the ground, all that she’s done to keep them alive, but Clarke can never escape it nor can she forget, it haunts her - but she can’t tear her eyes away, not from ones that bore into her soul with such concern, empathy, and care. She’s transfixed, bewitched even, and there's nothing she can do, nor wants to, to stop the feelings the surge within her.

She moves on instinct her wolf guiding her, urging her on before she can question and second guess what she's about to do before she can stop herself and prevent another rejection like the one before. She closes the gap between Lexa and herself, never taking her eyes off of Lexa’s, silently seeking permission when Lexa softly sighs and opens her mouth Clarke takes that as agreement and continues until they are almost touching. Her hand finds its way to Lexa’s cheek and cups it while she leans in the rest of the way in, their mouths meeting hers engulfing Lexa’s as she deepens the kiss. Lexa’s own hands go to Clarke’s face as Clarke moves to straddle her, slowly lower herself on Lexa, pushing them both to the ground, and deepening the kiss as they go. They lay under the stars kissing for the most perfect of moments, Clarke’s wolf is ecstatic at being this close to Lexa, at being on top of Lexa, at just being with Lexa, and Clarke can’t say she blames her, she feels the same way, and by the way Lexa is moaning into the kiss and gripping Clarke's face and neck she suspects she feels the same. 

Clarke takes a breath and is struck with Lexa’s scent, it is so much stronger than when they were in the forest, she lets it wrap around her, the smell of the earth mixed with pine and that something that was uniquely Lexa, Clarke lets it comfort and calm her. Consequently, she’d stopped kissing Lexa, a fact that she was made aware of when Lexa whined in protest. Letting out a small laugh she leans back down and places a small peak on Lexa’s lips before pulling back again, this time instead of whining Lexa growls at the loss of contact; making Clarke let out a full laugh, “You’re so cute when you want something.”

“I can be more than cute Clarke.” 

She says as she wraps her legs above Clarke’s hips and rolls them, making Clarke scream, “Ahh, Lexa!” she half yells half laughs as she’s placed below Lexa as she straddles her.

“Mmmh, I think I like this view better.”

“Oh, so you didn’t like the view of me on top of you, Lexa?”

Lexa leans down so that their bottom lips are almost touching, and with a smile says, “I never said that.” before Clarke can think of a quip remark Lexa initiates a soft, slow kiss, that quickly turns hard and rushed as they both seek more from the other.

Lexa finally pulls away causing Clarke to release a primal whine of her own, Lexa looks down at smiles before says, “What do you want Nyko?”

He clears his throat before answering and Clarke hopes that he isn’t looking at them, because if he is a wolf she knows that he’ll be able to see them, “Forgive me if I’m disturbing you Heda,” Yep he can definitely see them she thinks, “But you’d asked me to inform you if any new news came from either the Skaikru camp or Polis.”

“Well? Which is there news from Nyko?”

“Polis, Heda, a rider has arrived with a message from the leaders of the twelve clans for you.”

“Where is he?”

“Inside Heda.”

“Very well.” Lexa gets off of Clarke and gracefully stands, extending a hand to pull Clarke to her feet, which she accepts, rising less gracefully than Lexa had. As all three move back to the entrance of Nyko’s home Lexa stops causing the other to as well, “Nyko, Clarke seems to be displaying the healer's gifts, I was wondering if you might be willing to talk with her about them and what they mean?”

Nyko gives Clarke a sideways look, as though she were something unfortunate on the bottom of his shoe, but when he looks back to Lexa all he says is, “As you wish Heda.”

“Good, I will deal with my business from Polis then come to check in on you two.” And with that, she left Nyko and Clarke alone in the night.

“So, you’re a healer then?”

“That's what Lexa seems to think, yes.”

“I’ll be the judge of that.” and with that Nyko stalks off towards the woods, at the edge he turns to look back at Clarke expectantly and impatiently “Are you coming?” he gruffs; Clarke is unfazed by his manner and strides to his side with a smile on her face, “Most definitely, I think we’re going to be fast friends Nyko.” She doesn’t know if it’s her confident stride or her bravado but Nyko shakes his head a lets the smallest of smiles creep onto his face, sighing what sounds like, “Oh Heda.” before turning away and continuing into the forest with Clarke at his side. 

//

By the time Lexa’s finished with the messenger and sent him off back to Polis the sun has begun to rise in the sky, fighting off the final phases of darkness that linger, casting their shadows on the world. She’s surprised that Nyko and Clarke haven’t returned yet, however knowing Nyko as she does - the loyal subject - he wouldn’t have returned even if they had finished, not till he was summoned and her work was done. Lexa found her people's adoration and obedience odd sometimes, even unsettling. She knows that it is their way, not to question and obey their Heda - she’d done it herself once upon a time - but it still felt odd when you were on the receiving end of it. Clarke on the other hand, she was a different matter entirely. She didn’t numbly obey commands, or follow orders, she was a free spirit who did as she pleased; and yet she still did what was right for her people despite the personal cost it had on her, Lexa was perplexed by this girl - who wanted nothing more than to be free and yet allowed herself to stay shackled when she had the key the whole time.

As Lexa made her way through the forest, following Nyko and Clarke’s scent she allowed herself the indulgence of letting thoughts of the blonde to wrap around her and consume her consciousness. She stopped when she’d heard voices, her thoughts slipping away with the darkness and her mind becoming sharp and warrior like once more.

She looked at her surroundings, she was at the bottom of a high cliff face with a thunderous waterfall that she recognised, it had been where she and the other night bloods had been brought to train for their concave, to be taught what it meant to be Heda, to be a wolf, and what they must know to be successful in their duty if chosen. 

She took in the surroundings that had once been her home for many moons and marvelled at the fact that they seemed unchanged, as though it hadn’t been years since she’d last been here, but mere moments. She took in the the sheer force of the waterfall and the thesaurus storm it created when crashing into the otherwise peaceful pool beneath, the way the light caught and reflected on the water and the leaves, seeming to illuminate everything to such a height that Lexa had to shield her eyes from the sheer intensity of it all. She looked at the open expanse of the meadow where she and the others would train - and in the beginning play. Her eyes took in the entire scene before her, playing out memories she long thought dead, until her eyes rested on something that was new, and seemingly out of place. Her eyes rested on the back of a girl sitting cross-legged on the cusp of grass transforming into rock and stone. On the long golden locks that feel carelessly down her back and around her shoulders. She closes her eyes and sniffed as the wind brought her sent to her, intoxicating as it was Lexa lets it consume her, remembering how strong and wonderful it had been the previous night when she was on top of her, and then under her. The scent of sun, she smelled of warmth and something Lexa couldn’t place, something she couldn’t name, something that is Clarke. Her wolf stirs at her thoughts of Clarke both on top then beneath her, her wolf had wanted Clarke so much that it terrified Lexa. It had taken all of Lexa’s willpower to leave Clarke when they had turned back, everything in her body was screaming for her to stay, to kiss her, and that was why she had to leave. She could sense how it had killed Clarke for her to leave, how it made her feel and that was worse for Lexa, Clarke’s pain made her feel as though a whole had been ripped into her chest and she’d desperately wanted to go back and kiss her senseless, but she didn’t, she’s remained her where she was, planted to the ground - terrified that if she tried to move away that she’d end up going back to Clarke. But later on, it would seem that all her fight had been for nought, her connection to Clarke, that pull was undeniable and it hurt more than it should when she tried.

Lexa opened her eyes, still hidden in the forest, watching Clarke as she watched Nyko, listening intently to what he was saying, gaining knowledge she’d thought to be a fantasy only days before. Lexa stays hidden and watches them, content knowing that Clarke was safe, her wolf at ease with this knowledge - it's then that she realises how distracted and how uneasy she’d been without Clarke’s presence when speaking to the messenger; her eyes grow wide with the knowledge. How could she possibly care about this girl so much? How could her mere presence put Lexa at ease like nothing else? How could the lack of her presence make Lexa feel like she’s lost a limb - an existential and essential part of herself?

While Lexa’s wolf tries to calm her she notices something else, Clarke is no longer paying attention to Nyko - to his displeasure - instead, she is looking around her searching for something, she doesn’t find it in her seated position she stands and turns around. It doesn’t take her long to spot Lexa and when she does blue eyes lock onto green, silver rings bore into green, Lexa feels exposed despite being wrapped in the safety of the shadows that haven’t been chased away with the dawn, she feels utterly vulnerable and she can’t place why. Her wolf coups at the contact, strikingly intimate and personal despite not being physically connected. When Nyko asks what Clarke is looking at Lexa steps out of the shadows, only breaking her eye contact from Clarke once Nyko addresses her, “Monin Heda.”

Clarke casts her eyes down and shakes her head, as though she’s confused over what just happened. Lexa gives him a curt nod in response, wanting to watch Clarke more. She walks over to them, keeping Clarke in her vision while not looking directly at her, she notices Clarke’s eyes on her the entire time she walks to them; unwavering when she stands in front of them.

Silence hangs in the air and Lexa can’t stand the defining sound any longer, “Is she indeed a healer Nyko?” She asks purely to have a topic of conversation, already knowing the answer to her question. 

“Yes, Heda. Her instincts are strong, stronger than any wolf I’ve seen for many moons. She may even be equally or more gifted than Lincoln. Perhaps as gifted as myself.” 

This news surprises Lexa, and it shows on her face. Other than Nyko Lincoln is their strongest healer, and the fact that Clarke may be on par with Nyko is staggering. Her brow creased with confusion and Nyko speaks, “Heda, do you think there’s something wrong with the conclusions I’ve come to?”

“No Nyko, I believe your findings are correct, however, you’ve noticed her leadership gifts as well have you not?”

“Yes Heda, it’s what made me question you when you first insinuated that she was a healer.” 

“I’ve done my own evaluation of her skills but am interested to hear your conclusions.”

Nyko looks sideways at Clarke, who still hadn’t taken her eyes off of Lexa, he studies her for a long moment before speaking, “Perhaps it would be best if we spoke of this in private.” 

That is all the answer Lexa needed to confirm that she was right, but she still wants to hear him say it, “No Nyko, she needs to hear this too.” Lexa says looking down at Clarke who appears so childlike as she looks up at Lexa.

“Very well. I’ve conclude that as well as being a powerful healer that Clarke kom Skaikru is also a powerful leader” He pauses, unsure of whether to go on or not, when Lexa remain unmoving and impassive her continues, “She has the gifts afforded only to Heda.”

Clarke doesn’t quite know what this means but she understands that it is a big deal. She begins to worry about what this might mean for herself and for her people. All she knows is that Nyko has just said she is both a powerful healer and leader - possibly revealing himself (though that means little to Clarke, however, she doubts Lexa would bring her to a weak healer) and Lexa. She knows that having such power will bring enemies that want to kill her for her power and she’s afraid that one of those will be Lexa. She looks to Lexa, her eyes wide and afraid, afraid of what might stare back at her, afraid that her fears will be confirmed. But when Lexa does look down at her all she sees is softness and love, perhaps even fear of her own, but not fear that Clarke is too powerful, fear that someone will see that as a threat. 

Lexa tears her eyes away from Clarkes and speaks in the quietest most deadly voice that Clarke had ever heard, “No one can know. You will speak of this to no one. Is that Clear.” The last part wasn’t a question, it was a statement and there was no question as to what Lexa would do if he disobeyed her command. Nyko looked down as if compelled by the power of the Alpha's command, “Understood Heda.” When Lexa looks to Clarke she seems a little surprise that the girl is still on her feet and not bowing like Nyko, and Clarke makes a note to ask about it later.

“Nyko you will train Clarke to use and hone her gifts of healing.”

“Yes, Heda.”

“When you two aren’t working together I will be working with you, Clarke.” Clarke looks a bit surprised but lets Lexa continue speaking. “I will teach you about the leadership skills you possess along with how to control your wolf and anything else you need to know, such as fighting skills.”

Clarke bows her head, “Mochof Heda.” Clarke’s use of Trigedasleng throws Lexa off balance and she blinks at the girl, unsure of her, questioning what she knows of her once again.

“We were finished Heda if you’d like to take over.” 

Lexa blinks at him still dazed by Clarke, trying to register his words. It takes her far too long to reply, “Yes, Mochof Nyko. Yu may gyon au, hos of.” *Yes, thank you Nyko. You may go.*

He nods bowing his head slightly before disappearing into the woods where Lexa had emerged. Lexa looks from the space where Nyko had been consumed by the thick forest to where the Blonde stood before her, watching her, looking at her expectantly. When Lexa says nothing Clarke asks one of the many questions that's been on her mind, “Will my people be safe?” 

Hexa laughs to herself, of course, this girl is only worried for her people when her power could mean the end of her own life, “Yes, you, Nyko and I are the only ones who know what you are and know your power. Both YOU and your people are safe.”

“But what if he does tell someone?”

Lexa looks at her with a slight fire of anger in her eyes, she's insinuating that one of Lexa’s subjects - a trusted healer - would betray her. Though it’s not Clarke’s fault, Lexa knows that she is scared for herself and her people, knows that she’s unaware of the bounds of loyalty Nyko has for her, nor that he cannot betray her even if he wanted to - something that Lexa know she must teach Clarke about. “Clarke he won’t be telling anyone. Not even if he wanted to, he cannot.”

“What do you mean Lexa?”

“Did you notice how he bowed before when I said my command that no one was to know of your power?” Clarke nods, brow crest as she thinks about what happened before, “It happens when an Alpha imposes their will on others - we throw strength behind our words so that weaker wolves must obey.” She pauses for a moment, “The only way he’d tell anyone is if a stronger Alpha imposes their will on him and commands him to do so. However, the threat of that is unlikely.” 

“Why is it unlikely?” 

Lexa looks at her with a small glint in her eyes, “Because the only wolf that can withstand my commands has a vested interest in keeping it a secret.” 

It takes Clarke a moment to catch on to what she was saying, brow crest thinking over her words and what they meant, “Me...I...I can withstand your commands?”

“I believe so yes. You didn’t bow when I commanded that no one was to know. Anyone else would, even a human.”

“What does that mean exactly?” Clarke asks carefully, afraid that the new information of her power will make her a threat and therefore a target for Lexa, the thought hurts her and her wolf and she lets out a small whine that captures Lexa’s attention immediately.

“I will never allow harm to come to you Clarke. Not from anyone else's hand nor my own.” Her words carried so much strength, so much certainty and Clarke was soothed by them. She moved closer to Lexa as she continued to speak, “Clarke I believe as you know that you are an Alpha, I also believe that you have similar power to my own, perhaps more.” she pauses, looking Clarke in the eyes before continuing, “I would like to try something, if you would permit it.”

Clarke cranes her neck to look up at Lexa, now standing only a finger's width apart, she looks up into Lexa's eyes, “I trust you.” Lexa rocks back as if Clarke had just slapped her rather than told her she trusted her - for the second time. Lexa gave her an unsure nod and then look a step back, turning to walk a few meters away from Clarke; missing her warmth and scent when she did, from the look on Clarke’s face Lexa could tell she felt similarly and smirked to herself, which earned her an eye roll and small smile from Clarke. 

“I’m going to try command you to do something, ok?” Clarke just nods, looking slightly anxious, “I only want you to do it if you feel compelled by a force to do it.” Clarke nods again, awaiting Lexa’s command, “Come here.” is all she says, but Clarke can feel the power behind it and her feet move with a mind of their own getting closer to Lexa before she whispers, “Stop.” Clarke can feel the same power behind the command but she can’t stop, she keeps moving towards Lexa, so Lexa speaks again, more power behind her words, “STOP!” Clarke’s step falters with the intensity of Lexa’s command, she stays put for a moment before continuing slower, it’s more difficult for her to move now and it shows in her pace. Lexa looks on at her in disbelief, she is disobeying Lexa’s commands, she can see that they’re affecting her, and yet she keeps coming. When Clarke is within reaching distance Lexa can’t take it anymore and she puts all of her strength behind her words, “CLARKE, STOP!” Clarke stops dead in her tracks, Lexa waits a moment and when she knows that the girl won’t be moving she collapses to the ground, feeling exhausted from the effort of commanding the Blonde. As soon as she falls her command is broken and Clarke rushes to her, coming to a crashing halt on her knees at Lexa’s side asking if she is ok, “Lexa, OH MY GOD, LEXA! Are you ok, what’s wrong, what happened?” Clarke is looking over her, searching for a wound, for something that would explain her collapse.

“I’m fine Clarke, it's just something that happens when you use your power resources. I’ll be fine in a moment.” They sit in silence as Lexa gets her breath back, she is covered in sweat at her efforts to stop Clarke from advancing towards her, her breathing is jagged and irregular and Clarke looks at her with concern, but Lexa ignores it and focuses on regulating her breathing, ”in and out pause, in and out pause.” she thinks, remembering her training from when she was younger, a memory of Anya pops into her head, “Lexa you must learn to control your temper!” She’d yelled at Lexa after turning during the middle of an argument with another in her class and attacking them, “If you are to become Heda you must be able to remain in control and be the one defusing these situations, not igniting them.” Lexa had been ashamed of her actions, luckily the child was a wolf and healed quickly so no permanent damage was done, but still. “I’m going to teach you a way of controlling your anger and remaining impassive to those around you.” Lexa had looked up at her in wonder, and hope, hope that this secret will help her to ascend to become the next Heda. “Close your eyes.” Lexa does as she’s told, “Now focus on your breathing, shut out all of your senses and just focus on your breathing, the rise and fall of your chest, the expansion of your diaphragm.” Lexa does as she is told and becomes frustrated when nothing happens, she is about to open her eyes when she felt a gentle but firm hand on her arm, “Try again. In pause, out pause. And again.” Lexa does this and feels herself calming down, she’s becoming less restless and more at ease. “Good, now open your eyes.” Lexa’s eyes shoot open and are being stared back at by Anya’s amber brown ones. “Any time you think you’re going to lose control remember this Lexa.” 

Lexa is shook out of the memory by Clarke calling to her name, “Lexa? Lexa!” Lexa can feel the power behind her name, Clarke is trying to impose her will to bring Lexa back to the present, she takes one more longing look at her younger self and Anya in her mind's eye before returning to the land of the living. Her eyes snap open and are meet with fierce, concerned blue ones. Clarke’s eyes soften when she meets Lexa’s and sees that she is ok, then they darken, her electric blue iris clouding and becoming more of an ocean storm, her pupils grow the longer she looks a Lexa, eyes flickering down to her lips and then back up to her eyes again, Lexa can feel her own body responding, feel her muscles contracting then releasing, her lips lick her bottom lip, and she can feel her own pupils expand the longer she looks at Clarke.

Neither girl moves, both stay where they are looking longingly at one another. The sounds of the world fade around them and Lexa can only focus on Clarke, the way her chest rises and falls with her jagged breathing, her breath getting hitched in her throat, her lip becoming caught underneath her teeth causing a moan to escape Lexa’s lips as she wishes it were her who was biting Clarke’s lip. Clarke looks at her again and a mischievous glint appears in her eyes, she’s debating something with herself and Lexa has no idea what it is until she speaks, “Kiss me.” she says breathlessly. Lexa looks at her, shock at the command hidden within, a smile plays on her lips, she knows what Clarke’s doing, she’s trying to see if she has a power effect on Lexa. When Lexa doesn’t move Clarke tried again, “Lexa, kiss me.” She throws more power behind this command and Lexa begins to move, just before their lips touch Clarke speaks again, “STOP.” it’s a harsh whisper that carries more power than any previous command, Lexa stops instantly, hovering above Clarke’s lips, longing to feel them against her own. “Only kiss me if it’s what you want.” Clarke throws almost all of her power behind the command, making sure that it is Lexa’s choice to kiss her, and isn’t from her coercion. The effort, along with their proximity leaves her breathless. There is a moment of pause before Lexa continues her forward movement, their lips meeting in a soft sweet kiss. Lexa works her mouth against Clarke’s, Clarke moans at the sensation, opening her mouth to allow Lexa entry - something that she takes full advantage of, using her tongue to explore Clarke’s mouth. Clarke’s hands move to the nape of Lexa’s neck and into her hair pulling her closer, Lexa’s hands move to the sides of Clarke’s face, fingertips brushing her hairline. They stay intertwined and connected for the longest time, letting the sun wash over their forms and warm them, neither one deepening the kiss, content with their current rhythm.

Clarke is the one to finally break their kiss, and the spell that they’d been under is broken, but not entirely. “That was nice.” she breaths, smiling as she does.

“I can think of a lot of words to describe that, and nice isn’t one of the highest on my list.” Lexa smiles back at her, and her smile widens. 

Clarke presses her forehead to Lexa’s, sighing “What have you done to me?”

Lexa chuckles, “I was about to ask the same thing of you.” 

Clarke pushes at her shoulder and Lexa lets herself fall to the ground, “I know what I could do to you.” Clarke teases with the wild glint in her eye that Lexa loves oh so much.

Lexa moves closer to her, wrapping Clarke in her arms, moving their faces closer together, “Oh is that so?” she teases, moving even closer “And what might that be Clarke?” she clicks the ‘k’ and Clarke shutters, green eyes are alight with playful fire and Clarke is struck by how much she cares for Lexa. She is breathless and unable to control her voice, so instead leans in for another kiss. Before their lips meet she is thrust into the air, strong arms around her and she can’t help the shriek the escapes her lips, “Lexa! Lexa put me down.” She’s laughing the entire time.

Lexa looks down at her with a wicked grin on her face, “As you wish.” And throws her into the pool of water beside them. Clarke hits the water with a loud splash and when she reemerged Lexa jumps in after her, causing a tide of water to hit her. When Lexa doesn’t re-emerge right away Clarke becomes worried, but that disappears when she feels strong arms wrap around her and her neck is assaulted with kisses. 

Clarke moans before slapping Lexa’s arm half-heartedly, “You scared me!” 

“I’m sorry, but you’re just so irresistible.”

“Not by kissing me Lexa, I thought you’d drowned having jumped in fully clothed.”

She can feel Lexa’s smile on her neck, “I think you’ll find that I did not.” 

Clarke is taken aback by her comment for a moment and looks to where Lexa jumped into the pool of water, sure enough, her clothes lay in a pile there, she reached behind her encircling Lexa’s waist and felt the bare skin beneath, Clarke hesitantly turned to face her, she wasn’t completely naked, she had on a leather bra and pantie set - well what Clarke knew to be a bra and panties. She shamelessly gawked at Lexa’s body through the water causing her to chuckle and wear a smug grin, “Like what you see?”

Clarke takes a sharp inhalation of air, “Yes. Very much.”

Lexa’s face soften and her smug smile turns into one of soft affection, she looks into Clarke’s eyes and shyly states, “As do I.” Clarke laughs at how Lexa went from being so confident to shy in an instant and moves closer to her kissing her jaw bone then down her neck.

“Good, I would hate to think it was just me.” She says against Lexa’s skin.

“Let me assure you that it is not.” She says before wrapping her arms around Clarke’s thighs bringing them up to wrap around her waist and palms her ass, Clarke wraps her arms around Lexa’s neck as she takes her mouth with her own in a deep and heavy kiss, moving over to the waterfall. The closer they get the louder the roaring gets, Clarke breaks their kiss to look at the treacherous falling water and her eyes hold a question to which Lexa answers with another kiss moving them swiftly underneath the falling rapids and safely to the other side without incident. The other side of the wall of water is calm, there's a small rock ledge that Lexa moves them over to, she presses Clarke’s back against it and deepens their kiss exciting moans from Clarke. 

Clarke tries to take control and when Lexa denies her she bites her bottom lip with enough force that the warrior moans loudly into her mouth. Lexa deepens the kiss with renewed vigour after Clarke bites her lip, Clarke’s arms move from around Lexa’s neck moving down her arms and chest, encircling her waist before her hands start wandering around Lexa’s midsection, her fingertips occasional grazing against Lexa’s breasts. Lexa moans with pleasure and Clarke becomes bolder, now moving her entire hand to rest over Lexa’s breasts, cupping and squeezing, wishing that she weren’t wearing her damn leather bra, wishing that she herself was in a further state of undress, so she takes her hands off of Lexa’s body, causing her to whimper with displeasure Clarke smiles as she kisses her with a promise of returning before gripping the hem of her t-shirt and peeling the wet material from her form and over her head, throwing it on the rocky ledge behind her. Lexa mouth immediately finds her neck and travels the length of her collarbone leaving light kisses in her wake, she slowly moves down to Clarke’s breasts kissing the skin that is above the waterline. Lexa follows her trail of kiss back up to Clarke’s mouth and kisses her hard once more. 

When they break apart both have wild eyes, with pupils that almost encompass their entire iris, both filled with need and want for the other. Lexa knows that if she doesn’t stop now then there will be no going back, so when Clarke goes in to kiss her again she turns her face away so that she is only meet with Lexa’s cheek. When Clarke pulls away her eyes are full of sadness at Lexa’s rejection and she begins to try and untangle herself from Lexa, trying to push her arms away from her thighs, but Lexa holds strong, her wolf yelling to her to fix this, only releasing one hand so that she can pull Clarke’s face to meet her own, “Clarke. Clarke, look at me please.” the need in Lexa’s voice compels Clarke to look at her, but when she does Lexa can see the change, her eyes are no longer full of desire and want, they are steelie and hard, a fire burns within them, she can also see that Clarke is trying so hard not to cry, and something in Lexa breaks, her wolf howls, crying out for her Clarke to come back - knowing that she’s the cause of this reaction, she’s the cause of Clarke’s hurt. 

When she tries to speak again her voice breaks with emotion, “Clarke I want you. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone or anything.” she pauses to gauge Clarke’s reaction when Clarke stops trying to move away from her she continues, “I only stopped because I don’t want our first time to be in a cave at the back of a waterfall, you deserve so much more than that. You deserve the heavens and all of the stars, you deserve the world and I want to give you all of it.” 

Clarke just looks on at her, her mind working, deciding if she should say what she wants to say or not. Lexa doesn’t think she’s going to reply but she does, “I want only you. I don’t want, nor do I deserve all of that - I don’t even deserve you, but I’m selfish and I want you despite it.” 

Lexa can’t believe what she’s hearing, Clarke wants her back, Clarke feels as she does, though neither can say it yet it is written all over both of their faces. Lexa moves to kiss Clarke and she lets her. “You may not think you deserve me Clarke, but it is I who doesn’t deserve you.” 

Clarke just looks at her as though she’s crazy, I suppose they have that in common, thinking that they are unworthy of the other. They leave the back of the waterfall and spend the rest of the day in the sun as Lexa continues to teach Clarke about wolf history and begins to tell and teach her about the leadership skills that are heightened by being a wolf. Lexa takes her through a few basic defensive fighting techniques and they don’t go back to Nyko’s home until the sun has already dipped below the horizon, Lexa encouraging Clarke to use her senses to find their way back. It takes a little longer than it would have had Lexa done it, but she’s both amazed and proud of the quick study that Clarke is. When they return they find that Nyko has made them up sleeping quarters in front of the fireplace. That night they just lay together, holding one another, looking into each other's eyes, feeling content with the way they fit together. They fall asleep holding one another, they fall asleep feeling both loved and in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys let me know what you thought of this chapter and any ideas/suggestions for further chapters. I have a few vague ideas of what I want to happen in the next chapter (where yes they will actually have sex and I'm planning for Lexa to also meet Abby) it might take a bit longer to upload the next chapter because school's starting again tomorrow so I'll be a little busy with that. Sorry, this took so long to upload but I wanted to make it a decent length and there is quite a lot of description in it that I hope you enjoy :)


	4. As one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa cement their bond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, sorry this took so long to upload, it's actually been more difficult to write (hopefully) good smut than I previously thought and I've been having a fair bit of writer's block with it. There is a fair bit of Trigedasieng in this chapter so here's a translator link again (http://lingojam.com/Trigedasleng-Slakgedakru) some of it may be wrong because I had to piece some words together from phrases due to not being able to find a direct translation for some words, so I'm sorry for any mistakes. This chapter is a bit shorter than the others, purely because I've taken so long to upload and I wanted to give you guys something, the next chapter I've got the basic plan for and wrote some of it on notes awhile back, so I expect that to take less time to upload. After the next chapter, however, I will probably be taking a short break as next week is my last week of school before exams which I have to study for, unfortunately; so if I don't upload that's why. But I will try. At this point, I'm thinking there may only be 3 maybe 4 more chapters left to this story but we'll see. As always I hope you enjoy and I look forward to your feedback. :)

In the days that followed they spent as much time together as they could, seeking contact where they could; holding hands and holding each other in their arms when they were alone. During Clarke's lessons with Nyko Lexa would loiter around finding things to keep herself busy and stay near Clarke, she’d read under a tree or in the shade in full view of Clarke so that they could both see each other. When it was Lexa’s turn to teach her they'd go over combat skills (originally it was a ploy to be close to Clarke, to hold her and be able to touch her, but Lexa soon turned the lessons serious when it became clear that Clarke's skills in the area were severely lacking) they'd turn and go for runs in the forest, all the while Lexa was teaching Clarke small things about being a wolf. At night they'd go back to a small cave where Lexa had taken up residents and sleep curled into one another. It had been perfect. Clarke was gaining control over her new abilities faster and more expertly than Lexa had expected of a turned person. She's brimming with pride over Clarke but she's also afraid of how well Clarke was doing, because the more she mastered her new found abilities the faster she was able to go home and leave Lexa; the thought sent pangs of pain rippling through her body, her wolf crying out at the thought, she banished it from her mind - deciding to deal with it if or when the time came.

They fell into a rhythm, settling comfortably into it. Occasional Lexa would have to go and deal with Polis business but she usually returned unfazed by it, or if she were she never let on, until one day when she had to leave their lesson early to deal with a messenger that had come to Nyko’s home; she’d gone around mid-day and had been gone for hours, the sun had long since set when she returned to her and Clarke’s hide away. Clarke heard her approach and sent out her greeting through their wolf bond “Hey babe, did you have a good day?” 

Lexa didn’t reply to her so she spoke out loud, “Babe?”

When Lexa didn’t reply again Clarke looked up at her as she entered, she could see from her demeanour that something was wrong, she went to her side, intertwining their hands together, squeezing letting Lexa know that she was there for her no matter what it was.

They stood by the entrance to the cave in suspended silence, the cold seeping through Lexa’s thin clothing making her shiver. But Lexa barely noticed, her eyes held a faraway look, like she was only with Clarke in body but not spirit, as she began to shake further Clarke grew concerned and led the numb warrior over to the fire and the furs that sat in front of it, slowly and softly applying pressure to Lexa’s shoulders so that she’d sit down, she did so without any resistance, following Clarke’s leading movements. Clarke sat nuzzled into her side, wrapping one arm around her waist and keeping her other hand intertwined with Lexa’s, offering silent comfort and support. Lexa’s only movement was to place her hand over that which was wrapped around her mid-section.

They sat there watching the flames dance in the otherwise darkened space in silence, Clarke waiting for Lexa to speak first, allowing her the time to compose her thoughts. As she waited she watched the flames as they reached for the heavens, fighting one another for the chance to rise up and fly free into the sky, being snuffed out before they could long be free of the flame that danced and taught the embers as they fell back. Clarke began to think that Lexa wasn’t going to speak at all, sleep beginning to claim her as the rhythmic dancing of the flames calmed her racing mind. As her eyelids flutter and her grip around Lexa’s waist and hand slacken Lexa speaks in a whisper, as though the words so terrible that she doesn’t dare give them life with more volume, “Your mother wants you home.” she simply states, however, her tone tells Clarke that there’s more that she’s not saying, and she’s being slowly drawn out of her sleep like fog.

“That doesn’t explain your mood. What aren’t you telling me Lexa?” 

Clarke could feel Lexa’s exhale, her voice shaky when she finally spoke again, quieter than the first time, Clarke almost missing what she said, “Because you’ve been gone so long she believes that you should be heal enough to have returned home; she believes that we are holding you against your will, she’s threatened war if you are not returned home tomorrow.” 

Clarke is stunned by what Lexa is saying, she can’t believe it, war? Her mother was threatening war? Clarke didn’t know how to respond, she just sat there numb by the prospect of a war being started over her. Shifting from her placed nuzzled into Lexa’s side she sat up and sat across from Lexa, looking down at her hands before speaking, “Then I will return home tomorrow.” her voice had a mixed of pain and excitement in it, and the former confused Lexa.

“Do you not wish to return home Clarke?”

“It doesn’t matter what I want Lexa I must, I have a duty to my people - and to yours - I can’t let another war begin. Besides, I’ve neglected my duty long enough by being here.” Whilst talking about being here her face lit up at the memories that flew through her mind, she had been happy whilst here, something she knew she didn’t deserve. 

And as though Lexa could read her mind she stated as much, “But you’ve been happy since you’ve been here Clarke.” At having someone else say it Clarke looked guilty, “You deserve to be happy Clarke, no matter what's happened in the past.” Clarke just looked down at her hands, unable to meet the bright green eyes that bore into her soul.

“Do you… Do you….” she sighed “Nevermind.” 

“What is it Clarke?” 

“It doesn’t matter, forget I said anything.” 

“Clarke.” Lexa reached for her chin, lifting her face up to meet her own, green eyes pleading with her to share what she’d been about to.

With a large sigh Clarke conceded, “Do you ever wish for something different? Something different than the life we’ve been given? Something that is more than duty, more than our people? Don’t you ever wish to be free?” She looked away expecting Lexa not to understand her doubts and reservations, but she did understand - she too had had these thoughts when she first found out she was a night blood, her life was either destined to end at the conclave, or to rule over her people until her death; either prospect alarming to a young child. 

She turned her head to look at the flames dance before she responded. “I use to have these thoughts when I was younger, I would see other children with their families longed to have that, to be carefree, and be with my mother and father.” she paused, eyes off in a distant memory of the past, “But Anaya consoled me, she told me that ‘everything happens for a reason, the universe has a plan for us, and though we may not see it, or appreciate it at the time, there is a plan. The universe may not always give us what we want, but it will inevitably give us what we need, we just have to be willing to accept it when it does.’” 

“She sounds like a wonderful person.”

“She was.” 

Silence lingered between them for a minute while Lexa bowed her head slightly and paid respect to her fallen mentor and friend, Clarke respecting what she had to do.

After Lexa looked up at her again Clarke asked her a question. “But how can there be a purpose in so much bad? Why was I created to be free just to remain static?” 

Lexa looked thoughtful, collecting her response, beginning slowly, unsure of herself, “Everything is for a reason. Had you not been a leader you wouldn’t have sought the solace of a lone hunt, and we may never have met.” She paused contemplating if she should continue, in the end she gave in to her wolf's encouragement to continue, “I’ve always done my duty, and done it well-” Clarke smirked at her candidacy at her skills as a leader “-it was my purpose, why I couldn’t have a family, why I became Heda-” Clarke was nodding, her reasoning made sense, but Lexa hadn’t finished “-I thought that, until I meet you.”

Clarke is taken back, Lexa was saying that the universe's purpose for her being Commander - for her being Heda - was so that she could meet Clarke. Lexa grew nervous when Clarke didn’t reply, rambling out her explanation for her thinking, “Had I never become Heda, nor you the leader of your people we could have never meet, and meeting you Clarke, it has made me feel the most alive that I’ve ever felt. I’ve never felt fear when rushing into battle, my heart rate has never raced faster than when I am in your presence - meeting you, being with you - that is what the universe has determined I need, you.” 

Clarke can’t believe what she’s hearing, Lexa is being so open with her - she's not closing off her emotions as she usually does, she’s being completely open, she’s completely exposed and Clarke knows that it is not something that the warrior is accustomed to feeling. 

Lexa looks like she’s about to shut down again when Clarke speaks, “My people have never given much thought to what the universe wants for us, but being with you… it has made me feel the freest I’ve felt in my entire life. You’ve made me feel things I thought I’d never experience.” She pauses taking a long shaky breath before looking deep into soft pools of green, exposed, she moves closer to Lexa, their faces centimeters apart, “I love you Lexa” she whispers, and Lexa sucks in a deep unexpected breath, holding it, “I love you more than words can describe, I love the way you laugh when you think no one is listening, I love you small smirks when you get your way, the way you care for everyone around you - even if they’re a stranger, I love the way your brow creases when you don’t understand something - there are so many things I love about you, that I can’t even describe how it feels.” 

Lexa doesn’t know how she can express her love for this girl, this girl that flew into her life so unexpectedly, this girl who challenges, questions, and pushes her, who makes her smile uncontrollably, this girl who makes her want to get up every day and live life. She doesn’t know how to express all of the emotions that she is feeling in words, instead, she closes the small gap between them and kisses Clarke, hoping that all that she feels is translated in that kiss. 

It’s a different kiss that the ones they’ve shared in the past; it’s not slow and soft, or rushed with lust… She can’t describe it other than perfect, she and Clarke moulded into one being, their lips worked against each others, hungry for more - yet content - their mouths opened for one another, allowing the other to explore inside. Hands flying to Clarke’s face and the nape of her neck pulling her impossibly closer. Clarke bites Lexa’s lower lip smiling against her lips at her need for further contact. 

When the two break apart both are breathless, foreheads resting on one another's, eyes locked while they try to steady their shaky breaths. “I love you” Lexa breaths “More than words can say.”

Clarke smiles, “I know.” she moves her head, turning so that she can kiss Lexa without bumping their noses together, pulling away she says, “I feel the same for you.” 

Lexa smiles against Clarke's lips, lightly grazing her tongue with her teeth when it reenters her mouth, exciting a moan from Clarke. Clarke slowly uncrosses her legs and moves them underneath herself, resting on the tips of her toes, before slowly rising, her thighs becoming straight, she uses her new height advantage to slowly push Lexa backwards, gently lowering her onto her back against the furs on the floor. She lowers herself slowly on Lexa, slowly and carefully putting her weight on Lexa, but leaving enough space and enough of her weight off so that she could push Clarke away if she wanted to, however, she wrapped her arms around Clarke’s waist and jerked her so that she was completely on top of her, resting the entirety of her weight on her. 

Lexa found the sensation of Clarke’s weight on top of her oddly comforting; they remained like the lips locked for a moment before Lexa wrapped her legs around Clarke’s hips and rolled them so that she was now the one on top. Clarke smiled against her lips, “You don’t like giving up control for long do you?” she asked before rolling them over again so that she was back on top.

“Neither do you it seems.” Lexa replied breathless, releasing the grip of her legs from Clarke’s hips, placing one leg in between Clarke’s thighs. She moved her hands so that they rested them her hips, sliding down Clarke’s curves. Before she had a chance to flip them over again Clarke grabbed her hands, pinning them above her head; to which Lexa’s only response was the rase of an eyebrow. Clarke moved to kiss her, Lexa completely at her mercy. 

As their kiss deepened Clarke began to grind on Lexa’s moving leg, both moaning into each other’s mouth. They soon were swept up in a haze of lust, Clarke realising Lexa’s hand from her hold in the heat of their deepening kiss, Lexa’s now free hands gripping the hem of Clarke’s shirt pulling it carelessly up her body, her own rising from the ground as they continued to kiss despite her pulling the shirt up and over Clarke’s head, tossing it to the side. Clarke’s greedy hands moving to Lexa’s shirt, giving it the same fate her own received, carelessly tossing it to the side. Her hands move down Lexa’s body from her face, cupping both sides of her face before sliding down her neck, then down to the sides of her torso, sliding down feeling her curves, resting on her taught contracting stomach, feeling the powerful muscles they lay underneath. 

Clarke’s mouth follows the path her hands took, trailing feather-light kisses along Lexa’s jaw before going down her neck and torso, slowly pushing her back down as she gets further down her body. When she reaches where her hands are rested she moves the to grip Lexa’s hips, squeezing gently causing Lexa to whine. Clarke places kisses across from one hip to another, all the while Lexa shifts beneath her. 

“Clarke…” she breaths “Please.”

Clarke stops her trail of kisses to look up at Lexa, causing her to whine in protest, “Please what my love? Do you want me to stop?” Clarke asks playfully, however when she’s meet with Lexa’s fiery gaze set alight by hunger she turns serious.

“I need you, Clarke, I need to be one with you.” 

Clarke looks into vulnerable green eyes and moves to kiss Lexa’s mouth, giving her the contact she craves. When she kisses back down Lexa’s body again she kisses harder, leaving marks. This time she doesn’t avoid Lexa’s breasts, she pulls up her bra tossing it into the growing pile of clothes. She kisses the skin of Lexa’s breasts, making sure that she claims every inch of her, moving from the left breast to the right then back again. She can’t help by palm the breast she isn’t working with her mouth, her lips soon taking Lexa’s nipple in her mouth, her hand following suit with the other nipple, rolling it between her thumb and forefinger while she sucks and gently grazes the other with her teeth. 

Lexa, eyes closed, is moaning loudly with Clarke’s treatment of her nipples, arching her back and girding her hips against Clarke’s. She is so close and Clarke has barely touched her. Clarke swaps nipples giving the other some mouth attention, as she does her right-hand snakes down Lexa’s stomach to the waistband of her pants. Clarke stops, causing Lexa to open her eyes, gaze landing on her, she was seeking permission before continuing, something which Lexa grants eagerly, leaving Clarke with a smug smirk on her face.

Clarke’s hand pushed below the waistband on Lexa’s pants, slowly going further down, Clarke can feel the heat coming off of Lexa’s vagina and can feel the wet patch that she’s left on her clothing, but she was completely unprepared for how wet Lexa was when she slipped a finger into her entrance; the unexpectedness of it causing Lexa to gasp, moaning “Clarke” lightly, breathlessly.

“God Lexa.” Clarke coos against Lexa’s lips. Clarke takes her hand out of the waistband of Lexa’s pants, earning her a growl from the warrior below her, she chuckles “Chill babe, I’m just getting into a more comfortable position.” 

Lexa does have the decency to look a bit sheepish at her outburst, “My apologies, it's harder to control my wolf with all the… distraction.”

“Oh, well if you’d like I could stop.” Clarke teases

“NO!” Lexa all but growls at her, “No, please Clarke.”

“Are you saying that your wolf wants me Lexa?”

She smiles as red creeps through her cheeks, igniting her face and setting it alight, “Not just her.”

Clarke lets out a breathless laugh that is also a sigh, “Good, I wouldn’t want to be the only one.” she says, a mischievous glint dancing around in her eyes. Her hands had found their way to Lexa’s hips, fingers resting hooked in the waistband of her pants, Clarke gives a soft but strong jerk, pulling them down slightly, Lexa lifts her hips so that Clarke can continue with little resistance. Her pants discarded on the growing pile of their clothing.

Clarke kisses down her body once more, however, this time it is more rushed, less teasing, as she moved to her final goal. She kissed Lexa’s hips and along the inside of her thighs before placing feather light kisses on the top of Lexa’s vagina. She looked up as Lexa, seeking her permission before continuing. The pleading look and slight nod that Lexa gave her was all the encouragement she needed. She moved her head down towards Lexa’s entrance, placing light kisses on her outer lips before licking Lexa’s slit. She pressed her tongue to Lexa’s clit and moved it in slow circles, tasting Lexa’s juices. She tasted of musk, there was a tang of salt, and that thing that was uniquely Lexa, Clarke was enthralled, captured by the taste of her. She wanted more.

Lexa let out a sigh, “ahh, Clarke. Kyon” *keep going*

Clarke smiled at Lexa’s slip into Trigedasleng, it meant that she wasn’t concentrating enough to speak to her in English, however, Clarke had spent enough time around Lexa and Nyko this past few weeks to know what Lexa had said, and obliged by renewing her efforts. She applied more pressure to Lexa’s clit as her tongue moved in rapid circles. Lexa moaned at the sensation. Clarke moved her fingers to Lexa’s wetting entrance, rubbing her middle and index fingers up and down, lubricating them with Lexa’s cum before pressing her index finger into Lexa. She moved her finger slowly in and out at first, letting Lexa get use to the sensation, whilst still lapping at her juices with her mouth. As Lexa moved and grinded her hip against Clarke’s face and had Clarke increased her speed, going deeper and harder with each thrust.

“More. Clarke, I need more.”

Clarke inserted another finger, obliging Lexa’s plea. Lexa moaned louder with the introduction of the second finger. Clarke could tell she was close, her hips were bucking against Clarke more fearcling now and her back arching off the ground; Clarke applied more pressure to her clit, moving her tongue as rapidly as she could manage while still fingering her. With an animalist growl that was also a moan Lexa came, exploding on Clarke’s hand and mouth. Clarke continued to move her hand and tongue, helping Lexa ride out her orgamsum, slowly desceasing her speed, the further down Lexa came from her high. 

When Clarke stopped Lexa was panting trying to get her breath back. Clarke moved up Lexa’s body, her partially clothed body resting on Lexa’s naked one. Her lips found Lexa’s and took them in a deep kiss, Lexa moaned at the taste of herself on Clarke’s lips, she tried to deepen the kiss but Clarke stopped her by biting her lip and tugging on it gently as she pulled away, “That good huh?” Clarke laughed looking into Lexa’s still dilated pupils.

“No,” she said, “It was much better.” 

Clarke smiled, pleased with herself. Lexa’s hands moved up and down Clarke’s back moving from her hips where they rested on the bottom of her bra, “You’re a little over dressed, though.” Lexa said, a wicked smile playing on her lips, “I think we ought to remedy that.” 

Lexa took Clarke’s mouth in a deep heated kiss, her hands moving to undo the clasp of Clarke’s bra, pulling the straps down her arms and tossing the bra to the side; the only thing between them now were Clarke’s pants. Lexa’s hands moved from Clarke’s shoulders down her arms to her chest. She let her fingers trail lazily down Clarke’s torso to her jeans, unbuttoning them in a swift motion. She slowly moved her hand in between the fabric and Clarke’s skin, sinking below the waistband of her pants, her hand moved to cup Clarke’s sex over her underwear, her fingers teasing Clarke’s entrance through the thin fabric. Lexa could feel how wet Clarke was, how ready she was, and she added more pressure to her probing fingers - exciting a moan from Clarke.

“Lexa… Please. Stop teasing me. I need you, I need this.” At this point Clarke wasn’t above begging, she was horny and need to feel Lexa inside her, lapping at her wetness.

“bilaik Yu hedon, hedplei Clarke.” *As you command Clarke* Lexa whispered into her ear, lightly tugging on her earlobe before trailing kisses down her neck. Removing her hand from Clarke’s pants Lexa pushed the garments down Clarke’s hips, Clarke wiggling eagerly; trying to help speed the process along. 

“Clarke stay still.” Lexa commanded gently, causing Clarke to cease her movements while Lexa sat up, enveloping her in a hug whilst pushing her pants down her thighs, Clarke kicking them swiftly off.

Lexa’s hand caressed its way back up Clarke’s thigh, kneading as it went. When she reached Clarke’s inner thighs she could feel the heat radiating off of her now bear vagina. Her hand moved slowly, methodically to wards Clarke’s entrance - earning her a small gruff of protest from Clarke at her slow actions. She cupped Clarke’s vagina as she’d done before, only now without the thin cloth of Clarke’s underwear Lexa could feel her arousal on her fingers as it dripped from Clarke in anticipation.

Lexa moved her hand slowly at first, cupping then uncupping Clarke, moving the palm of her hand to increase and decrease pressure slightly. Clarke moaned, closing her eyes and thrusting her hips into Lexa’s hand and grinding against it, trying to get faster movement and more friction. 

Lexa added more speed until Clarke was rocking her hips against her, head lolling to the side slightly, moaning as she tried to get Lexa to enter her, “Lexa - please. I need to feel you. Ai gaf in, gafen Yu inside Ai.” Clarke pleaded. *I need you inside me* 

Lexa’s answer came with her free hand moving to cup Clarke’s ass, her mouth capturing hers in a deep unbridled kiss and the slipping of her index finger into Clarke’s wet opening, sliding inside with little resistance. Clarke’s eyes flew open as Lexa’s finger thrust into her, moaning into Lexa’s mouth; something Lexa took full advantage of, thrusting her tongue into Clarke’s mouth.

Clarke thrust harder against Lexa’s hand now that she had something to grind against, Lexa’s own thrusts meet the speed of Clarke’s. Clarke moaned louder and louder, climbing on her way to orgasm. Lexa added another finger adding to pleasure that was consuming Clarke’s senses. 

Lexa broke their mouths apart, kissing fiercely down Clarke’s neck - she was sure she was leaving marks on Clarke’s fair complexion but she couldn’t bring herself to stop, everyone would know that she was Lexa’s now. It was all she could think “Everyone will know that you are mine.”. 

To Lexa’s surprise Clarke breathed out a breathless “yes” implying that she’d spoken through their bond. 

Lexa’s free hand moved from Clarke’s ass, trailing along the side of her body up to her breast, cupping and moving gently over the soft skin, grazing her nipple, making Clarke go wild. Her fingers drifted around the nipple, lightly touching it before she pinched it between her thumb and forefinger, turning and twisting the sensitive skin slightly. All the while the thrusts of her hand never slowing, adding a third finger when she grabbed Clarke’s nipple. Clarke faulted, stopping her movements against Lexa’s hand as she took in all the sensations Lexa was assaulting her body with.

Clarke let out a growl that was part moan part scream, “Yes, Lexa! Ahhh, please…. Ahhh” Losing the ability to speak Clarke resumed the grinding of her hips against Lexa’s hand with renewed vigour. Lexa kissed back up her path on Clarke’s neck till she got to her ear, nipping her earlobe once more with her teeth and tugging lightly. Clarke moaned loudly for Lexa, “mmmh I’m so close Lexa, ahhh don’t stop”. 

It turned Lexa on how close Clarke was, Lexa only let go of Clarke’s earlobe when she was ready to speak, “Cum for me Clarke.” It was a quite demand that held now power or authority, except that of a lover. 

Clarke bent her head down into the crook of Lexa’s neck, biting hard to stop herself from screaming as she came, grinding on Lexa’s hand, her nipple being firmly tugged and played with. Lexa helped Clarke through her shattering orgasm, rocking her hand and moving her fingers inside Clarke at an ever slowing rate, helping Clarke slowly come down from ecstasy. 

Clarke finally released Lexa from her mouth, her head collapsing buried in her neck, her body falling gracelessly onto Lexa’s, no longer holding any of her weight. 

Lexa placed gentle loving kisses on Clarke's shoulders and upper arms, kissing any skin she could reach without moving Clarke. Her hand lazily trailed up and down the length of Clarke’s back, soothing her. When Clarke’s breathing slowed, the rise and fall of her back becoming normalised Lexa gently nudged her to raise her body off of her slightly. Clarke raised her lips to Lexa’s ear, 

“That was amazing, Mochof my hod in, hodnes.” *Thank you, my love* Lexa faltered at Clarke’s use of Trigedasleng, her pronunciation a little off, but rather well spoken.

“Yu're Monin. eni gou my hod in, hodnes.” *You're welcome, anytime my love.* 

Clarke shifted herself, dragging her upper body against Lexa’s, moving to straddle her. Lexa lay back against the furs below her, marveling at the beautiful naked woman above her. How her hair fell in a veil around her face, a beautiful golden curtain that brushed Lexa’s face when she bent down to kiss her, her eyes that shone into Lexa’s, boring their way into her soul and heart, connecting with her wolf and making her cry out for further contact. They swell of her breasts, the curves of her hips and thighs, strong and perfect. Everything about Clarke was perfect to her. This person that could both excite and arouse her but also terrified her at the same time; this person that she wanted to call hers.

Gripping Clarke’s hips Lexa pulled them down against her own, holding Clarke against her - increasing their skin to skin contact as much as she could. Clarke took the hint and lean back down against Lexa, placing their chests against one another's; faces mere inches from one another’s. However, neither moved to close the gap, this wasn’t that kind of moment. Lexa looked into Clarke’s eyes, seeing the stars and the sky within them, seeing the world, seeing her future. 

She spoke through their bond “Ai na huk yu op kom deimeika, natshana, en skaifaya. beja laik ain.” *I would give you the sun, moon, and stars. Please be mine* 

Clarke smiled down at her, “Ai laik kom nau.” *I already am* 

Clarke moved down to seal their words with a kiss, a soft kiss conveying how much she cared for Lexa. She shifted so that she was laying beside her on the furs, wrapping her limbs around her, pulling her close; as to make sure this is all real. 

After a moment of comfortable silence, watching Lexa’s chest rise and fall, drifting off to the rhythmic motion of it Clarke spoke up before she slipped into the oblivion of sleep, “You’ve captured my heart, body and soul in such a short time.” she paused, “I don’t know what I’d do now without you Lexa; I can’t picture my life without you in it.”

Lexa was so gripped by what Clarke was saying, she had to reassure her that she was in this, that she felt the same. “You won’t ever have to, I won’t ever leave you.” 

With a content sigh Clarke gripped tighter onto Lexa, falling into a deep peaceful sleep while spooning the woman she loved so deeply she didn’t know it was real.


	5. Meeting the family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke returns home, Lexa and Abby meet and it's an action-packed introduction. Clexa love haha Lincoln and Octavia 'meet', an introduction of some more characters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I know, I am literal human scum, I am sorry it has taken me so long to update, a combination of writer's block, exams, injuries and natural disasters has made me unable/unwilling to write for the past couple of weeks. I hope you enjoy the chapter as always, any mistakes let me know and any feedback is always appreciated and taken into consideration as long as it is constructive :) To anyone that lives in America and reads this fic I'm sorry that you were left with two rather shitty candidates and that the worse of the two got elected, to anyone here at home in New Zealand, I hope that you and anyone you know are ok after the earthquake and enjoy your break from exams and study ;) I know I did haha. Also, I've just made a 'fan page' Tumblr, so if any of ya have question or anything you want to ask or anything you want to say that you can't here then you can hit me up there http://night-bloom6.tumblr.com/

Clarke awoke the next morning to the sound of birds greeting the rising sun with their songs, enticing it to rise above the horizon and bathe the ground in its warm glow. She felt strong arms around her midsection, hands resting softly and limply on her back, she looked up into Lexa’s face and saw the soft slackness of sleep of her face, her brow free of the deep crests that plague it when she's wakes, her face showing its young age; showing the young girl that hides underneath the fierce leader of the 12 Clans. Clarke nuzzles into Lexa, seeking more of the warmth that her body provides, her head resting the the crook of Lexa’s neck underneath her chin, her own arms wrapping tighter around Lexa’s body, pulling it impossibly closer to her, as though if she were to slacken her hold she’d slip away - protecting this young, unburdened side of Lexa from the dangers that the world has to offer, protecting her so that she can remain at peace for a few moments more. 

 

Clarke hears Lexa chuckle once she pulls her closer, “Good morning little wolf.” 

 

Clarke holds her breath, Lexa just called her ‘little wolf’, Lexa just gave her the fucken cutest nickname, “Good morning Heda.” she breathes out shakily, “How was your night, did you sleep well?” she asks while moving her mouth to press against her neck, lifting her head away slightly so that she a kiss the length of her neck.

 

Lexa gulps as Clarke moves from under her chin down the base of her collarbone, leaving soft lazy kisses in her wake, “My night was… Productive.” She lets a light smile creep at the sides of her lips, tugging them up, “I slept very well, thank you.” her voice breaks and her breath is shaky, she can’t believe the effect that Clarke has on her.

 

Clarke smiles against her skin, “You sound unsure.” she says playfully, “Perhaps I should remind you just how ‘productive’ we were last night.” As Clarke is about to start kissing Lexa’s neck again she moves, capturing Clarke’s mouth with her own, cupping her face with both hands and envelops her in a deep loving kiss.

 

They break apart, resting against each other's foreheads as they pant trying to regain their breaths. Both of their eyes are closed when Clarke speaks, “That was one helluva kiss babe-” she paused, taking a moment, opening her eyes she placed a delicate shadow kiss on Lexa’s lips, “-I love you too.” 

 

Lexa opens her eyes, looking into the impossibly bright electric blue spears that stare back at her, “Ai tombom en keryon leron gon Yu, ai hodnes, kyon emo klir kom yun.” *My heart and soul belong to you, my love, keep them safe with yours.*

 

Clarke stared back at Lexa with love and amazement, how was it that she could possibly love her even more than she already did? She wasn’t sure, but she knew that she did. With a lump in her voice she spoke, “Feva en otaim, gon kom we hanch taim kom we Yu are ain en Ai laik yun.” *Forever and always, for as long as you are mine and I am yours.*

 

Lexa kissed her with a feverish passion that was stoked by the flames of their love for one another, turning the kiss deep, heated, lustful. Arms wrapped around one another seeking to be closer, to become one. 

 

In that moment there was no doubt that they loved each other more than the people from the myths and fables of the past, that their destinies and souls were intertwined, designed to collide long before they were alive. Their love transcended the realms and laws of the world, it was bound by the magic of fate and destiny; and as such, in that moment when they both felt their love pouring out of their every pore and receiving the love from the other, their bond was sealed. 

 

The bond of true mates, the colliding of two halves of a soul to form one, the broken pieces of a exploded star brought back together and made whole again by the explosion of light that separated them so long ago. 

 

In that moment they both knew that it wasn’t the first time a pair made love that sealed their bond, it was when they both felt all-consuming love for one another when they felt whole - as one - that is when they became true mates when they became one. 

 

//

 

Lexa and Clarke had to delay their journey to Arkadia on account that they were glowing after their lovemaking that morning, they hadn’t realised at first, not until they separated to get dressed and Clarke caught her reflection in the basin of water. 

 

“Lexaaa.” her voice carried the name in an unsure and concerned toned through the cave, instantly causing the girl to look up from where she’d been sorting out their clothing. She heard Lexa gasp when her eyes landed on her.

 

“Clarke” she managed to get out through a lump in her throat before letting out a purr that was so soft and comforting that made Clarke feel so safe and warm that she wanted to climb into it and never leave; she whined as she turned to face Lexa. When her eyes fell on Lexa she could see the faint glow surrounding her that she saw in her reflection, she let out a primal growl, moving to Lexa, stopping just in front of her. Lexa let out a responding whimper to Clarke’s growl, nuzzling into her neck, seeking contact. Clarke moved her own head into the nape of Lexa’s neck, burying her face into the pools of brown curls, drowning in Lexa’s scent with traces of her own. Now it was Lexa’s turn to growl, biting into the soft skin between Clarke’s shoulder and neck both seeing and smelling her claim on the girl. 

 

“Lexa, what does the light mean?” Clarke husks out, throat dry with arousal and want. 

 

Lexa stiffens and moves away from Clarke’s neck, she cautiously looks into her eyes, her own filled with guilt and remorse “I’m sorry Clarke, it means we are bonded… It mean’s we’re true mates.” Lexa looks so ashamed of herself, “I didn’t mean to take that choice away from you, I didn’t mean to stake my claim on you.” 

 

Clarke almosts laughs at Lexa but she doesn’t because she can see how stricken Lexa is by not ‘allowing Clarke the choice’, how could she think that Clarke didn’t want this?

 

“Lexa, you didn’t take my choice from me. I felt it last night, I didn’t know what it was exactly but I wanted it, I wanted to become one with you. All I could feel was how in love with you I was and how much I wanted you to be mine and for me to be yours forever.” she smiled softly into wide green eyes, tilting her head slightly so that they eyes were level, “I have never wanted anything more in my life.” 

 

Lexa could see how earnest Clarke was and smiled sweetly at her, “Good. I feel the same about you Clarke, now and then.” 

 

Clarke lets out a growl that sends shivers down Lexa’s spine, to which she reciprocated with an equally shiver-inducing growl of her own, both acknowledging their claim on the other.

 

//

 

Arkadia looms on the horizon around mid-day. Lexa, Clarke, and Lincoln had made the trip in a comfortable silence, Lexa and Clarke communicating through the psychic link that being wolves provides them, Lincoln mostly keeping to himself, riding behind the two, staying close enough so that if his Heda was in danger or needed something he could provide it but far enough away as to not be a nuisance. Clarke wasn’t really sure why Lincoln accompanied them, she didn’t see his purpose on this venture - he’d arrived at Nyko’s the night previous having been the one to deliver Abby’s declaration of war if Clarke wasn’t ‘returned’ home - but Clarke didn’t know why he didn’t just go home, or stay with Nyko they were friends as far as she could tell. 

 

She stewed in her thoughts on Lincoln's presents when Lexa’s sweet soothing voice entered her mind, “What troubles you, my love?” 

 

Clarke is startled out of her thoughts and almost falls off her horse, she would have had it not been for her new found abilities. Nevertheless, Lexa is right there, a hand on Clarke’s lower back stabilising her in the saddle. 

 

“Nothing. I was just thinking.”

 

“What of?”

 

Clarke pauses, unsure if she should voice her doubt at Lincoln’s presence. She doesn’t want Lexa to think that she’s questioning her decisions, but she kinda is. She takes a deep breath before she replies, steadying herself for a potentially negative response.

 

“Why is Lincoln with us?” She sends a quick sideways glance at Lexa, trying to gauge her reaction to the question. What she finds is not anger, but surprise, she obviously hadn’t been expecting that to be what Clarke was thinking about. Her brow creases before she responds sounding unsure of herself.

 

“I asked him to come with us. I was unsure how long you wished to stay at Arkadia and I couldn’t ask Nyko to come and leave Trikru without their most skilled and accessible healer.” she paused and Clarke waited for her to continue, “I thought it would be best to bring Lincoln along so that you could continue both your healers and leadership training whilst we remain in Arkadia.” 

 

Clarke’s brows rose and knitted together in surprise, Lexa was going to stay in Arkadia with her? Lexa saw Clarke’s surprise and began to ramble.

 

“If you do not wish to continue your training that is fine also, I can send Lincoln home, however, I would advise that you do continue-”

 

Clarke cut her off, “No, I think that’s a really good idea babe. I just…” She paused collecting her thoughts, “I thought I’d come back show my mother I was fine and then leave with you again. I hadn’t even thought of staying, let alone you staying with me.” 

 

“I can escort you to your camp and leave if you’d like.” Lexa rush's in with, swallowing over a primal growl that grows in her throat during the last part of her statement, voice conveying her worry at having overstepped Clarke’s bounds and her want to never let Clarke out of her sight.

 

Clarke looks to her, love and humour in her eyes, “Don’t you dear, we’re in this together. I don’t ever want to be without you, Lexa.” Her eyes soften the longer she looks into Lexa’s, hers doing the same, “I want you to meet my people, my friends, my mum.” she lets out a small sighed laugh, “Besides, I need someone to stop my mum from killing me when I tell her I’m both a werewolf and I’ve bonded to the leader of the grounders.” Though she joked about it, Clarke really was concerned about how her mother would react to the news, something Lexa was not only able to see, but also feel.

 

“Clarke. You don’t need to tell your mother either of those things… Not yet, not until you’re ready.” 

 

Clarke smiled at her, relief flooding her at Lexa’s acceptance of her need for time, “Thank you, Lexa, I know that isn’t easy for you.” 

 

“It’s easy because it is what you want,” she said, a morsel of sadness clouding her words. Clarke looked at her, studying her; from her words and body language alone you wouldn’t be able to tell that she was upset by Clarke wanting to wait to tell her mother of the changes that have occurred since they last saw one another, but Clarke could feel it, feel Lexa’s sadness and her small amount of hurt at Clarke’s reluctance to do so.

 

“It has nothing to do with you Lexa, I want them to know we’re together, my reluctance to announce that was more for your sake.”

 

“My sake?” 

 

“Yes. I wasn’t sure what grounder traditions were or how your people would react to a sky person claiming their commander, I didn’t want word to spread to your people before you could tell them yourself, assuming that you want to tell them at all of course.” She away from Lexa as she’d began rambling, stopping when she felt Lexa’s knee nudging her own, she’d brought her horse right next to Clarke’s and was quietly purring with a slight growl, causing Clarke’s insides to melt and her heart to flutter. It was so gentle, yet so strong and commanding.

 

“I want everyone to know that you are mine and I am your’s Clarke.” Clarke felt her cheeks redden and a faint tug at her lips, a small satisfied smile creeping onto them, but when she looked up at Lexa a full blown smile exploded across her face, mirrored my Lexa’s own dazzling smile.

 

“Ok then. We’ll tell them.” she smiled brighter still at seeing the pride and joy that played over Lexa’s features as she promised to tell her people - her family and friends - that she is Heda’s and Heda is hers. “But we can’t tell them about the wolf thing, not yet.” Clarke rushed out, looking to make sure she hadn’t blurted it out loud instead of through the bound.

 

“Kom op taim ai hod in. When you’re ready.” *In time my love* Clarke nodded, hiding a slight blush; Lexa could feel how much it affected Clarke for her to have not pushed her into having to tell her people about them as a couple or what they were - what she now was.

 

The three rode on in silence for the last proportion of their journey, Lexa and Clarke consumed by their own thoughts - however, Clarke suspected that Lexa and Lincoln were discussing what was to happen when they arrived at the camp and other strenuous details that Clarke really didn’t care about; she just had to stop her mother from following through with her stupidity of a war proclamation and convince Lexa to accept an apology. Clarke knew Lexa would - well she hoped she would - but she knew that accepting an apology with no repercussions would be seen as an act of weakness, something Lexa’s people don’t tolerate. Clarke couldn’t ask Lexa to not act just because it was her people because then Lexa could be in the firing line, however, she could ask her to be lenient. 

 

Clarke’s mind swirled with her darkening thoughts of possible punishments and her mood grew dimmer the closer they got to Arcadia. Clarke startled when she felt a hand on her shoulder, almost falling from her horse, a growl rippled through her core and the hair on her body stood on end, she could feel the shift calling her, her wolf calling to be in control - to fight off the attacker and protect them - but the soft whimper that resonated from the form next to her brought her back from the brink of turning, Lexa’s looked to her, eyes filled with shocked, concern and confusion, Clarke could see the strain her body was under to remain upright, looking over to Lincoln Clarke saw his diminished form dismounted from his horse and on the ground, neck turned up to her in a submissive gesture, Clarke realised that Lexa was resisting the command in her growl - but only just - and it was putting her under immense strain and pain to do so. 

 

Lexa’s voice came out crooked and struggled when she spoke, “Clarke. It’s me.” she looked to Clarke with pleading eyes, reaching a hand out to cup Clarke’s face, “Beja, kom op bak op gon ai.” *Please, come back to me.* Lexa’s touch and pleads calmed Clarke and made her cease her growling. Her body growing still and silent, the world immobile and deathly quiet around them - she was afraid that her hearing was gone, but how could it be when she could hear her heart rushing her pulsing blood through her veins and she was acutely aware of Lexa’s breathing and own heart rate - which both were beginning to slow and level out now that her body wasn’t under the strain of resisting the power of an Alpha, her body seemed to visibly relax. 

 

Clarke collapsed against Lexa, burying her face into the crook of Lexa’s neck, tears swelling in her eyes, falling silently as she breathed in Lexa’s scent willing it to calm her; but it only fueled her tears, “I I I… I’m...sss….soo sorr...sorry… I… I didn’t mean - ” Lexa cut off her hiccuped sobs by pulling her closer, lifting her off of her horse and into her lap, stroking her hair and running her fingers up and down the base of her spine in smooth calming motions humming the song from when Clarke first awoke with her heightened scenes those few weeks ago. 

 

Lincoln had righted himself and collected both his own and Clarke’s horses and had begun walking towards Arcadia, leave Lexa and Clarke alone to have their moment, Clarke wondered if Lexa had ordered him to or if he’d done it of his own volition, but to be honest she didn’t really care, she was just glad that he wasn’t around to witness her having a breakdown, being curled up crying on the Commander's lap like a child seeking the comfort of their mother.

 

Lexa was still rubbing calming patterns on Clarke's back when she finally spoke, “What were you thinking about Clarke?”

 

Clarke looked up at her questioningly, “Before you lost control, what were your thoughts of? I could feel it upsetting you, and it was obviously potentate enough to make you almost lose yourself.” she clarified. 

 

Clarke looked away from her soft but strong gaze down to the crook of her neck thinking of how best to word what she was thinking of before she lost control. There was a long pause before she spoke, “I… I was thinking about you… and my mum… and what the consequences of her foolish declaration would be.” She continued to keep her eyes locked on Lexa’s neck, as though if she were to move her gaze then she’d become unanchored and lost “I can’t lose either of you Lexa, and I know that retribution must be taken; that your people won’t sit idly by and allow a declaration of war to go unpunished, even if it is taken back.” Clarke was near tears now “And I can’t ask of you to do nothing because then they’d turn on you, but I can’t just leave my people either, leave my mother to suffer because of her foolish actions in trying to protect me.” She had let her tears stream freely now and was sobbing incoherently. 

 

Lexa could just make out what she was saying, “She did it for me.” repeating it over and over again until it got lost in between the skin of Lexa’s neck and the sobs choking Clarke’s throat. 

 

Lexa could do nothing but stroke Clarke’s back and try to comfort her, because she was right, Lexa couldn’t just let a threat of war go unpunished, it would show weakness to her people and leave room for dissension among them, but she didn’t want to hurt Clarke, or relations with the sky people either; she had plans to ask them to be apart of her coalition and didn’t want to do something that would ruin the peace she was trying to foster among her people and Clarke’s. 

 

When Clarke’s sobbing subsided Lexa pulled her chest away from Clarke so that she could see her face, “I have a plan ok?” she whispered, “It will both appease my people and your people will safe.” 

 

Clarke just nodded weakly, nudging back into her body seeking comfort and warmth. Lexa could sense Clarke’s wolf calling to her own through their special mate bond and called back, hugging Clarke’s form closer to her, trying to offer all of the strength and comfort she could.

 

//

 

They arrived at Arkadia not long after Clarke had composed herself. Five lone figures stood at the entrance to Arkadia, blocking the gates. Lexa, Clarke, and Lincoln dismounted their horse, Lincoln tying them off in the shade of a nearby tree, the three then walked the path up to the entrance passing newly formed plots of farming areas, people were milling around, going about their daily chores, some tending to the newly formed vegetable gardens, some off to go hunting or on scouting trips, all greeting Clarke with smiles and “welcome homes” to which Clarke would reply with a tight-lipped smile, they mostly ignored Lexa and Lincoln’s presence, only ever acknowledging it with a scowl in their direction - it is clear to Clarke that her mother had been spreading salacious rumors about her recent absence from camp, using Lexa as the villain to explain it. Clarke was tense, her muscles coiled ready to spring into action if need be, the looks her people were sending at Lexa and Lincoln only put her more on edge; nervous energy was coming off her in waves. Lexa could not only smell Clarke’s anxiety, but she could also feel and sense her nerves through their bond; the closer they got to the camp the more anxious Clarke got, Lexa started releasing calming pheromones and grabbed Clarke's hand, squeezing it to let her know that she was there and she wasn’t going anywhere, trying to calm her mate down before she did something she’d regret. When Clarke looked up to her there was a soft smile on Lexa’s lips that centred her, she moved closer to her mate, her presence and warmth calming her racing mind and soothing her nerves, cementing her into reality. When Lexa looked up from Clarke her features changed, going from those of Lexa the girl - the sweet, soft, wonderful girl Clarke loved - to the hardened more dominant features of Heda, she became older when she was Heda, more regal. Lexa transformed from a sweet village girl to the strong, fierce leader of the 12 clans in the blink of an eye - and if she were being honest, Clarke found it extremely hot; something Lexa noticed and made note of.

 

“From a ball of anxiety to turned on in mere moments. What were you thinking of Clarke?”

 

Clarke blushed, forgetting that as wolves they are able to smell changes in the pheromones someone is releasing. “The anxiety was when I was thinking of my people and my mother… the change was… was when I was thinking about you.” 

 

“Oh?” They stopped walking and Lexa turned to her, her back now to her entrance of Arkadia, “And what was it about me that turned you on, Clarke?”

 

“Well-” Clarke scoffed, “apart from your usual hot self-” she sent a side glance up at Lexa and saw she was smiling, Clarke laughed a little before continuing “when you put your Heda mask on in an instant after being Lexa, I-... I found that kinda hot.”

 

“‘Kinda hot’ huh?”

 

“Well, I definitely found it hot… as you are well aware.” She says before blushing the colour of blood against freshly fallen snow.

 

Lexa chuckles to herself a little, “Aren’t you glad we are able to talk… telepathically I believe you called it.” 

 

“Yes, I am.” Clarke paused before continuing whilst speaking out loud, “But I do find that talking out loud lends a certain weight to my words.”

 

“What do you mean my love?”

 

“That, right there. It means so much more to hear you say it out loud, as though you’re declaring it to the whole universe, not just me… when we say something out loud it just-... it just seems to mean… more.”

 

“I would declare my love for you to every living organism I could find, tell every person I meet, scream it to the stars just so they’d know that I am yours.”

 

“And that I am yours; forever and always. I love you, Lexa.”

 

“I love you too Clarke.” Lexa rested her forehead against Clarke’s “Feva, na kom laik eno.” *Forever, until the end.*

 

Clarke’s hand reached for Lexa’s face, pulling her lips down to meet hers, guiding her in a soft kiss that was sweet and soft, it was everything that they both needed in that moment. Showing their love for one another and lending their strength to each other for the upcoming challenges that they faced. They separated foreheads resting on one another's, eyes closed savouring the taste of each other, Lexa smiled, sighing lightly, “As much as I enjoyed and needed that hodens *love* perhaps it wasn’t the best way to announce our relationship to your people, or your mother.”

 

“I don’t care. If they don’t like it then they can go float themselves, you’re mine-” a small growl left Clarke’s lips as she said it “- I can kiss you when I want to.”

 

Lexa smiles down at her, the green ring in her eyes shining, pupils dilated “Yes hodens, I am yours.” Lexa gives her a small peck on the lips before straightening to look down at her, smiling she said, “Always so stubborn.” 

 

Clarke laughed, seeing the twinkle of mischief in Lexa’s eye, “You truly have no idea babe.” she said with a smile of her own before turning serious, “I suppose we should go talk to them now.”

 

“Yes.” Lexa paused, turning her head to the side and sniffing slightly, “Your mother especially seems… irritated at our delay.” Clarke laughed at Lexa’s seriousness.

 

“God I love you, Heda.”

 

“And I you.”

 

They nudged noises once more before Lexa turned so that she and Clarke were walking hand in hand towards the four figures that were staring at them, some smiling, some not so much. There were three women and two men, the first man in the middle of the group looked to be about their age, he was just taller than Lexa he has black curly hair, dark brown amber black eyes that shone when he looked at Clarke, and a humorous smile dawned his tanned features, making his eyes crinkle and shine further. On his left stood a slightly younger looking girl with long black hair that dawned similar facial features to him - except where deep brown-black eyes were hers were a grass green, her expression, one of adoration and welcome, also met Clarke, as well as a cheeky wink - these must be the Blake siblings, Bellamy and Octavia, Lexa thought. 

 

Next to her stood a girl with olive skin, black hair pulled back into a ponytail, and russet eyes, she stood slightly slanted and Lexa was unsure why until she saw the brace on the girl's leg - this must be Raven - Lexa thought, mentally checking off Clarke’s friends that she'd told her about during their time together. 

 

On Bellamy's right stood an older woman, she stood slightly in front of her younger counterparts, she had brown hair and chestnut brown eyes that shone amber but there was no mistaking it, she was Clarke’s mother, they shared similar bone structures and facial features. Abby looked on at her daughter with a mix of relief and shock, but there was another emotion, something Lexa couldn't quite pinpoint from the woman's face, so she gave a small sniff and could smell anger radiating off of her, she shifted her body so that it was slightly in front of Clarke’s while still holding her hand; Clarke looked up at her with a confused expression on her face, Lexa flared her nostrils indicating for Clarke to sniff the air, when she did realisation crossed her face and she looked at her mother, blissfully unaware that the two could quite literally smell her anger.

 

They stood in silence for a moment the four of the on the inside of the wall to Arkadia and Lincoln, Lexa, and Clarke just outside before Clarke released Lexa’s hand to go hug her friends, hugging Raven first, “No wonder you’ve been gone so long Giffen, she’s hot.” Clarke pulled away from Raven blushing slightly and trying to suppress a territorial growl, both this and Raven’s comment made Lexa snicker lightly to herself.

 

“Yeah, I’m afraid that your good looks just weren’t enough for me anymore Reyes,” Clarke said with a wink, laughing to herself when she hears a light rumble leave Lexa’s chest at her comment. 

 

She moved to hug the younger Blake, “Good to have you back princess, maybe now your mum will stop being a colossal bitch.” Clarke knew that it was meant as a joke but she could hear the truth behind Octavia’s words and was upset that her absence had made the other suffer, she looked over to Raven and knew her mother would have made her life hell for allowing Clarke to leave that morning, she made a note to talk to Raven after they’d all caught up and make sure her mother hadn’t been too hard on the girl, but unfortunately she knew her mother well and she would have made Raven’s life hell till Clarke was found… even then.

 

“It’s good to see you too O, you’re looking stronger.” 

 

The girl beamed up at her, “I’ve been training a lot since you’ve been gone, no one to play with.” she said giving Clarke a wink, again Lexa let out a small growl, Clarke was really going to have to warn her more thoroughly about her friends sexual jokes.

 

She let go of Octavia laughing and moved onto Bellamy, his smile grew wider, if at all possible, and he enveloped her in a bear hug lifting her up off of the grown making Clarke squeal at the unexpectedness of it, “It’s good to see you too Bell, now put me down!” he let out a hearty laugh whilst complying to her command.

 

“As you, command princess.” 

 

“Thank you.” she mumbled into his shoulder as he continued to hug her, when she inhaled she could smell Raven’s scent on him and looked back to her, watching her reaction to Clarke’s closeness with Bellamy, adding it to the list of things she needs to talk to Raven about later, or perhaps Bellamy.

 

He laughed, “You’re welcome, welcome home.” he said as he released his death grip on her.

 

Clarke smiled at the man she once hated and now considers a brother, glad that they had come together to protect and lead their people. She turned to the older man next to him, Kane had aged since they landed on the ground, his hair grown out and a full beard gracing his face, flecks of grey creeping throughout it, starting to grow more prominent against the jet black hair. His face had more wrinkles on it than it had on the arch, he smiles more since we’ve been on the ground, his hazel eyes shining down at Clarke as she approaches him, he reminds Clarke of her dad sometimes and it is both a comfort and a sadness.

 

She wraps her hand around his forearm before being pulled in for a hug, “Welcome back home Clarke.”

 

“Thank you, Kane, it’s nice to see you again. You’re looking more rugged than when I left.”

 

“Yes, well not shaving and sleeping in the forest will do that to you, I actually only arrived back myself-”

 

“That explains it.”

 

“Explains what?” he asked bemused.

 

“How my mother was able to threaten war with no one stopping her.” At Clarke’s comment, she sees a mix of emotions cross Kane’s features, anger, regret, sadness. Her mother clears her throat and Clarke knows she heard and didn’t appreciate her comment, she also hears the others sinker a bit, which makes her feel a bit more confident.

 

She removes herself from Kane and turns her attention to her mother, she falters before she goes to her, uncertain of what she should do. She could feel her anger and it added to Clarke’s own anger that was bubbling under the surface for the woman.

 

She moved to stand in front of her but made no move to envelop her into a hug. Both staring at one another waiting for the other to cave and speak first. Abby was the one to give in first, “I’m glad you’re home Clarke.”

 

“Yes, well threats of war will get things done rather quickly,” Clarke said, a sharp edge to her voice, her anger at the situation and her mother slowly rising to the surface.

 

“Clarke don't be like that, I did it for your own good.”

 

Clarke laughs bitterly, about to retort when she felt Lexa behind her, pressing the side of her body into her own as she intertwined their hands and fingers, claiming Clarke measurably. Clarke, trying to calm herself further before continuing, looked at Octavia and saw her gaze was fixed on something behind them, she turned her head slightly to see Lincoln stood just off to the left behind them, eyes constantly sweeping the area for threats to Heda and her mate, she then looked back at Octavia, transfixed on him, undressing him with her eyes, she let out a little laugh when she sniffed the air and could smell the change in the other girls pheromones, gaining her the attention of Lincoln who followed her gaze to Octavia, where he too became transfixed, looking at her as though she were the sunrise and he was seeing it for the first time. He began moving toward her, before remembering his purpose for being here - to serve Heda and teach Clarke - and regaining his composure returned to his task of looking for threats, occasionally sending glasses Octavia’s way.

 

Clarke smiled to herself before her mood soured when she focused on her mother again. “Mother, how is endangering the lives of everyone here to get me home, when I was fine where I was, for my own good?” 

 

“I didn’t know what to think, it’s not like you not to come back, I thought that they were holding you against your will and simply saying you were fine with it. I guess we all now know the reason for your hesitance to return home,” she said shooting daggers at her and Lexa’s entwined hands.

 

Clarke’s hands balled into fists at her sides, nails digging into her palm on her right hand drawing blood, and her other hand clenching tightly around Lexa’s, she was shaking with her attempts to keep from yelling at her mother, Lexa rapidly released overpowering calming pheromones trying to defuse the situation, Clarke noticed that her mother began to relax, becoming less tense in her own anger and figured that Lexa wasn’t just calming her - however, she could have just been relaxing because Clarke no longer looked as though she was about to hit her.

 

“Mother, you declared war against the commander of the 12 clans… that act, even rescinded, cannot go unpunished.”

 

She saw her friends physically react at the mention of retaliation for the threat of war, becoming guarded and suddenly hostile towards Lexa and Lincoln, as though they were here to slaughter them.

 

Her mother, on the other hand, simply looked offended, “Please Clarke, don’t be overly dramatic.” 

 

Clarke was about to respond, to explode at her mother's naivety and arrogance when Lexa’s smooth, soft timbered voice got her attention, “I’m afraid that Clarke is not being overly dramatic, had it been a member of the coalition they would have been put to death for the act of treason against Heda.”

 

Lexa spoke softly, but there was no denying the authority and danger in her voice. The fact that she referred to her title in the third person spiked Clarke’s interest, she obviously didn’t want Abby to know that she was the Commander yet, Clarke just didn’t know why.

 

“Well, we are not a part of your Commanders coalition.” She all but spat at Lexa “He has no authority over us.”

 

“You are right that Heda has no authority over you and that you are not yet a part of the coalition, but you misinterpret what I’ve said, if you were in the coalition only the one - in this case, you - that threatened war, and those that endorse it, would be put to death; in this case as you are… a rivaling nation shall we say, you would all be killed as you are all seen as threats to us who were here first, or as you refer to us as ‘grounders’.” 

 

When Lexa finishes Clarke is shocked, she’d told her that she’d found a punishment that would protect her people but also prevent members of the 12 clans from questioning her. Before either Clarke or her mother could speak Lexa continued, “However, Heda sees no need to kill you all, she wishes to make you allies, for you to become the 13th clan of her coalition.”

 

Abby looks sceptical of the offer, especially as it was coming from Lexa, “Your Commander would do that, no punishment for the threat of war and make an alliance with us?” Abby all but scoffed at the ludicrousy of it.

 

“No, Heda wouldn’t.” Lexa admitted, Abby all but let out a triumphant ‘HA’ assuming that she’d proven that Lexa had been lying, “But as she doesn’t see the need for a war, nor does she want one, and as she wants to be allies she is willing to accept a lesser punishment.”

 

“And what would that be?”

 

“You stepping down as Chancellor and your people punishing you in a manner they deem appropriate.” 

 

Abby becomes enraged at Lexa’s comments, “How dare you, how dare you come in here and tell us what to do, how dare you take Clarke away from us, who the hell do you think you are?” she all but screams at the girl, stepping forward she slaps Lexa across her left cheek, forcing Lexa’s head to turn to the right from the force and unexpectedness of the hit. Everyone is in a shocked stunned silence, the world froze around them for what feels like years but is mere seconds. 

 

Lexa clenched her jaw, her left hand shooting up into the air, stopping Lincoln from moving to take Abby out, turning back to face him she shook her head no, through the bond all wolves have she tells him to go outside and tend to the horses, he does and he’s told and leaves them all standing there, Octavia looks as though she wants to follow him outside the gates, but remains bolted to the spot where she stands, as everyone else does, fearful of making a move and igniting the energy that is abuz in the air around them. Lexa turns back to face Abby, once Lincoln is gone, she clenches and unclenches her jaw a few times, trying to stop the slight sting that is building on her cheek, “In pause, Out pause” she thought over in her head, willing herself not to lose her objectivity, willing her wolf, that was now snarling, to calm her ass down.

 

“I.” she pauses, “Am the Commander of the 12 clans.” she said pausing again, “I am Heda.” 

 

Fear and realisation flash across Abby’s face, but she doesn’t back down, Clarke is fuming at her mother, Lexa having to grip her arms to hold her back.

 

“My offer still stands, step down and have your people vote for a new chancellor and allow them to punish you how they see fit and your declaration of war will be forgiven and forgotten.”

 

Abby looks as though she is about to say something but Kane stepped in, “We accept your offer Commander, thank you.” Abby looks at him as though he’d just betrayed her in the most intimate of ways and this did make Clarke laugh, her laugh was harsh and humourless, it made her mother flinch away from her.

 

Lexa nodded her acceptance to Kane, “I would like to be informed when you have made your decisions if that is acceptable.”

 

“Yes, I’ll have someone tell you when a new Chancellor has been appointed and her punishment has been determined.” 

 

Lexa just nodded in response. To her credit, Abby remained silent during the exchange, stunned into silence from the shock. Clarke still looked like she was about to murder her mother when Kane began leading her away so that they could talk about what had just transpired. Lexa leant into Clarke and whispered into her ear, “Your eyes are glowing my love. Perhaps we should go outside and take a walk to cool off.” she stated softly, but there was a small undertone of command in her voice, “You don’t want to lose yourself in front of your friends.” this was a statement and Clarke remembered where they were and who was with them. She closed her eyes, to her friends it may have looked like she was about to cry, but Lexa knew better, Clarke was trying to hide the fluorescence of her eyes from her friends, she was trying to hide the change. 

 

When she’d calmed down enough that she was sure they wouldn’t be glowing she open her eyes and walked over to her friends, still frozen in shock at the events that had just occurred before them. 

 

As she approached they appeared to snap out of their trance like state. Bellamy was the first to speak, “That was… fucked up, are you ok Clarke?” He looked at her with sympathetic eyes, but she didn’t need nor want his sympathy right now.

 

“I’m fine Bell, just angry.” He nodded understanding that she didn’t want a shoulder right now, just something to hit.

 

“I’m always here to spar if you need Clarke.”

 

Her face softened, “Thanks, Bell, but I don’t think you’d be able to handle me anymore.”

 

He smiled, “I don’t know unless magic was involved I don’t think two weeks would have made you able to beat me.”

 

“You have no idea Bell, meeting Lexa has changed a lot.”

 

“Lexa… So that’s her name?” 

 

“Yes.”

 

Bellamy looked deep in thought for a second before he spoke, Raven and Octavia coming closer to them to join the conversation, “I know she’s the Commander and all Clarke but-” he paused, looking at her for a second, “-if she ever hurts you I will kill her-”

 

“I’ll help.” Octavia piped in “I’m close to being able to beat Bell in the ring.”

 

“Me too, it’d give me a chance to test out a few new toys.” 

 

They all laughed and Clarke thanked them for the offer, “Thanks, guys, though I don’t think that’ll be necessary; I appreciate the sentiment, though, just never say that near or in front of a grounder because they will kill you.” she said looking back at Lexa, motioning her over.

 

When she joined them Clarke formally introduced her to her friends, her and Bellamy having a small staring contest while shaking hands, before his face broke out into a smile. After introductions were done and they had a quick catch up Clarke excused Lexa and herself promising to come back later to talk further.

 

“Did you like them?” Clarke asked

 

“Yes, they seem like they care about you a lot.”

 

“They do, we’re like family. I care about them all so much.” Lexa smiled. Clarke looked up at her as they walked down the path towards where Lincoln waited with the horses, she stopped seeing Lexa’s left cheek properly for the first time; it was reddened with slight yellow bruising beginning to appear around the edges, Clarke tentatively reached out to take her face in her hands and examine where Abby had slapped her. Her face turned down when she saw the bruising that was appearing, a small growl bubbling in her chest, when Lexa turned to look at her her eyes were glowing again, the luminescent grey bright meaning her wolf was close to the surface and she was pissed. Lexa pumped out calming pheromones and purred leaning into Clarke’s touch, trying to calm both the woman and her wolf. 

 

However, even with Lexa’s efforts at calming her, she could still see murderous rage in the blondes electric blue gaze, though thankfully her wolf was no longer as close to the surface had she’d just been, “My love it is fine, it will heal before nightfall.”

 

“That’s not the point Lexa, she can’t just slap you, she had no right.” 

 

“She needed to get it out Clarke, I am more than capable of defending myself if need be. You must calm yourself down before your wolf comes to the surface again and you accidentally hurt someone.” Lexa’s voice was calm and soothing, but Clarke didn’t want to be soothed, she wanted to take her anger and release it.

 

“Oh, I’m going to hurt someone and it won’t be an accident,” she said detaching herself from Lexa and storming back towards the gates of Arkadia, Lexa caught her hand effortlessly and pulled her back to her, cupping her face and forcing her to look up into her eyes. Green eyes that were glowing, telling Clarke that Lexa’s own wolf was close to the surface.

 

Lexa didn’t speak above a whisper, but her words held a weight to them, a sadness, “Clarke, if you hurt her, you will regret it later.” 

 

“She shouldn’t have slapped you, she shouldn’t have been so arrogant! -”

 

“Clarke.”

 

“She can’t look so betrayed after what sh-”

 

“CLARKE.” The authority in her voice silenced Clarke, but the rage was still there. “STOP. You don’t want to hurt anyone you’re just angry. Please calm down.” Although she was asking Lexa put all of her power behind her words willing Clarke to listen and comply. As Clarke’s body sagged Lexa wrapped her own frame around Clarke’s, moulding into her. Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa’s middle and cried into her shoulder, tears falling in silent weeps.

 

Lexa just held Clarke as she cried silent tears, giving her all of her strength, letting her know that she cared and she loved her and that she would never hurt her like how her mother had. 

 

They stood there for a while, receiving dirty looks from Archer’s who passed, but Lexa ignored them, the only thing she cared about was wrapped protected in her arms. Lexa kissed the top of her head when Clarke stopped crying, moving one of her hands up she wiped away the last of the unfallen tears from Clarke's eyes, kissing down the trail the fallen ones had left. “I love you Clarke, yu sou laik klir.” *You are safe*

 

“Ai get in, Mochof Lexa, ai hodnes.” *I know, thank you Lexa, my love.*

 

Lexa leant down and placed a shadow kiss on Clarke’s lips, that Clarke quickly deepened, biting down on Lexa’s lower lip as she broke the kiss and pulled away, causing her to moan. Clarke chuckled, “You like that Commander? I’ll make a note.” she said smiling.

 

Lexa beat down to whisper in her ear, but instead gently bit and tugged on Clarke’s earlobe causing her to reciprocate with a moan of her own and a slight buckle of her hips against Lexa’s. Lexa smiled against the side of Clarke’s face, “You like that-” Clarke let out a whimpered ‘ugh huh’ before Lexa continued “I’ll make a note.” Clarke could hear the smile in her voice as she laughed, “Let us go for a run my love, let out some of you pent-up energy.” 

 

“I can think of a more fun way I could release my ‘pent up energy’,” Clarke said eyes still closed, lightly grinding herself against Lexa.

 

“I’m sure you could.” Lexa bit her lip to suppress a moan, “But as we don’t have a place here I wouldn’t want to risk getting caught…” she paused “Besides, both your wolf and mine need to be released if we are to deal with your mother again.” 

 

Clarke sighed head pressed into Lexa’s neck, taking in her scent, “Well there is always my room.” she said seductively before continuing, “Though I suppose you’re right my wolf is itching to run…” a cheeky smile played on her face, “Afterwards can we spar?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Do you want to play for stakes?”

 

“What did you have in mind Clarke?”

 

“If I win then I get a reward of my choosing.” she said biting her lip, making Lexa’s pupils dilate. 

 

“And if I win?” she husked

 

“Then a reward of your choosing my love,” Clarke said in an innocent tone, though with a suggestive look on her face.

 

“You’re on. But first, let us run.” Lexa said with a smile leading Clarke over to the edge of the forest where Lincoln still waited with the horses.

 

“Lincoln, can you go stable the horse in Arkadia for me please?” Lexa asked

 

“Of course Heda.” 

 

“Oh, and if you could locate Octavia and ask her to find some logins for you whilst we are here, Clarke and I will be staying in her room.” Lexa looked to Clarke who had a triumphant smile on her face.

 

“Yes, Heda. Will you be back soon?”

 

“Yes, we won’t be too long, if anyone asks we went for a walk.”

 

“Of course Heda, I’ll await your return.”

 

“Lincoln, one last thing. As we may be here a while it might pay to have Octavia show you around so that you would be better able to fulfil your duties, and perhaps find somewhere you think suitable to train Clarke.”

 

A small smile ghosted Lincoln's lips, “As you command Heda.” he gave a small bow before walking with the three horses back to the entrance of Arkadia.

 

Clarke and Lexa walked a little deeper into the woods out of view of the settlement; making sure no one was around Lexa began to strip out of her clothing and placing it within a nearby bush, with Clarke following suit. Before Clarke had even finished striping Lexa had transformed into her wolf and stood before her all fluffy and adorable. Clarke let out a small laugh after she had placed her clothes next to Lexa’s, “You know, you really are adorable when you’re a wolf.” 

 

Lexa just purred, nudging into Clarke to tell her to hurry up, Clarke simply laughed and began running, Lexa right next to her, transforming as she jumped over a log. The two looked at each other, the silent challenge of a race to the pond they passed on their way here. They took off, trying to beat each other to the pound, running side by side as they zipped through the forest.


	6. Matters of the heart or matters of an agenda?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot of political dealings, come cute couplely stuff, and some revelations.
> 
> Update: Also WARNING (trigger or otherwise) - violence/ light 'torture'? in this chapter - you'll be able to tell when and can just kinda skip it if you want as it's importance is basically explained in the rest of the chapter (please don't hate me)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys sorry that it's been like a month since the last update, I kind of killed my laptop and had to wait till I got a new one to continue writing the story. I hope you like it, I've tried to take all of your suggestions under advisement to make the story better and what both you and I want :) as always let me know what you think, and let me know if there are any major mistakes, I do try to edit but.... you know how it goes.

A crowd had gathered around them, encircling them, eager to see the two spar each other. Bellomy, Octavia, and Raven all cheered for Clarke, egging her on, boosting her confidence and making her wolf more bold, enabling her to make the first move and take Lexa - who had donned a smug smirk - off guard, crouching down Clarke extended her leg out and swept Lexa’s feet out from under her, sending the Commander to the ground; leaving the crowd gathered around them mouths gaped and cheering. Lexa, however, ever light on her feet was up in an instant, jumping up to her feet and regaining her fighting stance. She surveyed Clarke carefully, no longer dismissing the skills the Blonde had accumulated through their training together. Lexa had planned on waiting the Blonde out, to wait for her to make the first move and take her by surprise; but Clarke knew her methods, knew her strategy, after all it was she who’d trained Clarke.

 

The two had been circling one another daring the other to make the first move when Clarke licked her lips, eyes darting down then to Lexa’s, smirk pulling at her lips and causing Lexa’s attention to be drawn to her beauty mark above the left of her lip; her eyes then traveled down to Clarke’s lips where she captured her bottom lip with her teeth, causing Lexa’s pupils to dilate, her breathing to hitch, her focus to be lost, and that’s when Clarke strikes.

 

Clarke lunged forward, faking a left jab at Lexa’s face, causing her to dodge and not see the right  hook coming allowing Clarke to land the punch. Lexa, however, used the suddenly of the attack to her advantage, moving with the force of the hook into a crouched position, landing a swift series of uppercuts to Clarke’s torso, followed by her leg sweeping to knock Clarke’s feet from beneath her. Clarke saw the kick coming however, and countered by kicking out Lexa’s supporting leg, sending her to the ground. Not about to let Lexa regain her composure and continue her assault, Clarke pounced on her, pushing her own weight against Lexa, pushing her to the ground with her hips, pinning her hands above her head, she leaned in close to Lexa’s face, turning so that her mouth would be level with Lexa’s ear - the cheers and howls of the roaring crowd fading away around them, nothing existed in that moment but them; Clarke’s hips pinning Lexa’s, her body secure under Clarke’s, completely and utterly under her control and at her mercy. Clarke’s breath warm yet chilling against the sensitive skin of Lexa’s ear, sending ripples through her body and causing a heat to pool between her thighs, Clarke softly exhaled her words, a silent whisper only meant for Lexa and the wind to hear.

 

“Looks as though I’ve won Heda-” Lexa shivered under Clarke’s hold, softly rocking her hips beneath Clarke’s, she could hear the smirk in Clarke’s voice as she continued, “-I never took you for a bottom Commander.”

 

Lexa let out a small breathy laugh, letting her words flow out in a sigh, barely there, but full of certainty. “I could get out of this anytime I wished love.”

 

Clarke raised her head, electric blue storm-filled eyes, full of mirth, meeting twinkling cascading forest green, “Oh really?” she smiled, challenge on her lips, she leant down so that her lips were shadowing over Lexa’s, barely there, but Lexa was able to feel the heat of her breath and taste what she could only describe as something entirely Clarke, “I’d like to see you try.”

 

As Clarke began to pull her lips away Lexa raises her head and captures Clarke’s lips with her own, softly biting on Clarke’s lower lips, exciting a grown from the girl on top of her. Clarke’s grip on Lexa’s wrist loosens as she attempts to to deepen the kiss; whilst distracted Lexa takes the opportunity to wraps her Legs around Clarke’s torso, rolling them so that she was now the one straddling Clarke. Breaking the kiss she looks down at Clarke; hair splayed out on the ground, framing Clarke in a ring of golden light, her lips a deep red with a rushing of blood and kiss swollen. She let out a shaky breath as Lexa reenacted the position she’d just been in, hands gripping Clarke’s wrists pinning them above her head, weight rested on top of Clarke to pin her to the earth, leaning her down so that her mouth was by Clarke’s ear she kissed the sensitive spot between her jaw and earlobe, causing Clarke’s breathing to hitch.

 

“No fair-” she husked breathlessly, “You cheated.”

 

Lexa laughed softly, rising to see Clarke pouting, “It’s not cheating, I simply employed the art of distraction.” she smiled smugly down at Clarke, “Looks like I’ve now won Clarke.”

 

“Oh really?” Clarke asked, eyebrow arched in an inquisitive expression, “And how do you figure that?”

 

“Well, I’m on top.” Lexa said with a satisfied smile, “I bested you.”

 

Clarke hummed, “Yes, while you may be on top I still think that I’ve won.”

 

“Oh? How do you figure that my love?”

 

“Well…” Clarke started with a small smile that only grew, “I have you-” she paused “-on top of me-” she rolled her hips causing Lexa to growl slightly “-in the perfect position.” she finished, watching heat creep onto Lexa’s cheeks, and her pupils dilate as they became full blown with lust.

 

Lexa slowly lowers her body over Clarke’s, making sure to roll her hips against Clarke’s center as she went, placing hand on either side of Clarke’s face to hold her weight, her hair falls to the side, brushing against Clarke’s cheek creating a shroud around the pair's faces, “I think you mean it is I who has you in the perfect position oh love of mine.”

 

Clarke smirked up a Lexa, teasing her, “Well perhaps you should prove your power then.” she said, gaze shifting between Lexa’s lips and her eyes, daring her, no begging her to lean forward just a fraction more and capture Clarke’s lips with her own. Just as she began moving the two were cast in shadow and a throat was clearing above them.

 

Lexa was about ready to yell at whoever it was for interrupting them before she moved her head to look up and both girls saw who it was, Abby stood over the pair, eyes like daggers, mouth pulled into a tight line, lips pale from the frowned line. When she spoke her voice was strained with the effort not to yell, “Clarke, if you would get off the ground and act in a proper manner please.”

 

Clarke had been struck silent at having her mother stand over her and Lexa, killing the mood they’d been in, but once she spoke in her arrogant, and condescending tone the fire in Clarke’s heart, her anger for her mother boiled over, she was about to yell at her mother when Lexa rocked back on her heels and got off of Clarke, extending her hand out to Clarke to lift her off the ground, Clarke moved her eyes from Lexa’s hand to her pleading eyes, she knew Lexa could sense her mood shift and knew that she didn’t want to cause a scene. Clarke sighed, taking the hand extended to her and allowed herself to be pulled up as though she were still the human that left camp those few weeks ago.

 

However, when Lexa pulled her up Clarke made her body weightless, doing all the work of raising herself, causing the force Lexa had used to pull her body up to propel her forward, Clarke smirked as she flew into Lexa’s frame. She bit her lip and looked up at Lexa, “Sorry,” her teeth released her lip as she exhaled and ran her tongue over her lips “Not use to having to toning down my wolf abilities.”  

 

Though this was true, Lexa knew that Clarke was doing this somewhat on purpose to infuriate her mother and as petty as it may seem Lexa didn’t really care, Abby had been dreadful to her, but more than that, it was an excuse to be close to Clarke - not that she needed one.

 

Lexa smiled a knowing smile, “En’s ku hodnes” *It’s fine my love* she gave Clarke a small wink before turning her in her arms so that her back was flush against Lexa’s front and her arms encircled Clarke’s waist, holding her close she whispered in her ear, “As long as I have you close, I’m happy.” kissing the gap between her earlobe and jaw when she’d finished.

 

Abby cleared her throat, clearly unamused with what had just occurred and wanting the girl's attentions back, “Clarke, Kane wishes to speak with you.”

 

Clarke untangled herself from Lexa’s arms before interviewing their hands to take her with her. As they began to move Abby spoke up once more, “Just you Clarke.” she said gesturing to their intertwined hands.

 

Clarke again, about to speak up when Lexa remove’s her hand from Clarke’s grasp; as Clarke begins to protest Lexa speaks “It’s fine hodnes, I’ll be here when you get back.” she gave Clarke a tight encouraging smile before speaking to her telepathically.

 

 _“It’ll be fine my love, I need to check on my people anyway.”_ she smiled _“It’ll give me a chance to get some things done without being… distracted.”_ she said, eyes roaming Clarke’s body.

 

Clarke let out a small chuckle, much to her mother's bewilderment, _“Is that all I am to you? A distraction?”_ She said smile ever present on her face.

 

“That and so much more hodnes,” she said out loud, moving to draw Clarke in for a quick kiss before releasing her with a shaky breath, “Now go, help lead your people.”

 

“Okay, bossy, whatever you say.”

 

Clarke gave her a small wave before turning with her mother and walking away.

 

“Oh, how I hate to see you go, but how I love you watch you leave. Am I right Commander.” a chorus of laughter followed the comment making Lexa jump, not having heard Raven and the others approach her, having been too distracted watching Clarke disappear into the remains of the Arch; it wasn’t until Raven had spoken and the others had laughed that Lexa had even registered their presence, forgetting they’d been there for the sparing match beforehand.

 

“Ah… what?” she mumbled noncommittally, not really having heard what she’d said.

 

“Nevermind, I’ll tell Clarke later she’ll love it,” Raven said, jabbing Octavia in the ribs who was still chuckling to herself, next to a Bellomy that looked deep in thought.

 

“Oh right, okay.” Lexa said, looking a the trio rather awkwardly, not really knowing what to say to Clarke’s friends without her present, without being able to follow her lead and nod in the appropriate places; she wanted to get to know her loves friends - her family - those that had helped her survive the earth and that she’d done so much to protect, but in that moment she didn’t know where or how to start, nor did it seem that any of them knew how to either.

 

They all stood in a pregnant silence, only the three girls feeling it as Bellomy was off in thought elsewhere. Lexa was about to engage in conversation about fighting skill and hand-to-hand combat skills the Arker’s were lacking when Lincoln appeared behind the others with her horse.

 

Lexa could feel her body unclench with relief as he made his way over to her, giving Octavia a small smile before coming beside Lexa and whispering to her about an urgent messenger that had arrived for her from Polis. She nodded her confirmation of understanding, moving to leave after mounting her horse she informed Lincoln to say at the Arker’s camp to inform Clarke that she’d left and would be back soon. Lincoln smiled giving a small nod, “As you command Heda” Lexa’s eyes flickered in Octavia’s direction causing Lincoln to blush. Lexa smiled to herself as she rode out of the camp's walls and into the woods to meet the messenger, that had important updates about Polis, the ambassadors, and most importantly the Ice Nation.

 

//

Clarke was in a daze, her meeting with Kane had not gone as she’d expected it would, not that she’d an expectation for the meet nor even an idea of he’d wanted to discuss. Still, that didn’t mean that should couldn’t be thrown by it.

 

_*Clarke had left Lexa to be interrogated by her friends no doubt, given the twinkle of mirth in both Raven and Octavia’s eyes, hearing Raven comment to Lexa about watching her go, she’d almost laughed out loud, but managed to dull it down to a loud exhale of air, her mother still shot her a questioning look as she follow her to where Kane waited. Clarke paid her no mind though, avoiding eye contact and ignoring her as best she could. When they arrived at a door that Clarke recognised as the council meeting room when the Arch was still in the sky Abby knocked and waited for a deep tampered voice to sound on the other side before placing her hand on the sensor to let them in._

 

_When they entered they were meet with the scrunched up expression of Marcus Kane, deep in thought and brooding by the looks of it. When he looked up Clarke felt the air change in the room, his and her mother's eyes locked and something changed, Clarke took a small sniff of the air and instantly regretted it. Though she was new to smelling a shift in pheromones and what they meant she knew this smell, it radiated from both her and Lexa (well ok, mainly her) - Nyko had commented on it several times, expressing both his discomfort and annoyance at having his lessons interrupted by Lexa, and the distraction she brought to Clarke. He’d began to teach Clarke how to smell and identify not only other people's pheromones but her own, but probably most importantly to him, how to disguise her own pheromones so that other wolves couldn’t be privy to her emotions, ‘an important skill to learn when in - or with - someone in a position of power’ he’s said, but Clarke suspected that it was for his own sanity as much as for anything else. - it was an indicator of lust, of want and attraction…_

 

_When the two continued to look at one another and neither addressed Clarke she cleared her throat, no longer wanting to be subjected to the scene in front of her. “You sent for me Kane.”_

 

_Kane blinked several times, as though only just registering that he and Abby weren’t alone in the room, he cleared his throat and heat crept up his neck and onto his tanned cheeks, “Ah, yes Clarke. I have something I wish to discuss with you.”_

 

_Clarke nodded, waiting for him to continue, as did Abby. When he didn’t speak right away Clarke raised an eyebrow in question, he once again looked awkward and uncomfortable - something Clarke had never seen him look her entire time on the Ark - he cleared this throat once more before speaking. “Abby, if you wouldn’t mind leaving me and Clarke.”_

 

_He was unable to make eye contact with her as he spoke, as though breaking some promise and connection between the two; this, along with the pheromone shift, rubbed Clarke the wrong way. She closed her eyes, counting to ten to calm herself down when she heard footsteps and the whooshing sound of the mechanised door opening before more footsteps and the closing of the door._

 

_Her eyes snapped open when Kane once more cleared his throat, fluorescent ring of gray illuminated by her emotions and the suddenty of the action, Kane blinked a few time before shaking his head, hopefully attributing it to the poor fluorescent lighting in the room, rather than suspecting her of having become a supernatural being that horror stories are told of._

 

_Kane rounded his desk, clasping his hands behind his back, before deciding against the rigid posture and instead slouching back against the edge of his desk. They stayed in silence, Kane rubbed his hand on the back of his neck, and awkward and nervous gesture indicating he was unsure of himself and where to start. This was all behaviour Clarke had never seen expressed from the usually confident and forceful natured man._

 

_She soon began to tire of being in the cramped room with no one speaking and longed to go back to Lexa and her friends, so with irritation and unknown anger filling her she grunted out more sharply than intended, “What did you want Kane?”_

 

_Kane flinched at the suddenly of her husky voice breaking the deafening silence of the room, and the tone attached to it._

 

_“Oh, as yes. The reason I asked you here Clarke was in regards to the Commander's terms in regards to letting your mother's threat of war go unretaliated.”_

 

_Clarke held her breath, she wasn’t expecting that._

 

_She looked at Kane, studying him, he squirmed under her intense and focused gaze. “Shouldn’t you be talking to her then Kane?”_

 

_“No. I need your input on them, and how they’ll affect our people.”_

 

_“Kane, just ask me what you wish to ask so that I can go.”_

 

_He nodded, respecting her bluntness, “Of course.” he breathed out a shaky breath, finding the strength to ask his next question, “The Commander has demanded Abby’s resignation as Chancellor, I plan on stepping in until a vote amounts the people can be held - I plan on holding one later this week -” he paused, unsure as to if he should continue, “ as for her other term, Abby being punished by us…” his words died off, hoping Clarke would fill in the blank, but she had no idea where he was going._

 

_“What about her punishment Kane?”_

 

_“I want to know what you think I should do.”_

 

_This admittance shocked Clarke more than the entire encounter thus far, he wanted her opinion on what he should do to punish her mother. Clarke was silent for a moment, gathering her thought, “What have you come up with so far?” she asked_

 

_Kane didn’t reply, just looked off into the distance, “Come on Kane, I know you have a list already compiled, tell me.”_

 

_Kane sighed, “I don’t know what to do Clarke. She committed treason, though she was Chancellor she committed treason against our people, and what was best for them. You know that by our laws an act of treason is punishable by death-” he said, giving Clarke a knowing and saddened look, as had they remained on the Ark this would have been her fate “- I don’t want to punish her under treason but I don’t see how the Commander would accept any other ruling.”_

 

_“She said she would accept any punishment the people decided, as long as it was in reason Kane.” was all Clarke said, she didn’t want her mother to be killed, but she also didn’t want her to be in her life._

 

_Kane looked thoughtful, thinking of alternant situations before Clarke spoke up, “What about the ‘Exodus Charter’? Surely there is a punishment in there that would be suitable?”_

 

_Kane thought for a moment, “How do you know about the Exodus Charter?”_

 

_Clarke just gave him a look of ‘oh please my mother was on the council and my father and I were charged with treason’_

 

_“Right.”_

 

_“So? Anything spring to mind?”_

 

_“Well, there is a punishment for the ‘unauthorised use of firearms’ of 10 shock lashes… We could perhaps implement that.”_

 

_Clarke shook her head, “No.”_

 

_“Well, that’s al-”_

 

_“No, that’s not enough.”_

 

_Kane looked dumbfounded, “What?”_

 

_“It’s not enough.”_

 

_“What do you mean ‘it’s not enough’?”_

 

_“In Grounder customs an act of betrayal or treason is punishable by death, but not just death, death by 1000 cuts… 10 lashes aren't enough.”_

 

_“Clarke, you must understand the pain that comes fro-”_

 

_“I know the pain that comes from them Marcus.” She states flatly, “But I also know that she declared war against the leader of the 12 Clans, and if Lexa doesn’t get adequate retribution for that act then her power will be questioned and an internal war would ensure. She has been more than lenient, the least we can do is provide adequate punishment for Abby’s crimes… It’s not about Lexa, it’s about appeasing her people.” Clarke paused “I don’t want to lose Lexa because of her, I can’t - I would rather lose her than Lexa.”_

 

_“Clarke you don’t mean that.”_

 

_“How would you know Marcus?” her anger was rising once more, “You know nothing, you don’t know what she’s done, you don’t know her at all. She is a monster and has done nothing but take away the things I love.”_

 

_Marcus was stunned by Clarke’s outburst, but she wasn’t finished, “Even now, she does nothing but hurt me. She is rude and righteous, she has forced me to choose between her and Lexa - not that it is a hard choice. She disrespects my-” Clarke choked, her voice full of emotion, “-my father's memory, with YOU!” Clarke directed her anger towards Marcus then._

 

_“How did you-”_

 

_Clarke cut him off “It doesn’t matter how, what matters is that I know.” her eyes zoomed in on him, “She got him killed, and now has the nerve to be with you. Ha, how long do you think it’ll be Marcus?”_

 

_“How long till what Clarke?” Kane asked completely miffed by her statement, unknowing of its meaning._

 

_“How long until she throws you away? How long until she throws you to the wolves?”_

 

_He looked as though he was about to speak, but she cut him off before he got the chance, “What? You don’t think she will? Why not? She did it to her husband that she claimed to love.” Clarke’s voice became more choked with emotion, her voice becoming shrill, she barely croaked out, “She did it to me.”_

 

_Kane’s face soften and he moved towards her to envelop her in a hug, and she let him, sagging against him, his strong arms enveloping around her, protecting her from the world, “She left me to rot, then she sent me to the ground to die. She doesn’t care, she never did… it’s always been about control, nothing else.”_

 

_When Clarke managed to get it all out she was hiccuping with unshed tears, and repressed emotion that clogged her throat, she wept into his shoulder while he stood silent and strong holding her, much like her father did when she had a nightmare when she was little, stroking her hair in a calming motion and rhythm, whispering soft reassurances in her ear to bring her back from her hysteria._

 

_They stayed like that until Clarke grew silence and her body stopped convulsing and shaking from her silent sobbing. They separated and Kane wiped away the last of her tears from her now tear stained face._

 

_“How many do you think it will take?”_

 

_“100.” she paused, “That’s how many of us she sent down to die, that is how many lashes she should receive. It’s also a tenth of the 1000 cuts Lexa’s people receive before death… I think it is more than fair.”_

 

_Kane looked thoughtful, he knew that Clarke made sense, but he couldn’t bring himself to enforce that punishment on the woman he loved, “I’ll do it.” Clarke said, seeing the conflict across his features, “I’ll be acting Chancellor until a vote can be taken tomorrow, and will enforce her punishment.”_

 

_“You.” he said confused, “Chancellor?”_

 

_“Bell and myself lead the 100 when we landed until you all came down, the people respect and follow me, you know this.” she paused, “It was always a point of contention when you first arrived, you and Abby wanted things to go back to how they were in the sky, but the people followed me, it’s one of the reasons I had to leave.”_

 

_Kane was nodding along, he remembered the fights Abby and Clarke would get into over decisions and how some would follow Abby’s rule, but most Clarke’s._

 

_“Alright. Do you wish to go announce Abby’s punishment and the vote for Chancellor?”_

 

_“Yes, will you do it with me?”_

 

_“Of course. Just allow me to inform Abby so that she is prepared and tell the people to gather in the square in 10 minutes.”_

 

_Clarke nodded before exiting the room.*_

 

Clarke had arrived back in the square, finding her friends seated at one of the larger tables with Lincoln, a round of drinks having already been downed and another being brought over by Bellomy. Clarke not only saw but felt a noticeable lack of Lexa’s presence and a frown dawned her face causing her brow to wrinkle. Lincoln was the first to spot Clarke and stood instantly going to her side, he tilted his head down so that it was level with her ear, “Heda had to leave to attend some… business, she told me to reassure you that she’d be back before the evening.” He paused, looking slightly uncomfortable, “Are you alright?” he said pulling back slightly, “Your face is slightly teared stained, and your eyes are… well let's just say it would be interesting for a human to have your eyes..”

 

“I’m fine, thank you Lincoln, nothing I can’t handle, is the tear stains noticeable to human eyes?” she asked, Lincoln squinted before shaking his head no, Clarke sighed with relief that her friends wouldn’t notice, “How do I make my eyes go back to normal?”

 

“Close your eyes Clarke-” she did as she was told, “-focus on my voice, let it ground you, sooth you, now focus on the other things you can hear, the sound of feet pounding the ground, birds singing to the sky, your friends talking. Allow it all to wash over you, claim you.” he paused while she did as he asked, “Now open your eyes Clarke.”

 

She opened her eyes, pupils adjusting to the sudden brightness of the day, Lincoln nodded his approval before stepping aside so that she was now visible to her friends.

 

“Hey, Griffin.” Raven piped up, echoed by Octavia, and Jasper, with Monty letting out a small “Hello Clarke, nice to see you.” and Bellamy plopping down between her and Raven,  wrapping his arm her shoulders, “Princess.” he greeted.

 

“Hey, guys.”

 

Lincoln had reclaimed his seat on the other side of Raven and next to Octavia, much to Bellamy's displeasure it would seem if his scowl was anything to go off. Raven jabbed him in the ribs, causing him to move further into Clarke’s side, he fixed his glare onto her then causing her to whisper out a “Relax Bell.”

 

Clarke didn’t want to listen to her friend's fight so she tried to diffuse the situation by telling them about her meeting with Kane… Well, the parts they needed to know.

 

“So I’m Chancellor for the next 24 hours.” she said casually, “Until a vote is held tomorrow to elect a new one.”

 

They all grew silent and looked at her, “About fucken time” Jasper muttered with the others backing up his utterance.

 

Raven looked at her, “Won’t you just stay in power when this is over?”

 

Clarke shook her head, “I won’t be an option in voting Ray.” Bellamy looked ready to protest, so did the others, but she turned the majority of her attention to him, “You know why I can’t Bell.” that comment silenced him before he could start.

 

“I’m only doing this now because Kane can’t sentence my mother the punishment she deserves, so I’m doing it.”

 

They all looked at her, the only one to speak was Monty, “I’m sorry Clarke, I know how you feel about her, but I’m still sorry that you have to do this.”

 

Clarke just shrugged as though it were no big deal, “It’s fine, I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t think I could do it.”

 

They all stayed silence, pondering in their own thoughts, “Everyone's meeting in the square in 5 minutes so that Kane and I can announce the vote tomorrow and my mother's punishment.”

 

It was Octavia who spoke up first, “Then perhaps we should head over, oh Madam Chancellor.” she said with a grin, oh which Clarke was grateful for.

 

//

 

Kane’s deep voice radiated throughout the square, capturing and holding the people’s attention, he was explaining how Clarke was the temporary Chancellor until a vote could be taken tomorrow, the vast majority of people, nodded happy with her command. As Kane was explaining how the voting would occur tomorrow - making sure that people got all the information they needed before telling them Abby’s punishment - Clarke felt the air sizzle with a new energy, her head snapped up and her eyes focused on a lone figure at the edge of the crowd, a long piece of red material draped over their head and body, but Clarke knew it was Lexa, even before their eyes meet and Clarke saw those all too familiar forest green orbs, grass green ring illuminated, growing brighter the longer their gazes were locked.

 

Clarke heard Kane finish his speech about what would occur tomorrow and introduce her to speak, Clarke moved forward, eyes sweeping the crowd of her people before landing back on those impossibly green orbs.

 

“People of Arkadia, before I tell you the sentencing of Abigail Griffin, I would like to first have your attention while I say something about the vote for Chancellor tomorrow. I think that having one person as our leader will become problematic, it doesn't matter what generation they are from, there are issues either way.” she paused, “That’s why I’m stating, as your acting Chancellor that two people can be voted in, not just one.” she paused while people murmured amongst themselves at this revelation. “I understand that is a radical change but as the world around us changes we must change and adapt to it. I think that having two people will add a certain balance to the power and add wisdom to decision making-” she sent a quick sideways glare at her mother, “- and that is why I am asking you to vote for Marcus Kane and Bellamy Blake to be the Chancellors of Arkadia in tomorrow's election.”

 

The shock was evident on everyone's faces as she scanned the crowd and those around her, evident on everyone's face that is but Lexa’s, she wore a proud smirk.

 

“Now back to why we are here. Abigail Griffin, please step forward.” Clarke announces, voice strong and clear falling over the crowd and ceasing any and all conversation. She could feel the eyes of everyone on her, boring into her; but she didn’t waver. “You are charged with threatening war, unprovoked, and endangering the lives of the people you were sworn to protect; do you deny these charges?”  

 

Clarke looked down at her mother as if daring her to deny the charges that everyone knew to be true. “No,” she said

 

“Because we are adapting and evolving to our new environment you will not be put to death for your crimes, however, these cannot go unpunished. Because of the negligent danger, you put everyone in your punishment will be to be shock lashed 100 times.”

 

Abby’s face pales, Kane obviously hadn’t told her how many she’d be receiving, the area was so quiet you could hear the dropping of a leaf. Clarke feels obligated to explain her decision to her people, “100 lashes was chosen for the 100 lives you carelessly sent down to test the survivability of earth, it is also 1/10th of the cuts received by tractors and people who receive the penalty of death in grounder tradition, and as your crime was committed against the leader of the 12 Clans we will respect them in this way.”

 

Clarke’s explanation left no room for question, everyone seemed to accept her reasoning and even agree with her.

 

//

Abby’s lashings takes over 2 hours to complete, her wounds being treated and her given water and food, Clarke stayed for the entire time, eyes unmoving from her mother's slumped figure tied to the posts, she could feel the eyes of her people shifting onto her every once and awhile, but she knew that both Lexa’s eyes and the eyes of her friends never left her. Lexa was talking to her through the wolf bond, but Clarke had faded her out, faded out her reassurances, her concerns. This was as much a punishment to Clarke as it was to Abby and Clarke needed to feel it, she couldn’t allow herself to be confronted when she needed to be punished and feel this pain.

 

//

 

After Abby’s lashings were complete she was taken to medical by Kane and Jackson, Clarke heard him comforting and apologizing to her, but she hushes him, whispering, “Clarke could have lashed me 1000 times, I still would have done whatever it took to find her, I don’t regret what I did, it got Clarke back.”

 

Kane gave Abby a small sad smile, “Did it? Or did it just push her further away?”

 

//

 

Clarke remained standing there after everyone else had long gone, staring at where her mother had been. Bellamy had tried speaking to her but had been ushered away by Raven and Octavia. Everyone else in camp had conspicuously left her alone as well, Lexa’s doing no doubt.

 

Without the worry of being disturbed Clarke just stood there, as though she’d been turned to stone and was unable to move, gaze fixed on the same point, never moving, never shifting. She could still feel Lexa trying to speak to her; only this time it felt different. That’s when Clarke realised that Lexa was standing next to her, softly coaxing her out of her dazed haze.

 

“Clarke, my love, please come back to me.” her voice was velvety soft, a whisper on the wind, as though she were talking to a frightened cornered animal - though I guess in a way that’s what Clarke was in that moment, frightened by what she’d done and how it hadn’t affected her how one thought it would, and cornered in the life others had set out for her.

 

She blinked her eyes into focus, looking on the world after having been elsewhere for so long. The sun had long since set, the moon smiled down on them and bathed them in light along with the constellations only seen on a clear night, as Clarke looked up and she could pretend that she was still in space, in a simpler time, where her father was still alive, when everything all made sense. But when she felt a warm hand touch against the coldened skin of her wrist she looked down from the expanse of the sky and into the deepest, softest, kindest eyes, larger than the the earth and brighter than the sun. Right then Clarke no longer wanted to pretend that she was still in space, sure crappy things had happened since she’d left - even before then - but had those not happened she would never have found Lexa, she wouldn’t be there right now with Lexa; and for Clarke, Lexa was worth everything.

 

She tugged her wrist towards her body, dragging the attached hand and body with it, she pulled Lexa closer to her and enveloped her in a hug.

 

They stood there for the longest time just holding one another until Clarke shook feeling the cold of the evening seeping into her bones. Lexa pulled back from her for a moment, “Let’s go to bed.”

 

Clarke nodded, leading them into the Ark and to her old cell, which had been her room since the Ark landed on the ground. She hadn’t been to her old room since being on the ground, she hadn’t been there since her dad died. But with Lexa by her side, there was always the promise of tomorrow.

 

Clarke fell asleep that night with Lexa’s strong arms wrapped around her body, comforting and protecting, making a room that had been her prison into a place that felt like home… it was then, on the cusp of sleep that Clarke realised that it wasn’t a room or place that was her home anymore; it was wherever Lexa was that was her home now. She nuzzled in closer to Lexa with that knowledge and Lexa’s scent the last things on her brain before she let the heavy empty release of sleep consume her.


	7. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New leadership and a new system of government for the Arker's, more about Clarke's past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I finished writing this a few days ago but I didn't upload it because of technical issues and I originally wanted to make the chapter longer, but where the story's heading there wouldn't have been any good points to leave the chapter off without it being hideously long, so you're getting a slightly shorter chapter this time, sorry. This was going to be a chapter about logistics and plot but turned into more of a 'filler' fluff chapter (sorry for those wanting heavy plot, though there is still some plot development!) I hope you all had a good Christmas/holiday, and as always let me know what you think of the chapter and the story.

In the week preceding Abby’s punishment and Clarke’s addressal of her people, many stubble changes began to occur in the camp and tensions between Clarke’s people and the grounders had lessened, however tensions amongst her own people had risen. Clarke and her mother haven’t spoken about what happened, they haven’t spoken at all, in fact, both avoiding the other - giving the other space… Well at least that’s what Clarke likes to tell herself; that she’s giving her mother space to process and be angry with her, rather than admitting that she was being a coward and avoiding the woman because simply put, though she had to be punished for what she did and the punishment had to be extreme enough to appease Lexa and her people, Clarke can’t help but think that she went too far, that she let personal issues and emotions cloud her judgement. 

 

She shook off these thoughts and feelings the majority of the time, having things to distract her, but at night when she lay in Lexa’s sweet protective embrace or Lexa in hers, they swam around her head, and every time she thought she’d successfully pushed them away for the night, as she would drift off to the deep embrace of sleep they would surface with the might of an impending death, the feeling of falling from a great high just as you begin to nod off; consuming Clarke’s thoughts once more till the wee hours of the morning where her mind would finally succumb to exhaustion and she’d get a few hours of restless haunting sleep, reliving her mother's punishment, her father's death, and everything she’d done for her people since being on the ground, seeing the faces if all she’d killed. 

 

Clarke would often wake up drenched in sweet, Lexa’s form straddling her, her strong hands gripping Clarke’s shoulders to stop her from thrashing around in her sleep, fighting off the ghosts of her past. She’d wake suddenly, jerked away from the invisible beings she fought, and be confronted with Lexa’s glowing concerned eyes. She’d shake off the encounter telling Lexa it was nothing, that she should go back to sleep. Lexa knew it wasn’t nothing, she could feel Clarke’s fear, she could feel what these dreams were doing to Clarke, but every time she would respect Clarke’s decision not to tell her, it took all her willpower not to press Clarke to tell her, to confide in her, but she did it; knowing - hoping - that when Clarke was ready she’d confide in her.

 

During the day everything appeared normal - but oh how appearances can be deceiving. Since the election there has been tension within the camp, a vast majority of the Arker's had chosen to vote for having two Chancellors and a committee of experts that would advise when their specific field and expertise were concerned, with the ultimate decision being left to a vote by the people, unless, of course, it was an urgent time sensitive matter where calling a vote would be detrimental and irrational. Though that wasn’t what a caused tension within the camp, it was who the people wanted to lead them. Those whose names were put forth were obviously Kane and Bellamy, but surprisingly Jaha and Pike had put their own names forward, having the required two backers to do so; Clarke’s name was also put on the ballot despite her protests.

 

When the votes were read Jaha and Pike got few votes between them sending them out of contention. Kane, Bellamy, and Clarke all had overwhelming support. Next was who the people wanted their two Chancellors to be - Clarke again protesting her admittance in the election at all - the 100 all voted for Bell and Clarke, having seen how well they worked as a team in those months before the others came down, arguing to others that Kane would be the military advisor - an expert in his field - and would help and mentor them; this argument was enough to convince the people of the Ark who voted for Bellamy and Clarke to become their two Chancellors. Clarke was shocked and angry that her protests went unheard and/or unheeded, that her choice was taken by those who couldn’t be bothered thinking for themselves.

 

But, she had been legally voted in and therefore had to serve her people until such a time she was fired, a new vote was cast or the dust had settled enough for her to quite.

 

The next process of the vote was to select a specialist in their field for the heads of various departments. It came as no surprise that Kane was elected as the head of military and security affairs, Abby the head of medical, Pike horticulture and ecology, Sinclair would be in charge of intelligence, maintenance and general science (everyone knew his skill set and it was hard to define); Raven was also elected in a position, however that was even more troublesome to define than Sinclair’s job - she essentially would assist both Kane and Sinclair, whilst also being the camps weapons creator/ distributor - again like the girl herself, difficult to define.

 

Kane was ever supportive of the two young leaders, offering them assistance and guidance as best he could, Pike, on the other hand, was bitter and resentful, especially of Clarke - she wasn’t sure if it was because she was a girl, younger than him, or because she was with Lexa, though she suspects a combination of those three factors - Sinclair supports them, but has little interest in politics and choice to simply do the tasks he is assigned with, talking mostly to Raven or Abby - the two previously being both colleges and friends back on the Ark. Clarke can’t really tell what Abby’s stance on the whole affair is; when the others first arrived she’d treated Clarke as though she were still a child, trying to take over and get things back to the way they were on the Ark, not understanding that it wasn’t that simple, that things couldn't just magically revert back to how they were before, that the 100 looked to Clarke for leadership and inspiration and she couldn’t just come in and expect things to go back to how they were - they’d sent them down there to die because of ‘crimes’ they’d commit and Clarke had stepped up and kept them alive, reverting back into old roles wasn’t something that could just happen - Clarke wasn’t even sure it could happen at all. Clarke had overheard Abby and Raven talking one evening - _*_ _Abby had been mad because she’d gone hunting with Bellamy and Octavia without informing anyone, Bellamy and O had taken their kills to the meat shed to be preserved and cooked, Clarke had been walking over the fire to warm up when she’d overheard them speaking, backs to her, “She thinks because of what she’d been through she’s changed, but she’s still just a kid.” Raven had looked at her with bewilderment and sorrow etched into her features, “You’re wrong Abby,” her face began to show traces of anger now, anger for her friend and the situation, “She stopped being a kid the day you sent her down here to die.”  Clarke didn’t stay long after that, she didn’t want to see the look on her mums face, the realisation dawning on her about the truth in what Raven had said*_ Clarke wasn’t sure where Abby stood now, all she knew was that she hadn’t openly opposed her and Bellamy's ascension to Chancellor, with their lack of communication Clarke could even pretend that Abby was proud of her - it would be fitting, Clarke had thought, that Abby would be proud of her for something that she doesn’t want. 

 

Lexa supported Clarke as best she could, she knew that other girl didn’t want this anymore, to lead her people, to have them all looking to her for guidance, looking to her to lead, to sacrifice pieces of herself for them until there was nothing left, she’d wanted to leave that behind - she thought she had when the others had arrived - but now she was forced into it all over again, forced to grow up too quickly again - she’d just been able to do as she pleased, not having to worry about where the others were and of they were ok - unable to revel in her new freedom at being a wolf, at having found Lexa. For a moment she’d been free, she’d been safe, and most importantly she’d been happy.

 

Lexa would convince her to go out on runs and hunt with her, it helped Clarke’s racing anxious mind, but it was difficult to find time to shift and run when there were constantly people hovering. Clarke hadn’t wanted this, she’d wanted to come back, to show she was fine, maybe spend a few days with her friends, show Lexa where she’d grown up and then leave, go back to their peace; but, unfortunately things solemn work out the way we hope or plan them to.

 

Lexa isn’t fairing much better, she hasn’t told Clarke because she has enough on her plate already, but the Ice Nation's Queen Nia has mobilized her army and is sending them to Polis, Lexa will have to leave to deal with her treasonous actions - though because they hadn't declared war on Lexa there wasn't anything she can do but call a clan meeting - she plans on riding to Polis this evening to deal with Nia, but she doesn’t wish to leave Clarke, she know that she sleeps better when Lexa is there holding her, Lexa sleeps more easily as well, having her love in her arms, but she must see to her people, as Heda her duty is to them, Lexa will just have to take a back set for a few days.

 

Lexa goes in search of Clarke around lunch time, to inform her she’ll be gone for a few days, she looks in all the usual places, the river about 2k’s into the forest, on top of the Ark station, the drop ship, their room, the training area - nothing. Lexa was at a loss as to where she could be, and she couldn’t use Clarke’s scent to track her down because her scent was everywhere, their combined scene even more present around the camp; Lexa sighed, unsure of what to do next except reach out and ask her where she was, but Lexa suddenly has another idea. 

 

Legend says that true mates can feel where the other is when without them - it’s basically a heightened version of being able to reach out and feel the other's emotions - Lexa had never tried to do this before, simply because she and Clarke are usually together, or they know where to find one another, she doesn’t know if it’ll work, but she’s willing to give it a shot.

 

She closes her eyes and clears her mind, letting it empty and go blank, blocking out the sounds and smells around her till she's only focusing on all things Clarke, Clarke’s scent - their combined scent - Clarke’s blond curls, her soft pale skin, her eyes smiling and glowing as her smile reaches up to her eyes exposing teeth, cheeks heating going a rosy red when she’s embarrassed. Lexa thinks of everything that she associates with Clarke, everything Clarke means to her, and then she feels a kind of pull. Her eyes snap open and she follows the direction of the pull, she strides confident and sure, as if she knew where she was going.

 

She enters the Ark station and heads down various corridors she doesn’t recognise, she comes to a hallway that she hasn’t ever been too, but she can both smell and sense Clarke, she’s been here recently, and a long time ago, her scent from when she was human lingers and clings to the metal walls. Lexa follows both the pulling sensation and the smell of human Clarke mixed with her Clarke.

 

Lexa ends up standing outside a door at the end of the corridor, the word ‘SIX’ written next to a small window slit on the door. Lexa looks inside and sees a lounge and kitchen, with three more doors on the inside walls; Lexa takes a shaky breath before placing her hand on the entry pad and the door opens. 

 

Lexa walks inside and is hit with an onslaught of both familiar and unfamiliar scents. She can smell both Clarke’s old and new scent, heavily in the room, clinging to every surface unable to let go of her - Lexa couldn’t blame them she never wanted to let go of Clarke. Abby’s scent was also heavy in the room; Lexa thinks that this must be Clarke’s old home before she was arrested and placed in the cell that the two have been calling home, the ‘sky box’ as Clarke referred to it. But there is also a scent that Lexa doesn’t fully recognise, though she’d smelled hints of it before. It’s muskier than the other two dominant scents, it has a sweet tang mixed with the smell of wood shavings and the fresh smell of a flowing river after a heavy rainfall. 

 

As Lexa racks her brain for where she’d smelled it before, unable to figure it out. She’s startled when a soft voice speaks from the entrance of one of the doors, “It’s my dad.”  Clarke says, voice soft and barely there, Lexa hadn’t heard her enter the room, wrapt up in her own thoughts.

 

“You know it from my watch.” she says, holding up her right wrist where it hung for good measure, “it was his, he gave it to me before… before.” she stammered out before looking solemnly at the ground.

 

Lexa moved to embrace her, both amazed and enamoured by her ability to read Lexa’s thoughts, without actually doing so. She reached out intending to tug Clarke into her arms and out of the doorway, but instead of grabbing Lexa’s hand and moving into her awaiting embrace Clarke pulled on the extremity whilst stepping backwards, dragging Lexa into the room she’d presumably been in before she’d made her entrance into the living area. 

 

There were no conflicting scents in this room, just purely Clarke. Her scent attacked Lexa scenes and she loved it. The smell of freshly fallen rain, old books, the sun in the lazy afternoon, and something entirely unique to Clarke, Lexa loved all of it, taking in a deep breath she sighed contently as she smashed into the slightly shorter figure in front of her, turning to bury her face in Clarke’s neck, going to the source for a more concentrated dose of her scent. 

 

She trailed light kisses along Clarke’s neck, moving up towards her ear, before grabbing her earlobe between her teeth, giving a small bite, pulling it down before releasing it suddenly; causing Clarke to take a sudden sharp inhale of breath, when Lexa releases her earlobe Clarke lets out a deep breathy moan from her throat, exciting a small responding growl from Lexa’s throat. Their eyes lock, a look of full blown want, need, desire, and love filling them, without hesitation their mouths collided in an explosion of their emotions for one another, this one physical act being used to express how they feel about one another - the collision of two parallel forces never meant to meet, and when they did the effect was explosive, unpredictable; magical. 

 

They break apart, foreheads resting against one another's, breaths loud and shaky, eyes close as they take in the moment that consumed them. When their breathing began to normalise Clarke let out a small chuckle, “I didn’t pull you in here for that…” she paused, a small smirk pulling at her lips, “Well… maybe I did, but that wasn’t the only reason.” 

 

Her words brought Lexa back to the present and the fact that she had to tell Clarke that she would be leaving for a few days, though the change in both their pheromones due to their heated kiss is evident to Lexa and it only makes her insatiable hunger for Clarke grow.

 

Lexa’s pupils are blown wide, matched by Clarke’s heated and hungry look, she knows that if they stay in such close proximity neither of them will be capable of saying what they need to, so reluctantly she releases her hold of Clarke’s cheek and waist, detangling herself from Clarke’s grasp and takes a step back, closing her eyes, trying to take deep calming breaths through her mouth, avoiding taking in Clarke’s scent. 

 

When her heart rate has returned to a somewhat normal rhythm she opens her eyes again to see curious electric clear blue studying her intently, Lexa lets out a small chuckle that doesn’t quite leave her chest and her mouth slightly turns up at the ends; Clarke blushes at having been caught admiring her girlfriend. She closes her eyes for a moment and clears her throat before breaking the relative silence of the room with her husky lust filled voice. 

 

“The other reason I pulled you in here was to show you who I was before… before everything changed, before the world I’d known was shattered.” 

 

Lexa only nodded, afraid that if she spoke she’d scare Clarke off, make her clam up and stop sharing pieces of herself with her. 

 

“This was my room, my family home before my dad was floated and I was taken to the sky box.” 

 

Lexa moved forward the slightest inch, wanting to go and comfort Clarke, but she knew that Clarke wanted to get this out, that she didn’t want to be comforted, she just needed to share this, this part of herself, her past, with Lexa.

 

Clarke walked over to the far wall, Lexa trailing behind her, following the movements of her hands as she reached up and ran her fingers over faded sketches and engravings on the walls of the room, she watched Clarke’s hand rest against the wall of an eternity before falling to her side.

 

“When I was younger I’d find anything and everything I could to do art, if we couldn’t get paper and charcoal my dad would bring some scrap metal back from his work in engineering and make it so that I could use it to engrave the walls, the floor, any surface; it made mum so mad. I use to only do it in places she wouldn’t see, under the bed, behind my desk; it was mine and my dad’s secret.” she paused turning to look at Lexa, unshed tears in her eyes a whimsical and nostalgic look in her eyes, “One day she came home earlier than either of us thought she would, she came into my room and saw my dad helping me do a design on my ground where my bed usually sat. At first she was speechless, she just walked out, later I heard them arguing about supplies, I didn’t really get it; but later that night she came in, I thought I was going to be in big trouble-” Clarke let out a small breathy laugh, mostly to herself, “-but I wasn’t, she came in and asked me to show her what I’d drawn… at first, she couldn’t see it, but then I ground up some of the charcoal my father had procured for me and spread it over the image, I made my mum stand on my bed so that she could see it from a bird's eye view.” Clarke paused again, caught up in the memory of when she’d shown her mother her first artwork, “Tears had filled her eyes, I thought I’d upset her or made her angry, but she’d told me that they were tears of joy and that she was so proud of me, she’d hugged me so tight I’d thought that I was going to suffocate.” Tears now filled Lexa’s eyes and she gave small sobbed laughs along with Clarke, “My dad had been standing at the door and stood on the bed and joined us looking down at the image on the ground, we stood there for so long just looking down, my parents on either side of me holding hands and half hugging me.”

 

Clarke’s eyes came back into focus then, they meet Lexa’s and there was both sadness and the clarity of understanding a long thought about riddle in them, “It was the most I’d ever felt like we were a family, that it was the three of us against the world - I’d always had more of a connection with my dad than I did with my mum, she’d always expected certain things of me, wanted me to be a certain way, whereas my dad just wanted me to be me, no matter what that meant.” she paused “But, in that moment she was there with us too, she just wanted me to be me, and she just wanted to be her, with us - she didn’t want to be the head of the surgical team or a member of the council, she just wanted to be Abby Griffin mother and wife. It had been perfect.” 

 

They stayed silent for a moment, having moved to the bed and sat down on it while Clarke re-told the moment from her past, Lexa broke the silence light caressing Clarke’s right cheek, coaxing her to look at her, Clarke leaned into her touch, warming Lexa’s heart, she didn’t trust her voice, but she spoke none the less, “What had you drawn?” 

 

Clarke looked at her more in focus now, not having expected the question, she got up off the bed, Lexa quickly following, before she pulled it away from the wall towards the door, she grabbed some charcoal off the desk before hoping the bed and grounding it onto the floor when it had just been. When she was satisfied she stood on the bed, extending her hand out to Lexa to pull her up onto it with her. When Lexa looked down at the ground she was speechless, her breath had been completely taken away. It was absolutely stunning. 

 

Clarke looked at her with anxious eyes, fidgeting as she asked: “Wha- what do you think?” 

 

Lexa looked up to her, “It is the most amazing thing I have ever seen Clarke.” 

 

Clarke blushed, “Thank you.”

 

“I can see why your parents were completely enamoured with it, with you.” 

 

Lexa looked back at the image on the ground, scratched permanently into the ground was an image of a river that reflected the shadows of the trees that it stretched into and the crescent moon in sky that trees reached towards, the starry sky expanding around it and reaching out to the corners of the image, faint lines and shadows of planets beyond earth ghosting beneath them.

 

Clarke turned to face her completely infatuated with the girl who looked at her work and her with such fascination and awe. Clarke couldn’t contain herself, she spoke with such emotion in her voice that it was barely above a whisper and broke “I love you.”

 

Lexa turned to face her, “Not as much as I love you hodnes. Feva en otaim.” *Forever and always*

 

Clarke smiled, hand cupping Lexa’s face before pulling her in for a soft sweet kiss, linger on her lips only for a moment. Lexa sighed and leant into her touch.

 

“I wish we could stay like this forever.” 

 

“We can.” Clarke said earnestly, moving to rest her forehead against Lexa’s, cupping the other side of her face with her free hand, “I know I’ve been busy lately but when things settle down, I want to leave Lexa, I want to leave with you, be with you and your people.”

 

Lexa smiled, “I would like that very much Clarke.” she paused her smile turning sad, “But I’m afraid that our forever is going to have to wait a little longer, I must return home to Polis, there are matters that require my attention that cannot go left unattended.”

 

Clarke nodded, understanding Lexa’s responsibility to her people, “When do you leave?”

 

“Now,” Lexa said swallowing a lump in her throat at having to leave the Blonde behind, this was going to be the first time the pair was separated since they’d bounded and Lexa could already feel the dull ache in her chest forming at the mear thought.  

 

“I came to say goodbye to you before I left.” Clarke nodded against her forehead. 

 

They were silent for a moment before Clarke spoke, “Ask me to come with you.”

 

“What?” Lexa said opening her eyes, pulling slightly away from Clarke so that she could look into her eyes.

 

“Ask me to go with you.”

 

Lexa looked pained, as much as she wanted Clarke to accompany her to Polis, as much as she wanted for Clarke to see and experience her home, and to announce to her people that Clarke was her and she Clarke’s - as much as she didn’t want to be separated from her mate -now wasn’t the time. Not with how much Clarke’s people needed her here and not with the problems festering in Polis.

 

“I can’t Clarke. As much as I wish it, I can’t.” she barely choked it out, a deep pain evident in her voice, Clarke looked at her eyes soft and kind.

 

“I know you can’t, and that’s one of the reasons I love you; you put the needs of your people - our people - above what you or I want.”

 

Lexa leant down burying her face in the crook of Clarke’s neck, “You have no idea how much I wish I could just run away with you Clarke, how much I want to leave everything behind and just give you the world. But I am bound to my people as are you, and as much as we may wish it, we cannot just walk away from that.”

 

Clarke nodded understanding what Lexa was saying, “I’ll hopefully be back in a few days, I’ll try and get the mess in Polis wrapped up as quickly as possible.” 

 

“Is that because you don’t want to deal with it, or because you want to come home to me?” Clarke asked a sly smile on her face.

 

Lexa ghosted her lips over Clarke’s untouching, when the Blonde inhaled sharply Lexa knew she’d achieved the desired result, “Maybe a bit of both, though the latter is a much more compelling reason.” she said smiling when her breath scent shivers rippling through Clarke’s body.

 

“I really should go.” 

 

“Yes.” 

 

Neither moved, staring into one another’s eyes smiling, waiting for the other to give in first. They burst out into a fit of laughter, neither willing to break contact before the other. Lexa leant forward, closing the small space between hers and Clarke’s lips capturing her in a deep kiss, that made Clarke’s head spin from the intensity, before pulling away and exiting the room with the inhuman speed of a wolf. Clarke’s hand flew to her kiss swollen lips, gliding over where Lexa’s saliva meet hers, feeling her still there. She closed her eyes and she could still feel the shadow of Lexa’s lips on hers.

 

She ran out of the room, wanting to catch Lexa before she was gone for god knows how long. When she exited the Ark Lexa was nowhere in sight, she opens her mind and called to her, but her mind felt different, more primal, need driven. Clarke realised that Lexa had shifted and was running back to Polis, she looked to the forest and the trees that rolled up the hills beyond. At the top of the closet peak Clarke swore that she saw a form standing there looking down at her when the animal howled, she knew for certain it was Lexa if there was ever a doubt in her mind. She sent a message to Lexa through their bond, unsure if she’d get it at this distance unsure of how that worked.

 

_ “Am I that good of a kisser that you literally had to run from the room and turn into a wolf just to stop yourself from staying?”  _ Clarke asked, entirely not expecting a reply so when one came she was a little shocked.

 

_ “Yes little wolf, you are. You are intoxicating in every way Clarke, I had to tear myself away from you, even now I’m fighting my wolves instinct to come back to you.”  _

 

Clarke smiled, able to see Lexa in her mind's eyes, feel her love through their bond, she spoke, unsure if it were out loud or only to Lexa,  _ “I love you, Lexa. Be safe and come home to me.” _

 

_ “I will always return to you, my love.” _

 

Clarke smiled, she could feel just how true that statement was and how much Lexa meant every one of her words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also this is the image Clarke drew (https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/ef/a9/86/efa9862dd7064025d669a50751ece412.jpg) it's the one from the show :)


	8. Power in Polis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't say this enough but thank you all for the support that you show this fic and for the wonderful comments you leave that help me know what you want out of this and that help me mold the story, sorry for the delay in updating, since Christmas I've taken a lot of extra shifts at work to try and save up for when I got to university in March (which I got my acceptance letter yesterday for, so I finished this chapter as a sort of celebration), so thank you for being patient with me.

It took Lexa just over a few hours to run to Polis, it would have taken less time but she was in a constant battle with her wolf over returning to Clarke’s side - to say that her wolf was both overly protective, possessive, and obsessed with Clarke would have been an understatement… Not that Lexa herself wasn’t just as infatuated. As she made her way to Polis her mind would wander to thoughts of the Blonde and when her mind would focus she would find herself closing in on Clarke’s scent, traveling back to the Sky People’s camp to be with her mate; she had to actively focus on the situation in Polis and what Nia had planned to stop her thoughts wandering and her heart guiding her back to her love.

When she’d arrived in Polis she was greeted by her advisor’s; Indra, Gustus, and Titus and her mentor Anya. They had begun informing her on what had been happening in Polis and her people since her absence and what was happening with the Ice Nation and their queen Nia. Because it was so late in the evening when Lexa arrived back in Polis she commanded that they inform the Ambassadors from each Clan that there would be a Clan meeting tomorrow morning at first light in the upper chamber of the tower, her ‘throne room’ as Clarke had dubbed it when Lexa was telling her about the layout of the tower and what each room's purpose was. Indra and Gustus obeyed their Heda immediately, going off to inform the Ambassador’s from the twelve Clans of the meeting, Anya scoffed and walked out of the throne room back to her chambers for the evening, Titus however, remained behind.

Lexa could tell he was itching to make comment on her absence, in every correspondence they’d shared there’d been some subtle comment on it. Lexa had yet to tell her advisors about Clarke - well, not more than she was the leader of the Sky People, she’d been injured and that Lexa had looked after her then taken her home to try and start peaceful negotiations with the Sky People. However, even this Titus was not a fan of, none of her advisers were in fact, but he was most vocal about his distrust and distaste for the Sky People.

“What is it, Titus? I know you wish to say something, speak true.” She says, not turning as she looked out onto her people going about their evening routines from the balcony of her ‘throne room’. She watched them as the hustled around the square, vendors lighting lanterns to prolong the onset of darkness and allow the day to never end.

While waiting for Titus to reply Lexa looked out to the lands beyond the realms of the city limit, the mountains and forests that lead back to her beloved, the sun threatening to descend on them - the sky alight with bronze and crimson, flakes of pink and gold peeking through to set the sky alight - long gone are the soft baby blues and soft whites of the day sky, here in the night the inferno of life is alight - it leaves the horizon in silhouette, reaching up to the inferno, seeking prosperous, colour, life. It was beyond beautiful. It reminded Lexa of Clarke and how her fingers would twitch with the need to capture the image with her paints, to replicate it and preserve it forever, the thought left sadness in Lexa’s heart, casting a bitterness to the beauty before her. It feeling as thought she’d be eclipsed in the darkness of Clarke’s absence forever, unable to enjoy the beauties nor simple pleasures of life again without her.

“Forgive me Heda, but you seem distracted.”

She was, her mind was fighting with her heart, thoughts of Clarke, her voice, her touch, her scent all fought to be in the forefront of Lexa’s mind, but so did thoughts of strategy and planning for the meeting that would happen in the morning, her head and her heart in a conflicting battle. The most troubling thing about the battle was that Lexa wasn’t sure what side she wanted to win - a lie - she knew what side she wanted to win, she just felt guilty that she wanted love over duty, especially when it looked as though her people would need her the most.

“I am.” was all she said in response to Titus once she realised she’d been distracted, consumed in her thoughts for an extended period of time.

“Don’t tell me you’re distracted by this Sky Girl trash whose scent, even I can smell, clings to you even now.” he spat with clear vile dripped disdain in his voice.

Lexa whipped around, drawing her dagger from her waist belt, placing it against Titus’s throat as she slammed him against the far wall, growling deep in her throat and stomach; Titus’s face morphed from one of anger and smug righteousness to one of shock and fear.

“YOU WILL NEVER SPEAK ABOUT HER OR HER PEOPLE LIKE THAT AGAIN!” she growled through gritted teeth. Her free hand moving to grip the base of his throat whilst still holding her blade to it, squeezing slightly as her nails dug into his flesh.

Beneath her, Titus was shaking with fear and the inability to breathe efficiently, whilst above him, pinning him to the wall, Lexa was shaking with pure unadulterated fury. Her forest green eyes alight with her rage, with the luminescent grass green ring around her eyes alight indicating her wolf was close to the surface, prepared to defend and protect her mate - if only her honour - locked with dark blue rings that immediately turned down in submission. Titus began exhibiting signs of submission - such as whimpering and trying to expose his neck (though difficult to do in his current position) - trying to appease the wolf in Lexa.

Lexa’s wolf, however, is unappeased by these acts, she is if possible, further angered by this non- wolves attempts at mimicking their behaviours. Lexa’s control is slipping to her wolves as she tightens her grip around his neck and moves her blade in such a way that it draws blood.

Lexa is now breathing audibly, deep heavy breaths leaving her throat, as she attempts not to succumb to her rage and the pull of her wolf and simply kill Titus for his insolence. It’s only when she hears a soft humming at the back of her head and a feeling of calm wash over her that her rage begins to dwindle. As she focus more on the humming and soft tugging of calm they grow, the humming comforting and calming her psyche; her muscles begin to relax from their stiff coiled state, her rage dissipating, she releases Titus from her hold, she absently registers that his form slumps down the wall into a piled heap on the floor, gasping for air as he holds his throat, trying to massage the pain out and trying to stop the blood from the small puncture Lexa’s knife had left from flowing down onto his clothing.

Lexa closes her eyes and hones in on the humming in her head, thinking she’d gone mad. It was the song she’d sung to Clarke when she’d first awoken as a wolf. “Hush-a-bye, don't you cry, go to sleep, my little baby. When you wake, you shall have all the pretty little horse. Black and bays, dapples and greys, all the pretty little horses. Way down yonder, in the meadow. Poor little baby, crying mama. Hush-a-bye, don't you cry, go to sleep, my little baby. When you wake you shall have all the pretty little horses.” The voice had begun to sing after it had hummed the whole song through.

Lexa listens to the voice, husky and rich in timbre, soothing. The voice is oddly familiar, yet vastly different - it has a sweeter tone, a more hopeful and carefree disposition on the world than the tried and tired voice that Lexa has become accustomed to associating with the owner. As she listens to the voice she allows herself to sink into it and let her mind wander to images of Clarke; she allows herself to fall even further in love with her mate, just from her voice, the hope for the future that it rise in Lexa - a hope for a life free of violence and political obligation (or at least a less messy political obligation).

Lexa doesn’t realise that she’d began swaying along to the voice, humming softly along to the song, that is until the singing stops and the voice of the woman she loves speaks.

“You feeling better now babe?”

Lexa’s a little stunned at first, she knew that true mate bonds were stronger than that of a regular bond, and the connection that packs have, but even she hadn’t speculated just how much stronger they were. She hadn’t dreamt that communication between mates beyond a few hundred miles were possible.

She’s still swaying in place with her eyes closed when she answers, “Yes, thank you.” her cheeks redden slightly, “How’d you know that I was upset?”

“I… I don’t know how to explain it. I just knew, I could feel it.”

Lexa nodded though Clarke couldn’t see her, understanding what Clarke was trying to explain.

“It’s stronger the closer I am to you, I can feel what you’re feeling more acutely, but even now I still feel everything so strongly… It’s like I’m right there with you, feeling it all myself.” Clarke pauses for a moment “You were really mad babe, like ‘I’m completely capable of murder right now’ mad… it knocked me on my ass-” Clarke laughs slightly, “Well not literally, but it almost did. It felt as though the wind had been knocked out of me and my emotions were still my own - I could still feel what I was feeling - but they were also overtaken by your’s, they were so strong that I felt them as they were my own… I almost snapped at Raven, but luckily Lincoln got me out and away from everyone.”

“I’m so sorry Clarke I-”

“It’s not your fault Lexa, don’t apologise, you have nothing to be sorry for.”

“But if I could have controlled my emotions then you wouldn’t have almost hurt your friend, you wouldn’t be-”

Clarke cut her off again, “Almost Lexa, as in didn’t. It was just from the suddenly and intensity of the emotions, I think it was also because in all of Nyko, Lincoln, and your teachings I was told that I wouldn’t be able to feel you or your emotions when we were far from one another… I think that that notion led us to have a placebo effect-”

“Placebo?” Lexa says the foreign word, testing it on her tongue, finding that she doesn't like the feel of it.

“Oh right, umm, the Placebo effect is when you believe something will happen so it does - however, it doesn’t actually happen… Errr that doesn’t make much sense to you does it Lex?”

“I’m afraid I don’t follow your logic Clarke, perhaps an example.”

“Right. So for example, we believed that we wouldn’t be able to talk to each other or feel one another more than a couple of hundred miles away like the other pack bounds, so that’s what happened, we basically blocked each other out because we were expecting to feel anything. But when you had a onset of intense emotions they fluid my mind because it was a stronger presence in my mind than your normal presence… Does that make sense? Because I think I may have just confused myself.”

Clarke had begun rambling, and Lexa could tell she was nervous about explaining something that was new and foreign to her, as well as for Lexa and what had made her so murderous.

“Yes, Clarke I think I understand now, thank you.”

They remain silent for a moment before Clarke speaks, “You really scared me, Lexa, I thought something had happened, I’d started to shift and head towards Polis - I think it was somewhat because of the rage you were feeling but I think it was more concern for you.”

“I’m sorry Clarke, it was never my intent to frighten you.”

Clarke’s quiet for a minute before speaking in a shadow of a whisper of a voice, “I can’t lose you, Lexa… I love you too much.”

“And I you hodnes.”

Silence precedes their declarations, both soaking in what the other said, soaking in the feeling of being loved so purely by another. Clarke is the first to break the silence, Lexa can hear the smirk in her voice, “So ah, you liked my voice then?”

Lexa’s cheeks feel as though they’re on fire, she lets out a small laughed sigh at the change in the mood and direction of their conversation, grateful. She can all but hear Clarke snorted out a laugh. “How’d… how’d you know?” she managed to stammer out.

“What, apart from the fact that we share a psychic connection?” Lexa can feel Clarke smile, her voice full of puckish intent, “I knew you were swaying to my singing”

Lexa nod’s again, cheeks alight more so than the setting sun in the sky that she’d left moments ago, sure that if Clarke could know she was swaying to her voice that she’d know that she’d nodded in response to her question.

“I could also feel your mind calming, the rage leaving and peace flowing over it.” She states simply and Lexa can see Clarke’s shoulder shrug in her mind as though it were no big deal, she rolls her eyes, though still closed.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me, Lex.”

“How did you know that I rolled my eyes?”

“I don’t know what to tell you, I’m just that good.” Lexa could see the smirk on her lips again the mirth playing in her eyes, she could feel her own expression soften.

“You sure are.”

Clarke was quiet again, “Because I know you, Lexa because I love you, that’s how I know.”

“I love you too Clarke, gon de skaifaya en bakon, feva en otaim.” *to the stars and back, forever and always.*

Lexa could feel Clarke’s feeling for her, her love, seeping through their bound and it overwhelmed her in the most wonderful of ways.

Lexa could sense that people had entered the throne room, though from their scents knew it was only Gustus and Indra. Indra went over to check on Titus, she could hear them talking but drowned them out, focusing on Clarke’s presence in her mind, she was still there though neither of them were speaking. Gustus began to try and obtain her attention through speaking to her, though when that proved ineffective he gripped her upper arms and shook her slightly, trying to shake her out of the trance that he thought she was in.

Lexa sighed, “I must go back to the world my love, I have acted in anger and must deal with the consequences, I hope to return to you soon.”

“That doesn’t sound good Lex, but I trust your judgment…but if… if anything else happens I’m coming to Polis, I… Lincoln won’t be able to stop me, I won’t… I couldn’t… if anything happened…” Clarke sighs unable to articulate what she wanted to say, so she put it in the simplest way she knew how, “I love you, Lexa, so, so much. Mou kom Ai could ever biyo o Yu could ever get in.” *More than I could ever say or you could ever know.*

“Ai get in hodnes.” *I know love*

The last thing Lexa hears as she allows herself to be pulled out of her head and away from the soft comfort and support of Clarke is the Blondes husked voice muffled saying “Until we meet again.”

Lexa’s eyes shoot open, coming into sharp focus almost instantaneously. She sees Titus still on the floor, however, in a more composed state than when she’d closed her eyes. Indra was over by the door lighting lanterns to illuminate the room (more for Titus’s benefit as the others are capable of seeing in the darkness) - she’d been in her conversation with Clarke longer than she’d thought, the last remnants of the sunset long gone, the room cold around her without the warmth of the fading sun.

Her eyes finally still and focus on the soft, confused, affectionate, unguarded features of the face before her. Deep ocean green eyes locked onto her forest green, worry lines crinkling the skin around the eyes and on the forehead of the otherwise composed face. The deep pronounced scars and snarl lines, alone with his facial tattoos are a complete juxtaposition to the soft and caring nature the man’s eyes portray towards Lexa. His lips pulled into a frown of confusion and concern, mostly hidden by his low hanging beard - his usual large and menacing features, stature, and presence diminished as he looks upon Lexa. Making him seemingly small and childlike, as he let his guard slip away and his emotions run free over his features.

“Lexa? Are you back with us?” He whispered for only her to hear, worry evident in his tone.

“Yes Gustus, I’m fine.”

They spend another moment looking into one another's eyes, both trying to figure the other out. When Gustus doesn’t move away after a moment of pause Lexa speaks up, authority and a slight warning in her voice, not wanting to be so close to someone who clearly cared and was worried for her, yet unable to speak freely to one another with the others present, afraid that something might break inside her; nor wanting to appear weak in front of her people - even those she’d once considered able to entrust her life to.

“Gustus, release your grip and step back.” her tone was lower than usual, still laced with the remnants of her previous anger.

Gustus steeled his gaze, hardening his stare so that to the untrained eye he appeared pragmatic and distant, his mask of Lexa’s advisor slipping on, making him appear as though he were that and nothing more - it was safer that way, to hide their connection to one another from the world, it kept them both safe.

He releases his grip of Lexa’s biceps, his hands sliding down her forearms before landing like fallen tree trunks at his sides, seemingly defeated. He sighs before taking a swift step back, giving a curt nod with his reply, “Sha, Heda. Ai Moba.” *Yes, Heda. I apologise*

Lexa returns his nod as an acknowledgement of his apology. She clasps her hands behind her back before moving to stand next to her ‘throne’, she turns sharply but doesn’t sit. The moonlight dances around her figure, floating in through the still open door to the balcony, it frames her and illuminates her, casting her in a halo of light and setting her figure into silhouette; casting the image of an impenetrable force, incapable of existing, but completely real all the same.

Three sets of inquisitive and puzzled eyes land on her, her face only partially visible from the cables Indra had previously lit, her face stark, emotionalist, controlled. The mask of Heda had slipped over her features and she was now the fierce ruler her people respected and loved.

Her eyes swept over the occupants of the room, travelling from Gustus’s hidden concern, Indra’s puzzlement and amusement at Titus’s current position, before finally landing on Titus; whose eyes were full of shock and confusion. Lexa clears her throat, all sets of eyes focusing on her even more intensely than before, she raises her right eyebrow before nodding slightly, giving any who wish to speak permission to do so.

While she waited for someone to speak she sat down in her throne, back rigid, posture immaculate, however outwardly still seemingly at ease with her surroundings and completely, irrevocably in control of the situation - though inside she was still a turmoil of emotions and was still ready to defend Clarke by tearing someone's throat out if the need should arise.

Lexa knew that Indra would not speak, it was not in her nature to question Heda or her decisions unless she thought it absolutely unprecedented, and as there was no love loss between her and Titus - of whom she thought voiced his opinion much too often - she would not question Heda’s motives for attacking the man. Gustus never much cared for decorum or politics when the council members weren’t around and as such had no issue with voicing his concern for her actions.

“Heda, what has Titus done to deserve your blade and vengeance?”

“He insulted the Sky People’s Commander, and as such me.”

Gustus took in her answer, pausing before he voiced his next question, mulling over if it were wise or not to do so; his curiosity won out in the end. “It wouldn’t happen to have anything to do with the fact that you reek of a Sky Person's scent would it?” his eyes glisten with mirth as he asks the question, Lexa can hear the teasing in his voice, but the concern is still there as well.

Indra’s interest in the conversation is peaked at the mention of the Sky Person’s scent that clings and lingers over Lexa, enveloping her own scent and mixing the two. She looks her Commander over as she awaits her reply, her eyes studying her for any hint of a lie.

When Lexa doesn’t respond right away both Gustus and Indra send side glances at Titus whose remained uncharacteristically quiet during the whole affair.

He is now standing upright, leaning against the wall for support, his legs still shaky with the unused adrenalin Lexa’s assault created. Both hands rest against the wall, supporting him further, the cut on his neck no longer bleeding, bruises marks from Lexa’s hand squeezing his neck beginning to appear against his complexion, they will be dark purple by the morning, standing out against his sun touched skin.

Lexa gives a small nod of her head indicating that what Gustus had said is the truth, that her anger towards Titus was to do with Clarke. “As I said he insulted the Sky People’s Commander-”

“Clarke ” Indra interjects, Lexa nods her confirmation and has to physically stop herself from visibly relaxing at the mention of her mate's name, from taking comfort and relief in the single syllable word.

“-With whom I’ve been working closely in negotiations. I’ve offered the Sky People to join the Coalition and become the Thirteenth Clan.”

The room falls into a stunned silence at Lexa admission that she wants the Sky People to become the Thirteenth Clan of the Coalition. None know what to say. Gustus looks proud, if not somewhat weary of the thought of integrating outsiders into their society, Indra looks impassive; somewhat curious and again weary of the prospect, Titus looks angry - most probably because he wasn’t consulted on the decision, that and his anger towards outsiders; which extends past the Sky People to members of other Clan’s that are not Trikru.

Titus goes to speak and Lexa silences him with a wave of her hand, his mouth gapes shut, his anger at being silenced like a common subject turning his face red. “You will not question my decision Titus, it is mine to make, and mine alone - I will bring it to the attention of the Clan Ambassadors at tomorrow's meeting, but I do not doubt that they will concede that it is the smart thing to do.”

He tries again, “But Heda if I-”

“No, you may not Titus. Your council is appreciated and has been helpful in the past but in this instance, it is not needed nor wanted.”

He looks at her bewildered, unable to fully comprehend what she was saying, but he just bows his head and says “As you command Heda.”

Lexa looks at the three of them again before speaking, “It has been a long day, I wish to rest before the assembly of the Ambassadors tomorrow.”

They all nod, Gustus and Indra slapping their right fist to their chest bowing slightly then disappearing from the room, however still most likely lingering outside the doors until Lexa exits to return to her bed chambers. Titus lingers for a moment before bowing his head slightly and sulking out of the room like a child denied dessert after eating their greens.

Lexa slumps down in her chair, feeling the tired weight of the day - of her position - crash down on her, her bones tired and weary. She sighs, wishing to be curled up in Clarke’s arms. Her limbs feel heavy and sluggish, she contemplates giving in to her fatigue and sleeping in her throne but decides against it as she would wake up poorly rested and stiff. Begrudgingly she pulls herself out of the throne, feeling as though she were a marionette on strings as she slumps over to the lite candles, distinguishing them one at a time, with each candle she snuffs out, her eyelids feel heavier and heavier, her movements laboured and slow. She allows herself this moment of solitary to indulge her feelings of exhaustion before she regains her posture and exits the room, unfazed when she finds both Gustus and Indra standing outside the room. She nods her goodnight to the pair before moving swiftly down the hall to her sleeping quarters.

She closes the door with the weight of her back pressed against it, her shoulders sag and her back slumps against the thick wooden panel. She allows it to hold up her weight and the weight of her life, her legs threaten to buckle under the pressure, all she wants is to stop fighting them and allow herself to sink down to the ground, down into her love’s arms. But she doesn’t give in. She can’t, not yet, not here. Maybe one day, when she and Clarke are together and free to just be, but for now she can’t; she must remain strong for her people and take solace in the fact that Clarke loves her, in all that she is and all that she’ll ever be. She steel’s herself, righting her slumped position and throws herself onto her plush mattress. She doesn’t bother to remove her clothing bar kicking off her boots, sending them flying off the edge of the bed. She closes her eyes, her final thoughts of Clarke and the life Lexa wishes them to have in the future, before succumbing to her battle with fatigue and allowing her mind to be dragged under into the deep abyss of sleep.

//

Lexa awakes alone in a cold dark room, her mind foggy and unclear. She’s unsure of where she is and panic rises in her chest as she reaches out to for Clarke - whom she’s become so accustomed to waking up to - and not finding her at her side. Her eyes shoot open to begin searching for her mate, when she takes in the familiar surroundings of her bedroom in Polis, the previous day’s events coming back to her, she looks to the balcony across from where her bed lies and sees slight slivers of silver moonlights receding back into the sky, she surmises that it must only be the early hours of the morning, she sighs with relief, relaxing back onto her bed.

Her mind drifts to thoughts of waking up with the Blonde, long blonde hair in waves crashing over her face and framing it with the glow of a halo, small strands sticking out that tickle Lexa’s face, Clarke’s tight grip on and around Lexa’s body only intensifying when she moves flexing her muscles for the morning, doing away with the sluggishness of sleep; Lexa muses over how similar to a Koala she is. Lexa thinks of how accustomed she’s become to waking due to an beyond uncomfortable increase in body temperature, but how she’d never move, just lay there awake either in Clarke’s arms or with the Blonde in her’s and wait till her body became accustomed to the heat enough to allow her mind to drift back into the depths of slumber.

She sighed missing her mate, she reaches out with her mind - though not meaning to - calling to Clarke, when she hears the sleepy rasp of Clarke’s voice she jumps a little, “Mhhh Morning beautiful.”

Lexa lets out a exhaled laugh, “Os deimeika gyon op meizen” *Good morning beautiful*

“What happened last night?”

Lexa thought for a minute, wondering if she should tell Clarke all that transpired. “One of my advisors, he doesn’t trust your people.” She pauses, “he insulted you - though indirectly - he commented on my scent and my being distracted, saying some foul things about you. My wolf and I lashed out physically towards him. He is not a wolf but human and cannot endure what we can… it was extreme but I couldn’t let him get away with insulting you - my love, my mate - or us, and what we have.” Lexa pauses again, “I almost told them - Titus, Gustus, and Indra - of us being bound, but with you not being here something told me to leave that out. I simply said that we’ve been working closely to introduce your people as the thirteenth clan in the collision.”

Clarke’s silent for a moment, “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Clarke, I would defend and protect you - even if only in honour - until my last dying breath.”

“Do you ever talk about anything other than your death?”

They both let out breathy laughs, lightening the mood, both minds feeling clearing after having cleared the air and any concern over what happened last night. They’re both quiet for a while longer after clearing the air; simply soaking in one another's spiritual presence, taking solace in the knowledge that they are thinking about one another and just there.

“Is it crazy to say that I’ve missed you? I know it’s been less than 24 hours but… I just feel whole when we’re together.”

Lexa’s heart tightens at the admission, she knows that neither of them finds it easy to be emotionally open, that it’s hard because of those they’ve loved and lost in the past.

“I know the feeling Hodnes.” Lexa breaths back.

Clarke just laughs, but when she speaks her voice is breathy and husky for another reason entirely, “two can hedplei gon dei pleiplei Heda” *two can play at that game Commander*

Lexa can feel Clarke’s smirk, it sends a shiver down her spine and makes her gulp down the lump that has formed in her throat. “Don’t start something neither of us can finish Clarke.” Lexa all but growls in a low predatory voice, arousal evident in her tone, but also is the warning.

She can feel Clarke shutter, as though she were right next to her, “Now look who’s not playing fair” she huffs, “First you say my name like that-”

Lexa smiles, trying to convey innocence in her tone, “Like what Hodnes? I don’t know what you’re talking about.” a full blown smile has now etched it’s way onto her face.

She can feel Clarke’s eyes narrowing, piercing her with a hardened blue gaze, “You know exactly what I’m talking about, how you click the ‘k’ and make it sound longer than one syllable-”

Lexa smiles a devilish smile, still feigning innocent of the apparent ‘crime’, “-that and your voice is riling both my wolf and myself up… your voice is incredibly hot under normal circumstances, let alone these ones.”

“And what exactly are these circumstances, Clarke?” Lexa asks with a smug satisfaction in her voice that Clarke was going to make her eat.

“The circumstances that you’re incredibly horny and turned on Lex.” Clarke’s voice a whisper laced with lust and Lexa could imagine her pupils blown wide. Her voice catches in her throat, she hadn’t expected Clarke to so direct, nor could she deny the things that nickname did to her when spoken from Clarke’s lips.

Lexa gulps down another lump in her throat, squeezes her eyes shut and begs for strength from no one, in particular, just anyone willing to offer it to her at this moment. She lets out a shaky breath before she opening her eyes again and responding to Clarke, “One of us needs to be responsible here. I have to be in a clan meeting, leading my people in important decisions, I can’t allow my mind to be distracted or clouded -”

“So let me help undistract you, Commander.”

Lexa call’s on that strength again, “No Clarke. I want to be with you, to feel you beneath me, begging me, clawing at my back, fingers tangled in my hair, falling apart beneath me - because of me. I want us to be together, with each other in every way.”

Clarke swallows thickly, “Ok Lex, I get it.”

“Thank you.”

Clarke laughs, “Just wait till you get home, I’ll jump you at the gate.”

They both laugh but apart of both of them knows it’s true, and that same part doesn’t care about the potential fallout of that action.

“We’ll speak later Clarke, have a wonderful day my love.”

“You too Lexa, good luck with the Clan Ambassadors. I love you.”

“I love you more.”

//

The representative Ambassadors of the 12 Clans were squabbling like five-year-olds, arguing back and forth, each trying to have their opinion heard by yelling over one another. Lexa just sat there and listened as each one tried to get her attention and make her listen to their argument, their point of view - which they thought superior to their peers, even those that had the same as them.

Lexa allowed them to argue amongst themselves for a time, hoping that with her silence they would eventually realise the childishness of their behaviour and calm down enough for her to speak - that however, didn’t happen. If anything her silence made them grow louder and more vivacious in their arguments. Finally Lexa had enough and raised her hand so that her elbow was resting on the armrest of her throne, her fingers lazily splayed in a stop motion, her face blank and emotionless (despite her wanting to scream at them that they were acting like children fighting over a toy that was none of their’s, and that in fact, that at this moment children would be more mature and tolerable). The Ambassadors stilled and silenced almost instantaneously once the Commander's hand was raised in the air, as though if they didn’t in one swift movement she could bring about the end of the world, befall their villages in a plague that would kill them all; they both feared and respected her because of her position and all that she has accomplished for their people.

“If you are all quite finished.” Lexa’s tone is chipped despite being low and gruff in warning, her irritation at their behaviour shining through despite her best attempts to bury it, “I would like to continue.”

The way she spoke was so regal and elegant despite her exasperation, so diplomatic and calm, it sent ripples of awe and respect through the air, filling the room. The Ambassadors all bow their heads slightly, indicating their acknowledgement and acceptance of her statement, their respect for her and her position, and their submission - their weaker wolves trying to appease their Alpha whose voice comes through Lexa’s, warning and annoyance at their pup behaviour, their wolves ego’s (who's more Alpha) preventing them from agreeing.

“Displays of dominance and Alphaness won’t be tolerated in Clan meetings, anyone who tries to use their influence again will be banished for a week; is that clear?”

Lexa's voice is deathly calm when she speaks now, no hint of annoyance or emotion present, and this terrifies her Ambassadors more so than if she were yelling at them. It’s the type of calm that appear before a storm, the one that lulls you into a false sense of hope and security for the days to come, the one that often times leads many to their deaths.

When no one speaks, simply nodding their heads Lexa gives one curt nod, “Good, then let us continue. Ambassador of Azgeda I believed you were speaking.”

“Em should laik de Azgeda Yu ogeda bow gon kos, not de Heda. Osir du not make treaties kom our enemies.” *It should be the Ice Nation you all bow for, not the Commander. We do not make treaties with our enemies.* He pauses before sniffing the air, “Or ses op emo begs.”*Or lay in their bed’s.*

Everyone is quiet as they look to their Commander, searching for any signs of weakness coming through. She remains seated, stone-faced, emotions on tight lockdown. She wants to rip him apart and defend Clarke, but she knows that now is not the time nor the place, so she remains silent.

The Ice Nation Ambassadors voice increases in volume as he continues his rant, “She sits before us and does not even deny it.” he points to Lexa, “She is no longer fit to be Heda.”

Lexa looks at the man and then to the other Ambassadors before speaking, “I have been with Skaikru for the past weeks negotiating their integration and unification with our people, and their admittance into the Coalition.” There is slight mumbling amongst the Ambassadors but all silence again she Lexa raises her hand. “It is what is best for both of our peoples, there won’t be a threat of war between us, we will benefit one another through trade and knowledge. I have been with their leader Clarke kom Skaikru teaching her of our ways and vice versa.”

Everyone is quiet in thought as they take in what Lexa has said when they all signal their acknowledgement and acceptance of her intentions to make Skaikru the 13th Clan of the Coalition the Ice Nation Ambassador looks around in anger and bewilderment. He blinks up at Lexa a look of shock, dread, and annoyance crosses his face - this hadn’t gone the way he’d hoped.

“Now I have a question for you Ambassador of Azgeda.”

He was too bewildered to do anything but stand in the centre of the Ambassadors where he’d made his move against Lexa. She waited for him to acknowledge her.

“Yes?” He knew what was coming, she was going to make a move against him now that his had failed. He hoped to stall her long enough to form a believable and coherent answer in the time that it took Lexa to give grounds for her question and ask it. Lexa knew it what he hoped for, her Advisors knew it, every Ambassador in the room knew it, hell even the guards present knew it. But Lexa gave the man - the youngest Ambassador for any of the Clans, yet with the hardest, cruelest, deadest eyes - a small smiles before asking her question. The man let out a sigh of relief at thinking he’d managed to pull one over on her, he thought it was subtle, but everyone in the room picked up on, even the non-wolves. Lexa smiles to herself, the energy in the room shifting, she was going to make him squirm.

“I ask you if the Ice Nation no longer wishes to be a part of the Coalition if the Ice Nation intends to declare war on Polis and the members of the Coalition, and finally I ask you now; are you prepared to die for treason.”

None of what Lexa had said was phrased as a question, it is all a statement of facts, everyone there knows it, even when she asked if he were prepared to die for treason, it was a statement of what was to come, not a question of what he thought nor his emotions.

The Ambassador for Azgeda looks shocked and terrified. He'd expected the support of the other Clans Ambassadors, and now that he was without it, he was in no position to refute Lexa's claims that the Ice Nation was trying to grab power. His jaw went slack, his face drained of colour, leaving him a faded shade of tan, - leaving him looking sickly - his Ice Nation scars protruding from his skin more predominantly at his lack of skin tone, the whiter he falls the more prominent they become. He’d expected to have time to form his defence, he’d expected her to talk about the army that marches, but she didn’t, she simply laid out the crimes of the Ice Nation - what was happening, giving him nothing to refute unless he brings up the army himself. She’d cornered him and he was done for, his only way out was to give further claim to what Lexa had said - his only defence was to further her claim that the Ice Nation wanted war and was marching on Polis, hammer the final nail in both his and his queens coffins - yet another act of treason.

“I…..I… Umm, we” he stammers, unable to form a coherent statement in his current state of shock and befuddlement. He took a deep breath, hoping that even if he mentions the army that with a decent explanation thrown in about their activity it will save him. “Why do you believe that the Ice Nation no longer wants to be a part of the Coalition?”

It was Titus that spoke rather than Lexa, voicing the reality of the Azgeda armies proximity to the Capital of Polis and their intrusion onto Trikru land, “Your army has moved into the boundary of Polis. How do you explain this other than an act of war against the Commander and the Coalition?”

The Azgeda Ambassador didn’t miss a beat in his reply, obviously now in the part of the conversation he had rehearsed and felt like he could save himself and his Queen. “No, those are just military exercises.”

Indra stepped forward as she spoke, insinuating the threat of what she was saying despite her soft tone, “Exercises? You crossed the border into Trikru land, an army within striking distance of our beloved Capital.”

The Ambassadors of the other Clans looked shocked and somewhat scared of the reality of what Indra was saying, the implications of the Ice Nation's actions falling heavily on them all. But the Ice Nation again had a quick response to defend the actions of his people's army.

“A mistake that was quickly rectified- ”

“The Ice Queen doesn’t make mistakes.” Gustus was the one to speak this time, his voice harsh like gravel, deep as the night sky sweeping over the land and swiftly taking the light, though he spoke just above a whisper everyone in the room could sense the power and anger in his voice, this coupled with the man’s size make the Azgeda Ambassador take the smallest of steps back. He was afraid, and so he should be. Gustus continued, his voice a little louder than before, “She makes threats.”

Everyone in the room fell silent, waiting for their Heda’s response to the conversation that had occurred around her, she had left her throne whilst her advisors and the Ice Nation Ambassador spoke amongst themselves, moving over to look out the balcony doors to her people below, she found strength in looking out upon them, she also found peace. The strength that would allow her to do what needed to be done to ensure their safety, the strength that no matter her decisions as long as they kept her people safe they were the right ones, and in this she found peace.

She turned back to the Ambassadors of the Clans, “There’s no need to argue about this again.” she stated, addressing everyone in the room before focusing solely on the Ice Nation’s Ambassador, “Please, come join me. Let us speak in private, I have a message for queen Nia.” her voice echoed throughout the room, the authority and calmness of her voice projecting it to everyone and leaving no question of who was in charge.

The Ice Nation Ambassador bowed his head before scampering after Lexa, following her out onto the balcony. “And I’ll happily deliver it.”

Lexa’s face turned from one of blank indifference to one that held all the fury and anger of the God’s, the change was so swift that the Ambassador didn’t notice the change until it was too late. Lexa let out a deep furious growl as she kicked the Ambassador with all her strength, her wolf howling at her doing so, her kick forced all the air from the man's lungs causing him to let out a grunt as she sent him soaring over the balconies crumbled concrete railing and off the side.

The man released a roar as he plummeted to the ground, silenced only when his body connected with the remittance of the old world road below, a loud crunching and splattering noise could be heard as all the people in the square below grew silent in their search for what had caused the noise and their astonishment over what had happened.

Lexa turned around to find that everyone had turned to her, her Ambassadors now standing from their seats, all froze mid-step, astonishment, fear, and awe on their faces and in their pheromones. Her grades were on high alert, clutching their spears and hands on their hip or behind their necks reaching for their swords ready to pounce on any danger towards their Heda. But their movements, too, were suspended and frozen as the took in the scene before them.

Lexa looked at the men and women that represented the different facets of her people, their culture, and what binds them. Her head was held high, her eyes alight with both triumph and daring, her wolf close to coming forward if need be. Both her eyes and voice illustrated her power and command when she said, “Would anyone else care to question my decisions?”

The Ambassadors came out of their haze and reclaimed their seats, lowering themselves silently back down, submitting to their Heda. At the slight Lexa let out a simply grunted, “Good.” She fully turned towards them moving swiftly and gracefully back to her throne saying, “Then let’s begin.” before she re-took her seat before her Ambassadors, looking out onto them with the regalness of the powerful leader she was.


	9. When in Polis (part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter didn't end up covering half the stuff that I wanted it to and ended up being more about Clarke and how everything was going for her in Arkadia with Lexa's absence. It was originally going to have a small amount of detail about this and mostly focused on her travelling to Polis and her time there... Guess I got a little sidetracked. I could have added more detail about Polis in this chapter but it just felt like it should be its own chapter, also finding good chapter breaks is hella hard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so I thought I should clarify the chain of events in this story as I haven't been very clear with the timeline or what has actually happened from the show in this story. So first the 100 never killed the 300 grounder soldiers, they had a few conflicts, but nothing that provoked a war or that would have made Clarke and Lexa meet before their 'chance meeting' - as a result Lincoln and O never meet before Clarke came back and Lincoln was never tortured. Clarke and the others were taken to mount weather and dismantled it from the inside - Bellamy was also taken (Finn is not a part of this story, sorry guys) - Jasper and Maya never fell in love in the mountain - I've decided not to add the Maya storyline because I already have Kane/Abby, Raven/Bell, Octavia/Lincoln and obviously Clarke/Lexa plus you know the non romatic replationships as well so it just seems a bit too much considering this story is already bigger than I ever imagined it would be. There is still conflict over what they did in the Mountain because there was still people that helped them try to escape, Clarke again takes all the blame for this but Bellamy was still there to pull the lever with her - by affect Lexa never betrayed them and Anya never died (as she wasn't captured because she didn't fight with the 100, and therefore didn't have to escape with Clarke.) Wells is only being mentioned now because I really don't plan anything (hence why you're getting this summary) but his story will be consistent with what happened on the show. Now Costia... I've thought a fair bit about whether or not to add her to this story, and if I did wither or not she'd be alive...To be honest I still haven't really made a decision about it, however, I will say that she is either not going to be present in the story or she will be but won't have died... I don't think I've missed anything but if there is anything you're confused about just let me know and I'll try to clarify it all, again sorry for my lack of forethought I really just didn't expect this story to take off or start going anywhere beyond a few chapters. 
> 
>  
> 
> NOTE: for those that have already read the chapter there has been a slight edit in Nia's character description to describe and accent as suggested by one of you, it's not a large edit and doesn't change anything so you don't need to read if you don't want to.

Clarke had been somewhat lost since Lexa went to Polis, her and Lincoln were training in physical combat, wolf skills, and the healer skills of his people in every spare moment Clarke could find. When she wasn’t training with Lincoln she was dealing with the needs of her people, talking with the heads of each specialised area as well as consulting with Lincoln and getting his input on what they should do to harness the natural resources that the earth provided. The camp was running smoothly, her and Bellamy were working cohesively and as one unit, their suggestions to the people unanimous. Her friends were trying to spend time with her, catching her up on what had been happening since she’d gone awol, however, they never actually asked her what happened with her and Lexa or where she’d been for so long. They respected that she’d tell them when she was ready.

 

But Clarke couldn’t face them, she could smell their discomfort, they knew something was different, ‘wrong’ with Clarke but they didn’t know what it was and it made them treat her differently, and it made Clarke treat them differently as well. She didn’t trust herself, not completely. Her control had come a long way, Lincoln was impressed with her progress, but Clarke still didn’t trust herself with her friends, with her people without Lexa there to help and comfort her.

 

It was one of the reasons she’d stayed in the sky box ever since being back, yes she had wanted to be with Lexa without prying eyes, and yes her old room didn’t feel like home, none of it did anymore - not after Lexa - but it was also to protect her people, to make sure they were safe whilst still being here.

 

What worried Clarke was that, even though her control had increased, she felt this pulling towards Lexa, this need to go to her, and an ach in her chest - in her entire being - at not following the instinct. But what frightened her more was that if she ever got lost in her thoughts she’d start moving, off towards the direction Lexa had disappeared in, moving unconsciously closer to where Polis presumably was, and to where Lexa was. It frightened Clarke because if she couldn’t even control her movement, creeping unconsciously closer to her mate, then how would she control her wolf if something triggered her to come forth? How would she control herself from lashing out if someone angered her?

 

All of these questions had made Clarke withdraw from her friends, from her people; only being with them if absolutely necessary. No, that wasn’t true, well at least not the whole truth. Yes Clarke was afraid of what might happen, but she was also ashamed of herself and her actions. She had sentenced her mother, her own mother to 100 lashes, yes it was less brutal to the alternatives, but she’d done it without a second thought, without hesitation, she’d let her anger at her mother for her father's death, for her being on earth, for her seeing all the death - the savagery - for being forced to make the decisions she’d made; she’d blamed her for it all, and she’d let her emotions allow her, to justify her actions.

 

Clarke thought back to the afternoon of her mother's punishment, * _Kane and Jackson untied her mother from the posts, carefully lowering her and wrapping their arms around her to support her weight, trying not to touch the blistered flesh on her back. They moved towards the medbay at an agonisingly slow rate, the two men all but carrying her mother. Clarke’s eyes never left the posts her mother had just been attached to, her gaze never wondering to the slow moving forms, she couldn’t allow herself to look, couldn’t allow herself to feel. Most people had cleared out before the lashings had ended, the rest fled from view as soon as the last lash had struck Abby’s flesh, the sounds still echoing off the large metal structure they called home before the last person had disappeared; the only people who remained were Bellamy, Octavia, Raven, Jasper, monty, and of course Lexa. Lexa hadn’t moved from the shadows where she’d taken up residence beside the gate during the lashings, watching Clarke with her impossibly green eyes, desperate to comfort her. Bellamy was the first of her friends to approach her, his movements small and timid at first, he moved like he was approaching a small animal backed into a corner trying to convince it that it had plenty of room and he wasn’t as big and imposing as he seemed. Clarke’s eyes didn’t move from the posts on his approach, nor when he was standing right next to her, she didn’t even acknowledge he’d moved to stand next to her. At first he didn’t speak and Clarke was grateful for that, all she needed was silent comfort, because she could tell that anything more would cause her to break. But silence wasn’t Bellamy’s strong suit, he was a man of action and inaction made him uncomfortable, so he reached out to Clarke, when she moved slightly as to be out of the way of his grasp his voice came out small and in a strangled sigh, “Clarke,” her name was a plea, a prayer, there was so much emotion in that sigh of a name and Clarke couldn’t handle it, not now. She lifted up her hand, still keeping her gaze fixed straight ahead, her eyes closed for the briefest of moments her breath coming out jagged and haunted, “Stop Bell. Just stop.”_

 

_“But Clarke I-”_

 

_“No Bell, you can’t fix this.”_

 

_Bellamy’s jaw clenched and his fists balled at his sides, he hated seeing his friend like this, the person that he knew to be so strong and that had helped him lead the 100, had helped him grow and be someone who he and they could be proud of, someone they could follow - not out of fear, but out of respect - he had to fix it, he had to fix this for his friend._

 

_His voice came out broken and weak when he spoke - defeated - “Please Clarke. Tell me what I can do.”_

 

_It was only now that Clarke allowed her gaze to drift over to him, she didn’t turn her head away from the post, but allowed her eyes to wander over him, her voice broke when she spoke, “Nothing, you can’t do anything Bell. I bare this so that they don’t have to, I do what I do to keep us safe, I do what I must to protect them all. That’s the way it’s been since we’ve landed, and it’s the way it’ll always be.”_

 

_Clarke felt her own heartbreak at the omission, she’d never said this out loud, even when she spoke to it about Lexa she’d never fully admitted that in order to protect her people she had to sacrifice small pieces of herself at a time, sometime the pieces are larger than others._

 

_Bellamy was about to try again but Octavia and Raven flanked him, Monty and Jasper slightly behind them, more uncomfortable with the situation than the others. Octavia lightly touched Bellamy’s left elbow gaining his attention before indicating that they should leave Clarke be; he looked like he was going to put up a fight before Raven placed her hand gently on his shoulder, his shoulders sagged in defeat as he allowed their friends to lead him away, leaving Clarke to watch the sun set behind the mountains and behind the polls she’d had her mother tied to for her punishment._

 

_One of Clarke’s favourite sites since landing on earth were the sun rises and sunsets, both uniquely different, but both just as breathtakingly beautiful; this night however, Clarke barely even noticed that the sun had set, that the ball of flames that ignited the sky and made it feel alive with light and flame had been extinguished, allowing the sky a reprieve from the fire it ignited. Clarke felt akin to the setting sun, all bright and vengeful in its beauty, setting all ablaze as it falls lower and lower in the sky, making those who see it envious of its beauty as it slowly disappears, making them yearn for it to stay longer before finally being snuffed out by the growing beauty of night._

 

_Lexa approached her, coxing her out of her dazed state and taking her back to their room, falling into a dreamless sleep in Lexa’s strong protective arms._

 

_//_

 

_Clarke had awoken not long after she’d fallen asleep, she felt goggry and her mind unfocused. She sat up rubbing her hands over her face as images of what had happened earlier entered her mind and refused to leave, she squeezed her eyes shut but that only made the images more vivid and more real. Her breath was shaky when she exhaled, she was unable to control her emotions, she knew what she had to do now. She got out of bed, pulling her pants and jacket on to fight the cold of the early morning, stopping before she opened the door she spoke out into the night, aware that Lexa was awake and was watching her, “I’ll be back soon, I just need to take a walk.”_

 

_Lexa’s unspoken question of ‘Can I come with you’ hung in the air between them before Clarke shook her head and sighed, “This is something I need to do alone.”_

 

_Clarke knew that Lexa understood this, but she also knew that Lexa cared for her deeply, something she wasn’t fully accustomed to feeling, and Clarke knew that her ‘rejection’ would hurt Lexa, she turned back towards the bed, crossing the small distance in a matter of seconds before she stood before Lexa. She placed her hands on either side of Lexa checks and kissed the top of her head, mumbling as she pulled away, “I love you Lexa.”_

 

_Before Lexa could do anything she turned on her heels and escaped out the door, but not before she heard Lexa murmur, “And I you Clarke.”_

 

_Clarke soundlessly navigated her way through the Ark’s corridors and passages, briskly making her way to her destination. She stood frozen outside listening. Trying to find a reason to turn around and leave, but she only heard one heartbeat inside the room and it was soft and slow, the heartbeat of someone in slumber, her own heartbeat was fast and erratic with the prospect of entering the room. She psyched herself up to go inside numerous times, but each time her feet betrayed her nervousness and remained firmly planted on the floor, rendering her immobile._

 

_She took a deep calming breath through her nose holding it before exhaling through her mouth, her hand moved to the sensor pad and the door whooshed open, the slightest sound of the movement of hinges and air compressors in the door when it opened startling Clarke, too loud for her sensitive ears and the loiter behaviour she was expressing. When she stepped into the room the only sound was the soft breath of the sleeping form on the bed in the corner and the soft beeping of medical machines hooked up to said person._

 

_Clarke felt her eyes prick with tears, this was her doing, she was the reason for this. Stealthily she crossed the room, moving to the foot of her mother's bed, grabbing her chart, Clarke saw that her mother was on some heavy painkillers and was sedated, she wouldn’t be awake for hours, Clarke was relieved._

 

_She moved and took a seat next to her mother's shrunken form in the medbay bed, she looked tortured even in sleep, not at peace or young like Lexa, her face wasn’t relaxed but scrunched up as though in pain. Clarke reached over and pressed the button that released more painkillers, a few moments later she saw her mother's features relax, her frown becoming less pronounced, her face slackening as the painkillers offered her sweet relief, if only for a short time._

 

_Clarke sat with her mother for what felt like hours, her hand wrapped around her mother's offering silent comfort and support despite the guilt she felt at the act giving her some semblance of peace of reprieve for what she’d done. Her eyes became more and more blurred as more time passed before her vision was completely obscured with unshed tears. The dam finally broke when her mum squeezed her hand, it felt so familiar, so natural, so supportive that Clarke couldn’t take it. A sob tore its way from her throat and darkened the air around them, the sound resonating off the walls._

 

_More sobs feel from her lips before she couldn’t blink the tears away anymore and allowed them to fall down her cheeks unchecked. “I’m so sorry.” she sobbed barely above a whisper to her unconscious mother, “I - I… I’m so sorry. I thought… All I’ve ever wanted… All I’ve done… ” Clarke’s speech had become inarticulate, her sobs preventing her from forming any thing close to a coherent sentence. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes, trying to calm herself enough to say what she needed to._

 

_When she opened them again she felt a renewed sense of determination to finish what she had to tell her mother. She looked down at her sleeping form and tried again, speaking both softly and slowly to the sleeping woman, “I’ve done everything in my power to protect us all, to keep us safe and alive since you sent us down here; to allow us to survive. I’ve done so many bad and unforgivable things to accomplish it, I’ve killed hundreds of people in mount weather, I fought and killed countless grounders when we first landed on the ground, I became something I never wanted to be, I became someone I never knew I could; I became death.” Clarke paused willing herself to stay strong and to finish what she needed to say, “I have done so many indescribable things to survive that I thought I could do this, I thought I could live with doing this to you. But I can’t, not even after everything you’ve done. Not after you turned dad in and got him killed” her voice broke and she paused again, willing the last of her strength to keep her strong for the last of what she needed to say, “-not after you let them take me away, not even after you sent me and 99 others down here to die, or even because you put the lives of every single person in this camps in danger just to get me back home - when you put the lives of the people I’ve given so much of myself up for to protect in danger. Because even after all of that you are still my mum and I still love you, and there is still apart of me that feels, I thought it was gone, but Lexa helped me find it again, helped me realise that I could feel more than just anger. I’m so sorry that I did this to you, but I’ve given too much of myself away just to let you get everyone killed because you were feeling protective; I wish it had been different - that I’d been different, or that you were - but it is what it is, I just hope that one day you’ll be-able to forgive me.”_

 

_Clarke saw a stray tear fall down the side of her mother's cheek and wondered of the woman had heard her or if she were just in pain, Clarke thought it must be the latter because how could she hear her if she were so doped up on painkillers and sedatives?  She squeezed her mother's hand once more before leaving the room. She got back to hers and Lexa’s room, discarding her clothing and reclaiming her spot next to Lexa on the bed, instantly strong protective arms wrapped around her, shielding her from the cruelty of reality. She sighed, feeling lighter now that she’d said what she needed to say to her mother, even though she would never know, Clarke knew, and one day she’d tell her mother when she wasn’t unconscious and hopped up on drugs, but for tonight it was enough for her to fall back against Lexa and let sleep claim her.*_

 

Clarke had gone back to see her mother every night she’d been in the medbay, going in the wee hours of the morning when she was sure no one would be there and Abby would be in a drug induced sleep unable to know that Clarke had ever been there - she’d gone earlier once and found Kane asleep in the chair at Abby’s side, the site both comforted Clarke and made her insides ache, ache for her dad, ache for being able to curl up next to her mum like when she was younger, both simultaneously offering and receiving comfort. Clarke still couldn’t bare to look at her mother though, - the guilt and anguish she feels over her decision is still there, as resent as ever - she knew it was going to be a long time before she was able to say the things she said to her mother when she's in a drug induced sleep to her when she is fully conscious and able to not only listen but interject and retort. Clarke just wasn’t ready, she wasn’t strong enough, she was too afraid.

 

Clarke wanted to clear her head so she decided to go spend some much needed time with Raven, she’d mostly avoided the girl since being back, though everyone had given her her space she knew that the first one to ‘crack first’ and ask question Clarke didn’t want to answer would be Raven. She felt bad for avoiding someone she considered such a close friend, but up until now she didn’t feel prepared - mentally, emotionally, or physically - for the inquisition going to see Raven would no doubt ensure.

 

She wondered down the hallowed halls of the Ark, feeling out of place in the now alien structure. The metal walls and constant ‘whooshing’ of the air vents, the sound of steps, breaths, heartbeats all reverberating in the enclosed space, all use to and should still bring her comfort - the feeling of home, of safety. But it doesn’t. If anything all the things that she use to take comfort in back when the Ark was in the sky now set her on edge, it is unnatural, synthetic. The air from the vents tastes more staile in comparison to the clean fresh air the ground provides.

 

Since landing on the ground nothing has been the same for Clarke; who she was, what she was, what means anything to her - it has all changed. And she doesn’t know how to make things go back to how they were, back to when she was comforted by the constant humming of the air vents and the echoing of the walls, but most importantly she doesn’t know if she wants to. Sure back then things were more simple for her, she was just a girl who loved to draw and dreamed of the earth, but she didn’t know any of the people she now considered family, the people she cares for the most, the people who have seen her grow. But she also didn’t know all this death.

 

But when Clarke thinks about it, truly thinks about it, she changed the moment her father was killed, because that is when she first knew death, when she first tasted it, when it first got its claws into her and began to consume her soul. Because she’d thought it was Wells that got her dad killed, and by extension her. Even now that she knows that wasn’t the case, that was when death gasped her, pulled her in and made her its own.

 

Everything about the Ark remained Clarke of death; it was cold, lonely, and alien. She thinks that's one of the reasons she loves the ground so much. It is so vibrant and alive, it is bursting and tethering with life - even if a bit mutated from the radiation the bombs left behind - and it made her feel alive. The people made her feel alive. Lexa made her feel alive. Lexa was putting her back together piece by broken piece and allowing her to breath again, to be more than a leader to her people, more than the girl who brought down the mountain and knows death as an old acquaintance, she treats her like home.

 

Clarke had been so consumed in her thoughts that she’d just walked into Raven's work station without pausing to knock or listen to see if she were in the middle of something. Clarke strolled into the room, not bothering to make her presence known until she rounded the boards Raven had obviously been working on, she began speaking, “You better be decant Reyes, I’ve seen your ass enough to last me a life-” Clarke had been joking, but upon rounding the bored she stops dead in her tracks and her voice cuts off immediately at the sight infront of her.

 

Her eyes had grown wide and began to bulge out of her skull, a look mirrored on the two faces that stared back at her, shock evident on all three faces. None of them reacting, all frozen in place. Clarke’s eyes went between the astonished faces of Raven and Bellamy, going back and forth looking for something, waiting for something. Clarke was the first to snap out of the shock haze they all appeared to be in, clearing her throat she turned mumbling out that she’d come back later.

 

Clarke moved like a bat out of hell, rounding Ravens work boards with speed she shouldn’t have as a human, but she didn't care about discretion just then, she needed to get out of there before it became more awkward. She heard the rustling of clothing being thrown hastily one and the messy fumbling of belts clanking as the owner tried to put it back on, _great_ she thinks _now my inhuman wolf hearing works,_ she hears Raven call out to her, “Clarke! Clarke wait!” accompanied with more fumbling and crashing noises as the girl tried to catch Clarke before she can run away.

 

Clarke didn’t wait, though, she continued racing towards the door to her salvation, but in her haste she didn’t take in her surroundings, fumbling over a tool box and stray tools Raven had left out, surprised by the object connecting with her shin, and what she’d just walked in on, Clarke didn’t have time to react; she fell all limbs in a tangled heap in front of the door, she managed to twist herself around whilst falling causing her to land on her ass rather than her face, she cursed in both English and Trigedasleng once her ass connected with the metal of the structure beneath her.

 

Whilst she tried to regain her composure and continue her attempts to flee Raven and Bellamy stood before her, now fully clothed (thankfully) even if their t-shirts were backwards and inside out, it was better than seeing either of them naked, she shutters at the mental image now ingrained into her memory to haunt her. They both stood there frozen, unsure of what to do next, they’d thought they’d have to continue chasing after Clarke though the Ark, now that they’ve caught her both were struck silent, unsure of what to say.

 

Clarke looked at both of her friends and saw mirrored tension coiling in their bodies, their muscles coiled springs ready to burst. They stood before her, looking at her sprawled on the floor, waiting for the other shoe to drop, for Clarke to do something, to explode, anything. She surprised them both when she placed her weight on her elbows and smirked up at the pair. She was going to milk this, glad that she won’t be forced to answer Raven’s questions just yet. She let her head loll to the side, eyeing the pair as if she were sizing them up, “Sooo-” she teased smile on her face moving her head so that it was straight again, “When did this happen?” Her smile was wide as she saw a range of emotions flash across both Raven and Bellamy's faces; confusion, embarrassment (turning Bellamy’s tanned cheeks a deep shade of red), arrogant satisfaction (this particular emotion only on Raven's face, a smirk playing on her own lips as she looked down at Clarke), before finally landing on affection for the girl that lay in a piled heap on the floor. Clarke continued to look up at her friends awaiting a response, Bellamy squirmed slightly under her gaze, he turned to Raven before mumbling, “I think this is more of a girlfriends conversation.” before he looked back down at Clarke, cheeks still alight with his embarrassment, he nodded to her quickly before skipping around her and feeling out the door.

 

Clarke looked back up at Raven, “Boys” she sighed, “Such cowards.” Ravens face broke out into a smile, appreciation and thanks for Clarke’s light hearted response to the situation shone through Ravens usual russet tired eyes, alight with life and humour glowing a rich caramel. She laughed in response, the pair's eyes locking. Once again Clarke was the one to break the silence that fills between them, “Didn’t I ask you a question?” She inquired puckishly.

 

Raven sighed smiling down at her friend, “Ha, where to begin?”

 

Clarke laughed at her response, it was an unbridled laugh of pure happiness, the kind she hadn’t had since Lexa had left for Polis, since even before she returned to camp, her smile had grown enormous when she replied, “The beginning is often a good place.” Both girls were sent into a fit of laughter at that, Raven falling to the ground in front of Clarke, both leaning into one another as they let their laughter consume them. It was the kind of laughter that bubbled the longer you let it go on, that grew to be about nothing more than they fact that you were laughing, it was the kind of laughter that became about nothing and about everything, it was the kind of laughter that helped people cope with impossible situations, starting off small and then developing into something more. The longer they laughed the more their sides hurt, they both collapsed side by side on the floor breathless yet still unable to control the now manic laughter. It was the kind of laughter that healed, that let you deal with all the shitty things in life and find a way past it. They stayed side by side laughing at the absurdity of it all until their sides ached and their cheeks stained with tears.

 

//

They stopped laughing some time ago, moving off the cold hard floor in favour of Ravens old couch in the corner, both girls collapsing on it and each other. Clarke suddenly gasps, “Please tell me you and Bell haven’t done it on this couch.” her smirk confidant but also a little forced as the question was both a joke to tease Raven and an actual question, one she wasn’t sure she wanted to know the answer to. Ravens own eyes were alight with mirth, her own smirk taking over her features, as she opens her mouth to reply Clarke puts up her hand and instead says, “Forget it, I don’t want to know. Ignorance is bliss and all that.” Raven just laughs at her friend, the feigned horror on her features, and the forced shutter that racks her body as she says, “This couch is so comfy, can’t have you ruining it for me with that.”  she said scrunching her nose up at the thought of Raven and Bellamy having sex.

 

They sit in silence for a moment, just enjoying one another's company, enjoying the simplicity and the ease with which they can joke around with one another, how it all happened so seamlessly. They soaked in each other's steady presence, it had been too long. Even before Clarke had left that morning weeks ago she had been withdrawn from her friends and too often avoided them because of what had to be done at the mountain - what she had to do - and how it plage her. She laughed to herself, it was because of the mountain that she’d been out hunting, trying to clear her head, it was because of the mountain that she’d meet Lexa. The universe worked in mysterious ways she thought.

 

Clarke’s face turned somber when she faced Raven next, her voice losing its teasing shine, becoming serious, “Do you care about him?” She asked voice soft and supportive but there was also a hint of something neither one could pinpoint, protectiveness perhaps. She cared deeply for both Raven and Bellamy and didn’t want to see either of them get hurt, least of all by each other.

 

“Yes.” Raven said without hesitation, Bellamy was first and foremost her friend and she cared for him deeply, even before their relationship became physical. Clarke nodded, mostly to herself, she knew Raven would respond this way but she had to make sure. She knew that her next question would be harder for her to answer however.

 

“Is it serious?” Clarke held her breath as Raven became thoughtful for a moment, thinking over how to phrase her response to properly describe what her and Bellamy have. It wasn’t just fun, she knew that, it may have started out that way for both of them but it was more now. She just didn’t know what more meant for them.

 

She sighed, looking into the deep sky blue of Clarke’s eyes, noticing the ring of gray that now encircled the girls pupil - she couldn’t remember ever having seen that in Clarke’s clear sky blue eyes before, but perhaps her eyes changed colour, that was a thing right? - she shook her head, going back to her original train of thought of how to describe what she and Bell had, “We’re… I don’t know. It started off as something fun, something we both needed and wanted, but now…” she trailed off frowning at herself unable to finish the thought. Clarke understood though and didn’t push her friend. She rested her hand on top of Ravens showing her support and understanding of the situation and Raven was grateful that they didn’t need words, that Clarke understood that this was something she and Bellamy would have to sort out in their own heads before they discussed it with each other let alone anyone else.

 

A comfortable silence enveloped the room, Clarke was on the precipice of sleep as she lay on the small couch her own limbs intertwined with Raven’s, that is until said friend decided to shatter the peaceful semblance of the room by speaking in a mischievous tone, mimicking Clarke’s mirth and words from before when she questioned her and Bellamy before he’d fled, “Sooo, you and Lexa huh?” Raven clicked her tongue to further her point.

 

Clarke groaned, so close to falling into the first peaceful and effortless sleep since Lexa left. She knew it was coming, the questions about where she’d been, what happened, and most importantly to her noisey friend why she stayed gone - Lexa. But she hadn’t expect to be thrown in the deep end per say, she’d expected Raven to work her way up to Lexa, but like always Raven Reyes was a loose cannon, with the ability to surprise you and throw you off guard in an instance. Clarke should have expected it really, that Raven would dive right in, though she’d hoped she’d be proved wrong for once, unfortunately she didn’t have such luck.

 

She sighed, just wanting to be claimed by the emptiness that was sleep, “Can we not? I’m too tired to talk about this now.”

 

“Nah uh, I talked, now it’s your turn to spill Griffin.” Raven paused expecting that this would be enough to make Clarke start talking, when she remained silent Raven sighed exasperatedly, “Come on Griffen I’m waiting.”

 

Clarke sighed, “Fine.” Raven squealed victorious and Clarke rolled her eyes, “What do you want to know Reye’s?”

 

Clarke regretted it as soon as she’d said it, she should have known where Raven’s mind would go, “How’s the sex?” Raven asked tone serious before she burst into a fit of giggles.

 

Clarke remained silent, intending to ride out Raven and her inquisition without giving in to the other girl. When Ravens fit of giggles ended abruptly at having realized that Clarke wasn’t laughing with her she made an effort to lock eyes with the blonde, tone serious, face void of the smirk that had previously been in place, “You care about her.” it wasn’t a question but Clarke answered anyway without missing a beat.

 

“Yes.”

 

Raven looked at her, studying her as if she were a new theory Raven had discovered and wanted to put into practice but couldn’t quite figure out how to transfer the numbers from theoretical into a physical experiment.

 

“I-” Clarke paused, unsure if she should admit this to her friend but decides she has enough secrets and she doesn’t want this to be one. “I love her Rae. I love her so much that it scares me sometimes. When I think of a life that doesn’t have her in it, even theoretically, something in me breaks and I can’t breath, I feel as though I’m no longer in earth's gravity and that I’ll just float away, back into space to float there aimlessly, alone forever - because she is my anchor, she is what keeps me firmly on the ground, she’s what stops me from floating away.” She pauses “She keeps me together, she holds all the broken pieces in place, she makes me feel whole again… even after everything. She makes me feel at home, safe and content.”

 

Clarke doesn’t need to explain what she’s referring to, Raven knows the toll Mt. Weather had on Clarke, what it took from her, what it cost her. Raven had shifted them while Clarke had been talking so that they sat across from each other on the couch cross legged staring at one another. Clarke thinks that Raven isn’t going to say anything and is about ready to get up and leave, she is bone tired after her afternoon with Raven, both emotionally and physically spends and is ready to pass out on her bed. She stands and moves past Raven who remained seated, brow furrowed in thought, Clarke's about to leave the room when Raven speaks, halting her movements.

 

“You deserve that Clarke. After everything you’ve done to keep us alive you deserve to be happy, to have someone that not only makes you happy but that keeps you together, someone that doesn't judge you for the decisions you’ve made despite making them for them. Someone that makes you feel whole. You deserve someone who is home to you”

 

Clarke can feel tears brimming her eyes, her voice is shakey when she speaks, thick with emotion, “Thank you.”

 

Raven stands up and walks over to her, standing behind Clarke she rests a hand on her shoulder, “You don’t have to thank me Clarke, it is all of us that need to thank you.”

 

Clarke lets out a shaky breath, trying to get her emotions under control before she turns to Raven, who envelops Clarke in a tight hug, holding her close as if she were afraid that if she let out or eased her grip she’d disappear into the night, never to return. They stay like this for some time, both holding back tears, sniffling as some escape despite the effort.

 

Raven speaks quietly not dearing to speak any louder because it might make not only her words but Clarke's reply all the more real, her voice muffled by golden locks surrounding Clarke’s neck and Clarke knew that without her wolf hearing she’d have likely missed what the other girl said. “You’re leaving aren’t you? When she comes back, you’re not staying in Arkadia.”

 

“No it isn’t my home anymore, even with Lexa here it didn’t feel like home. It feels foreign and alien - suffocating - after being on the ground - _Living_ on the ground.”

 

Raven nods pulling away, “What about being Chancellor, about leading our people? You were voted in.”

 

Clarke nods, “I know, but I have a plan that will enable me to still serve our people, to still lead them, all the while being where I want to be.”

 

Raven looks at her, confusion dawning her featured as she tries and fails to decipher what plan Clarke had managed to create that would allow her to get what she wanted whilst not abandoning their people. Clarke smiles at her, eyes half closed with fatigue and the need to sleep, yet still alive and vibrant with the new found hope that she could have it all.

 

She could feel her cheeks burning from smiling so hard, the look mimicked on Raven’s face, and the energy in the room change as Raven all but vibrated in front of her, her enthusiasm for Clarke’s plan apparent and growing as she laid it out before her, as she told her how she’d remain a leader to her people - remain who she was - whilst still getting the freedom and happiness she wanted so badly.

 

Raven whistled, “That’s a pretty solid plan Griffin.” Clarke beamed at her, explaining her plan to Raven, going over how it’s work made her believe more and more that she’d manage to get what she wanted, that finally life would give her a break and allow her to be happy. She continued to smile, her cheeks aching at the effort, this is the most the muscles had been used in a long time, and Clarke couldn’t find it in herself to feel bad for being happy, she was healing, she was allowing herself to live again.

 

//

 

It had been three days since Lexa had voiced the idea of the Sky People joining the Coalition, three days of arguments going back and forth of whether the Sky People should or shouldn’t be allowed into the Coalition. Lexa had stayed out of the argument for the most part, appearing detached, disinterested, and above all else unbiased to the situation. The only time she’d intervened was when it looked as though those that were willing to let them join the Coalition would be persuaded otherwise.

 

_*The voices arguing for the Sky People's integration and unification into their people and the Coalition began to quieten and dwindle in numbers, the only two Ambassadors that continued to argue for the Sky people’s inauguration were those from Floukru and Trikru. Lexa was becoming angered by this sudden shift and the lack of her people's ability to see past their fear and look towards the future - it had been the same when she’d proposed the idea of the Coalition, but she’d done it and she’d do it again. Lexa raised her hand in a quick and precise movement, until then she’d been almost unmoving taking in the scene around her, so her movement caused everyone to go silent, watching their Commander and waiting._

 

_Lexa looked at the men and women that represented the interests of her people from the different Clans, she studied them, taking them in, making them squirm under her intense gaze before she spoke, “A unification with the Sky People will be more beneficial to our own people than if we leave them as an independent entity.” She paused making sure everyone is listening and hanging on her every word, “They posses the knowledge and technology that the mountain men did, they are smart and strong despite being clumsy and loud when wandering the woods and would make a formidable enemy.” She pauses once more before driving her point home, “They also posses someone of great power and strength, someone whom you all fear, the posses Wahanda.”_

 

_Gasphs and whispers ascend from the Ambassadors, Lexa raises her hand again to silence them, “Yes, the rumors you have heard are true, Clarke leader of the Sky People vanquished the mountain and killed the mountain men, she is death and she Commands it. Now you understand why it is in our people’s best interest to align ourselves with the sky people, they posses not only the knowledge and skill to control the mountain if we were to engage in war with them, but also the legendary Wahanda Commander of death.”_

 

_The Ambassadors were quiet, contemplating what Lexa had said, all seemingly have come to their scenes and know that this would be what is best for their people, all except the new Azgeda Ambassador who chose to speak up, “If you think that they would claim the mountain and attack why would we want to bring them into the Coalition? Why would we want to show them our ways, our weaknesses if they could still attack us?”_

 

_Lexa had to suppress a growl, she had known this was coming, but that didn’t make it any less annoying when it did, “The Sky People won’t use the mountain if they are apart of the Coalition, they won’t have a need for it. The only time they would is if they were left to defend for themselves against us - a seemingly large and irremovable force.”_

 

_This Ambassador from the Ice Nation was just as arrogant and cocky as the first, smirking at Lexa before saying, “How do you know?”_

 

_Lexa had to placate her own ego and wolf before answering, she would win this battle with her wit and mind, not her anger and fists. “Wahanda has told me that the mountain has a self destruct mechanism in it, as part of our agreement for them to join the Coalition they may take medical, food and material supplies from the mountain - under the supervision of Nyko, Gustus and Indra - and then must destroy the mountain once and for all.”_

 

_All the Ambassadors seems pleased at this news, some even sink further into their seats, relaxing. The Ice Nation Ambassador goes to speak again and Lexa has had just about enough of him, she wonders if it would be taken as an act of war to kick two Ambassadors from the same nation off of her tower in the span of a week. Before she has to make that decision however, the Ambassadors of the other nations speak up as one, “Enough. Prince Roan. Your questions have been asked and answered, your Clan does not already carry favour with Heda, do not make it worse for yourself by making further insolent remarks and placating to your Queen’s demands.”_

 

_Roan looks at Lexa before bowing his head, “My apologies if I insulted you, Heda, you know what happens if Nia feels her orders have not been fulfilled.”_

 

_Lexa nods her acknowledgement of what Roan says, not wishing to think further on the matter and let memories of the past consume her.*_

 

Lexa addressed her Ambassadors quickly wanting this meeting to end as soon as possible, there was only one thing they needed to discuss this morning and she was going to get right to the point, “All those in favour of the Sky People becoming the 13th clan of the Coalition, becoming Skaikru, raise your hand now.” 11 of the 12 Ambassadors raise their hands instantly, the only one who wavers is Prince Roan of the Ice Nation, Lexa looks at him, studying him before speaking, “You are the next leader of your people, you need to start thinking about what kind of leader you want to be and what decisions _you_ think will most benefit your people.” Lexa says it so softly, she’s not insinuation, not manipulating, just stating the facts as they are, “What do you want to be remembered for Prince Roan?”

 

He looks at her as though she holds all the answers to the questions and problems swirling around in his head, he thinks of how they use to play before his mother forbade it, he thinks of how all Lexa ever wanted was for their people to be happy and safe - at peace. He sighs before raising his hand, he is doing this for his people, the consequences be damned.

 

Lexa allows the smallest of smiles to pull at her lips, “Then it is decided, a rider will be sent to inform Skaikru and bring their leaders plus their chosen representative back here for the ceremony.”

 

//

 

The meeting is adjourned soon after it is announced that Skaikru would be added as the 13th Clan of the Coalition and a rider sent to collect them. Lexa waits patiently for the Ambassadors to congratulate her and exit the room, they are taking far too long for her liking. She has meet with all of the Ambassadors when she is approached by Roan of Azgeda, “Congratulations Heda, you got your thirteenth Clan.”

 

“Thank you for the support of the Ice Nation Ambassador Roan.” Lexa gives him a small smile, she remembers their time as children and the friendship that they had until his mother realised that no political advantage would be afored to her from any relationship formed between the two.

 

Roan returns her smile, hesitant in his reply, “Thank you for the opportunity to serve my people.”

 

Despite all that has happened in the years since they were companions and friends Lexa can still see the boy who was lonely because of his ruthless mother, the boy who wanted nothing more than to be normal and have a friend, the boy who wanted no more violence in the Ice Nation, the boy who like Lexa wanted a safe home at peace. She doesn’t hesitate in her reply, meaning every word of it, “You are worthy your people’s faith and trust, you are the leader they both need and deserve; Yu gada in emo haihefa.” *you are their king*

 

Roan nods to her, his eyes wide with gratitude for what she said, eyes wet with tears that will never be shed and emotions that haven’t been felt in years. Roan leaves the room, following the other Ambassadors back to their designated chambers or down to the city, Lexa isn’t really concerned with which one they chose to do, she has their support and for now she has more important things to deal with than where her Ambassadors spend their time.

 

Indra and Gustus had left sending her looks of approval and admiration, the only person left in the room with her was Titus. She knew that she had to deal with him before Clarke and her people got here; otherwise things might go terribly wrong.

 

“Titus, glong raun Ai won tika.” *Titus, join me for a moment.*

 

“Sha Heda.”

 

They walked onto the balcony that just days ago Lexa had kicked the Ambassador of Azgeda off, she looked out over the city at their feet, the silhouettes of figures that lay below - seeing part of the lives they lead, touching them in the most immense way by never meeting most, them never knowing what the Commander knew of them, what she saw, what she does; just knowing that she keeps them safe.

 

“Titus you do not agree with my decision to bring Skaikru into the Coalition.”

 

“I would never-”

 

“It wasn’t a question Titus, I know you think my decision foolish, I know you believe it the wrong one, but it is done.” They’re both silent as they observe the lives of their people going about their day without them even knowing that they are being watched, that their lives are being observed. “The only question I have is what will you do?”

 

“Nothing. I will do nothing to stop Skaikru becoming apart of the Coalition.”

 

“No, you won’t. Nor will do harm Skaikru in any way in the future-”

 

“Heda-”

 

“Promise me, Titus, give me your word.”

 

Titus clenches his jaw, working it as he grinds his teeth. Swallowing his pride Titus agrees with an indignant sigh, “Sha Heda, Skaikru will kom op no bash op kom Ai. Yu don Ai telon.” *Yes Heda, Skaikru will come to no harm from me. You have my word.*

 

Lexa looks to Titus looking for any signs of deception when she sees none cross her advisor's features and can sense no change in his pheromones she releases a breath she’d been holding, preparing herself for the worst.

 

“That is all, you may leave.”

 

He gives Lexa a curt bow before exiting the room, leaving her alone on the balcony to take in the sights and noises below. She takes a few deep breaths, both calming and preparing herself. She needed to talk to Clarke, inform her about the outcome of the meetings and that a rider was on his way, but she also just wanted to talk to her love, they hadn’t spoken since her first day back in Polis. Her time had been consumed with delegation and arguments during the day, and fitful restless sleeps during the nights. Neither her nor Clarke had had time to contact the other, or when they did it went unanswered.

 

She was a ball of restless energy when she reached out to Clarke, calling to her mind, to the place only they could reach through their bond. _“Clarke, are you there?”_

 

 _“Lexa.”_ it was a breathless sigh deep with a husked tone of  voice, _“I’ve missed you.”_

 

Lexa smiled, she was enamoured that she could be both simultaneously be turned on and brought to her knees in just a few words by Clarke. _“As have I my love. But it hasn’t all been for nort, the Ambassadors agreed to Skaikru becoming the thirteenth Clan of the Coalition. A rider has been sent to inform your people and collect yourself, Bellamy, and your chosen Ambassador and bring you to Polis for the unification ceremonies.”_

 

 _“You’re kidding me? You did it?”_ Clarke all but squealed, Lexa couldn’t help the shit eating grin that overtook her face and suspected that a similar grin if not a mirror imaged one would be found on Clarke’s face at this exact moment. 

 

 _“What, didn’t you think I could do it?”_ Lexa teased, tusking at the end to show her displeasure at Clarke’s lack of faith, _“I’m hurt Clarke, you’ve truly wounded me.”_

 

 _“I’m sorry babe, but if you’re lucky I’ll kiss your wound better when I get to Polis.”_ Lexa could hear the flirtatious tone in Clarke’s voice and could hear the subtle shift in the tamber, her voice had become thicker taking on a richer and deeper tone, fill of desire. Lexa could feel her body reacting to the change, a deep growl resonating through her entire body, her pupils dilating her wolf calling to Clarke’s.

 

When she spoke again her own voice had taken on a deeper texture and was full of desire and warning, she strained to keep her words even, _“You shouldn’t make promises if you don’t intend on keeping them Clarke.”_

 

Lexa could hear the glint in Clarke’s voice when she replied, _“I’m a woman of my word, if I promise something I intend on following through Lexa.”_

 

Clarke’s confession sent chills down Lexa’s spine and quaking throughout her body, making her crave Clarke in the most primal of ways. _“I need you Clarke.”_

 

Clarke could hear the whine in Lexa’s voice and struggled to muffle her responding groan at hearing her love so immersed in her need. She was breathless when she spoke and her voice broke despite her attempts at controlling it _“Soon.”_

 

 _“Soon isn’t soon enough.”_ Clarke let a small smile pull at her lips, Lexa all but growled her reply and Clarke knew that they had some serious catching up to do when she arrived in Polis.

 

//

 

Clarke had been pacing ever since Lexa had ended their conversation, she didn’t want to wait for the messenger to arrive to leave, but she couldn’t very well leave for Polis till there presents was requested otherwise everyone would know that something was amiss. Clarke had opted to waiting outside so that as soon as the rider arrived things could get moving. Raven and Octavia were seated at a table nearby, chatting about things that were going on around the Ark, Ravens new inventions (that none of them really understood what they did or what Raven was saying but still listened anyway), Octavia looked over at Lincoln every few seconds, seeing if he’d moved from where he stood watching Clarke and the gates. After about 20 minutes of her pacing back and forth Raven finally snapped, “Clarke Stop, giving me a fucken headach with all your pacing.” Raven points to the small area where she’s been going back and forth, “You’ve already made a crater in the ground.”

 

Octavia looks away from Lincoln and to where Raven points, she frowns when she sees that Raven isn’t exaggerating about what Clarke’s incessant pacing has done to the ground beneath her feet. Both girls look to Clarke who stops momentarily looking down at where she’d been walking back and forth, then back up at her friends grumbling out a non-committal apology.

 

When Clarke resumes her pacing Octavia and Raven share a look full of concern for their friend, but also intrigued as to what has her so worked up. Raven gestures towards Clarke with her head before Octavia gets up and gently places a hand on Clarke’s shoulder, whispering a short “Clarke”. Clarke stops her movements to look down at the hand resting on her shoulder, her eyes are unseeing, she sees the gesture but doesn’t understand it nor registers its meaning she’s too far off, already on her way to Polis in her head, already with Lexa. Clarke glances up at the girl she now considers a little sister confusion written all over her face, Octavia’s face softens and her voice lowers further, “What’s wrong Clarke? You don’t pace for no reasons, something's got you wound up.”

 

Clarke looks over Octavias should and sees mirrored concern on Raven’s face, she sighs, she can’t tell them the truth - not yet, not about being a wolf - but she can tell them a half truth. She huffs over to where the two had been sitting, Octavia reclaiming her previous seat and Clarke taking one next to Raven so that she still has a view of the gate. “It’s Lexa.”

 

“What happened?”

 

“Nothing.”

 

Octavia and Raven share a confused and concerned glance before turning their attentions back to Clarke. When Clarke offers no further information Raven digs, “Care to elaborate Princess?”

 

“You know I don’t like it when you call me that.”

 

“And you know I don’t like it when I have to wait for answers, so spit it out.”

 

“Nothing's wrong per-say, I just haven’t heard from her for a few days and I’m a little concerned. She said she wouldn’t be gone long.”

 

“Clarke she is the leader of her people, maybe something came up. You know how it is.”

 

Clarke offered her friends a tight smile, she hated lying to them, but her imagination created some vivid images of what would happen if she told them the whole truth, that she was a werewolf and all that that entailed. She fixed her gaze back on the gate, not trusting herself not to give away her true emotions if she looked at either of them, “Maybe” she mumbled.

 

Before Octavia or Raven got a chance to press further Clarke saw Lincoln move from his spot of observation and head towards the gate, Clarke shot up from her seat and followed the tall arboreous man like a hound with a scent, her two friend clambering after her.

 

“Open the gate.” Lincoln's clear authoritative voice boomed up to the guards at the gate, they spring into action before looking at him and halting all movement. Clarke let’s out a frustrated growl.

 

“Oh for fuck's sake.” She murmurs, then louder she says, “Listen to him and open the gate.”

 

The two younger Arkers recognize her and the authority lacing her tone (she may have also added a little bit of Alpha influence to hurry along the process). As the boys, who Clarke didn’t care to get the names of, finished opening the gates the rider cleared the treeline, appearing into view and cascading towards them at a furious pace on his horse.

 

Hearing the commotion people had gathered just inside the gate while Clarke, Lincoln, Raven Octavia all waited outside. They were joined swiftly by Bellamy and Marcus, arriving as the messenger continued to them on foot.

 

“I need to speak to the leaders of Skaikru, I have an urgent message from Heda.”

 

//

 

Clarke, Bellamy and the heads of each specialist division (Abby, Kane, Pike, Sinclair and Raven)  meet in the old cafeteria area. Lincoln and the messenger from Polis spoke amongst themselves after having delivered the news of Lexa’s official offer to Skaikru. Clarke and Lincoln sheared several looks, all she wanted to do was go, she just wanted to be with Lexa, to accept the offer, but they had to agree and the people had to vote. Lincoln could see that Clarke was getting agitated and restless, her control over her wolf and her abilities with her lack of concentration and he was becoming concerned. He left the side of the messenger to speak to the group of people crowded around strategizing and weighing the benefits a union like this would provide, though they’d already discussed it at length many times, that was before the new system of government was implemented. “Heda expects you to send your leaders and a chosen Ambassador to Polis for the unification ceremony. I suggests we leave within the hour to get there before night fall.” Lincoln spoke up trying to move things along.

 

Kane was the first to speak up, “We can’t accept the Commanders offer, not without putting it to a vote of the people first.”

 

“Kane we’re running out of time to accept the offer, we have to move now.” Clarke all but whines.

 

“Clarke it was you who suggested this way of government, we have to respect what we offered to our people,” Bellamy says calmly trying to defuse the situation.

 

“Then let’s hold a vote right now, let’s go outside and ask if this is what our people want. We all know that without this, without becoming apart if Lexa’s Coalition, we won’t survive for long on the ground. They can offer us trade, knowledge and resources. And we’ll never have to worry if one of the Clans plans on attacking us or not, because they would be going against everyone if they did. This is our best shot at not only surviving, but living.”

 

They all nod, they know that Clarke is right, they know that without this they’re stuck, doomed to fail. When no one says anything Clarke just nods, more to herself than any of them. “Good, then let’s go hold a vote.”

 

She makes off towards the common area outside of the Ark to the platform she stood on when she announced Abby’s punishment; however, this time she’s not up there alone. Bellamy and all the specialists - including her mother - are up there with her, backing her play. They will make this decision together as one people.

 

When it looks as though everyone was in the square Clarke clears her throat, a hush feel over the crowded almost instantly. “People of Arkadia we’ve been offered a deal by the Commander of the 12 Clans. She has offered to accept us and add as as the 13th Clan in the Coalition, for us to become apart of her people and be granted all the benefits that provides. We will be safe, have access to knowledge and resources that they can provided, we can share with them our knowledge as well and help better one another.” Clarke pauses allowing her people to digest the information she was giving them, “We-” she gestures to the people behind her, the people with the knowledge to lead their people, “-think this is a good idea, and a very generous offer on the part of the Grounders. We think that this is the right thing to do, but it is up to you because we are here to serve you, not dictate what happens to us, not like on the Ark.” She pauses side eyeing the old members of the Council. “So we are to put it to a vote, all those in favour of accepting the Commanders offer and becoming the 13th Clan of the Coalition raise their hand now.”

 

There is a tense silence as they wait for people to vote, it seems to Clarke as if the whole world holds its breath while waiting for that first hand to go up into the air. But once it done another follows, then another and another until almost the entire population of the Ark has their hands raised. Clarke releases a shaky breath, feeling her lungs ach with the need for fresh oxygen, and the world begins to spin again. Though it is a clear landslide vote she has to allow for the other side of the argument to be heard, “All opposed.” A measly five hands are raised before swiftly being snached down from the air as if it burnt and scolded them, they clutched their wrists as though it would alleviate the pain on an unknown force. Clarke releases her breath before speaking, “Then it’s settled, we will join the Coalition and become the 13th Clan.”

 

Clarke looks out to her people and can’t help but feel as though things are finally beginning to work out and go their way. She thinks they will soon find peace and no longer have to only survive.

 

//

 

Clarke could hear her heart pounding in her ears, her blood rushing throughout her limbs as she ran through the wood, focused only on one thing, following Lexa’s scent. Lincoln ran beside her, but she payed little to no mind to him, following his slight nudges in the right direction when she could no longer pick up Lexa’s weak scent. As soon as her people had agreed to the merge Clarke had practically turned and began running in the direction she’d last seen Lexa go off in, she couldn’t wait, her body was vibrating with excitement and abuzz with energy.

 

She had announced that herself, Bellamy and Kane would be going to represent Skaikru at the ceremony, and that she would be the Ambassador for their ‘clan’ and as such would spend a great deal of time in Polis but would also return to relay information and when needed. Her people seemed a bit reluctant to let her go, as they looked up to her for guidance but they understood that she had the best connection with the Grounders and as such would be the best to serve in a position directly relating to working with them - most also knew that her and Lexa had some kind of relationship and this would have been a contributing factor in her decision to be the Ambassador for their people.

 

_*Clarke and Lincoln having already known what was coming were prepared and ready to set off as soon as the rider had arrived, Clarke even offered information about why the rider was there, but she offered it far too quickly in her eagerness to set off for someone who had just been told and this arose suspicion amongst Raven and Octavia, the two friends looking between one another to see if the other had picked up on the subtlety of it. When Clarke made her way over to Lincoln to tell him to ‘ready their horses’ they ambushed her, “Ok spill Princess.”_

 

_Clarke blinked at Raven and Octavia, genuinely confused as to what they were on about. “What?”_

 

_“You heard me, out with it. How did you know why that rider was here and what he had to say before he’d even had a chance to say it?”_

 

_Clarke had thought she’d been stubble in the extent of her knowledge regarding what was going on, apparently not. She shot a nervous glance over to where the others still stood, her gaze falling predominantly on her mother, Kane and Bellamy._

 

_Octavia reached out a hand to rest on Clarke’s forearm, “Relax.” she said, sending Clarke a small reassuring smile, “No one else noticed. Just us.”_

 

_Clarke looked to Raven for confirmation and when she nodded in response Clarke let out a relieved sigh._

 

_When Clarke doesn’t offer up any information Raven interjects into the silence surrounding the trio, “Clarke, you can trust us.”_

 

_The statement is so earnest and shy, something not usually seen for the tough mechanic and it makes Clarke realise that her friends are worried and confused and just want to help her, but she doesn’t know how to tell them, she doesn’t know what to say. So she does what she always does when she thinks her people can’t handle the truth, she lies. “He told me on the way in.” She rushes out, “Lexa told him to tell me before anyone else.”_

 

_“Cut the crap Griffin.” Raven speaks up, voice filled with anger and white hot fury, any trace of the soft shy emotions she was feeling a moment ago gone. They knew Clarke was lying and weren’t going to let it go, “We all know that’s a load of bull. Now tell us the truth.”_

 

_By this point Octavia had a firm grip on Raven’s left arm and was trying to get her to stop forcing the issue by whispering to her to stop. A defiant and challenging look took up residence in Raven’s eyes, she was not going to back down, she knew something was up, she’d known since Clarke got back and she’d left it alone until now, waiting for her friend to be ready to tell her; but she’d had enough, it was time._

 

_Clarke sighed, casting her eyes down to the ground she whispered for the pair to follow her. She didn’t check to see if they were following her, she knew they were, their curiosity wouldn’t allow them to stay put, that and Clarke could hear their feet crunching the earth beneath them, their lungs pulling in the air - the whine it made when they were full. She could also hear her own heart racing beyond what was probably healthy for a human - but she wasn’t human, not anymore._

 

_She lead them into the forest, somewhere out of the way but also somewhere it wasn’t hard for them to find their way back. When she stopped she didn’t turn around, she couldn’t bare the thought of their mortified faces when she told them, couldn’t bare their judgment. She stood rooted into the earth, wishing that it would just swallow her whole and take her away from this impossible situation._

 

_“You’re really starting to freak me out here Giffin,” Raven said trying to add some humour to the situation, but Clarke could hear the uncertainty, the waver in her voice._

 

_Clarke let out a shaky breath, “I… I’ve changed since I’ve been gone, I’m not the person I was before.”_

 

 _“Clarke, whatever it is we’ll always support you, we’ll always love you.” Octavia said, pausing before continuing “It’s you, me, and Raven against the world Clarke; we’re sisters and nothing can - nothing_ **_WILL_ ** _\- change that. You guys and Bell are my family, and family stick together no matter what.”_

 

_Clarke turned to face them, tears filling her eyes and falling down her cheeks. Raven’s own eyes were also tear-filled, Octavia’s quiet confession hit both of them hard. It was good to have a family, a group of people you could always rely on._

 

_“Ok.” Clarke closed her eyes before taking a big calming breath and calling her wolf forward. When she next opened her eyes she stood in front of her friends - her sisters - on four legs, eyes shining bright, blonde coate whipping in the light breeze ghosting through the undergrowth._

 

_Both looked at her mouths agape and eyes wide. She figured it would be a good time to turn back so that she could answer their questions, closing her eyes again Clarke shifted back, opening them to being naked crouched on the ground with the feel of the soft earth beneath her and the silk feel of moss._

 

_Clarke looked up at her friend's eyes tentative, ready for the judgment, the hate, the miss-trust, to curse her out. But it never came. They just stared at her trying to process what they’d just witnessed._

 

_They spoke up at the same time, let out a string of “Hole shit” “Oh My Gods” and various squeals of excitement. Raven was the first of the two to string together a sentence of more than a few words, “Holy fuck Giffin, you’re a fucken wolf, like an actual wolf.” her hand went to her head in disbelief, “That's…. That's..”_

 

_Octavia cut her off “Fucken amazingly awesome!”_

 

_Clarke let out a chuckle, “You think so? You’re not scared? Repulsed?”_

 

_Both girls looked at Clarke as though she’d simultaneously grown a third head and gone crazy, “Clarke why would we be? You’re still you… Just a little bit fluffier sometimes.” Octavia said softly, reassuring Clarke and calming her nerves._

 

_Raven on the other hand had recovered from her initial shock and was releasing quirks about the situation, “Now that you mention it Giffin, the fact that you’re able to turn into a beautiful golden wolf at will is incredibly awesome but also kinda terrifying, though I think I can live with that, it’s just being subjected to you naked that makes me think we can’t be friends anymore.” she paused before continuing her crusade, “It’s cruel and unusual punishment really.”_

 

_They hold eye contact for a moment before all three girls burst out into a fit of insatiable laughter that ends with raven chucking her jacket at Clarke so that she doesn’t feel so exposed, for which she is grateful._

 

_“So… I bet you guys have a lot of questions.”_

 

_Octavia merely nods, not as bother by the science of Clarke’s transformation as Raven. “I have a few but they can wait until you get back. I’ll just ask the basics for now. Lexa?”_

 

_“Yes.”_

 

_“How?”_

 

_“A dormant gene that is activated by an Alpha wolves bite or scratch. Kind of like a mutagen.”_

 

_Raven nods along fascinated. She was about to continue her questioning of Clarke’s transformation her own comment about waiting for Clarke’s return be damned when they are interrupted by Lincoln's arrival._

 

_“Clarke if you still wish to run we should leave now, while Kane and Bellamy are still getting ready for the journey.”_

 

_Clarke nods, standing she hugs her friends goodbye, “Can you… Can you tell my mum goodbye for me, I would go but-” she gestured down at her underdressed self, Raven and Octavia get the message though and nod their agreement. “Thank you.”_

 

_Clarke turns away from them when Octavia says “Run?” Clarke merely turns her head back to them a smirk on her face, she unwraps Ravens jacket from around herself and drops it to the ground closing her eyes and turning where she stood. When she opens them in front of her is a bronze coated chestnut wolf, she hears Octavia breath a “Oh my god.” and can sense the shift in her pheromones accompanied by a sheepish look on Lincoln's face, she laughs to herself, noting it to tease him about later.*_

 

Lincoln and Clarke had been running for over an hour when he brought her out of her thoughts, “Clarke we’re nearing Polis, follow me from here and don’t do anything unless I tell you.”

 

Clarke nods her acceptance and acknowledgement of what he’s said, somewhat confused about the seriousness in his tone. They slowed their pace down to a brisk slink through the underbrush of the forest. The further they moved the more Clarke senese began to overload. She could smell thousands of different scents, ranging from foods, to people, to crafts. Hear voice, music, laughter. The more she could sense the closer the got until she could finally see ancient buildings from before the bombs that towered over the forest and the wall that protected them and those inside, they revealed even the might of the mountains and their reach for the sky and stars. The closer they got to the outer gate of the city the more rubble and remnants of a time before there were, hollowed out shells and skeletons of a time long past and dead.

 

About 100 meters before the gate they stopped and went further into the forest, Lincoln lead them over to the remains of an old building. “Follow me inside, there should be clothing for us to change into. We’re not allowed in our wolf form in the city.” He said by way of explanation.

 

Clarke followed him into the ‘building’ that looked like the remainder of the roof would collapse at any given moment. As the walked deeper inside Clarke could see the extent that the ruins had been retaken by nature, could see how new life had began to blossom from the carcass of something that had long since been dead; it gave her hope for the future, and for the past. As the moved forward Clarke could see the remnants of someone's life, there were old books eaten away by nature and time, old photo frames long since degraded, broken corcory litter about the floor, and rotten and forgotten toys abandoned in darkened corners remembered only by scavengers.

 

They continued on past the memories of a life once lived and taken into a room that was still mostly intact, though bare apart from a trunk in the corner and the rusted frame of a steel bed, the walls and supports are still firmly in place. “Your cloths should be in there, I’ll leave you to get changed.”

 

“Wait, Lincoln, your people don’t have Skaikru cloths and they’ve never meet me.” Lincoln understood what Clarke was trying to imply and smiled.

 

“Heda picked out your clothing.” was all he said before leaving Clarke to descend deeper into the house.

 

Clarke went further into the room closer to the trunk, sniffing the air trying to pick up a scent. When Clarke could no longer hear Lincoln she shifted back into human form, further approaching the area that held the trunk and a faint scent of leather along with something oddly familiar - a mix of earth and pine. Clarke stopped at a trunk and opened it, the full brunt of the scent overcoming her, it was Lexa’s scent, the cloths in the trunk were covered in it, as though she’d slept in them and rubbed them on her scent glands so that people would know that they were hers - that Clarke was hers.

 

The thought sent a shiver down Clarke’s spine and a rush of heat to in between her thighs. The pure animalistic claim spoke to apart of her she didn’t fully comprehend, her wolf was ecstatic about it, Clarke on the other hand - though in love with Lexa and felt her own need to claim Lexa as hers - was reluctant to blindly embrace Lexa’s need claim her, or her own need to claim Lexa for that matter. Clarke shook off the thought for now, she’d approach the subject with Lexa later, for now she really just wanted to put some clothes on.

 

It took Clarke a lot longer to get dressed than it should have. The leathers Lexa had chosen had so many pieces to them and so many strings that needed to be tied that Clarke confused herself. Lexa had chosen a snug tight fitting pair of black leather pants, with crisscrossing strings down the outside of the right leg, there was also a a gray piece of fabric that went Clarke’s left leg from the ankle to half way up her thigh where it was secured with two looping buckles that also secured a small dagger sleith to Clarke’s outer thigh, the corresponding knife was placed along the side of the trunk. Lexa had left her a black singlet that was longer on one side and faded into a dark hue of blue the further down it got, Clarke paired that with a tan leather jacket that hugged her form nicely but still allowed her full range of motion - she was amazed at the craftsmanship and practicality of the Grounders clothing, even the leather pants we’re constricting in anyway. There were also two leather lace up wrist guards, she tried for so long to put them on herself but ended up growling in frustration and calling Lincoln in to assist her. Once those were on all that was left were her mid calf leather lace up boots, not too dissimilar to the ones she had back at Arkadia, however these ones were made for the purpose of keeping the occupants foot comfortable on long journeys and Clarke almost moaned when she stood up, it felt like walking on fine grain sand in the surf - heavenly.

 

By the time they were finished and emerged from the house the sun had sunk down close the horizon, there was maybe an hour or two of daylight left. Clarke waited for Lincoln to start walking off towards the giant wall that protected the city before she followed along at his side. They didn’t head towards the large main gate that Clarke had seen on their approach, but rather to a hidden side door that was located deeper in the forest.

 

As they approached the guards drew their weapons and Clarke heard movement in the trees as well as the sound of bow strings being drawn, she knew that there was at least three archers that had their arrows trained on them as well as the two guards in front of them with their swords drawn. Clarke remained silent and tried to keep her movements clam, she didn’t want to give these guards any reason to attack them.

 

Lincoln stopped a few paces from the men guarding the door into Polis, “Lincoln kom Trikru en Clarke kom Skaikru, Heda konge osir.” *Lincoln of the Tree People and Clarke of the Sky People. Heda has summoned us.*

 

The smaller guard on the left looks like he is concentrating for a moment - Clarke glances up at Lincoln out of the corner of her eyes, seeing if he knows what's going on, she then hears his deep voice resonating through her head, _“He is asking Heda if what I say is true.” -_  the guard's brow furrows and becomes wrinkled, his eyes growing wide, he raises his hand and shouts to those in the trees, “Chil daun! Chil daun!”

 

Clarke hears the release of tension from the bow strings and the sheathing of the archers arrows before they slip back further into the darkness the cover of the tree canopy provides. The guard on the right has also returned his sword to its sheath as the one that spoke to Lexa opens the door for them. “Our apologies, we didn’t know who you were.” The guards bow slightly when Clarke walks past and she figures that it must be because they can smell Lexa’s scent on her clothing.

 

They enter the door and are transported to a completely new world. The streets are abundant with vibrant colours, light and life. There are streams of people that seem to go on forever, weaving through buildings and around market stores, people trading one thing for another, and children running around play fighting, dancing and living. Music sails on the winds through the air bringing joy to those that can hear it and causing people to begin dancing where the stand no matter if it is in the middle of the street way. Polis is alive. The slight alone makes Clarke’s heart feel lighter, she feels a warmth and joy that she thought she’d lost after Mt. Weather. After she saw innocents - children that did nothing wrong but be born and trust the adults around them to do the right thing - die at her hand.

 

The thought is snached from Clarke’s mind when she and Lincoln are approached by a tall slender figure draped in black furs held on by chains. Her presence is imposing and radiates of power, she carries herself with an air of importance that demands attention. Her face is adorned by matching scars that radiate out in an arch around her face from her the point between her eyebrows, flowing around the arch of her face to perfectly cup her cheek bones, making them appear more jagged. Her eyes are a cold dead blue that resemble ice - cold and calculating - more than that of soft skies or calm oceans. Her entire presence sends a shiver down Clarke’s spine - and not the good kind - and raises her hair on end, she has an indescribable urge to growl at the woman and her following ontourage. Her voice does nothing to calm Clarke’s unease, it is strong and fierce, with a deathly undertone to it, the threat of danger and violence but a mere whisper on her tongue, her words are thick and don't sit right as they roll off her tongue; even 'Wanheda' sounds odd and uncertain like she is saying it properly for the first time, testing the taste of it on her lips. "The great Wanheda, we meet at last.”

 

Clarke is taken aback by the name, she knows enough Trigedasleng to decipher what it means _“Commander of Death”_ it reminds her of a quote from J.R.Oppenheimer the man who built the first atomic bomb, “I am become death, destroyer of worlds.” Seems adapt, he created something that lead to the near extinction of the human race and she eliminated an entire society, an entire population of people all with her will. She doesn’t need it but Lincoln uses the pack bond to confirm her theory of what it means and why she has the title, just another thing to add to the list of things to discuss with Lexa later.

 

Lincoln steps forward, angling himself between Clarke and the stranger snarling as he does so. Clarke also notices the guards that greeted them on this side of the wall standing protectively around her also, hands gripping their weapons some growling at the woman.

Clarke holds up her hand in a similar gesture that she’s seen Lexa do to silence her people. The act has an air of power and authority to it, it stops the guards growls and snarls almost instantly, however they still remain rigid and their hands remain on their weapons, ready to fight if necessary. Clarke wonders who this woman is to make them so uneasy, surely it can’t just be that they got the same vib from the woman that she did. Nevertheless Clarke was interested in how this would play out, she wanted to know more about the mystery woman. “Call me Clarke, and you are…?”

 

The woman gives Clarke a sly smile like she’s just uncovered her greatest weakness and plans to use it to slit her throat, though maybe that’s just her face. “Of course, where are my manners? I am Queen Nia of Azgeda.”

 

“It’s nice to meet you, Nia, what brings you to Polis?” Clarke purposefully left out Nia’s title to see how she’d respond, and she did not disappoint the faked smile turned sour and a frown dawned her lips before it could be cast aside for another more cunning smile to take its place.

 

“I suspect the same thing that brings you here Clarke of the Sky People.” Clarke hated the way her name sounded on Nia’s lips, the prominence of the ‘k’ sound sounded like a pistol being clocked when it was loaded and ready to fire, her own name sounded like a weapon ready to be used against her when said on the woman’s tongue; it was nothing like how it sounded when Lexa said it.

 

Clarke managed a tight smile, “The unification ceremony. Will you be representing your Clan?”

 

Nia looked Clarke over with her cold calculating eyes, as though she were a prey she was stalking and trying to figure out how to take down most effectively. She studied her, trying to figure out her next move so that she could be one ahead every step of the way. Trying to gauge what information she should divulge and what misdirections she should implement. “No, I had business in Polis before all of this occurred-” Lincoln scolded when she said this and she sent him a hard glare, this was something Clarke was going to have to address when they were alone later, it occurs to her that Nia and her ‘business’ may be the reason Lexa had to return to Polis in the first place. “So I thought why not stay for the party since I’ve already made the journey and why not meet the leader of the new Clan to join our Coalition.”

 

Clarke and Nia stare at one another for a long while, each trying to psyche the other out, to win a power play. Clarke could feel Nia trying to use her influence on her, but it was weak - at least in comparison to Lexa whom she’d been training to resist wolf influence with. When Clarke did not submit to her will - when she didn’t even look like she’d broken a sweat-defying it - Nia narrows her eyes, her glare boring its way through Clarke’s soul digging down to the deepest darkest pits trying to find the answers that she seeks.  

 

Lincoln clears his throat, “My Apologies, but Heda is awaiting your arrival, Clarke.”

 

Clarke nods, “Thank you, Lincoln. If you’ll excuse me, it’s best not to keep Heda waiting, it was nice meeting you Queen Nia.”

  
A sly smile overtakes the Queens hardened features, “And you Wanheda, na kom osir hit op nodotaim.” *Until we meet again.*


	10. When in Polis (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa reunite *cough, smut* ;), Clarke meets the family (well at least some of it)

The Ice Queen skulks back into the shadows from which she came, lurking, waiting for her next opportunity, she blends into the crowd and disappears from sight within seconds.  Lincoln and the guards around her all relax when the Queen’s no longer in sight, their bodies sagging from the effort of remaining tensed in her presence, Clarke lets out the breath she’d been holding.

 

“Are you ok?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Are you sure?” Lincoln didn’t say it out loud, but what he was really trying to say was *She tried to use her Alpha influence on you, and you didn't even blink.* Lincoln knew that Clarke was a powerful wolf, but they hadn’t told him how powerful - the less people that knew the better. But they way he was looking at her now made her question whether or not she should have faked compliance, not let Nia know that she could resist her will so easily … She shook off the idea Nia wasn’t using all her strength which meant she didn’t know that Clarke was a stronger Alpha than her… Yet.

 

“Yes Lincoln I’m fine,” she pauses “Both you and Lexa have some serious explaining to do.” 

 

//

 

Clarke remembers how they got to standing outside Lexa’s throne room when the sun had long since set and the moon was steadily rising higher into the sky,  _ *Clarke was torn as they made their way through the streets of Polis through back alleys and side streets, unknown to the city and it’s residents, on their way to Lexa’s illustrious home.  Clarke wanted to take in Polis, to experience the beauty, wonders and extravagance it seemed to hold on first glance, but she also wanted to be with Lexa as soon as humanly - or Wolfley - possible - especially after her run in with Nia earlier. So she and Lincoln decided it would be best if they headed to Lexa and left exploring the city until a later date, that and Lincoln was scared that if Lexa heard of what happened with Nia and couldn’t find Clarke it would be his head. Their movements were covered by the shawl of darkness, they stayed well on the outer limits of the city away from the bustling stalls and the lit up streets. They made their way as quickly and inconspicuously as possible to an old world storm drain, the steel barred cover long since taken over by overgrown weeds and vines, twisting and turning to create an intricate design and cover the gaps between each bar. Lincoln felt around the edge of the cover looking for a weak point Clarke presumed, she knew that  even with his wolf strength Lincoln wasn't going to be able to move it by himself, they were drilled in with industrial strength bolts, and Clarke doubted that even after almost a century they would just rip off, “Lincoln we’ll have more luck bending the bars, you're not going to be able-” she was cut off when Lincoln grunted and rolled the cover to the side clearing a path for the both of them to enter the tunnel.  _

 

_ She looked at him unbelieving, he returned her gaze with a small genuine smile “The Commander likes to have contingencies in place, Clarke.” _

 

_ Clarke continued to gape at him before he enter the tunnel, indicating that she was to follow. Once Clarke was inside Lincoln moved the cover back into place, shutting of the little light that had seeped into the tunnel, both of their eyes glow in the dark depths of the tunnel allowing them to see as they moved further into the void. While Clarke was able to stand up to her full height, Lincoln had to hunch over to avoid hitting his head on the low hanging roof of the tunnel. _

 

_ They made their way through various twists and turns in the tunnel system, they had been walking for what felt like hours to Clarke, she was ready to question whether or not Lincoln even knew where the way out was, she was weighing up the pro’s and con’s of reach out to Lexa and get her come and find them when they came to a door. It was a large wooden door, with an ancient rusted latch and lock on it, in the dim light provided by her wolves sight Clarke could see that there was an impression on the door but couldn’t make out what it exactly was. _

 

_ “It’s the mark of the Commander.” Lincoln states matter of factly, “Every Commander takes the mark when they ascend, it’s a symbol to show what is theirs and what is protected by them.” He says side eyeing Clarke like he knew some secret that she wasn’t yet privileged to, and to be honest it wouldn’t surprise her. _

 

_ They made their way through the door coming to a basement area that looked like a prayer room, they didn’t linger long, it felt wrong to Clarke to be there and from the look in Lincoln’s eyes they really weren’t meant to be there either. As they ascended through the building climbing to the higher levels where Lexa’s throne room and bed chambers were located it was eerily silent, there were few people around, the occasional handmaid or guard but not to the extent Lincoln had been expecting to encounter, and the thought set him on edge. His body changed from one of relaxed exhaustion to alert tension. His movements become slower - more calculated - everything he did had a purpose and a graceful flow to it, his movements that of a trained hunter - beautiful and deadly. As they approached the room at the end of the hall - which Clarke presumed was Lexa’s throne room - they noticed a distinct lack of guards, and though Clarke didn’t know Lexa to be surrounded and protected by guards she knew from her talks with Lincoln that there should be at least two posted outside any room that Heda was in.  _

 

_ The reason for the lack of guards became ever more apparent the closer they got to the sealed doors, there were strong anger and worried pheromones accompanied by a crushing Alpha will seeping out from the room. The combination and unexpectedness of the onslaught almost knocked Clarke on her ass. When she recovered from the initial shock she tried to hold her breath and inhale through her mouth as much as possible to avoid further affect from the seeping rage on the other side of the door. Lincoln motioned for her to listen, what she heard was Lexa’s voice deep and dangerous, laced with both anger and a demolishing growl.  _

 

_ It then dawned on Clarke, she’d never reached out to Lexa to tell her about Nia - or that she was fine after the ordeal and on her way to her. She looked to Lincoln to see if he had and by the look on his face she could see it dawning on him also, he shook his head from side to side in a small gesture to indicate that he hadn’t reached out either, but from her rage someone must have told her about Nia. _

 

_ Clarke gulped, she knew that sooner or later she’d have to enter the room and deal with Lexa’s anger head on, and by the smell and sound of it, it would be best if she did it sooner rather than later.* _

 

Clarke took a deep breath and turning her gaze on Lincoln saying in a hushed whisper, “Stay here, let me calm her down before you come in.” He gave her a small nod but she knew he’d follow her in any way, she sighed placing her palms flat against the large oak doors and pressing on them until they gave under her strength and flew open to reveal a fuming pacing Lexa and by the looks of it frightened subjects. 

 

At the sound of the doors opening all eyes in the room flew to Clarke, but they only ones she watched, the only ones she cared for, were the vibrant forest green ones alight with fire. Their gazes locked, deep pools of electric blue captivating and ensnaring illuminated forest green, they danced and swam with one another, seeing all the things unsaid, the worry, hurt, anger, love - everything.

 

The instant their eyes locked and she knew it was real Lexa felt her body relax, the tension in her muscles evaporate, her eyes softened and she was able to breath again. The onslaught of emotions that came with seeing Clarke again - even without the Nia incident - was indescribable, Clarke was there and she was safe - and when she looked at her Lexa felt that she’d finally come home.

 

“Clarke.” It was a breathless whisper that escaped her lips before she could stop it.

 

Clarke crossed the room, paying no mind to the sets of eyes that still tracked her every move, the hands that reached for weapons the closer she got to Lexa, and embraced her love. She pulling her tightly against her own body, using it to shield Lexa from the world, to take them away to a place where it was just them. Lexa her face into the crook of Clarke’s neck, inhaling her scent as deeply as possible reassuring herself that this was in fact real. “I’m here, I’m real, this is real.” She whispered into Lexa’s ear, mumbling all the reassurances that she knew Lexa needed to hear. “I’m safe.” Clarke moved her neck so that she could maneuver to cup Lexa’s face in her hands, shifting her lover's gaze to her own so that she could see the fierce truth in her next words, “And I am irrevocably in love with you.” 

 

Lexa’s breath hitched in her throat, emotion thick in her words, “Yu Ai houd, Ai hod yu in.” *You are my world, I love you.” 

 

Her eyes dart from Clarke’s eyes to her lips and back, Clarke’s gaze glosses over and does the same, her pupils expanding, fully blown, erasing the blue hue of her iris almost completely. Their faces inch closer and closer until their lips ghosting over one another's, barely there, just grazing, about to lock in a passionate reunion when a throat is cleared from Lexa’s right.

 

The couple's shaky sighs come out as they part and turn to look at who would dare to interrupt them. Clarke appears embarrassed having forgotten that others were in the room, whereas Lexa is just pissed that her reunion with her love was interrupted by the interjection of Titus. 

 

Her eyes are daggers, the guards in the room seem to shrink and disappear under its heavy weight as it roams the room in search of Titus. When her gaze lands on Titus Lexa’s rage spikes, he’s looking a little too smug at having stopped them from kissing. She grits her teeth and is about to lash out when she feels Clarke’s strong reassuring grip on her forearm, she looks down as Clarke’s hand snakes it’s way down to entangle itself with her own. Her eyes fly back up to Clarke’s, searching, Clarke gives her a small smile and squeezes her hand. Lexa takes a breath, closing her eyes, trying to control her rage before she lets it consume her.

 

With her eyes still closed she lets her voice ring out through the room, “Gon we.” *Leave us.* The guards sag in relief at being dismissed, rushing out the door before Lexa has the chance to change her mind and call them back in for another tongue lashing. There are four people who linger after Lexa gave her command; the lanky bald man that Lexa killed with her eyes - a human - another large bear of a man whose gaze remained on Clarke with a look of indifferent fascination, and two women - one a little older than herself and Lexa with dirty dark blonde hair that almost appeared to be a light shade of brown, with high sharp cheekbones that rival even those of Lexa, her eyes were sharp and vigilant, but also soft; the other an older woman of African American descent, face marked with a tattoo cupping her eye on one side and scars adorning her face on the other, she remain stoic her emotions never showing on her face, but she too were watching the pair closely - the last three were both wolves and looked to be warriors, all giving Clarke copious once-overs.

 

Lexa’s grasp around Clarke’s waist tightened with the looks the four were giving her, some skeptical, some curious, others… dangerous. “That means you four as well.” she said making it clear that she wanted them gone, and now. “Clarke and I have much to discuss, you will be introduced when the rest of her people’s leaders arrive.”

 

“Shi Heda.” The older woman say, moving to exit the room followed by the man bear and blonde. The bald man appears to want to linger but Lexa will have none of it tonight, “Gustus, Indra if you’d be so kind as to escort Titus to his chambers.” 

 

The older woman - Indra - and bear man - Gustus - move over to where the balled lanky man - Titus - still stood, moving to either side of him so that he knew that he didn’t have a choice. Hiz gaze fell on Clarke, hard and heated, Lexa’s answer growl was enough to make him move towards the exit of the room. He stopped before crossing the threshold however, turning between his escorts to face the couple again, “Remember my teachings Heda.” before turning to leave. 

 

The dirty blonde approached them, glancing at where Lexa’s arm was slung around Clarke’s waist and the pair's hands were intertwined, the smile that tugged at her lips hidden when she spoke, “I’ll make sure he stays there Heda.”

 

“Thank you, Anya.” 

 

Anya nodded her response, turning to leave, calling back over her shoulder before she disappeared out the door, “Goodnight Wanheda.”

 

//

 

They stood there in the empty room staring at one another, waiting the other out to see who would speak first. Anya’s Wanheda comment re-ignited a fire in Clarke at being lied to - well uninformed - by Lexa, and Lexa was seething over what happened with Nia. Though both were ecstatic to see the other and know that they’re safe, their anger at the others tergiversate was bubbling under the surface. 

 

Clarke was the first to break, “Wanheda huh?” she said stepping out of Lexa’s grasp, “Why’d you never tell me your people think I’m the Commander of Death Lexa? Seems like some pretty important information to forget to mention.” 

 

Lexa look at Clarke, her face trying to remain stoic to hide the hurt she felt at Clarke moving out of her grasp, she chose to deflect rather than answer Clarke’s question, she needed to distance herself from possible hurt by letting her anger take over, “What about Nia?” she contoured. 

 

Clarke scoffed, “I could say the same babe.”

 

“What do you mean?” Lexa asked confusion lacing her words.

 

“The reason you came back here, Nia’s making a move.”

 

“How do you know that?”

 

“Lincoln.” Clarke thought back to their talk as they walked through the tunnels on their way here. * _ as they walked Clarke questioned Lincoln about Nia’s purpose in Polis. “Lincoln why did you scoff when Nia said she had ‘business’ in Polis?”  _

 

_ He turned to look at Clarke in the low light, evaluating whether or not he should tell her, “If Heda wanted you to know she’d have told you.”  _

 

_ “That’s not good enough Lincoln, she all but threatened me and my people, I need to know why she's here.”  _

 

_ He stopped, turning to face her, she could see the conflict flashing over his features before it landed on a resigned look, “Very well.” They continued walking through the expanse of tunnels while he explained Nia’s presence in Polis, “You know what the Coalition stand for-” _

 

_ “An alignment of all the Clans so that they live in peace and commence trade between each other without conflict, it is controlled by Ambassadors from each Clan and Lexa.”  _

 

_ “That’s the gist of it yes, Nia wants to rule everything, she wants the power of Heda. Lexa came back because Nia mobilized her army into Trikru territory and towards the borders of Polis, whilst still abiding by the rules set out in the Coalition.” _

 

_ “So as not to declare war.” _

 

_ “Yes, Lexa can’t do anything until she breaks the Coalition law - even though everyone knows what she is planning - if Lexa moved against her without hard proof the Ambassadors would have no choice but to charge _ **_her_ ** _ with treason, of which the punishment is death.”  _

 

_ “So Lexa can’t do anything until it’s too late?”  _

 

_ Lincoln gave her a weary smile, “It would appear that way, but Lexa is smart, I know she has a plan to deal with Nia, the Ambassadors aren’t ignorant either, and they don’t want a war. If it comes to it most will follow her.” _

 

_ “Most?” _

 

_ “Nia is ruthless, she has dirt on Ambassadors or threatens them and their people - never to be proven of course - and makes them abide by her rule, if she attacks Lexa or calls for a vote of no confidence then she’ll have at least some backing.” _

 

_ “But you said that every Clan hates her, surely if they all went against her they’d win.”  _

 

_ “You would think. But none want to risk it - to risk their people - I’m sure, you of all people, understand that.” _

 

_ “I do.”* _

 

Lexa growled, “I’m going to kill him!”

 

“Keep it in your pants Commander, he only did what I asked.”

 

“You mean you asked him to betray my confidence?” Lexa’s voice was a few octaves lower than usual, a dangerous glint in it, her stance had changed also - like she was stalking her prey.

 

Clarke swallowed a lump in her throat and clenched her hands into fists willing her body to get itself under control before Lexa could smell the change in her pheromones, she was oddly turned on by the predatory look Lexa was giving her, and the dominance and power she was exerting, but they needed to have this conversation, and they needed to have it now.

 

“Like how you betrayed mine? Yes.” Clarke screamed, her anger filling her voice. She sighed before continuing,  “Nia all but threatened me and my people, I needed to know why she was here, and I suspected it had something to do with why you came back without me.”

 

Lexa didn’t hold back she did growl then, her temper flying -  **_how dare Nia threaten what was hers._ ** Lexa’s voice was small when she spoke, she was trying to keep herself under control, to control her wolf that wanted nothing more than to claim Clarke and make sure everyone knew that she was hers. “I never meant to betray you Clarke -”

 

“Oh? Then why didn’t you tell me about Wanheda? About Nia?”

 

“I wanted to protect you, Clarke.” Lexa whined, her desperation showing through, “I can’t lose you.”

 

Clarke softened at that, moving closer to Lexa till she stood right in front of her, but she didn’t dare touch her for fear of losing all resolve. “I’m right here.” Clarke voice was strained with emotions she couldn’t express all at once “I’ve always been right here in front of you.” Clarke reaches for Lexa’s hand and places it over her heart, “You could never lose me by telling the truth, it is lies and deceit that keep us apart.”

 

Lexa’s eyes were so wide and full with emotion, ashine with unshed tears, “I didn’t want you to have to remember.” She gasps out, defeated and small.

 

“Remember?”

 

“The mountain.” Clarke stiffened at the mention of Mt. Weather. “That is what my people call you Wanhead; you are the mountain slayer, the destroyer of our greatest enemy - the Commander of death. I didn’t want you to be reminded of something you wished to forget. I didn’t want you to have to listen to the celebration and pride my people but in the title when all it brings you is pain.” her voice is the smallest Clarke’s ever heard it before when she continues, it is below that of a whisper, almost indistinguishable, “I was going to tell you when I brought you here, to prepare you, but I wanted to protect you from it for as long as possible.”

 

Clarke couldn’t deny that Lexa’s reasoning was admirable, but in the end, her keeping her in the dark ended up causing her more trouble and pain. She sighed, “And Nia?”

 

“I didn’t know for certain that she was a threat, I didn’t want to worry you.” she paused, debating whether to continue or leave it at that when Clarke interrupted her. 

 

“No more secrets Lex, not even for my own good.” 

 

Lexa nodded, “And if the threat were real I wanted to keep you out of it. A conflict with Nia would mean war… I couldn’t risk it.” - _ I couldn’t risk you _ -

 

Clarke could see where Lexa was going with this, after Mt. Weather she’d been broken with the blood that coated her hands and the death that marked her soul, Lexa wanted to spear her another war, more blood and death that would tarnish and darken her even more. “I would never be out of it Lexa, Skaikru would always have to chose a side.” she paused moving her face closer to Lexa’s “Besides, I would never let you face her alone.”

 

Lexa’s gaze became hooded, her eyes darkening the closer Clarke got to her, her ability to shut her wolf out and what she wanted dwindling the closer they got. When there lips were a hair's breath apart Clarke whispered “I couldn’t risk it either - I couldn’t risk you.”

 

Lexa surged forward, not waiting for a further invitation, letting all her emotions pour into that kiss. Her anger, concern, love, lust everything she felt for Clarke in that moment was expressed through the movement of their lips.

 

Clarke moaned at the urgency and power that came through the kiss, her groans of approval spurring Lexa on, she became more bold,  her hands roaming Clarke’s body. She pushed the jacket down Clarke’s shoulders and arms, throwing it off into the corner, when her hands traveled back up Clarke’s bear arms she could feel the rising of the goose bumps she was leaving in her wake. Clarke followed suit, her hands moving from Lexa’s face to her hair, down to her waist and back up again. She tugged down on the hem of Lexa’s shirt asking silent permission to be rid of the garment that was all but a barrier between them now. Lexa moaned her approval as Clarke began to tug the shirt upwards, Lexa bit down on her bottom lip, causing her to let out a harsh exhale of air that turned into a deep throaty moan, before darting her tongue over it to soothe the area she’d bitten. Clarke had ceased her progress of removing Lexa’s shirt because of the shock of her biting her lip, the shirt remained grip in her fist, balled up against Lexa’s toned stomach. 

 

Lexa’s own hands released Clarke’s body, moving down the grip the hem of her shirt and pull it over her head, before she surged forward once more and locked her lips on Clarke’s pulse point. Sucking and biting before soothing with her tongue. Clarke whimpered and groaned beneath her, her sounds turning Lexa on immensely and making her more wild. Lexa moved from her pulse point up her neck to just behind her ear, whispering, “Have I told you how sexy you are wearing my leathers?”

 

Clarke moaned the comment turning her on even more than what Lexa was already doing, “Ahh what can I say? My girlfriend has good taste.” Clarke smirked slightly, “She is dating me after all.”

 

Lexa let out a small breathy laugh, “If she had any sense at all you’d already be out of these clothes.”

 

‘That can be arranged.”

 

Clarke detached herself from Lexa’s eager lips, drawing a deep-chested growl and high pitched whine from the other girl, Clarke let a small chuckle escape her lips, “Someone’s eager.” 

 

Lexa’s eyes were blown wide, “For you, always.”

 

Clarke’s heart clenched, though in this moment they were both driven by desire and lust there was still love in their actions. Clarke took a step back from Lexa, causing her to take one forward not wanting there to be any distance between them, “Trust me.” was all Clarke said before taking another step back, when Lexa didn’t chase her movements she gave herself a small nod before continuing with her plan.

 

Her gaze meet with Lexa’s, a slurry smile pulling at her lips, eyes alight with mischief, mirth and want. Her hands roamed down her body, Lexa’s eyes followed their movement, they cupped her curves in all the right places and ways, before stopping at the hem of her tank top. Lexa was having to hold herself back, exert control to stop herself from just going and ripping the clothes from Clarke’s body, Clarke could see this and slowed her movements, teasing Lexa.

 

She stripped off her shirt and wrist guards much faster and with more ease than she had putting them on. She stood before her girlfriend in her bra and pants, mimicking Lexa’s state of undress. Lexa was itching to touch Clarke, to feel her skin underneath her fingertips, she took a tentative step forward and Clarke stopped. “If you come closer I’ll stop.” Clarke warned voice thick and husky, she was as turned on as Lexa was. When Lexa didn’t move Clarke took that as acceptance of her rules and continued her slow tease undressing. Her hands moved to the string that kept her pants tightly curved to her hips, with it untied the front of her panties peeked through, Lexa was so turned on by Clarke’s slow tease she was only holding herself back by a thread, and once Clarke pushed her pants down that thread was gone.

 

Lexa surged forward lifting Clarke up off the ground, Clarke wrapped her legs around Lexa waist and moaned as their lips met in a fierce fevered kiss. Lexa’s hands were on Clarke’s back and were unclasping her bra as she continued forward until Clarke’s back hit the wall. Clarke let out a deep growl, hands palming in Lexa’s hair more viciously and with renewed purpose. Lexa’s hands moved down to support Clarke’s thighs, hands palming her ass cheeks, chest pushing into Clarke’s so that her back would be resting completely against the wall so that she was secure as she detangled her bra from her arms and tossed it to the side. 

 

Lexa’s mouth kissed a trail along Clarke’s jaw down to her pulse point, sucking and biting then soothing as she went. She moved across Clarke’s collarbone, left to right, moving lower down to her breasts. She toyed with Clarke kissing the skin of her breasts, but never moving to her erect sensitive nipples, one hand flew up to palm the other breast - again leaving her nipple devoid of attention. 

 

Clarke couldn’t take it anymore, her voice was becoming hoarse from her moans of pleasure, but she needed more, “Ahh, Lexa please, I need - ah! - I need more!”

 

Lexa’s mouth gave up its teasing assault of Clarke’s breasts, instead moving swiftly to her nipple, latching on she gave a small gentle suck to test Clarke’s sensitivity when she let out a cried moan Lexa sucked a little harder, rolling Clarke’s other nipple between her index finger and thumb, giving it a small tug every now and then. She grazed the sensitive flesh with her teeth as she released Clarke’s nipple with a pop, giving Clarke a moment of reprieve before continuing her assault on the other nipple, switching her mouths and hands positions.

 

Clarke’s moans and cries of pleasure only increased, her core grinding against Lexa’s stomach, looking for some kind of friction and release. Her breathing became more erratic and uneven the closer she came to climax, “Lexa, I need ahhh please.” Clarke’s voice was a husked needy whine, her hips moving with increased vigor against Lexa’s core trying and failing to find her release. 

 

Lexa released her nipple moving back up to kiss Clarke, as their lips meet her hand sank beneath Clarke’s underwear and she plunged two fingers into Clarke’s hot slick core. The moan that erupted from Clarke was nearly enough to make Lexa combust. “Fuck Clarke, you’re so wet, ahh. Fuck, you’re so hot.” 

 

Clarke whimpered leaning her head back against the wall, her hips moving trying to get some friction against Lexa’s immobile fingers. When she didn’t get what she wanted she leant forward lips brushing against Lexa’s ear, “I need you to fuck me, Lexa. I want you and I need you to take me.”

 

Lexa shivered at Clarke’s words and felt a new gush of wetness and heat between her thighs. She began moving her hand slowly at first, letting Clarke become accustom to the movement inside of her. Soon Lexa’s movements became faster and her thrusts harder, Clarke was meeting her hand thrust for thrust, her moans filling the room, “More I need more.” She moan Lexa increased the rate of her thrusts but Clarke shook her head, “No, add another-ah- another…” Lexa knew what Clarke was trying to say a slid a third finger into her when she thrust into her once more, Clarke's reciprocating groan had Lexa’s head spinning. She could Clarke was close so she swiped her thumb over her clit in one swift motion, the responding shutter the shot through Clarke’s body told her it was the right thing to do. She swiped over her clit a couple more times, each time adding more and more pressure, Clarke was so close. She kept thrusting into her and swiping her clit despite the uncomfortable angle it put her wrist in as she leant forward, her lips now against Clarke’s ear brushing up against it and sending hot breath on her already overly flush skin, she hummed in a deep hoarse voice “Cum for me Clarke.” Clarke’s breath hitched, her body tensed, her hips stopped their rocking movement and only the echo of her moans and screams remained in the room as she began to climax. 

 

Lexa’s name was the only thing to fall from her lips as her body shuttered and buckled against Lexa as her climax rocked her body, Lexa moved her hand slowly in and out of Clarke bringing her down gently from her powerful orgasm, only stopping when Clarke rested her head in the crook of her neck. A final shutter ranked Clarke’s body as Lexa withdrew her hand placing it under Clarke’s thigh mimicking her other hand holding Clarke up against the wall.

 

Clarke’s breathing was still fast and erratic when she spoke, “That was amazing.”

 

“I’ve missed you.”

 

Clarke snorted, “Yeah I got that.” Her eyes turned soft and earnest, her right hand coming up to cup the side of Lexa’s face, “I missed you too love.” she said before pulling Lexa into a soft, unrushed kiss before pulling back to look at her beautiful kiss-swollen lips and lust blown eyes, “I love you.”

 

“I love you more.”

 

//

 

Clarke’s head was buried between Lexa’s thighs, her mouth licking and lapping at Lexa’s dripping cunt, tongue exploring her folds, sucking lightly then harder on Lexa’s clit when she extracts a series of moans the more pressure she applied. Lexa’s hands were tangled in blonde curls, fingers curling and releasing messing the locks up more than they already were, noting them together and in her hands; her ass was resting on the edge of her throne, legs as wide open for Clarke as she could manage. 

 

Clarke had worked Lexa up to near orgasm several times before stopping and letting her come down just enough to keep her on edge. Lexa’s back had gone lip and she was slouched in her throne, body completely at Clarke’s mercy.

 

Her moans filled the otherwise silent room, her pleas for release, her whimpers when Clarke denied her. Finally Clarke took pity on her, she began sucking fiercely at Lexa’s sensitive nub as two of her fingers entered Lexa’s hot pulsing cunt, working their way in and out at a steady pace, curling in just the right way to hit the right spot every time Clarke pulsed them in Lexa. 

 

She was climbing, closer and closer to her climax; she could feel it building in her stomach and the base of her spine, “Ahh. Jok Clarke!” *Fuck* she threw her head back against her throne as far as she could, “I’m… I’m going to cum!.” she could feel herself clenching around Clarke’s skilled fingers and feel the coil in her spine winding up until it broke.

 

Clarke hummed while she sucked at Lexa’s clit showing her appreciation of the juices that gushed out of her girlfriend the closer she got to climax and her acknowledgement that she was going to cum, coaxing her over the edge, the sensation on her sensitive bud sent Lexa crashing over the edge. Her body tensed as she moaned uninhibitedly screaming out Clarke’s name along with a string of profanities as she reached and came down from her high, Clarke working her down from her high.

 

//

 

They had somehow made their way back to Lexa’s room uninterrupted and unseen after their reunion and multiple orgasms in the throne room. They were sprawled out on Lexa’s bed, both recovering from their latest tryst of the night, Lexa lay on her front, breathing heavily as she tried to regain her breath, Clarke lay on her side watching Lexa. Her eyes roamed the girl hungrily despite having just ravished one another repeatedly.

 

Her eyes wondered over tanned flesh and taught toned muscles, her eyes traced the tattoo that ran down the base of her spine, her hand flying out to do the same without her consent. Her movements her light and hesitant at first but when Lexa let out a small moan of appreciation her strokes became a bit bolder, however, her touch remained tight and graceful. 

 

After tracing the tattoo from beginning to finish and back a few times Clarke’s eyes wondered Lexa’s body once more. Her breathing had slowed and evened out to the point where Clarke thought she may have fallen asleep, but she knew better when Lexa let out a content sigh when she placed her lips over a tiny scar on her hip bone.

 

Clarke’s lips began trailing all over Lexa’s back, flowing from scar to scar, big or small, kissing them all as though her mouth would heal them completely. As her lips moved over Lexa’s soft skin, leaving a trail of feather light kisses in their wake, her left hand traced the tattoo on Lexa’s right bicep causing shivers to rank of her body despite the sheen of sweat that covered them both and the heat that still radiated off of their bodies.

 

Clarke had moved her kisses up Lexa’s body, now at the nape of her neck, there were a few large curved scars here and a couple smaller ones around them. It wasn’t until she’d kisses and traced the scars that she realised they weren't scars - well at least they weren’t random scars. They formed a pattern that her artist's touch was able to see even when her eyes couldn’t, too inhibited by the sheer beauty of the woman before her. 

 

The scar was in the shape of a sideways 8 that was slightly elongated, it had a set of breaks along the right underside of the design which had caused Clarke to think they were random separate scars. She pulled back from the mark at looked at it, truly looked at it. It was too neat to be a scar - to be done with anything other than a brander - that mean that it had to be deliberate and had to hold great meaning for Lexa. 

 

The longer Clarke stared at the design the more familiar it looked, she could have sworn that she’d seen it somewhere before, but couldn’t recall where. Her palms lay flat against Lexa’s back as she propped herself up to look at the design, she felt Lexa’s voice vibrate through them when she spoke, “It’s the mark of the Commanders.” she said, voice clogged with sleep.

 

“What?” Clarke’s voice was a little shrill, having been caught off guard by Lexa.

 

“The brand on my neck, it is the mark of the Commanders.” she explained, “Every new Commander takes the mark when they ascend. I put mine at the base of my neck because it’s directly linked to my brain… This may sound idiotic to your people but we believe in… spiritual occurrences … having the mark connected to my brain and my entire body - though my spinal cord - , I feel like it gives me a connection to the previous Commanders, allows me their guidance and wisdom.”

 

“I… I don’t think that’s idiotic Lexa… I think it’s powerful to have such a belief.” She paused gathering her thoughts, “They had a similar practice before Red Fire, they would bury their dead and mark their grave site, family and friends would visit - often taking to them, telling them what they’d missed, asking for guidance -” she paused once more, “I believe… that those people found comfort in that… and that they usually got what they needed from doing that. But you’re also a werewolf and there is so much I don’t know about and what that means spiritually. So I don’t think it’s idiotic Lex,” Clarke had shifted so that their eyes could lock, “It’s just another piece of you that I’m lucky enough to get to love.”

 

Lexa’s eyes welled with tears, she was never quite prepared for how amazing her mate was, she took so many leaps of faith because it was what Lexa believe and because she believed in Lexa Clarke followed her everywhere (even figuratively).

 

Clarke's hand cupped Lexa’s cheek, thumb stroking below her eye to catch any stray tears that tried to escape. When Lexa’s eyes had dried Clarke asked the question that had been on her mind since she realised that the scar was actually a brand, “Lex.” 

 

“Mmhhh.”

 

“The brand of the Commanders, can it be put on things?”

 

Lexa turned so that she was facing onto Clarke, “Yes, why do you ask Clarke?” 

 

Clarke was fidgeting with her hands, entangling them in one another, suddenly nervous, “Well… Ummm… When… When Lincoln was bring me in through the tunnels we came to a door that lead into the lower levels of the building. On the door there’d been a carved design, at the time I’d thought it might have just been wear and tear, or scratches… but after seeing and tracing the brand I know it was the same.” Though Lincoln had already told her about the Commanders mark she wanted to hear it from Lexa.

 

Lexa nodded, “Yes, Commanders use the brand to show safe passage to those that follow us and death to those that do not. We also use it in part to show what and  _ who  _ is ours.” Lexa lightly growled the last part, adding emphasis to the words; she also gave Clarke the same long eyed look Lincoln had, like she wasn’t yet privy to a secret that everyone else seemed to know.

 

A shiver ran up Clarke’s spine at the implications of the growl and Lexa’s words, and the small claim they represented - it turned her on immensely. Her pupils dilated the longer she took in Lexa’s form, a low growl of her own bubbling in her throat. Clarke flipped Lexa over so that she was now laying on her back, her look of hunger reflected back on Lexas face. She continued her feather light kisses from before, tracing Lexa’s scares, Lexa’s muscles tensed and spasmed underneath her soft plump lips and hot breath - it was the only indication of her arousal until she began to whimper and moan - her hands moved to Clarke’s hair, urging her to where she needed her most in that moment.

 

Clarke’s movements stopped, she sat up causing Lexa’s hands to slide down her body to rest on her hips. She grabbed Lexa’s hands, holding them in her own, she placed them above Lexa’s head; pushing them down to get her point across that they needed to stay there, “If you move your hands I stop and we start all over again.”

 

Lexa gulped and gave a small nod. A smirk crept it’s way across Clarke’s features, “Good girl.” The term of endearment and deep husk in Clarke’s voice seemed to turn Lexa on even more than she was as she involuntarily bucked her hips up to try and gain some friction against Clarke. The thought that Clarke could turn controlled, stern Heda into a needy whimpering mess turned her on so much more than the sight below her already had, it turned her on that her mate loved and trusted her to the extent that she didn’t need to always remain in control, that she could let the Heda mask slip and just be Lexa with her.

 

Clarke smiled into the kisses she left trailed down Lexa’s body, feeling muscles quiver beneath her lips, Lexa’s shallow sharp intakes of breath, and the shaking of her body in an effort to both restrain herself and her impending orgasm. 

 

When Clarke finally reached her hot center she inhaled, taking in her lover's scent, she loved the way Lexa smell, especially when she was aroused. Clarke planted a few light kisses on her mound before murmuring “I love you.” sending hot air against Lexa’s clit and sending slight vibrations through her core. Lexa was about to respond when Clarke lunged into her center sending her into a fit of spasms and moaned screams, Clarke’s name on her lips as she came.

 

//

 

They were awoken the next morning to a knocking at the door, Lexa growled, she’d specified with her guards that she was not to be disturbed, she was going to kill whoever allowed this intrusion. She moved swiftly and silently to the door, throwing on a singlet and sleeping shorts as she went, trying to silence the noise before it awoke her angelic blonde from her slumber.

 

When she reached the door she turned back to make sure whoever it was hadn’t awoken Clarke, the blonde merely rolled over to where Lexa had just been, sprawled on her naked front she burrowed deeper into Lexa’s pillow, inhaling deeply and exhaling in a content sigh when her lungs filled with her lover's scent. The sight caused Lexa’s heart to swell with love and longing, she wanted nothing more than to go back to bed and cuddle with Clarke. But then the reason for her rude awakening became apparent again as another loud knock sounded on the door right next to Lexa’s head. She let out a low growl, whipping the door open she stepped through and closed it quickly so that the death of whoever it was would not awaken Clarke, nor would they be able to see her naked behind sprawled across their bed.

 

Lexa’s face - the epitome of a fierce leader that could bring about the death of a thousand men with one look, the Commander of the 12 Clans, and one of the strongest Alpha’s of their time - softened into that of the young 20 year old in love girl that she was as soon as she saw who was at her door.  

 

There stood two very frightened guards, shaking with their impending punishment for not fulfilling their orders and the mammoth of a man that she knew as her brother. 

 

Before she could speak up her guards were stammering their apologies for the intrusion with assurances that they tried their best to turn him away, but well it was Gustus. “I...I….” the older guard cleared his throat indicating that the younger one should let him speak, he was a man she’d known for many years and had come to respect in their time together, “We’re sorry for the intrusion Heda, but he-” he gave a side glance to Gustus as if she’d forgotten that her were there, “-wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

 

She waved off his apology, “It’s fine Alshi, we both know that he isn’t easily denied.” she said trying to maintain the neutral expression on her face while he allowed his to slip into a shit-eating grin. “You two may leave us and return to your post down the all.” 

 

“Shi Heda,” Alshi said, the younger guard simply nodding his head before practically evaporating.

 

After the guards had rounded the corner Gustus scooped Lexa up in a bone crushing bear hug - or wolf hug in this case. “It’s good to see you, Lexi.” 

 

Lexa huffed out a sigh of annoyance before laughing as she tried to return his hug, she’d never liked Gustus pet name for her, “You saw me not 12 hours ago.”

 

“No, I saw Heda, not Lexa… Though with the arrival of Wanheda I saw a little piece of Lexa shining through.” 

 

Lexa untangled herself from her brother grip mumbling something incoherent as she went. “What was that baby sis?”

 

“Her name is Clarke, not Wanheda.”

 

Gustus looked at Lexa hard then, he could see the fierce protectiveness in her eyes when she spoke about Clarke, could see just the tip of the emotion she had for the girl. He nodded, he could tell she didn’t want to talk about it, and for now, he would respect that. “New guard?” 

 

Lexa sighed, relieved she wouldn't have to tell him about Clarke just yet. “Yes, Alshi asked to train his nephew in the post, though I think you just scared the wits out of him.” 

  
Gustus’s smile merely brightened with her comment, “Ah, but dear sister I think it is you who scared him to death.” 

 

“That’s not what I said.”

 

“Ah yes well it is what happened.” 

 

Lexa gave out a frustrated growl, whenever it was just the two of them and they didn’t have to hide their relationship it was like they were children again, Gustus with his carefree smile, beaming at a thousand bolts teasing his little sister incessantly.

 

Gustus booming laugh filled the hallway, “Lighten up Lexi, he’ll get over it.”

 

Lexa merely rolled her eyes, “Was there a reason you disturb my sleep?”  

 

“Ah yes right, straight to business.” He motioned to the door Lexa was standing in front of, when Lexa didn’t move he spoke up, “May I come in?”

 

Lexa couldn’t let her brother in, Clarke was asleep naked in her bed, but how could she decline without having to share that fact? It wasn’t as if she were speaking to any of her guards where it would simply be shrugged off as Heda not wanting someone else in her space, not wanting the presence or the scent of other Alpha’s or others, in general, invading her domain - no, this was her brother who wouldn’t accept any of those reasons, he would press until she gave him a tangible explanation for not wanting him to come inside.

 

As Lexa is in the process of freaking out over how to steer her brother away from her room the door behind her opens softly and a pair of arms are wrapped around her middle. Her body relax instantly, melting and molding into the form behind her. She let Clarke’s scent and pheromones wash over her. She noted that there was a strong presence of calming pheromones, had Clarke come out because she’d sensed her distress? Lexa didn’t really care for the reason she came out, she was just content to be in Clarke’s arms. This is, until her brother cleared his throat with an impossibly large smile on his face - it really shouldn’t be possible to move your lips into that wide of a smile. 

 

He motioned to Clarke, “Guess I know why you didn’t want me to come in now.”

 

Clarke gave a little laugh, the sound sent Lexa’s heart soaring, she lived for that sound… among others that Clarke and only Clarke made.

 

Clarke half untangled herself from Lexa, moving to stand beside her rather than behind her, draping one arm around her middle, still keeping a tight hold on her, “I’m Clarke.” She said offering up her right hand in way of greeting, Gustus took it and pulled her to him, engulfing her into an equally abrasive and consumption hug that he’d had Lexa in before.

 

When he released her he said, “Gustus, nice to officially meet you Clarke of the Sky People.” 

 

When Clarke was back at her side Lexa stood in front of her slightly, though she knew Gustus would never hurt Clarke or try to take her her Alpha needed for his wolf - a Beta - to see her claim on Clarke. She also made it so Clarke’s scent was detectable within her own - to the extent that if you caught Lexa’s scent you would also catch Clarke’s and there would be no mistaken that the two were bonded.

 

Gustus’s eyes widened slightly when he picked up Lexa’s scent - as did Clarke’s, her's also growing incredibly darker with arousal at smelling her scent intertwined with Lexa’s. 

 

“Your wolves a little overprotective don’t you think Lexi?” 

 

“Lexi?” Clarke said, surprise lacing her voice. 

 

Lexa sighed, this was inevitable, “Clarke, Gustus is my brother. Not many people know because our relationship would put him in danger if my enemies-” they shared a look both thinking of one name  _ Nia _ “- knew I cared for him they’d use him as leverage against me.” 

 

Clarke looked at Lexa, laughter filling her eyes despite the seriousness of Lexa’s previous comment, “Babe I know. I just can’t believe you let him call you ‘Lexi’.” 

 

Both Lexa and Gustus’s gazes snap to her in complete focus then, “What? How?”

 

Clarke rolls her eyes as if it were obvious, “Well first we’re bonded genius, and second I’m an artist remember? You two have very similar facial symmetry, something that only usually happens when you’re closely related to someone; in this case siblings.” her eyes grew softer, more gentle and loving when she spoke again, “And you treat him differently - not noticeable to anyone who doesn't know  _ you _ \- but noticeable to me, someone who's seen all of you.”

 

Lexa captures Clarke’s lips in a searing kiss before releasing her, leaving her dazed. She turns back to Gustus, “I guess you can come in now.” she moves inside her room pulling Clarke along with her smiling now that everything was out in the open.

 

//

 

Lexa and Clarke waited in the throne room for the arrival of her people, both standing atop of the altar, elevated from the entryway of the room. The door swung open revealing three men, the messenger - Hikata - leading Marcus and Bellamy, who were following closely behind leading them into the room. Hikata bows before both Lexa and Clarke before taking his leave having completed his mission, closing the doors to the room as he went. Clarke moves to greet the men, hugging both Bellamy and Kane, asking briefly about their journey, Lexa nods a brief greeting to the pair. 

 

“I’m afraid pleasantries are going to have to wait,” she states quietly, yet the authority in her voice is lost on no one; they all turn their attentions to her, waiting for her to continue with why they were here. “The ceremony to make Skaikru the thirteenth clan and a part of the Coalition will commence tonight, we must go over what it is you must do.” 

 

Again they all wait in silence for Lexa to continue, knowing that this must be done and she was the only one that knew what had to be done in order for their integration into the Coalition to be accepted by the other clans. 

 

“First who will be the Ambassador for Skaikru?”

 

“I will,” Clarke says, authority thick in her voice as if she were challenging either Kane or Bellamy to question her, even though they’d accepted that it was the best option for their people. Lexa allowed a shadow of a smile to grace her plump lips, she hadn’t known that Clarke planned on being the Ambassador for her people - she’d hoped that she’d find a way to stay in Polis, god had she hoped, but with each of their commitments to their people she’d known it was unlikely - she was just so happy that her brilliant wolf from the sky had found a way to both serve her people and be with her. 

 

“Alright then.” Lexa’s voice was just as authoritative as before, but her eyes were soft and her emotions of surprise, gratitude and love shone through.

 

“And which one of you,” she said gesturing over to Marcus and Bellamy “will bear our mark?”

 

Marcus and Bellamy looked to be in a silent discussion, fighting each other with their eyes over who would be dubbed the Leader of their people to the other leaders of the 12 clans, “You were elected by our people, the honour should be yours.” Bellamy’s eyes welled up at such praise from Marcus - he’d come to think highly of the man and regarded him as a father figure, so such a sentiment meant the world to Bell. 

 

He nodded before looking back to Lexa, “I will.”

 

“Very well.” She paused, giving great thought to what her next words would be, “There is one other thing that the ceremony requires, before Skaikru’s initiation can begin. The power of Wanheda” her gaze falls solely on Clarke now, gauging her reaction “is believed to rival even that of the Commanders, it is believed that if you kill Wanheda her power and the ability to Command death, will be transferred to you. This means that my enemies” another pause, Clarke and Lexa shear a look of understanding “will seek to kill Wanheda and take her power as their own to challenge me, I have been perceived as weak for not doing so myself.” a small smile pulls at the corners of her lips “However, if Wanheda were to bow to me, accepting me as her Commander then I would ‘have’ the power of Wanheda without having to kill her, and she would be safe from attacks from the Clans as it would be an act of war.” 

 

Marcus and Bellamy share a look of confusion before Marcus speaks up, “Do… do you want us to find this Wanheda for you?”

 

Lexa’s smile grows slightly, “No, that won’t be necessary.”

 

Their confusion grows and this time it is Bellamy who speaks, brow knitted, frown on his lips, “Then why did you tell us that story?” 

 

Clarke answers before Lexa has a chance to, “She was telling me.”

 

“What? Why?”

 

Clarke lets out a breathy sigh, turning to the men “Because I am Wanheda, I am the Commander of death.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys here's another chapter for you, I'm going to try and get the next one out within the next week so it might be shorter than this and the previous one. I had wanted to finish this story before I started uni but alas I don't think that's going to happen as I start on the 6th of March and I have orientation next week, but I will do my best to keep semi-regular updates :) 
> 
> As always I hope you enjoy, sorry for any spelling or grammatical errors, and let me know what you think.
> 
> Guys, I need your opinions, should I make it so that it's obvious to everyone that they're mates and they call them out on it or make it so that it's difficult to realise? What are your thoughts?


	11. Becoming one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Integration ceremony, Ayna and Clarke have a heart to heart, and things start to get treacherous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys hope you enjoy this update... it might be the last one for a little while because I'm starting University tomorrow and I'm not sure how it's gonna go, I know that it's going to be a big transition process for the first month at least and I'm not too sure how much time I'm going to have to write. But fret not I will continue this story, I will write whenever I have time and I actually have a plan for how the rest of the story will play out (the main plot and ending at least ;) ) And I am so in love with this story and all of your support that I'm going to give you an amazing end. 
> 
> Anyway as always love you guys and I hope you enjoy, all comments, recommendations and critics welcome. Sorry for any spelling or grammatical errors. 
> 
> This is a painting I did based on the tapestry that I described, https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B99tFzvFvD1GUHQ3a3A4U1hGSkE/view?usp=sharing hope you guys like it, and this is the song that was sung during the ceremony https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJWFiHcbHzg (it's the same one that was sung in the TV show)
> 
> Ok, I'm done, enjoy.

The day had passed in a flash, preparations for the ceremony and the following summit consuming the majority of everyone's time. Lexa had been gone all day dealing with the other Ambassadors and other urgent business that required the attention of Heda, leaving Clarke alone to catch up with Bellamy and Marcus, asking them how they found the ride and Polis so far - none of them having explored it yet. They’d talked for a few hours deciding how’d they’d communicate between Polis and Arkadia, deciding that if there was an urgent matter they’d use the walkies, Kane giving his to Clarke to have while she’s in Polis.

 

The boys had left to get some food and sleep in before the Ceremony that evening, leaving Clarke to wonder the tower by herself. She descended from the top level that housed Lexa’s room and the throne room, moving down talking to people as she went. She knew that she was being followed but she chose to ignore it, she knew it would just be one of Lexa’s guards keeping tabs on her.

 

She ran her fingers lightly against the wall as she walked, feeling the stone crass and smooth against her fingertips. She let her mind wonder as she walked, not paying attention to her surroundings or where she was going.

 

She stopped when her fingers landed on something that was no longer rock or stone but rather a soft material. She took a step back, looking up at the material that draped down from the ceiling encasing the wall below.

 

On the tapestry was a faded scene, the foreground was dark, - blacks and degraded deep greens that casted various shadows that looked to be in the shape of rolling hills and trees reaching out to the darkened sky, there were flickers of lightened colour amongst the darkness, as if flecks of the first snow had descended onto the nighttime scene. The closer the cascading hills and soaring trees got to the skyline the lighter the colour pigment became, the ground becoming alight and alive because of the skies glow -  the background where the sky lay was alight with colour and life in the center, radiating out, growing darker the further from the center it got - bright yellows, whites, pinks and purples grew from the base of the rolling hills up into the top of the tapestry, the colours flying out to the left and right of the streak in the cosmos; melding and melting into the deep blues and blacks of the night sky. Sprinkles of white were scattered across the scene, stars shining bright in the sky, guiding people home and lighting their way.

 

Though the image was old and faded it was absolutely breathtaking and Clarke stared at it, remembering when all she could see was the depths of space and the light of the stars, shining against the darkness that tried to consume them.

 

She felt like that sometimes, like she was a star, cast deep into the depths of space, surrounded by darkness doing her best not to be snuffed out and extinguished by the pressure around her. That feeling had lessened since Lexa entered her life, but she still felt it sometimes - like whenever she thought of Mt. Weather, and the things they’d done to survive.

 

She reached out, needed to feel the tapestry, needing to ground herself.

 

When she pressed it to the wall it wasn’t the stone flanks from before that she felt underneath, there were groves, carvings. She grasped the corner of the image and pulled it away from the wall revealing a wooden door, by the handle was the mark of the Commanders. Clarke’s eyes lit up with curiosity as she reached for the handle, tugging the door open as quietly as she could before entering.

 

The room wasn’t in darkness as she’d expected, though there were no windows to let in the midday sun's beams, there were a few already lit candles placed around the room at various heights, bathing it in a warm summers afternoon glow. The room was lined wall to wall with books, there were even books stacked up in plies on the floor next to a large plush looking chair in the corner of the room. Lexa’s scent clung to the room, soft and sweet, it made Clarke feel at ease - safe.

 

How apt Clarke thought, that a room that held the knowledge of the world and an escape into the stars would be shrouded by such a monument of the ground meeting the stars. She smiled to herself then, it was so much like herself and Lexa, the earth colliding with the stars and creating a beautiful explosion.

 

Her musing was cut short when the door opened behind her, revealing a weapon-clad figure in the arched doorway.

 

Clarke growled, moving into a more defensive stance instinctively before she could even discern who the person was - guess her lessons with both Lincoln and Lexa were paying off. When her eyes darkened and her wolf was close to the surface the mysterious figure spoke, “Calm yourself Wanheda. I mean you no harm.”

 

The way the person said _‘Wanheda’_ was distinctive, the tone and timbre different from how others said it, and Clarke realised that she’d heard it before, it was how the woman from the Throne room had said the title. _But what was her name?_ Clarke thought, _Ayla? No, no, Ann? No, that’s not it, Anya! That’s it._

 

“Forgive me, Anya, I didn’t recognise you.”

 

Ayna stepped further into the room, the soft glow of the candles illuminating her features, revealing a free unencumbered small smile pulling at her lips, “The fault is mine Clarke kom Skaikru, I shouldn’t have expected you’d remember my scent after our brief meeting.” She paused her smile transforming into more of a sly smirk, “Not when you were so clearly distracted anyway.” Her eyes glew with a hint of mirth, daring Clarke to deny what she’d implied in her statement, but Clarke just murmured some form of agreement, her cheeks heating up, a shy smile taking over her face.

 

She took pause for a moment, “You know I’m a wolf?”

 

Anya looked at her as if she were stupid, “It isn’t hard to tell, our people have been trained to know from someone's birth when the signs are almost non-existent.”

 

Clarke dwelled in her thoughts for a moment, leaving the room plagued in a silence that was neither uncomfortable nor natural. Her mind was racing, Lexa had said that her people would know that she was a wolf, but that they weren’t to know the extend of her strength, then her mind jumped to something she’d said earlier _“The power of Wanheda is believed to rival even that of the Commanders”_ was that the reason for her strength? The fact that she’d slaughtered so many? She didn’t want to think about that, not now, she shoved the thoughts to the back of her mind, willing them to stay there and not re-surface, but she knew from experience that that wouldn’t happen.

 

Anya’s next works seem hesitant as they leave her mouth, “I also know that Lexa turned you.”

 

Clarke’s eyes snapped up to hers, Lexa had never mentioned that there were any rules against turning someone, just that it was dangerous, but something about the comment and the way Ayna said it made Clarke warry.

 

Her words were cautious and uncertain, but full of truth and conviction, “Not on purpose.”

 

“Did you know what she was?”

 

“No… Well yes?”

 

Anya’s tone became chipped, “Well, which is it? Yes or no?”

 

“When I shot her I didn’t-”

 

“YOU SHOT HER?!?” Anya growled

 

“Not on purpose, well, I shot her wolf on purpose but I’d warned her and she didn’t listen. Now, will you let me finish?”

 

Anya gave her a small nod, indicating she should continue “As I was saying, when I shot her I didn’t know she was a werewolf, afterwards when I pulled the arrow out of her leg she shifted, I cared for her and she told me what she was, I’d asked her why she’d stayed in the clearing and she’d said her wolf was… drawn to me.” her eyes get a far off glaze to them, she’s back to their first meeting as she describes how she was turned, “I’d gone to say goodbye to her, and she changed, - she was in her wolf form but I could still see it - she put her Heda on I now realise,” a small sad smile dawns her lips, “she’d wanted to distance herself because she didn’t want to have any feelings that I was leaving. It frightened me - it frightened me so much to see the light just vanish from her eyes like that. I’d done the only thing I could think of, I dragged her into the freezing lake with me, hoping to shock her out of it, and that's when she scratched me; when I pulled her into the water.”

 

Anya looked at her as if she didn’t believe the words leaving her mouth, but the serenity in her eyes and voice left no question that they were in fact the truth of what had happened.

 

“I can’t believe it.”

 

Clarke’s anger laces her voice when she speaks “What? It’s the truth, I’m not lying to you, Anya.”

 

Anya seems distracted, looking at the ground trying to decipher it in her head “Huh? What? No, I know you’re not, I just can’t believe-”

 

“Believe what?”

 

“That you two are true mates.” she pauses, looking up to meet Clarke’s eyes, “Keryon ste teina.” *soul bound*

 

//

 

The Ambassadors and leaders of the 12 Clans gathered in the throne room, all awaiting the integration of Skaikru into the Coalition. Lexa stands in front of her throne, flanked by Anya, Gustus and Titus - Indra being the leader of Trikru standing with her Ambassador. She is in a elegant black floor length gown, with a leather wrapping around her center, it has a plunging v neckline at the back, showcasing all of her tattoos. She wears her war paint, but in a fashion that makes it flow from her eyes up into her hairline, there are also streaks of silver, cast in various patterns to accentuate the peaceful design. The darkness of the paint and shinning contrast of the silver makes her eyes shine, illuminated more so that anyones eyes ever have a right to be, they seem to be the bringers of life itself with their green glow.

 

The room is abuzz with anticipation when a woman begins to sing the anthem of the Coalition. The doubles doors are pulled open simultaneously revealing the goddess that is her mate, her love, Clarke.

 

Her head is held high when she walks into the room, she is proud and powerful. Her hair done in numerous intricate braids adoring her entire head. She too wore war paint, sweeping in strong sharp designs under and beside her eyes framing them and making them glow just as strongly as Lexa’s. Multiple shades of greys and silvers layered over one another making her eyes a siren call. Her hair and paint framing her face so that she looks both like an angel sent from the stars and the beautiful embrace of death.

 

She wore a beautiful flowing skirt that was left long at the back and as an upside down v in the front, showing her long toned legs as she floats down the center of the room. Her top half looking like it’s covered in dragons skin, a beautiful dark golden that flows effortlessly into black and back, it’s jagged cut lines uneven and deadly. She looks every bit the regal and powerful leader that she is, as well as the strong and fierce individual that she is.

 

Clarke reached the end of the altar, their eyes meet for a moment, everything passing between them - their love, pride, admiration, and respect for one another.

 

Clarke’s eyes never leave Lexa’s as she takes a knee, only breaking when Clarke bows her head to her Commander. She stays like this, suspended in time, showing her allegiance to her mate, showing the allegiance of Wanheda to Heda, and of Skaikru to the Coalition.

 

After a moment of pause Roan of Azgeda takes a knee, showing his and his people's allegiance to Lexa and the Coalition. Every man and woman in the room swiftly follow his head, taking a knee silently swearing their allegiance to the Coalition and to their Heda.

 

When the woman stops singing Lexa addresses the room, “Rise.” Her voice is soft when she speaks. “We welcome Clarke kom Skaikru, Legendary Wanheda Mountain Slayer.” Clarke moves from the center of the room over to where Bellamy and Marcus stand as the representatives of Skaikru. “We welcome Skaikru as we prepare to initiate them into the Coalition. To symbolize this union, the leader of Skaikru will bare our mark.”

 

Bellamy looks up at Lexa, giving her a small nod before she says motioning behind them to the fire, “Present your arm.”

 

They all turn as Bellamy rolls up his sleave, everyone is waiting in quiet anticipation. The metal smith moves swiftly placing the molten hot brand at the base of Bellamy's forearm, the sound of sizzling flesh envelops the room along with his hissed exhale of breath. After a moment that felt like an eternity to the wolves scenes it was over.

 

“Let it be known among the Twelve Clans, Skaikru is apart of our Coalition now, they have the same rights and regulations under the Coalition rule as any of you, any move against them is a move against us all.”

 

“Shi Commander of the Blood.”

 

//

 

After the ceremony is complete talks of trade, trade roots, and what is to come in the next year occur, the Summit is concluded with agreeable terms and no instructions or conflicts… and though this should be a comfort to Lexa, a sign that her people are become one rather than separate Clans, with Nia’s presence in Polis it does nothing but put her on edge; unsure of what is to come.

 

Roan stays behind as the other delegations file out of the room to go celebrate their new trade terms and to commemorate another year of peace with their people. The Ambassadors of Floukru, Trikru, and Boudalan invite Bellamy, Kane, and Clarke to join them, Bellamy and Kane accept, excited to experience the city of Polis; Clarke however, wants to stay with Lexa, she can tell that she is concerned, and she doesn’t trust the Ice Nation Prince. “You go ahead, I need to talk to Lexa.”

 

“Ok Princess, see you soon.”

 

“Bell.”

 

“I know, you don’t like being called Princess, sorry force of habit.”

 

Clarke shakes her head, “That, and just… be careful ok? It may have gone well tonight, but that doesn’t mean that they all accept us and our presence here.”

 

Bellamy looks at Clarke carefully, he knows she's keeping something back, but also knows that she’ll tell him when he needs to know. He trusts her, and he trusts her judgement. He engulfs her in a hug that rivals that of Gustus in bone crushing strength, if Clarke didn’t know any better she’d think he was a wolf. “Always Clarke.”

 

“Until we meet again.”

 

“Until we meet again.”

 

Clarke moved over to where Lexa and Roan were standing off to the side of the room near the balcony, they were talking in hushed tones despite the lack of people in the room, everyone having gone aside from a few guards, Clarke stayed far enough away so that they didn’t think she could hear what they were saying, not wanting to break up their conversation, but also wanting to know what was going on.

 

“Where’s Nia?” she heard Lexa hiss, “She was here for the beginning of the ceremony but gone before I could even announce Skaikru’s integration into the Coalition.”

 

“You know how she feels about Skaikru, about you, the Coalition… You know she’ll never bow to you, it’s something her ego will never allow.”

 

Lexa sighed, she did know all this, but with Nia going around doing god knows what she had to ask. “Do you know what she’d planning?”

 

“No.” Roan seemed to pause for a moment, thinking of his interactions with his mother since they’d both come to Polis, “I think she may suspect that I no longer support her cause… she hasn’t exactly been icing me out, but she hasn’t been sharing either.”

 

Lexa looked thoughtful, trying to come up with a solution to get Nia to trust Roan again so that he can help them defeat her before she makes her move.

 

“Then you’ll just have to give her something that she wants.”

 

Clarke's voice makes Lexa jump, she’d been so engrossed in her conversation with Roan that she hadn’t realised she’d stayed.

 

“What?” Lexa asked the same time Roan tensed and snarled at Clarke. Lexa immediately stood in front of her mate, issuing her own warning growl telling him to back down. He took a step back from the girls, beard his neck slightly to the side, offering it as a show of submission.

 

“My apologies Heda, I didn’t realise.”

 

“Realise?” It was Clarke who spoke.

 

Roan manoeuvred his head to face her, “That you two are mated.”

 

“Yes, well, I haven’t advertised the fact because of the threat Nia presents.”

 

Roan nodded, understanding Lexa’s hesitance to announce their bound to their people. He knew that it could and would be used by his mother against her. This is why Roan knew that their bond had to be kept hidden from as many people as possibly until his mother could be dispatched from this world, otherwise she’d use, then kill Clarke - not only because she is Wanheda, but also for being Lexa’s mate, and the pain it would cause her.

 

Clarke clears her throat, Lexa and Roan had been in deep thought and came out as though climbing through a haze, both having been thinking about the worst that can happen to a wolf.

 

“Do you want to hear my plan for getting Roan back in the Queen’s good graces?” She says queen with disdain in her voice, the title more mocking than anything else.

 

“You have the floor, my love.”

 

Clarke smiles a Cheshire cat smile, her eyes glistening with the impending trickery and deceit that they were about to bestow upon the Ice Queen.

 

//

 

Lexa was in her throne room sparing with her guards, usually she tries to go easy on them, but today she was distracted and anxious. They were currently implementing Clarke’s plan to keep Roan in Nia’s good graces and keep information about her schemes flowing to them, and by every right it was a good plan, brilliant even, but that didn’t mean that Lexa wasn’t still anxious about it.

 

_*”No, absolutely not.”_

 

_“What’s wrong with it? It’s perfect, it will give Nia credible and semi-important information and will allow her to continue trusting Roan, which will allow us to remain two steps ahead of her.”_

 

 _Lexa had to admit it_ **_WAS_ ** _a good plan, but not with the information Clarke wanted to share. “We can’t announce that we are mated.”_

 

_“Why? Nia wouldn’t dare come near me, I’m not only Wanheda, I am also the leader of Skaikur, the Commander’s mate, and a wonderful shot with an arrow.”_

 

_It was Roan who spoke up, “And those are precisely the reasons she would come after you.”_

 

_Clarke eyed them both suspiciously, she knew that there was more to them rejecting her idea than what they were saying, she spoke slowly “It’s a calculated risk, I’ll admit, but it is one I’m willing to take.” She paused looking at them, daring them to speak, when they remained silent she continued, “That is, unless there is something more you’re not telling me.” She turned her gaze so that it rested solely on Lexa as she spoke; they’d promised that there’d be no more secrets between them and now was when Clarke would know if Lexa intended to keep that promise or not._

 

_They didn’t break eye contact, staring one another down, waiting for the other to back down and concede. Lexa was the first to break. She looked away with a heavy sigh on her lips. “When wolves are mated if their mate dies they become detached from the world, the pain being too much. They mourn, unmoving from their dead mates side, they don’t eat or drink unless there are others to take care of them, and even then it’s a sorry sight. Most die from the pain and the neglect of basic needs.” She pauses and takes a breath, Clarke can tell that this is hard for Lexa to share, she can feel it though their bond, she’s watched someone she cared about go through this - and by the sounds of it, it wasn’t a happy outcome. “The more connected the two are, and the stronger their bond the worse it is. In the legends it’s even worse for true mates” their eyes connect, Lexa was importing Clarke to listen to this part of the story, she needed Clarke to know what would become of them if the other died. “Their other half beinging taken away from them, their soul being stripped from their being and ripped violently in half, they were being shattered after becoming whole. True mates, in the legends, always died from the loss of a mate, even third party intervention wasn’t enough to save them, the pain of their soul being torn apart was too much. Only once has someone survived their true mates death... but he killed himself because of the emptiness that he felt…” She paused again, clearing her voice of the emotion clogging it before continuing, “It’s also said that the one that ‘lives’ can feel their mate slipping away into death, feel their pain, and that’s why they died right then with them.”_

 

_Both Lexa and Clarke’s eyes are glossed over, both trying to hold back the tears beating at the flood gates trying to get though._

 

_Roan is the first to speak, trying to lighten the mood, “Well it’s a good thing that you two aren’t true mates.”_

 

_Neither looked at him and both remained silent, as though they were ashamed of the fact, “Wait, you are, aren’t you? That’s why you were so against the idea Lexa.” The last part wasn’t a question, everything clicked into place, in hindsight Roan should have seen it sooner, but hindsight is always 20/20._

 

 _“Well, we’re definitely not going to give her_ **_that_ ** _information then.”_

 

_“Why not?” Clarke's voice was filled with annoyance_

 

_“Clarke I just told you-”_

 

_“I understand the risks Lex, but I also know that this is our best chance at getting Nia to play her hand quickly.”_

 

_Now it was Lexa’s turn to express annoyance and anger, “It’s not just your decision to make, it’s mine to!” her voice began to rise in both pitch and volume, panic seeping through, “I CAN’T LOSE YOU CLARKE! DON’T YOU GET THAT?” her voice began to lower into a pathetic whisper, “If I lost you it would kill me, bonded or not.”_

 

_Clarke embraced Lexa, pulling her tightly against her own form, “You’re not going to lose me ok? You and Lincoln have been teaching me to defend myself and my wolf knows what to do.” her hand is moving down from the top of Lexas head to the bottom, a soothing gesture used by parents to calm their children, Clarke could remember her mother doing the same for her when she got upset as a child, or when her dad would hug her tightly and reassure her that everthing was going to work out ok. She smiled, with tears of recollection running down her cheeks, voice soft and playful “Besides, I’m stronger than Nia, let her come for me, it’ll just give me an excuse to end her.”*_

 

Lexa still couldn’t believe that she’d conceded to Clarke, she couldn’t believe that she’d allowed Clarke to talk her into putting her in danger. She couldn’t believe that she’d allowed Roan to leave that room with the intention of going to wherever the Ice Queen was lurking and telling her that they were bonded (they weren’t going to tell her how deep the bond ran), telling her that the best way to get at Lexa was to kill Clarke, take Wanheda’s power and deal a fatal blow to Lexa by killing her mate, they knew Nia would do it herself, she wanted the power, she wanted the satisfaction of being the one to hurt Lexa. These thoughts fueled Lexa’s attack, she was fighting blindly, rage at Nia, Clarke, and herself clouding her vision.

 

She’d managed to convince Clarke to stay with either herself, Indra, Anya or Gustus at all times and that she’d spar with Lexa everyday until she got Lexa on her ass from combat skill alone and then as quickly as possible. Right now Lexa was getting out her frustration on her guards before her sparring session with Clarke, she didn’t want to hurt her, but she needed to hurt something.

 

Though she was fighting blindly, letting her anger fuel and control her actions she was still acutely aware when Clarke entered the room. The energy in the room changed, Lexa felt her whole body relax while still being combat ready when the blondes scent washed over her, when she could feel her eyes on her back as she danced around the room sending her guards to the ground, dealing fatal blows of they were using real weapons. She could sense both her physical presence - the way her breath hitched when Lexa just avoided a nasty blow to the face, the way her heart sped up with ever complex maneuver she did, and the way her pheromones changed to ones of want - and her aura presence - feel her there through their bond - in the room.

 

Clarke’s presence both distracted her and spurred her one, making her fight harder and faster. When the last of her guards were on the ground groaning in pain she stood in the centre of the chaos at the heart of the room, chest heaving from the effort.

 

Clarke walks up to her, eyes blown wide, “My turn.”

 

Lexa doesn’t reply and before Clarke can ask if she’s heard her or not she’s on her ass wondering when her feet left the ground. “What the-” there’s a soft ouff sound as Clarke lands hard on the concrete floor. Lexa had swept Clarke’s feet out from under her in a manner of seconds, using her own leg in a gliding motion to knock her to the ground. Lexa now stood looking down at Clarke as she laid sprawled on the ground swearing, “Jesus Lexa, what the fuck was that?”

 

“You’re unfocused.” She said turning to where a towel was draped over the arm of her throne, “If I were an enemy you’d be dead.”

 

“If you were an enemy I wouldn’t be distracted.” Clarke contoured coming to her feet, rubbing the area on her ass that she’d landed on.

 

“Then perhaps I shouldn’t be the one to spar with you.”

 

“But-”

 

“No, if you’re not going to train properly or effectively with me then you must train with another, I can’t have you unable to protect yourself if you don’t have a bow.” Her voice was commanding and held an air of finality to it, there was no room for argument, Lexa had made up her mind, “Gustus.” she called nodding to Clarke, he returned her nod and entered the designated ‘ring’.

 

“Lexa you can’t be serious.”

 

“I am, you must concentrate and develop your skills.”

 

“Gustus is twice my size.”

 

“You expect that people wanting to kill you will take that into account? ‘No I can’t fight Clarke I’m larger than her, guess I’ll just have to get the shorter guy in’.” Lexa looked at Clarke as though she’d just said the most ridiculous thing in the world, speaking in a strange high pitched mocking voice. She had a point, but she was letting her emotions allow her to become petty in her argument.

 

She sighed, “Clarke, please. You’re capable of fighting and beating Gustus, you’ve trained with both Niko and Lincoln.”

 

Clarke let out a huff, she knew she was being unnecessarily difficult, but ever since she’d suggested that they have Roan tell Nia about their bond Lexa had been irrationally protective, wanting herself or one of her trusted guards (friends) be with Clarke at all times and she was getting over it, Lexa had been so worried since Roan had left, jumping at any small noise, tensing for an attack.

 

They were both too stubborn to let the situation pass without being rebellious in one way or another.

 

Clarke knew she shouldn’t fight with her anger, that she should fight with her head - it was smarter, safer. But right now she didn’t want to be smart or safe, she just wanted to feel, even if that meant that what she felt was pain, she just needed to feel something other than frustration and anger.

 

She spun suddenly, rounding on Gustus suddenly, aiming her annoyance at Lexa’s overprotectiveness at him, using all her speed and strength in her attack. Gustus hadn’t been expecting the sudden onslaught but quickly adapted, blocking Clarke’s advances and pushing with his own.

 

They two were locked in a fight of wills, both as strong and fast as the other, and though Clarke had been training her skills were still lacking in comparison to Gustus, but he was holding back. Lexa was commenting on Clarke’s stance and arm positions, pointing out where her weak points were and what she needed to do to improve them, and as if to drive the message home Gustus would then hit them to prove the point. This fueled Clarke’s attack, and she snapped at Gustus who seemed to only be illustrating what Lexa said rather than sparring with her, “Stop holding back.” she grunted out between blows, shoving him hard in her annoyance.

 

Gustus continued to remain on the defensive, blocking her advances with all the skill of the advanced warrior he was. “FIGHT BACK!” Clarke screamed at him as her advances became more violent and erratic. She landed a swift left hook to his jaw, causing him to stumble and look stunned for a moment. Clarke’s chest heaved from the physicality of their stalemate. Gustus’s hand went to his jaw, a small smile in his eyes before they went to Lexa who gave him a small nod.

 

When Gustus returned to the ring Clarke didn’t even have time to think of her next advance because Gustus implemented his own. She managed to block his advances for a short time, but her skill was no match for his, he landed a hard hit to her gut, she dropped her arms leaving her face unprotected and that's when he landed, in quick concession, a left uppercut and right hook sending Clarke crashing into the floor.

 

//

 

When Clarke woke up she was outside, she could hear birds songs, insects chirping, and the wind soaring through the trees rustling the leaves, catching those that fell and sending them soaring through the sky. She didn’t open her eyes, she just wanted to enjoy the sounds for a moment. “You’re awake.” The voice was soft, there was relief laced in it, but also guilt.

 

Clarke opened her eyes and saw Lexa seated cross-legged in front of her, a bowl of water tainted by streams and droplets of crimson that became diluted and turned the water a weak shade of red. Clarke knew it was blood, the smell filled her nostrils and made her stomach growl, her body keen for the hunt. Her eyes swept back to Lexa though, checking her for injuries.

 

“It’s not mine.”

 

No, the blood was Clarke’s, Gustus must have hit her harder than she’d thought. When she went to speak only a whine came out, Lexa let a small laugh slip from her lips, “I forced the changed when you had a brief moment of consciousness to speed up the healing process.”

 

Clarke could feel it now, she was in her wolf form, she could feel her wolf and her needs, no wonder the need for a hunt was so strong.

 

Lexa stands and takes a step back, shifting into her wolf form, “Shall we hunt my love?” Clarke responded by getting up and racing off into the woods, letting her wolf guide her actions. She hears Lexa’s deep comforting chuckle though their bond, “I’ll take that as a yes then.”

 

//

 

Their hunt took them well into the late afternoon, both managing to run down a few rabbits and worked together to catch a deer, they were both stuffed and the sun was slowing falling from the sky, setting it alight with an ambiance of colour as it went, promising not to be forgotten and to return in the morning. They sat in a clearing in the trees, basking in the last heat of the rays for the day, enjoying their time together without being worried about what Nia was up to, or what their people need them.

 

They were free to just be.

 

Be in the moment with one another, be themselves and not what people needed or expected them to be; absolutely free. If only for a moment.

 

Lexa scooted closer to Clarke, her wolf wanting to be connected with her content and peaceful form before the human side of Lexa ruined it.

 

“Clarke.” Lexa’s voice broke her out of her hazed trance state the afternoon had put her in, it had been a perfect fantasy, but that’s just what it was - a fantasy - now it was time to get back to reality, and apart of that was dealing with how Lexa and herself had been towards one another since her suggestion to keep Nia trusting Roan.

 

“I know Lexa.”

 

Lexa’s face contorted into one of confusion, only because they were still in their wolf forms it looked like she was about to cough up a hairball and Clarke started laughing, her wolf letting out an excited whine. The sound sent Lexa’s heart soaring, that’s all she wanted, was to bring Clarke happiness, not anger and frustration.

 

Clarke could feel Lexa’s feelings, “I know Lexa.”

 

Lexa nudged into Clarke’s neck, nuzzling her. “I think it’s been so bad - our anger and annoyance at one another and the situation-”

 

“I-”

 

“Let me finish.” When Lexa didn’t interject again she continued, “I think it’s been so bad because we can feel how one anothers feeling, and when it’s strong we can feel it ourselves… I think… I think that because we’re both feeling those things it intensified our own emotions to the point it caused us to lash out at one another.” She paused, “When I felt those things I didn’t feel like me, I knew it was irrational but I couldn’t help it. I’m sorry Lex, I know you were just trying to keep me safe - us safe - I didn’t mean to lash out, but as much as it was a decision for us to make together because we’re partners - mates - it was still my decision in the end to make, and I’m sorry if that hurts you but it’s the truth. I’m still my own person, I still make my own decisions and when it comes to my safety the decision **_is_ ** mine; as much as you wish it were yours.” She smiles down at her, “Though if it were up to you I’d never leave your sight.”

 

Lexa chuckles, “You’re right Clarke I would, I never want to be without you.” she pauses moving to look at Clarke, “The decision **is** yours Clarke, but I’m not going to apologize for wanting to keep you safe, I have to, it’s something that's encoded in my DNA, I know you feel the same.”

 

It was true, Clarke had an innate desire - a need - to protect Lexa, she knew it was a wolf thing, and even more strongly she knew it was a mate thing, but she wasn’t going to allow it to define her decision, you can’t live without risk, and if you’re living without some kind of risk are you really living?

 

“But I am sorry that I made you feel like I was belittling the fact that it was your decision to make, I just… I love you so much and I can’t bare the thought of losing you - especially to something that I could have prevented.”

 

“I know, babe, but you have to trust me and trust in my decision. I know that you do because you came around in the end.” Clarke was beginning to smile and tease Lexa, the heavy part of their conversation was over, they’d said what they needed to say and they both felt better for it, they felt the anger and animosity from the past couple of days slip away.

 

Lexa groaned and her wolf growled moving protectively in front of Clarke and guarding her throat, “Don’t remind me.”

 

 _‘Ok, perhaps not a topic to joke about just yet’_ Clarke thought. But she wanted to turn the evening playful, and she was in just the right position to do so.

 

She jumped to the left so that her body was no longer supporting Lexa’s weight only to round back and pounce on Lexa as she collapsed onto the ground. Clarke now stood over Lexa, looking down on her, Lexa looked up at her with mock annoyance but in her features her love and fondness for Clarke was evident. Clarke on the other hand wore a smirk on her lips and a devilish glint in her eyes as she shifted back to human form. Her naked form fell into the plush soft fur that made up Lexa’s chest and she snuggled into her, loving her scent and the way her fur felt against her bare skin.

 

Lexa whined and struggled not to move under Clarke, it was difficult for her to lay on her back in wolf form without falling onto her side, when snuggled deepening into her plush fur Lexa got a devilish thought of her own, _‘Alright Clarke, if that’s how you want to play.’_ she followed Clarke’s lead and shifted back into her human form. Now Clarke lay atop of a equally as naked Lexa.

 

“Lexa!” she mock scolded, “I was so comfy, why’d you do that?”

 

“Well, I thought it was only fair that I was able to snuggle into you.”

 

“But you were my very own soft fluffy full body pillow, and don’t even get me started on how you felt against me.”

 

Lexa’s eyes darkened, her voice laced with lust and a smirk placed firmly on her face, “Oh trust me, I know.”

 

Clarke laughed, “Yeah well, now I’m just laying ontop of you and-” Clarke seemed to realise what she was saying mid-sentence and the implications of it. Her eyes grew dark and she let out a low possessive growl. The sound sent Lexa into a frenzy, she flipped them so that she was now straddling Clarke’s hips and pinning her hands above her head; she bent down taking Clarke’s bottom lip between her own giving it a gentle tug and biting down on it.

 

The action sent the blonde into a ravenous state, she moaned loudly, trying to recapture Lexa’s lips as they drifted across her jaw line and descended down her neck, the sharp nips then soft soothings of Lexa’s lips and tongue making blind with lust and causing heat to pool between her thighs. She fought Lexa’s hold on her hands, aching to touch her love.

 

When Lexa tusked at Clarke’s attempts at freedom, the younger wolf whining, needing to touch her mate, to feel her, her voice was high pitched, laced with need and desire, “Lexa please, I need you, I need to feel you.”

 

The reciprocating growl from Lexa was purely primal, her wolf taking over her actions, Clarke could feel the power rippling off her in waves, her own wolf coming to the surface to add her power to Lexa’s and be with her. Lexa’s voice deep with sin when she spoke, more growl than words, “You have me Love. You’re **_mine_ ** Clarke, and I am **_yours._ ** ”

 

She kissed Clarke deeply releasing the blonde’s hands, which flew to Lexa’s neck, pulling her impossibly closer before roaming into her hair tugging at it ripping a groan of pleasure from the brunette before moving down to her shoulder blades, which she promptly dug her nails into when Lexa released her kiss swollen lips moving to suck on her pulse point, driving her wild.

 

Clarke had had enough of the floor play, she needed more and she couldn’t get it in her current position. She sat up taking Lexa with her before rolling them over and placing her thigh between Lexa’s toned thighs, rocking it against her hot dripping center. Clarke’s skin was soon slick with Lexa’s arousal and the waves of heat that radiated from her turned Clarke on to the point where she almost came then and there.

 

Clarke released a hiss of breath and a strangled moan that ripped though her throat, she didn’t know it was this possible to be this turned on, “Jesus Lex’s, you’re so fucken wet for me.” Lexa only whimpered in return, her brain was incapable of formulating a coherent sentence or even a small string of words at this point, only grunts, moans and half-formed words left her lips, but as she grounded her hips against Clarke’s thigh Clarke knew what her loved wanted and needed.

 

Clarke lips traveled down Lexa’s body, detouring from their main goal and clasping around her perked pebbled nipple, sucking on it, exciting loud moans of ecstasy from her Alpha. Clarke’s right hand flew up to give the other nipple attention, rolling it between her thumb and forefinger, tugging on it softly, her other hand placed on Lexa’s hips, stopping her from bucking her off with her need to find friction between her legs.

 

Lexa’s breath was coming out short and sharp, she was so close, “Ahhh Clarke, Clarke… I’m… I’m” She screamed Clarke’s name as she came hard, her back arched and her body shook with the intensity of her orgasm, Clarke never relented on her pleasuring of Lexa, letting her nipple go with a pop and moving down her body, sucking and nipping as she went. Clarke reached her center and placed a quick kisses along the inside of Lexa’s thighs before diving into her pussy, sending new waves of pleasure through her body, riding her into another orgasm on the back of her first, the two blending together into one mind shattering orgasm.

 

When Lexa had finally come down from her orgasms Clarke moved up and kissed her lips slowly and deeply, the sounds of the forest surrounding them and putting them to ease. “Hi.” She whispered.

 

Lexa’s eyes were droopy, her lids heavy, and she has a dopey smile on her face “Hello my love.”, her movements are laboured as she joins their lips in a slow relaxed kiss. They kissed lightly for a long moment before Clarke deepened it, her desire and lust for her mate renewed.

 

The revving up of Clarke’s hormones and the change in her pheromones gave Lexa a renewed sense of energy. She surged forward, cupping Clarke’s cheeks as she captured her lips, the flip over, Lexa on top of Clarke. Lexa pulls away, Clarke’s lips chasing after her. Lexa’s gaze is soft and hooded, her love shinning through over her lust, “I love you so much Clarke,” her eyes grew and darkened “and I’m going to make you scream my name so that the whole of Polis hears it from your lips.”

 

Clarke whimpered and growled as Lexa dove into her dripping cunt, licking and lapping up her arousal, humming in appreciation, loving the unique and tangy taste of Clarke.

 

“I love your taste Clarke, I love everything about you.” Her words vibrated through Clarke’s core, sending waves of pleasure through her body. Clarke was so close after seeing Lexa fall apart beneath her that she wasn’t going last long.

 

“Lex, please.”

 

“I’ve got you, Clarke,” Lexa said diving back into Clarke, sucking on her sensitive nub, swiping it back and forth. Clarke was whining, her breathing laboured and shallow, Lexa knew she was close and she continued her assault on Clarke’s clit as she sunk two fingers into her hot tight centre. She felt Clarke’s walls tighten around her digits, her words came out in a hissed whisper, “Fuck Clarke, you’re so hot. Cum for me baby.”

 

“Ahhh Lexa, mmmh babe… I’m cumming… LEXA!”

 

Clarke came with a scream and Lexa’s name on her lips as she fell into the bliss of her orgasm.


	12. If I take your Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Octavia and Lincoln loving in this chapter and a betrayal most foul.

It had been a week since Roan had told Nia about their relationship and Nia has been quiet since. They’ve seen her lingering around, no doubt trying to get a sense of if what Roan had told her was the truth or not, but she’d never approached them, never made her presence known in the spectacle that she usually did - and this was had Lexa on edge.

 

Lexa knew Nia, she was cold and calculating, but she was also someone who drew attention, she lived off it. So the fact that she was going out of her way to avoid getting on their radar let Lexa know that she was planning something, and soon.

 

Not only did Lexa have to contend with Nia and her plans but Clarke’s friends, Raven and Octavia, had come to Polis, watching over them and trying to separate them from Clarke long enough for the two to share a stolen kiss was proving difficult for the Commander. Even more difficult was her not killing them herself. It wasn’t until they’d arrived that Clarke told her that she’d confided in them about being a wolf - she’d shown them before she’d left to come to Polis - Lexa was glad that her mate felt comfortable enough with them to share something that she was afraid would cause people to shun her and treat her differently to the girl they’d previously known, Lexa was glad that her love had people who she trusted wholeheartedly and that would be there for her, and accept her, no matter what.

 

And as much as Lexa was glad that her mate had those things, the people that offered them weren’t exactly her favourite. Ever since they’d arrived they’d been giving her grief about turning their friend against her will, at first Lexa had gone to defend herself, to explain that she’d never knowingly do something to hurt Clarke or make her do something against her will, but then they’d started laughing at her worried expression and Clarke had informed her that they were just joking - Lexa didn’t find it funny. 

 

The joking Lexa could handle - barely - but what she couldn’t stand was the blatant disrespect they had, not only for her title but for her as a person. And it dawned on her that perhaps they weren’t so forgiving or ok with what she’d done to Clarke. 

 

She finally snapped one night after they’d all had dinner together, Lexa and Clarke sat on one side of the table, hands folded in one another's under the table, whilst Raven and Octavia sat against to them. Octavia was complaining about eating one of the vegetables - a mutated strain of brotherly Clarke had informed Lexa -  “Don’t worry O, you don’t have to eat it… That is unless Lexa makes you.” Raven gave Lexa a pointed look then, her gaze fiery and alight with challenge. Lexa worked her jaw and squeezed her hands into fists, nails biting into flesh and drawing blood, it was all she could do to stop herself from growling at the girl.

 

“Raven.” Clarke settled an icy glare on her friend, who ignored her and continued to look at Lexa. When she remained silent Raven continued, determined to get a rise out of the Commander, she’d taken all they’d had to dish out without reacting thus far, but Raven was going to make sure she got the message, “What?” She said shifting her gaze to Clarke, “Oh right, it’s  _ ‘her wolf’ _ that makes choices for people without their consent, my bad.” 

 

“Raven I swear to god.”

 

“What Clarke? You know it’s true. Someone has to say something because you’re too ‘in love’ to do anything about it, and Octavia doesn’t want to get in Lexa’s bad books because she wants to spend time with Lincoln, but I’m not afraid of her-” she said fixing her gaze back on the steadily stiffening  Commander, “I’m not afraid to speak the truth. She made a life changing decision for you Clarke, something that could have killed you! And you don’t even seem to care. Someone had to be the voice of reason here.” 

 

“Raven I said that’s enough.” Lexa was still yet to speak, her nails digging further and further into her flesh until blood started to drip out of her closed palm and onto the table top below, pooling around her fist.

 

Clarke smelt the blood when Lexa’s nails first broke her skin, but now the air was stained in the crimson metallic tang of it, Lexa’s whole body was vibrating with the will it was taking her to control her Alpha and not put Raven in her place, and Clarke was grateful for that, but she knew that she couldn’t let anyone talk to her mate like that. So when Raven tried to speak again Clarke snapped. She slammed her fist down on the table, sending everyone around it flinching away from the horrendous noise, “I SAID THAT WAS ENOUGH RAVEN!” Clarke allowed a growl to be present in her voice, her authority to seep through her words, “You will not talk about Lexa like that, she didn’t do it on purpose it’s not her fault-” she wrapped her hand over Lexa’s, splaying it against the table so that she’d stop digging her nails in further, she knew Lexa wasn’t proud or happy that she’d turned Clarke, they both knew it was an accident but Lexa also knew that her wolf was going to do it, even without Lexa’s permission and that ranked her with guilt - especially when Raven was all but saying the same thing, “She is my mate and I LOVE HER, you will treat her with respect, or…Or you can leave.” 

 

Raven’s shocked, she can’t believe that Clarke just told her to get lost if she couldn’t like Lexa, she was dumbfounded, she just looked between the two slacked jawed and wide eyed. Turning her gaze to Octavia she found no ally in the girl who had her head bowed down, staring intently at her plate of food yet to be eaten.

 

Raven looks back to the wolves still lost for words, “I….I.” 

 

“Save it Raven, you won’t mean anything you say so I don’t want to discuss it any longer.” With that Clarke raised from her chair, pulling Lexa along with her. Lexa was still shaking violently, her wolves anger pliable and radiating from her, Clarke could feel it coming off in hot stifling waves, she did her best to soothe her mate, sending out calming pheromones, trying to placate some of her wolves anger.

 

“Good night Octavia.”

 

Octavia’s head remains down as she gives a mumbled “Night Clarke.”

 

Clarke turns her attention back to Raven, “Raven.” she say with a curt nod, not waiting for a reply before exiting the room, her own anger at her friend building and threatening to consume her in this moment, but she had to push it aside; as angry as she was at Raven disrespecting her mate she’d be even more livid knowing that Lexa was hurting and she did nothing to heal her because she was so consumed by her own emotions.

 

They made it back to their room, Lexa was still allowing herself to be lead by Clarke, face void and empty. Clarke sat her on the edge of their bed, kneeling before her, clasping her hands in her own. “Lexa, hey Lex. Babe, please look at me.” 

 

Lexa’s gaze slowly shifted from the empty place on the wall here she’d been mindlessly staring to the steely blue pools of the woman she loved, “Nothing Raven said was true Lexa, you got that? You did nothing wrong. I don’t blame you for anything.”

 

Lexa let out a humourless laugh, “But she’s not.” when she spoke her voice was rough, it sounded as though she were dehydrated and her voice worn from in use, “I robbed you of the chose, I took that away from you.” 

 

“No Lexa. I would have chosen you - this, us - I will always choose you.”

 

Lexa’s eyes were wet with unshed tears, green pools ashine with emotion, brighter than Clarke had ever seen them, “I’m so sorry Clarke.”

 

“Shhh baby, you have nothing to be sorry for.”

 

They crawled up onto the bed, Lexa surrounded by the comforting presence of Clarke’s arms - engulfed in their protection and warmth - while Clarke murmured sweet nothings and reassurance into her ear. They stayed like this for the rest of the evening, Lexa curled around Clarke like she was her only stabilizing force, the only thing keeping her rooted to this world, and Clarke whispering the words of her love for Lexa in her ear, a declaration of what is and what is to come, that her life didn’t start until Lexa came into it, that she was trapped in a place she didn’t want to be, soulless and dead.

 

Lexa was Clarke’s light, the thing that awakened her from her living sleep, that brought her back to life when all she thought she could feel was the responsibility for her people. Lexa was her everything, and she had to make Lexa see that without her, Clarke was a shell. She could be - she could exist - but she couldn’t live.

 

“I love you, Lexa, with everything that I am and everything that I have.”

 

//

 

After that night Raven hadn’t been around much, and when she was she seldom spoke. She couldn’t forgive Lexa - not yet. She still felt that she’d taken Clarke’s choice away from her, that she’d forced her into something that she may not have wanted but had no choice or say in now. She wasn’t ready to forgive, but she couldn’t lose Clarke either, so she kept her mouth shut about it. 

 

Clarke was grateful for that at least, she didn’t want to choose between her sisters and her love, but if she had to, as much as it pained her, she would choose Lexa a thousand times over, no matter the cost. 

 

Octavia, on the other hand, couldn’t contain her joy and became the focal point for most of their conversations. She was in love, and what a marvellous thing it was. She and Lincoln had been spending much time together since she came to Polis, she’d asked him to train her, to make her strong, and he had.

 

* _ “I want you to teach me to fight.” She fiery brunette said, stalking up to the tall lean bald man, who stood a head taller than her and whose body was covered in tribal tattoos’ and a sheen of sweat. He looked at her, eyes hooded, darkened from the adrenaline running through his veins and the excitement of the fight that he’d just concluded with one of the guards. A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips. _

 

_ “And why would I do that?” he said reaching for his shirt that was carelessly tossed on the ground beside her. _

 

_ “Because I asked.” _

 

_ Lincoln raised an eyebrow, a smile tugging harder at his lips “I don’t recall you asking for anything Strik Gona.” _

 

_ Octavia smirked, confident in her abilities, “Says the man calling me ‘Little Warrior’.” _

 

_ A crimson storm overtook Lincoln’s cheeks, he’d been teaching her Trigedasleng back at Skaikru’s camp, but not since then. He also hadn’t thought she was paying attention to what he’d been saying. “I’ve been practising with Clarke.” was all Octavia offered in explanation. _

 

_ Lincoln cleared his throat, “She’s a good teacher.”  _

 

_ “She is, but you’re better.” Lincoln looked into the eyes of the girl that had fallen from the sky, deep pools of green, tinged with flecks of crystal blue meet his with a fierce fire ignited within them, his wolf was ensnared and he was a goner. _

 

_ “Ok.” _

 

_ “Ok?” _

 

_ “I’ll teach you.” _

 

_ They’d began that day and had been training for two - four hours every day since then, Octavia was improving, she didn’t have the underlying skills that Clarke had had when they’d started, but she had a natural talent for movement, she was graceful and quick on her feet (well quick for a human), watching her was like watching the dance of death - so utterly hypnotising in its beauty that you didn’t know you were dead until the fatal blow had already been landed. Lincoln watched her get stronger and more confident, her movements more sure and strong, her blows fiercer and more precise as their time went on. _

 

_ He could feel his heart swell with pride and admiration for her. They’d spoken of her life before in the sky, of her time as a prisoner for simply being born, of her brother, of her friends that were more like her family, and that’s when Lincoln knew that he'd always do everything in his power to protect and love this woman, even if she never knew it, or loved him back, there was a light in her - a magic - he simply could live without.  _

 

_ They were having a particularly brutal training session, Octavia blocking and countering Lincoln’s every move and he doing the same, they knew each other well, after weeks of training together and getting to know one another they were so in-tune to one another that they could predict the others next move. They were using swords today, a treat for Octavia’s advancement with her hand to hand combat skills. They’d became locked in a stalemate, steel pressed against steel, both pressing with all their strength (well Lincoln with all his ‘human’ strength) vying for the upper hand in this battle. Their faces were close, their breaths shooting out in clouds of heat onto one another, eyes darting from their entangled swords to eyes, to lips and back again. _

 

_ Octavia’s arms were weakening, and as they began to tremble under the weight of Lincoln force she thought that the battle was done, that she’d lost, but then she saw her opening, her way of winning. _

 

_ Octavia looked into the deep caramel brown of Lincoln’s gaze, he froze. Stricken by her, by her pheromones, by her intent. His wolf would not allow him to fight her, not now, not that he wanted to either.  _

 

_ Everything was in slow motion as if it were a dream, could he dare think it’s real?  _

 

_ Octavia leant forward and sealed their lips with a kiss, he heard something clatter to the ground, but he couldn’t bring himself to care what it was, it didn’t matter, he was kissing her. _

 

_ He made to move his arms around her waist, to pull her closer to him, when suddenly he was on the ground, flat on his back, the warmth of her lips were gone, and him wondering what happened. Above him, with the sun illuminating her from behind stood Octavia with her blade trained on her throat, “You forgot your first two lessons Lincoln.” she said smiling down at him, “Never get distracted, and never let your opponent get the upper hand.” _

 

_ She moved her sword to the side offering him her hand which he graciously accepted. Before they could leave the training area Octavia stopped, Lincoln looked back at her, concern etched on his features. Her eyes shone with tears welling up only to never be shed, “Thank you, Lincoln.”  _

 

_ “For what?” _

 

_ “For making me strong.” She said meeting his own soft gaze with her steady one.  _

 

_ Lincoln let a small genuine smile tug at his lips before saying with the utmost conviction, “You’ve always been strong Octavia.” Before turning around and walking away without another word.* _

 

_ // _

 

“O, you can’t just kiss him and leave it at that.”

 

“I know.”

 

“You have to talk about it with him, what you want, what you feel.”

 

“I know.”

 

“Then why the hell are you sitting here talking to us?” Raven’s inquisition of the girl continued, while Clarke was in her own head processing what Octavia had told them, she barely noticed when both of her friends turned to her, questioning looks on their faces.

 

“Mmmh, sorry what was that?”

 

“And you’re meant to be the one with superhuman hearing.” Raven scoffed

 

Octavia slapped her before nervously asking her question, her voice was quiet and hesitant, it reminded Clarke of a child asking their parent for a cookie, she was fidgeting, pulling at her clothing with her hands, straightening and smoothing invisible creases and crinkles - ok well not invisible, they were there, she’d just never cared for their existence before this moment.

 

Clarke reached out steadying the hand of the girl she saw as her younger sister, “O, what is it? You can tell me.” She said softly, calming the girl.

 

Octavia let out a shaky breath, “I asked what you thought, do you think that I should be with Lincoln, he’s a wolf like does that work? How does that work? I mean that is if he even likes me at all, I’m completely assuming here and-” 

 

“Octavia!” Clarke cut the girl off from her ramblings, grasping her hands a tad more forcefully than needed.

 

“Thank christ, if you didn’t shut her up I was going to throw myself out the window.” 

 

“Not helping Ray.”

 

“Sorry, Princess but it’s true.”

 

“O, I can tell you with the utmost certainty that Lincoln has feelings for you. As for if wolves and non-wolves can be mated or not, they can-” Clarke heard Raven scoffed before walking off to look out the floor to ceiling window, she knew it was about Lexa turning her, but she couldn’t bring herself to care, “-and they can have a very happy life together… The thing with wolves is, it’s about who your wolf chooses, not who you chose- ” Clarke pauses, thinking about how to best describe this, “It’s like your wolf can feel what is missing - who is missing - and they know who that person is by sight and they take over, doing the craziest things to make that person theirs… With Lexa, I hated her after she turned me, I was so angry, but at the same time, I couldn’t be… I always felt a pull towards her, I knew I could trust her, even when I didn’t know her-” Clarke allows a small nostalgic smile caressed her face, “She felt it too, when we first meet it was because she was hunting and her wolf made her stay and watch me,” 

 

Clarke thought she heard Raven mutter something about her being dinner but she ignored her and focused her attention on Octavia and her memories, “After I shot her she told me things about herself, things she wouldn’t have of her own volition, things she couldn’t understand why she was telling me - an outsider, an enemy… - It was because her wolf saw me” Clarke looked into Octavia’s eyes, “She saw my soul - my wolf, even though I didn’t have her yet - she saw that we were bound I guess… And now… Now I feel empty without Lexa, she’s made me whole.”

 

“That’s beautiful Clarke… But how can you know that I do that to Lincoln?”

 

Clarke lets out a small wet laugh, “Because he sees  _ you  _ O.” 

 

//

 

“So how’s it going with Blondie?” Wack, “You two trying to make pups yet?” wack.

 

“Enough Anya.” Lexa surged forward, using the wooden stick she knocked her friend's feet out from under her then trained it on her throat. A smirk gracing her features, “If you had been paying attention instead of mocking my love life you would’ve seen that coming.” 

 

“I don’t know, maybe you were just lucky.”

 

“You know damn well it’s not luck, not after how you trained me.” 

 

Anya laughed as she got to her feet, “No, I suppose you’re right. I’m amazing.”

 

“I never said you were amazing.”

 

“It was implied.” Anya’s smile faltered when she looked back at Lexa, “Truly Lexa, how’s it been since Roan told Nia your ‘secret’?” 

 

Lexa sighed, she’d been avoiding this for as long as she could, the anger and frustration it caused was not worth her time, “We’ve heard nothing, Roan says that his mother is implementing a plan, but he doesn’t know what yet.” 

 

“For you or Clarke?”

 

“She hasn’t told him, but you and I both know that she’ll go after Clarke, not only is she my mate, but she’s also Wanheda, she possess a power Nia can only wish for.” 

 

Anya nods solemnly, before hardening her gaze, “So what are we going to do Commander?”

 

“We’re going to protect Clarke at all costs, and then I’m going to kill that bitch.”

 

//

 

Titus hadn’t been as overtly hostile towards Clarke as of late, she knew that he watched her interacting with the people, following her around the markets and out into the forest where she went to spar and learn with Lincoln, he would follow her until she turned and lost him, but he’d always manage to be waiting for her when she returned.

 

As much as it annoyed Clarke to have the perpetually angry man following her around she knew that, like Anya, Gustus, Lincoln, and Indra it was because Lexa had requested it - though she didn’t know why Lexa would get him to tail her for ‘safety’ he was human, and he hated her… Maybe it was Lexa’s way to get him on side. Clarke could only speculate as to why, but she knew that Lexa had her reasons and that was enough for her.

 

Clarke went out into the forest to where a small water gully lay, she sat and drew the flowing stream, listening to the sounds of nature, letting it calm and sooth her, Nia hadn’t yet made her move, and that had them all on edge.

 

Clarke was almost finished her sketch when she notices that the forest around her had gone quiet, she stood up and listened. There was nothing, the birds a ceased singing, the insects had dispersed, not even the sound of the rustling wind dare enter this area of the forest. She wasn’t alone, something - or someone - was out there; a predator, stalking its prey. She only hoped for its sake it didn’t see her as prey. 

 

“Who's there?” she called out into the void, her voice loud and echoing in the absence of sound. When she received no reply she remained standing there, listening and looking, waiting for anything to jump out at her to tell her who or what was out there.

 

She saw a tall, lanky figure shift from behind a tree trunk and sniffed the air, it was Titus. He walked out from the shadow of the ancient trees and into the small clearing where Clarke waiting by her small stream. “Titus.” She said in greeting, he merely leered at her.

 

“What are you doing here?” Nothing, “Did Lexa send you to keep an eye on me?” Again she received nothing from her questions and her frustration grew, something wasn’t right.

 

She began moving slowly, creeping towards the edge of the forest, Titus followed her with his eyes, beady and black in their hatred for her.

 

“Titus I don’t want to hurt you, but if you don’t tell me what you’re doing here right now you’ll leave me no choice.”

 

The man let out a dry humourless laugh, “You dare presume to threaten me, girl? You are nothing!” he spat the words at her, filled with contentment and barely caged rage.

 

Clarke ceased her retreat to the forest's edge holding still at his words, her wolf was screaming at her to get out of there, but Clarke wouldn’t let this man win, she wasn’t afraid of him and she didn’t run from a fight. “If I’m nothing why is it that you corner me when I am alone?” 

 

“Because what I do, I do for Heda. You taint her, you bring her down when all she does is elevate you. She says you’re ‘ _ special’ _ I don’t see it.” His eyes grow colder the closer he gets to her, his words harsher, with more bite and anger behind them, “You are a plague that will destroy us all if I don’t extinguish you first.” 

 

It was then that Clarke heard movement behind her, “Titus what did you do?” 

 

“What I had to to protect Heda.”

 

With that Clarke felt a small arrow fly into her neck, she felt around, taking it out of her neck she saw it was needle like. She began to feel sick like her insides were boiling, her wolf screamed for Lexa but there was nothing, she couldn’t feel Lexa, or anyone else, she was cut off from the entire pack, “What- what have you done?”

 

Before Clarke got her answer Titus moved forward, using a rock he must have picked up from her stream he hit her upside the head in her disorientated and pained state. The blow landed hard and she fell to the ground, the edges of her vision darkening with each passing setting. 

  
As the world faded around her Clarke saw more shadows join Titus’s at the forefront of her vision - she couldn’t tell how many there were, her vision blurred and unconcentrated - and she heard the deep timbre voice of Titus ring through through the tunnel that was her fading consciousness, as though she was underwater being drowned, “I did what I had to do.” With that Clarke faded into the lonely darkness of unconsciousness. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys sorry for the long wait and for the shorter chapter, but I wanted to give you something. You may have noticed that I've finally set the chapters for this story, yes we're almost at the end, thanks for sticking with me through it all and keeping the story alive.... Now in saying that I will be doing a few one-shots for this story after the final chapter so look out for those, and who know's I might change my mind and make it longer ;)


	13. Checkmate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter contains explicit content, minor character death, mentions and descriptions of torture and graphic content.
> 
> But also there's some nice fluff for Bellamy and Raven (Can you guys believe they don't have a ship name?), Linctavia, and a budding something between Anya and Roan.

Clarke’s eyelids are heavy, her mind clouded in a haze that leaves her groggy, she feels a sharp throbbing from her right temple but makes no move to feel what it is. Her body is motionless, – lifeless - her limbs tired and heavy, weighed down by lead sinking down into the never-ending depths of the blue/black abyss of the ocean. Small steps she thinks, she tried to remember where she is, what happened, but her mind comes up blank, the pain in her temple intensifying with the effort. Ok, I’ll start with something simpler then. She thinks, trying to open her eyes. She tries and tries, but no matter how hard she tried the darkness still prevails and is the only thing in her sight. She feels her body sag and her head lull to the side, what the hell happened that trying to open my eyes has become a strenuous activity? She thinks, still unable to piece together what happened to her.  
  
She tries to open her eyes once more, and when she sees nothing but prevailing darkness she thinks she’d once again failed, but there is a slight light pattern like it was shining through the weavings of a tapestry or cloth, and that’s when it hits her. She’s been blindfolded.  
  
What the hell? The sluggish heft that entrances Clarke’s body is beginning to wear off and she can now feel her limbs, sore and achy from the position she’s undoubtedly been in for a long time.  
  
She stays still, waiting for the feeling to wear off some more, pins and needles course through her limbs, they’re slowly waking up, and as uncomfortable as the sensation is Clarke marvels at it; how comforting the annoying pain of pins and needles is after feeling nothing. When the sensation simmered down to a dull ache Clarke was acutely aware of the sharp pain in her temple, she felt a cool stickiness sliding down her temple and knew it was blood, she attempted to remove the blindfold from her eyes and check the ache in her temple that she knew would be a nasty gash. But when she pulled her hands apart she felt a restraint binding them together, the material cut into her flesh viciously, making her hiss as the pain burned through her body.  
  
That’s when she realized that not only were her hands bound behind her back, she was both blindfolded and gagged. The realization of what happened hit her like a bucket of ice water when moments later she heard the cold smug voice of the Ice Queen, “Look who’s finally awake.” Clarke tried to speak but it was muffled by her gag, “Hush child, you must conserve your energy for what is to come.”  
  
Before Clarke could come up with a retort that would be consumed by the material in her mouth Nia removed her blindfold. Clarke was onslaught by light filtering in where Nia was keeping her, she closed her eyes and tried to shield them from the stimulus with her hands, pulling on her bonds and deepening the cuts in her wrists. When her eyes adjusted to the new light she took in her surroundings, she was bound to a large poll that appeared to be positioned in the middle of an equally large tent. There were no furnishings in this tent, and it appeared bear bar for Nia and herself. When Clarke returned her attention to the Queen she saw that Nia wasn’t alone, Titus stood in the large empty tent with them.  
  
Her eyes widened in shock, she knew that Titus disliked her and thought Lexa should relinquish her feeling for her, but she never dreamed that he despised her to the extent that he’d do something like this, that he’d hurt and betray Lexa in such a way.  
  
When he spoke his voice was gruff and cold, his eyes hard and dead, he didn’t look at Clarke, his gaze fixed as though she didn’t even exist, “I did what you asked Nia-” he spat the name as though it tasted of poison, “now keep your word and leave Lexa alone.”  
  
A cruel smile spread its way across Nia’s lips, “But of course Titus.” Clarke saw Nia’s hand move to her belt where a small dagger rested, “I am a woman of my word.” She said whirling around on Titus slicing his throat before he could even scream or Clarke could muster a warning.  
  
As Titus lay dying on the floor of the tent Nia stood over him, “And I gave my word that that mutt Alexandra would fall by my hand, knowing the pain of a thousand deaths-” she said sending a side eye to Clarke, “Knowing the pain of losing her mate.” Titus made a gargling noise like he was trying to speak but it was too late, he was about to die, Nia knelt so that they almost face to face on the ground, “Don’t worry Titus, I’ll send her your regards.”  
  
Titus’s eyes became distant with a fog of gloss forming over them, Clarke knew he was gone, she knew he’d betrayed her and handed her to Nia, and yet she couldn’t help but felt sorry for the man, he’d loved Lexa – in his own way – and wanted what was best for her – even if he was completely wrong about what and who that was. He didn’t deserve this kind of death, and she knew that despite his territory and their recent disagreements Lexa was going to be pained by his death.  
  
Nia raised to her full height, looking down at the body with a mix of childlike glee and disgust. She turned back to Clarke, her trademark smirk that promised cruelty and pain in place, “Oh, don’t worry Wanheda, I’m not going to kill you, not yet. I’m going to make you suffer first, I’m going to make you wish for death, and when I grant it you’re going to blame your mate for not providing it to you herself.” Dead ice blue eyes meet electric blue filled with defiance and resistance, Nia let out a hearty laugh, “Oh, this is going to be fun.”  
  
//

  
It felt like hours, it felt like minutes, it felt like days. Clarke had no sense of time anymore, just the constant darkness, fragmented only by the soft hue of the lantern in the corner of the tent. Nia and her goons had been in periodically beating Clarke, each time the beating left her more battered and bruised, each beating bringing her closer and closer to death. They’d beat her till her eyes were swollen closed, her nose bloodied and broken, leaving her indistinguishable. They’d break her bones one by one with each unanswered question, starting off with her fingers and toes then moving on to her limbs and ribs.

They were beating her till she was blind, broken and within an inch of her life, then leaving her to heal only to do it all over again. Nia never laid her own hands on Clarke, she just stood back and enjoyed the spectacle her guards inflicted when Clarke denied her questions, turning her head in defiance. Clarke was still left weak from the drug Titus had injected her with, its effects still inhibiting her from contacting Lexa or anyone else through the bond, each time she tried her head burned and throbbed, her vision - when she could see - going blurry. Her wolf would let out a low growl, whimper hybrid at the pain of not being able to feel her mate. Each time Clarke tried to reach out to Lexa Nia would dose her again, rendering her incapable of doing so and weakening her both physically and mentally even further.

Clarke was in immense pain as her body healed itself slower than normal - a side effect of the drugs Nia had given her no doubt. Her broken bones were fusing back together and popping into place, torn skin knitting closed, the swelling around her face subsiding so that she could see and speak once more; she could feel it all happening painfully slow, any movement on her part sent a searing pain rippling through her entire being. Though Clarke’s physical body was healing her mental and spiritual states were deteriorating, Nia was breaking her, tearing her apart one shred at a time.

Clarke was left spent and breathing heavily from the effort her body was under the heal, she knew that she couldn’t survive many more of these beatings, her healing was becoming slower and slower, she wasn’t yet to the point where she had human speed healing but with the internal bleeding she was sure she was sustaining she would bleed out internally before she could heal if this kept on. Sleep was pulling at the corners of her mind, her body begging her to give in to the release of sleep, she knew that she shouldn’t, with the beatings she probably had a concussion among other things, but she just couldn’t fight the fatigue in her body any longer. She allowed her body to collapse completely on the ground, her muscles completely loss as she let go, the depths of exhaustion overtaking her and dragging her down into a restless, exhaustion filled ‘sleep’.

//

“WHERE IS SHE!?!” Lexa seethed slamming Roan against the concrete reinforced wall splintering it and sending spiderweb fractures radiating out from where his body made contact with it. Lexa didn’t know who she was referring to in her question, Clarke, Nia, both. It didn’t matter because what she was certain of was where one was the other would be nearby.

“I….I don’t know Lexa.” He grunted out, his words strained and hoarse from Lexa pressing against his throat cutting off his airflow, “I want to find them as much as you do… Please, Lexa - ah” she pressed harder against his throat and his eyes began to lose focus, his words becoming a hissed whisper with the coming darkness of his vision, “I’m… I’m not the enemy.”

Lexa growled but released Roan from her hold, he crumpled over, clutching his aching throat, trying to inhale as much oxygen as he could without hyperventilating. When he felt as though he wasn’t going to pass out he stood up, hand still rubbing the raw flesh around his neck, “I’ll find them Lexa, Nia, and her minions couldn’t have taken her far.”

Lexa waved her hand in the air, her back to Roan, “Go, do what you must Roan.” As Roan was about to leave Lexa spoke again, turning with the fierce unrelenting gaze of the Commander, boring into Roan’s soul, “If anything happens to Clarke it won’t be Nia’s wrath you need fear Roan, it will be mine.”

Roan nodded, his eyes softening he knew her threat was out of concern and hysteria for her mate and her well being and he wasn’t going to fault her on it, “I know Lexa, just like you know we’re going to get her back, no matter the cost.” His eyes turned to steel then, they both knew that if it came to it Nia was going to die in this fight, and if not then soon after. Her death was sealed the moment she concocted the idea to take Clarke, Lexa would personally see to her death herself, and if she couldn’t she knew that Roan, Anya, Gustus, Indra, or any number of her soldiers would take a great deal of pleasure in ending the Ice Witch's life; the only thing left uncertain was when death would come for her, but if Lexa had anything to do with it, she wouldn’t have to wait long.

//

When Roan left Lexa wrapped her arms around herself, trying to give herself some comfort and stop the churning that was currently going on in her stomach. Her wolf was restless, she wanted out, she wanted to hunt Nia down and rip her to shreds for even daring to touch what’s hers, let alone kidnap the love of her life. She paced the length of the room and back, trying to still her wolf. She knew her wolf was close to the surface, she could feel her power rippling over her skin, the need for her to transform almost overpowering; she knew her eyes must be a bright luminescent with how close her wolf was to the surface and her alpha pheromones poured from her prose unchecked in her concern for her mate.

Lexa denied her wolf because she knew that if she was going to get Clarke back unharmed she needed to think logically, she needed to think with her head and not her heart; she couldn’t allow her emotions to rule her in this moment, not when it could mean Clarke’s death.

She’d do anything if it meant that Clarke would be safe.

A heavy hand was placed on her shoulder causing Lexa to cease her pacing for the time being. She knew who it was, his scent wrapped around her like a child's security blanket, comforting and calming her as best anything bar having Clarke in her arms could.

She turned, looking up at the strong tattooed face of her brother, his deep ocean green eyes softening, offering her wordless support. Lexa’s own forest green alight with her emotion and illuminated by her wolves strong presence threatened to spill over with tears she refused to let fall.

She closed her eyes crashing herself into the strong irremovable force that was her brother's ginormous form. He wrapped his arms around his sister's small form, creating a barrier between her and the world, protecting her from the horrors and pain it causes - if only for a moment. Lexa allowed herself to believe that he could protect her from the pain of the world, from the bad people… She allowed herself to believe that lie, if only for a moment, for without it, she’d have nothing.

Burning her face deep in his chest, she allowed the tears to fall uninhibited in the safety of her big brother's embrace. His arms tightened around her, never, in all their lives, had he seen his younger sister break down like this, not even when their parents had died.

Lexa tried to speak, but her words were muffled in his chest. Gustus let a small chuckle escape his lips, he may be a wolf, but even he couldn’t understand her murmurings, “Lexi, I can’t hear you with your face buried in my chest.” He spoke to her softly, like they were children once more, him telling her that mummy and daddy were never coming home again. He spoke as if she were made of glass and the slightest breeze would see her shatter.

Lexa pulled her face away from his sternum, still keeping her arms tightly wrapped around his middle, afraid that if she relented in her grip for even the slightest of moments that he’d disappear. She looked up at him, eyes puffy and red, tear tracks streaked down her face, “Why can’t I feel her?”

Her question was a whisper on the wind, more of a whine than vocalized words. She was terrified that if it were actually heard the answer would break her. “Why can’t I feel her though the pack bond - our bound? What- what if Nia-”

“No Lexi stop right there. Clarke’s fin- Clarke’s alive, I know it. That girl is a stubborn pain in the ass, the likes of Nia won’t be able to beat her.” His eyes soften further, like a baby animal. His strong hands move to cup her face with the utmost tenderness, forcing her gaze to meet his, forcing her to hear what he’s saying.

“We’ll find Clarke, I can’t promise in what state.” He paused weighing his words, “But we’ll find her alive Lex. They’re likely using a suppressant to both weaken her and prevent her from contacting anyone through the bond.”

Lexa nodded her head as much as possible with her big brother's hands trapping her face, “Thank you, Gustus.”

His answering smile was loving, that of a proud father, “Seingeda daunde ogeda.” *Family above all.*

//

Nia’s cool and collected facade was waning, Clarke’s defiance finally getting to her, making her temper flare. It had been days and the Blonde was still yet to break, Nia had never seen such loyalty and strength from one so young. The longest she’d ever had to torture someone to get what she wanted had been a day at most, of course, once she’d gotten what she wanted she didn’t stop; it was all just too much fun.

But this one, she was different, even now, with her face so badly broken and swollen that she couldn’t see - that she could barely breath - the look of defiance was like a flame burning in the dead of a starless night, blinding but mesmerizing.

Nia crouched down in front of the girl, pulling at her hair so that she’d look her in the eye. S tight smirk pulled its way onto Clarke’s face, and though it caused her pain, the answering snarl on Nia’s face was worth it. Nia’s eyes grew into shards of ice piercing her, “WHAT ARE YOU SMIRKING AT GIRL?!” she growled, her wolf threatening to break through, her control was slipping further.

“You.” Clarke rasped out with the smallest of chuckles, sending her into a small coughing fit. Once her coughing ceased and she got her breathing back under control Clarke continued. “You’re meant to be breaking me, but instead it is I who is breaking you.”

Nia saw red at the insolent girl's comments, how dare she insinuate - no, blatantly state - that she was in any way getting to the Ice Nation Queen. Nia struck Clarke against the side of the face, sending her form back into the poll that kept her tethered in the tent. Though it wasn't far for her body travel the impact caused Clarke’s already broken body immense pain.

But Nia didn’t stop there, her hands had elongated, her nails grown sharp, she was losing her control of her wolf and it was slipping through. She clawed at Clarke, ripping her flesh and causing sprays of crimson to paint the tent around them and the floor beneath Clarke.

When Nia was done she straightened herself, her breathing heavy and ragged. She breathed, her nostrils flaring, as she tried to return it to a more calm pace. But her wolves frenzy only intensified when her nostrils filled with the sweet metallic crimson storm Clarke's beating had ensued.

“You will learn your place.” She grunted out before leaving the tent and Clarke’s limp form behind.

//

As the days past Lexa grew more and more erratic, her wolf becoming harder and harder to deny. There had been no word from the numerous scouts Lexa had sent after the ex-queen and her followers; Nia and her guards were gone. Vanished. They had separated from the pack, no one could feel them anymore, they’d exiled themselves and created their own pack, essentially evaporating into thin air.

They hadn’t even left a scent trail, Nia had to have been planning this for some time to have thought of such extravagance to cover her tracks. Even Lexa’s best trackers and hunters couldn’t pick up a scent. With how well executed their plan was, Lexa couldn’t help but wonder if someone on the inside hadn’t been feeding Nia information. Her first thought was of Roan - he was her son after all and playing a double agent for them, but what if he was in fact actually playing them for Nia’s benefit? No. Lexa thought Roan was good, and true to his word. Besides, he despised his mother, he’d never help her over Lexa, his friend, and once possible mate.

Lexa tried to shake herself out of this mindset, she needed to trust her wolves now more than ever, and she did. If she really wanted to her Heda alpha ability would allow her to command them to reveal their thoughts to her, but there was no need. She could feel her wolves internet - Trikru wolves more than any other because they were her blood - but she knew, all the wolves of the other Clans were loyal to her, it was only Azgeda that she ever felt unease, mistrust, and uncertainty around.

If it was one thing Lexa was sure of, it wasn’t one of her wolves that had betrayed her… but it was someone.

Lexa sighed, this train of thought doing nothing for her darkening mood. She needed to think of her people, she needed to be the leader they deserved. She needed to get her shit together. She needed to get Clarke back. And that meant that she needed to let go of the wolves that had left, as a leader Lexa needs to care about her people - her pack - but she needed to let go of the members of her Coalition - members of her pack - that had deserted and betrayed her, and in all honesty she didn’t care about them anymore, they’d made their beds; both she and them needed to accept what that meant.

If they were loyal to Nia - a murderous, traitorous, backstabbing, power hungry wolf - then Lexa bid them good riddance, they didn’t have the morals of people she wanted in her pack.

Despite this, Lexa didn’t like unnecessary killing - especially of their own kind. She prayed they were smart enough to listen to their self-preservation instincts when she comes for Nia. When she comes for Clarke. Because anyone that stands in her way is going to die, she would spare no one involved in taking Clarke or protecting Nia.

Clarke was one of her people, Clarke was her everything. She’d give her life and everything she is if it meant she could see Clarke’s smile once more, see her beautiful electric blue orbs that transfixed her; if it meant Clarke could live. For that, she’d give herself over to the dark embrace of death.

As Lexa continued to pace back and forth in her throne room her advisors; Gustus, Indra, and Anya were all present, but not Titus. Lexa hadn’t seen him in a few days, she wondered where the sullen man had sulked off to. Before her thoughts turned back to her missing mate.

Her pacing increased the more her thoughts wandered to the Blonde from the sky and what Nia must be doing to her, it got so bad that Anya growled low and playful, trying to lighten her Alpha’s mood saying, “I don’t think Clarke will appreciate coming back to fall into the hole you’re wearing into the floor.”  
Lexa stopped her movement, freezing at the mention of her mate's name. Her eyes flying to Anya, hope radiating from her gaze; pure unadulterated hope that Clarke would come back, even if it was to yell at her for wearing a hole in the floor.

Lexa tried to think of something to say, some way to thank her friends - her family - for being with her, even now when all she wanted to do was tear them apart for convincing her the best thing to do for Clarke was to stay here and wait for information on her whereabouts. Not to just run off half cocked and enraged.

Lexa’s mouth opened and closed, nothing coming out. She’d just formulated something to say to them when Roan bursts into the room, chest heaving, “I know where they’re keeping Clarke.”

//

Clarke didn’t know if she was alive or dead at this point. Nia had increased the torture to such an extent that she’d become so desensitized and numb to the pain she didn’t even register it anymore. She thought maybe it was a sign that she was dying, and as much as she hated it, she was relieved by the prospect.

Don’t be mistaken, Clarke, she didn’t want to die. But if the alternative was her being used as emotional manipulation in Nia’s war against Lexa and her friends - her family - then Clarke would happily sacrifice herself. She knew the consequences that the death of a true mate could cause, but she knew that Lexa was strong, that she’d be that one in a million, that she’d live on… she just had to.

The corners of her limited vision began to become unfocused and hazy at the edges, her body was warning her that she was going to pass out. It didn’t surprise her. Between the near constant beatings, the bare minimal food and water that would allow her to remain on the brink of starvation and dehydration, and the lack of sleep; Clarke was astonished her body hadn’t shut down completely yet.

The pull of unconsciousness, both welcoming and fighting. It's gentle tug didn’t feel the same as it often did these past days, when exhaustion pulled her body down to try and give her time to heal. No, this time it felt different. It felt like the end. If Clarke allowed herself to succumb to this sleep she feared she’d never awaken again. She’d never be able to do so many things. She’d never get a chance to fix things with her mother, to tell her how sorry she was, how much she loved her. She’d never see Lexa’s heavenly hypnotizing green gaze following her every move - even when she thought Clarke wasn’t looking - she’d never see her easy relaxed smile, that shone only for her, never feel the sweet caress of her breath on her neck again. She’d never get the chance to have a family of her own with Lexa. So she fought it.

Clarke fought the gentle intoxicating pull of release that letting go offered her, she fought for her people, and the damage that Nia would cause if she were to die; she fought hardest for selfish reasons, fighting for all the things she had yet to do, and the people she had yet to meet.

Clarke pressed the nails of her left hand into the burnt flesh on her thigh where one of Nia’s goons had stuck a burning hot poker and burrowed into her flesh. She let the pain awaken her, light her fire once more and keep her alive.

Clarke’s eyes grew bright with the range of her wolf, and her will to stay alive.

The tent entrance opened, two hulking figures came in dragging a slumped figure along with them. Clarke snarled at the men, her eyes blazing, illuminating her contorted features in the most menacing of ways. The two men ignored her for the most part, tossing the slumped figure down in the corner of the tent, giving Clarke a wide berth for fear of what the feral looking wolf would do. They chained the figure to the same poll as Clarke. Once they left, Clarke growling and snarling as they made their exit, she studied the chained body next to hers; the poor soul who no doubt shared a similar fate to her own. She just hoped that they ended this person's life quickly and didn’t make her suffer as they’d made Clarke.

That was until Clarke took a closer look at who the unconscious woman was. She couldn’t smell her scent as her nose had been broken repeatedly and hadn’t healed, but when she focused on the woman's features, even covered in a film of grime and blood there was no mistaking who it was. Anya had come for her. Anya had come for her and had been captured. Clarke’s mind ran rampant if Anya was here then Lexa would be with her, but they hadn’t brought her into the tent, they hadn’t even mentioned her. What if Nia had Lexa?

Clarke had to wake Anya up, she had to know what happened to Lexa.

//

Clarke moved frantically over to Anya’s side, listening for her heartbeat, it was still there and strong, her breathing that of someone in sleep. Clarke sighed with relief she’d just been knocked out. Now Clarke had to figure out a way to wake the muck covered woman up. She slapped her a couple times to no avail - though she did manage to draw a deep rumbling growl from the woman's chest. Next, she searched for something that could shock the Beta awake.

Her tired eyes scanned the dimly lit tent, her gaze falling on the small pitcher of water she’d been given. She’d refused to drink it after the last one that had had more of the drug that stopped her from contacting Lexa or the pack, leaving it sitting there still full.

Clarke scurried over to retrieve the water before moving just as swiftly back to Anya’s side cradling her head in her lap. However, the Alpha hesitated in pouring the icy water on her face. What if they hadn’t drugged Anya and she could still contact the pack through the bond but this made her incapable of doing so? What if by forcibly waking her up Clarke destroyed any chance they had of being rescued - of Lexa being rescued?

No, Nia wouldn’t be so stupid. She’d have already had Anya drugged with the suppressant, and even if she hadn’t it’s not like Clarke was going to make Anya drink the liquid, just use it to wake the other wolf up. Besides, it’s not like Clarke had a choice, not if Lexa was in danger.

Clarke took a deep breath, “Here goes nothing.” dumping the pitcher of ice water in the woman's face.

Anya awoke with a sharp gasp, jerking upright, growling as she did so. “Ayna, calm down. It’s Clarke.” Clarke, though weary with fatigue managed to command, power behind her words silencing the Beta’s growls.

Anya blinked in the low lighting, trying to regain her bearings, “Clarke?”

The blonde gave a throaty laugh, “Yeah.”

“Jesus, what has Nia done to you? I’m going to kill her, and if I don’t Lexa sure as hell will.”

“Where is Lexa? Did she come with you? Was she captured too? Is she-”

“Calm down Clarke, she wasn’t captured.”

Clarke let out a sigh of relief, she was safe, her mate was safe.

“She’s on her way here with an army. Roan and I snuck off ahead of them to try and get you out before all hell broke lose.”

“You and Roan?”

“Yeah me and Roan, he was the one who figured out where his mother had taken you.”

“Where’s Roan now Anya?”

Anya gave her a sad smile, “We made it into the camp, but as we approached the tent they sniffed us out, I convinced Roan to knock me out and act like he’d caught me, Nia still thinks he’s on her side - she’s the one that told him where you were - I told him to say that I tracked him and he caught me.”

“So he’s ok?”

Anya’s silent for a moment, concentrating - trying to contact Roan. Clarke’s about to tell her that it won’t work because of the suppressants Nia had given them when Anya speaks. “He’s fine, he’ll be here to release us in a moment.”

Clarke hugs Anya barely able to contain her joy at the prospect of being rescued, Anya allowed the hug from the clearly broken girl for a moment before shrugging her off. As happy as she was at the prospect of rescue she couldn’t help the voice in the back of her head wondering why Nia wouldn’t drug Anya. Did she not think Anya would wake up so soon? Clarke didn’t know, but she had a bad feeling about this.

//

“I know where they’re keeping Clarke.” Roan breathed out trying to catch his breath, wheezing between his words. Lexa rounded on him, moving slightly before holding herself back, reminding herself that he’s wasn’t the enemy. She waited not so patiently for him to get his breath back, clutching the knife at her waist and twirling it around and around, trying to stop herself from shouting at him to speak.

“They’re two days run from Polis and one from Azgeda territory.” Roan disclosed. Somewhat more hesitantly he began speaking again, measuring his words carefully, he knew the implications they’d hold. “There’s… There’s something else. They haven’t moved since taking Clarke.”

Lexa’s eyes had begun glowing her beautiful mix of forest and grass green, setting the wolves around her on edge. They hadn’t advanced into the safety Azgeda territory, they’d remained in the same place for the last almost three days. Lexa knew what that meant. And it sent red hot rage searing through her entire body. Nia was going to pay dearly, Lexa was going to make her suffer, make her death slow and painful for what she’d undoubtedly put her mate through… that’s if she was still - no Lexa scolded herself, Clarke was alive. Lexa would know if she wasn’t. She’d know - she’d feel it - she reasoned. Clarke was alive and waiting for her to come and get her.

Lexa snapped to attention at the thought, she had to go get Clarke, now. “Indra rally our Tikru troops, assign one of our top generals to each of the other Clans to coordinate our movements. Gustus, assemble the ambassadors for the Clans and inform them of what’s going on. Anya, bring me Raven, Octavia, and Lincoln, I need to speak with them. Roan, you go with Gustus, prepare the Clans for what they’re getting into, tell them everything you know regarding numbers, strength weaknesses. We want to avoid as many casualties as we can.”

“Sha Heda.” They all responded, moved with haste complete their assigned tasks. They all knew that they needed to begin their advance on the Azgeda force as soon as possible.

As her faithful companions moved about their tasks Lexa stood out on her balcony, looking over her people, the people that she had sworn to protect with her life, the people she’d sworn to lead, to guide with love and grace. She would do this. She would protect them from Nia’s power crazy rampage, she’d get Clarke back and together they’d bring about an age of peace for their people. Together.

//

Raven and Octavia had been on edge since it had been announced that Clarke was missing. Raven seethed about how it was all Lexa’s fault, that she should have protected Clarke. Octavia tried to calm her friend, but Raven just became more enraged with each attempt. Octavia’s own concern for her friend placated by the presence of Lincoln. He calmed her. Set something inside her at ease. She couldn’t pinpoint what it was, but she knew something that shocked her deeply, she didn’t want to be without him, without his presence by her side.

Octavia’s calm exterior seemed to spark Raven’s anger further. Raven now directing all of her worry and concern for Clarke at Octavia in the form of rage, “You don’t even care, do you? Our friend - OUR SISTER - is out there right now, god knows where, probably-” Raven’s words got lodged in her throat, choked down by emotion. When she spoke again her words were more of a sob than the rage-filled slings of before, “hurt and needing us, and you’re here, cuddling up to one of them.”

Octavia stood up, moving to stand in front of her friend. Had it been anyone else Raven would have thought they’d slap her, she even thought that Octavia might in that moment; her anger filled words enveloping the room. But Octavia didn’t slap her, she knew Raven was concerned for Clarke, that she was just misdirecting her anger, distorting her concern into anger to cope, to stay aloft when all she felt like doing was drowning because Clarke, their anchor was gone.

Octavia enveloped her older sister in a bone crushing hug, grounding her, grounding them both. She held Raven up as she fell to pieces, finally feeling her emotions, her body being racked with deep sobs. “I’m so sorry O, I should have said any of that,” she mumbled into the girl's chest as she sucked in each breath trying to calm her shaking body.

“Shhh, I know Ray.”

Anya walked into the room then, the emotion thick in the air, it hit like a brick wall. She could feel Octavia and Raven’s pain, she could smell it, and she knew then that if Clarke were to die it wouldn’t just be Lexa who felt it, who wouldn’t recover from it, these girls - and likely all of Clarke’s people, even the grounders - would be shadows of who the are now, Clarke brought out so much light in all of them, bearing the darkness so that they remained clean. She was a leader, a healer, a protector. She was so much, and yet all she wanted to do was be. And now, because of Nia, she may never get the chance.

Anya cleared her throat, alerting the humans to her presence in the room, Lincoln already having smelled her approach. Raven detached herself from Octavia’s firm protecting grip, wiping at her tear stained face as she turned to face Lexa’s second.

“Lexa want’s to speak with you all, we know where Clarke is.”

//

“Where is she? Why are you not on your way to her now?” Raven rushed into the throne room where Lexa still stood looking out to the horizon, watching the sun shift from east to west over the sky, wishing she was chasing it on her way to Clarke’s side.

Lexa turned to face the latino ball of fire, “Because I need your help to get her back.”

Raven looked confused, “Me? What can I do?” her real question “What can a human do that a wolf can’t?”

“Clarke mentioned you to be a proficient mechanic, something I myself noted when I was in your camp. Anya also informs me that you’ve been in the library reading the books from before Prime Fire.”

Raven’s cheeks heat at that, she didn’t think that anyone had known that she’d been in their library extending her already extraordinary knowledge of her chosen field. “Yes.” She said sheepishly.

“I want you to build something for me, to fight the Azgeda troops who stand with Nia, I want to limit our people's losses as much as possible.”

Raven gave a small smirk in Lexa’s direction, “I have just the thing, but I’ll need help.”

Lexa gave a swift nod, trusting the mechanic as she knew Clarke would. “My people are at your disposal Raven.”

“Thanks, but I’m going to need more than that, do you still have the radio Bell gave to Clarke?”

Lexa was confused for a moment before going to the corner table, producing the makeshift radio Raven had built for Clarke; handing it over to the mechanic.

“Thanks,” Raven grumbled before turning the radio on and calling their people to war.

//

They used the radio to inform their people of Clarke’s capture, Kane, Bellamy, Abby, and Monty (on Raven’s request) come to Polis in the Rover, arriving within the hour of their conversation ending. Raven and Monty set about making bombs and weapons to use in the upcoming fight, they knew that there was no way the Azegda bitch was going to give Clarke up alive without one hell of a fight, so that’s exactly what they were going to give her.

Bellamy and Kane had met up with Indra going over possible strategies they could use based on various scenarios that could arise based on the location and information Roan had given them. They’d decided to leave their troops at Skaikru’s base, they’d meet up with them on the way to Clarke’s location, they hadn’t wanted to leave their home unprotected while they organized their attack. Which was going to be a lot stronger with the aid of Raven and Monty’s bombs.

Bellamy went in search of the brilliant frightening pair. He needed to see Raven, to be with her before this all went down. He found them in the lower levels of Lexa’s tower, surrounded by books and various equipment that Raven had directed Monty to bring with him. Bellamy was just glad that he hadn’t had to gather it all, he didn’t know what half of the things were that she’d rattled off for Monty to bring, or why they got into an argument over whether it was better to use the remaining rocket fuel or something Bellamy couldn’t even pronounce.

Raven had grease smudged on her right cheek and, despite the situation they found themselves in, Bellamy couldn’t help but smile. She was so goddamn beautiful. Neither had noticed his appearance in the room or so he thought. Monty cleared his throat, drawing Bellamy’s attention away from his beautiful mechanic. He blushed having been caught staring, enthralled with the dark haired girl, “Ray I’m just going to go for a quick walk and check how the plan’s going.”

Raven made a noncommittal grunt in response before yelling after him “Just don’t take too long these bombs aren’t going to build themselv-” her voice faded off at the end, her russet red eyes locking with Bellamy’s dark brown amber ones.

“Bell.”

“Hey, Ray.” Bellamy moved to embrace Raven, twirling and darting around the various tools, parts, and books scattered about the room. “I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too Bell,” Raven said before crashing her smaller frame into his well-built form, clasping her arms around his back, locking him into a vice grip, holding him close to her as if she relented he would disappear as if he were a mirage. His own strong arms reciprocating her hug, enveloping her, engulfing her in the security blanket that was him, his scent, his familiar comforting form.

Raven leaned her neck up, pulling the top proportion of her body away from his while her arms still wrapped tightly around him, she leaned up on her tippy toes to close the gap, placing her lips gently against his.

Their kiss was soft, sweet, unrushed. It was the greeting of old lovers.

When they parted they rested their foreheads against one another's, “I really missed you.” Bellamy breathed. Raven smirked, a small laugh escaping her lips before she tilted her head up to look him in the eyes.

“Yeah, I could kinda tell.” She said leaning into him so she was flush against his very prominent erection. “Want me to give you a hand with that?” Raven asked, voice full of mirth and challenge.

“Oh Ms. Rayes I thought you’d never ask,” Bellamy said as he swept his hands down Ravens body, picking her up bridal style, holding her tightly in his arms as she squealed in surprise.

“Bell put me down!”

“I’d be happy to.” He said placing her on the set in the corner, “Now let me worship you.”

//

Abby had been spending time with Nyko, trading knowledge with one another, preparing for the upcoming battle and the injuries and casualties it would no doubt create. That lead to an awkward conversation between Lexa and Abby after Nyko had to inform her that the grounders (well most of them) were in fact werewolves, as well as her daughter. The revelation came when Abby was questioning why Nyko wasn’t preparing to deal with excessive bleeding and the need to perform surgery or give stitches. He’d looked at her conflict on his face, it was obvious that neither Clarke nor Lexa had told the woman - Lexa leaving it to Clarke to do, it was her secret now too, her decision to make - and he knew that there’d be a reason, but he couldn’t work with Abby questioning his every decision, nor could she properly tend to the wounded if she didn’t have all the facts. That and he was concerned that she’d faint if she saw a large injury miraculously heal.

He let out a low gruff, “Perhaps you should go speak with Lexa.”

“What, why?” Her tone was defensive, she still didn’t like Lexa, she still felt as if she’d taken Clarke away and she’d never got her daughter back. But more than that, she resented Lexa, because she could have Clarke’s love so freely, she’d made Clarke come alive again… and as petty as it was, Abby had wished it were here to have brought her daughter back, not someone whom she barely knew.

Nyko sighed, resigned to the fact that it was he that had to have this conversation with the woman. “There’s something you should know about us - Grounders - about Clarke.”

He’d peaked her interest at that, she turned to face him fully now, giving him her undivided attention, “What about Clarke don’t I know.” She laughed at herself, what a question for a parent to ask. A better question would perhaps be what did she know about Clarke? She hadn’t even known her daughter was Bi.

“We’re werewolves.” He stated simply, tone serious. Abby looked at him silently for a moment before she broke out into hysterical laughter. Doubling over with the effort.

“Seriously Nyko?” She continued laughing. After a moment she’d composed herself, “Now, what actually do you need to tell me?”

Nyko remained stoic, silent, eyes portraying that he was dead serious about what he’d said.

“No, that’s - that’s not possible.”

Nyko walked around the confused woman, stepping outside of the small room they were in. She padded after him, curious as to where he was going. He kept walking for a minute or two until they were by the tree line.

“Why are we-” Abby cut herself off when Nyko began taking his shirt and pants off, “Nyko! What are you doing?”

“I’m showing you the truth.” he threw over his shoulder before giving a low grunt as his body began to ripple and contort.

Before she knew it a beautiful black wolf stood in front of her. It’s face dawned with white fur in the shape and placement of Nyko’s tattoos.

“Oh my god, it’s true.” The wolf did little more than sit there looking at her, dipping its head slightly in confirmation of her statement. “And Clarke… She’s… she’s like you?” again the same head dip. “H- How?” Abby asked, unsure if she really wanted the answer. The wolf - Nyko - gave her a look suggesting what a stupid question that was, a look that implied the sentiment of “Really?”, “Lexa.” Abby breathed. Again Nyko dipped his head in confirmation, “That’s why Clarke didn’t come back for so long, why she was… different.”

At this point Nyko knew she wasn’t speaking to him, but rather acknowledging and connecting everything that had happened, making sense of it all.

Abby’s gaze steeled and Nyko knew what was to come, “I’m going to kill her.” She stated, Nyko sighed, shifting back into his human form. Standing he grabbed his clothing and re-dressed.

“That is not your decision to make.”

“I am her mother.”

“Yes, but Clarke is an adult, a leader. If she were unhappy with what happened she would have already dealt with Lexa.”

Abby remained silent locking eyes with the stoic man, she knew he was right. But that didn’t mean she wasn’t going to give Lexa a piece of her mind anyway. Maybe then they could move on.

//

Octavia had been spending the downtime sparing with Lincoln practicing her technique for the upcoming battle, much to his displeasure. “I’m not going to just sit here and wait for you to bring my best friend - MY FAMILY - home. I’m not going to cower in fear for my own safety, I’m going to fight for her like she would and has for me.”

Lincoln sighed, “Heda sis au Ai. Ai hod yu in, Yu stubborn, yuj, gona hayon.” *Heda help me. I love you, you stubborn, strong, warrior goddess.* her growled in defeat.

Octavia’s breath hitched, “You love me?”

Lincoln’s head snapped up to meet her eyes. She could see the storm in his, the struggle of his inner self before he replied. “Yes. Octavia of the Sky People, I love you. With everything that I am and everything that I have.”

“I love you too Lincoln.”

The two embraced, lips locking in a desperate need to express their love in a way mere words could not. It may not have been the ideal time for the confession the two had been hiding to burst free, but it was the right time. For who knew what the future held. How much time we all have left. Isn’t it better to live as fully as you can than regret never saying or doing something just because you thought it was too soon.

At least now if anything happened in this war they’d both know that they loved and were loved in return.

//

After Roan had done as Lexa asked, giving all the information he could to prepare Indra and the others for the attack he’d slinked off to the woods. He hadn’t told Lexa of his plan, she’d deem it reckless and dangerous, commanding him not to proceed with it, but he had to. He planned to scout ahead of Lexa’s impressive force, try and get Clarke clear of the area before they even arrived, saving her from getting caught in any possible crossfire. And getting her away from his mother and her sadistic grasp as soon as possible.

However, though it appeared Lexa trusted him, others, it seemed, did not. “Anya, why are you following me?” he said, stopping his forward movement, his back to her.

Anya stepped out of the shadows she’d been lurking in, “Because you’re about to do something incredibly stupid.”

“You’re not going to stop me , nya.” He said, rounding on her, “I’m going to do this. I’m not going to let Clarke suffer any longer because of my mother.”

A knowing smile spread across Anya’s usually hardened features, “And who said I’m here to stop you, Prince?” She asked, a playful glint in her voice.

“You’re… You’re not going to try and stop me?” He asked unsure, confused as to her purpose in following him.

“Nope.” she said walking past him, “I’m coming with you.”

“Anya-”

“Someone's got to make sure you don’t screw it up,” she added playfully. When Roan looked at her doubtful she continued. “I’m doing this for Lexa, you know what’ll happen if she dies.”

Roan sighed, utterly defeated at the prospect, “Yes, I do.”

Anya eyed him for a second, something flashing in her dark gaze before she became flippant once more, “Besides, someone's got to protect your royal ass.”

Roan scoffed, “Anytime Anya, I can take you any time anywhere.”

Anya moved so that there were mere inches between the two’s faces, “Is that a promise?” She asked, raising a sculpted eyebrow. Roan swallowed the sudden lump in his throat. Shaking his head slightly in mock exasperation.

“We should go.”

Anya extended her arm in front of them, “Lead the way.”

//

They’d pushed themselves hard on the journey to where Nia and Clarke awaited. Barely stopping and running as fast as their legs would carry them. They’d left Polis around mid-morning the day prior and were on the outskirts of Nia’s camp just before dawn the next morning. They scouted out the set up as they regained their breath from the exertion they’d put their bodies through.

They’d climbed up the slope the overlooked the camp, staying downwind the entire time and sticking to the shadows, their noises always in the air sniffing for anyone on watch. They’d found a spot that had a clear view of the camp but was shrouded in darkness, their bodies hidden from the slowly brightening sky by the bush line.

“There.” Roan said pointing to a fair sized tent just off the middle of the camps set up, “That’s where Nia will be keeping her.”

Anya scoffed, “No it won’t be, it’s too obvious.”

Roan rolled his eyes, “You don’t know my mother, that’s where she’ll be keeping Clarke. See how the majority of the tents are placed facing towards Polis? That’s for protection, the tents behind it are decoy and supply tents.”

“How do you-”

“My mother remember.”

“Right.”

“That tent is the most protected one, it’s not too big to draw attention to it, but big enough to… you know.”

“Have enough room to torture someone?”

“Yeah.”

“Well? Come on then, the suns going to be up soon, it’s now or never.” Roan nodded in agreement, they didn’t have much time before the cover of darkness would no longer protect them.


	14. The Final Blow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final battle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, you'll a morbid bunch aren't you? Haha, you voted and you have now received. It may not be what many of you want or expected but I'd just like to note that, yes, these characters are based off the ones from the show but they're not carbon copies, they haven't done all the things that their counterparts have (though I didn't exactly make clear what has and hasn't happened in this story and that's because I didn't really expect it to be anything so thanks for reading). 
> 
> Sorry, the update took almost six weeks, Uni's kicking my ass a little haha but you'll probably only have four weeks to wait if that for the final chapter (I have exams so I have to focus on those sorry!) 
> 
> As always I hope you enjoy, any thoughts let me know. Come yell at me on Tumblr https://night-bloom6.tumblr.com/ :)

Roan and Anya slink down from their perch atop the hill overlooking the Ice Queens camp, sticking to the shadows as they made their way towards the tent Roan had indicated as the one that would be housing Clarke.

 

Their progress was hindered by the rising sun, swollen pits of darkness now turned to light, brightening shades of grey to white creeping in on them as they made their way towards their target. Their movements now barely concealed as the last lingerings on the night as filtered away into a blood twilight. On top of this, it seemed that everyone in the whole damn camp had decided that now was the perfect time to start the day anew. Each tent they passed the rustlings of its inhabitants awakening could be heard, each time their bodies tensed, their breath stilled, and they waited. Waited to be discovered, bodies ready to defend against anyone who got in their way on their quest to find and free Clarke… before it was too late.

 

But it never came, they were never discovered by the inhabitants of the tents they used to conceal themselves. But they were running out of time. They needed to hurry or else they’d have no chance at getting Clarke out of here undetected, or alive.

 

Balancing on the precipice of time they became sloppy in their movements, hurried, and this was to be their downfall. They’d just reached a small bank incline that rested 20 or so meters away from the tent that they were presumably keeping Clarke in. Both Roan and Anya channelled their hearing to listen for any signs of life coming from the tent, they could hear a single heartbeat, weak and fading coming from the direction of the tent. They shared a knowing look, it was Clarke, but she wasn’t fairing well, a wolves heartbeat shouldn’t be that low, they launched from their hiding spot, not stopping to scent the area or listen for signs of others in the general area. 

 

Mere meters from the tent they heard the shouting of voice and the sound of feet bounding towards them at an alarming rate. They’d been found. They were going to be captured and die, Clarke most likely along with them.

 

They scurried away from the tent entrance, lunging back behind the small bank that’d offer them a few moments reprieve to come up with something to save themselves and Clarke.

 

“Knock me out,” Anya whispered harshly, rounding on Roan, eyes steeled. 

 

“What?!?” He hissed back, not understanding where Anya was going with this.

 

“Knock me out Roan, you can say that I followed you, you caught me and knocked me out.”

 

“They’ll never believe that.”

 

“Why not?” Anya opposed

 

“Because, how am I to explain that I didn’t attack you until we were so far into the camp, or that no one saw me enter?”

 

Anya was becoming frustrated now, the guards were getting closer and they really didn’t have the luxury of time to discuss this, “Say that you didn’t want to have to carry me far I woke up, say that you didn’t want me sneaking off to do god knows what so you stuck to the shadows to lure my in to take me out.” she rasped didactically, patience waning. 

 

Roan was about to protest further when Anya’s composure finally crumbled, and she snapped. “We don’t have time to debate this Roan! This is our best chance at saving both Clarke and ourselves. Once I’ve been placed with her you’ll come get us then we’ll make a run for it. But for now, just hit me and make it good.”

 

Anya could see hesitation simmer in Roan's eyes before swiftly transforming into remorse, “I’m sorry.” he whispered, Anya offered him a weak smile, knowing it wasn’t going to be of much comfort before everything went black.

 

//

 

“What is the meaning of this!?” Nia seethed, seeing guards surrounding her son and a limp female form. As she took in the scene her trademark smirk of ice and cruelty graced her lips. “Well what do we have here?” her anger had now turned to glee as she examined the woman at her son's feet. It was her scent that hit her first, it was that of the commander's mentor and second in command Anya. She had dried blood on her temple - presumably where Roan had struck her - and her features were smeared with mud and dirt for where she lay crumpled and lax on the clearings ground.

 

“Mother.” Roan’s deep baritone voice sliced through the relative quiet that had fallen over the group, not even the early morning birds dare sung their songs for fear of his mother's unrelenting wrath. “I noticed her tracking me when I left Polis to come here-”

 

“Obviously you didn’t have the commanders trust as much as you thought.” she chastised, voice venomous. 

 

Roan ignored her interjection, Nia was cruel and belittling, by this point in his life Roan was used to his mother's hateful words, and so just continued speaking as though she hadn’t. Lacing his voice with hate and malice, warning any who dare question his story.

 

“I allowed her to follow me, sticking to the shadows so that she wouldn’t be scared off by your guards and find a new way into the camp. Then, when we were close enough in that I didn’t fear her waking if I were to knock her out I struck.” He paused, raising an eyebrow, challenging anyone was to question him before continuing, “The rest you can see for yourself.” 

 

Nia’s face was impassive, blank, so when she moved Roan didn’t know whether it was to embrace him or to hit him - and to be frank he didn’t know which option frightened him more. But she did neither, she moved and kicked a knocked out Anya swiftly in the ribs and he heard a crack. He had to school his features before he’d give away any sentiment of caring for the pain Anya will be in when she wakes. Though she’d be fully healed by then… If Nia didn’t have her way with her and he could get them all out that is.

 

“You’ve done well my son, not only do we now have Lexa’s bitch mate, but we also have her second! She will crumble before our feet, begging before  _ her _ people for the sweet comfort and release of death.” Nia’s eyes were alight with madness her features twisting and contorting with disdain, disgust, glee, and murder.

 

Roan remained impassive to his mother speech, simply acknowledging her words with the dip of his head. Her words made him sick, she’d become unhinged, and if he ever had any reservations about their plan to end her they were now definitely wiped from his mind.

 

One of the guards disappeared, returning shortly after with a syringe filled with a vile looking yellow liquid, the sight of it made his stomach roll, he felt bile rise in his throat. He didn’t know what it was, but he knew that it was unnatural. The guard made a move to pierce Anya’s skin and deposit the liquid into her, causing god knows what to happen to her, but Nia stopped him.

 

“NO.” she growled, “Not her, I have other plans for her.” a devilish smile playing on her features, this new addition to her collection of people Lexa cared about allowed a new plan to develop in her head. A plan that will crush Lexa all the more.

 

“Put her with Lexa’s other bitch, we have much to do,” Nia commands before turning to leave the guards to deal with an unconscious Anya. Roan goes to pick her up, unable to stand any of these traitors touching her, but Nia throws words to him over her shoulder, bidding him to follow her and leave the guards to deal with Anya. He has no choice but to obey if only to maintain their cover.

 

//

 

Nia leads them back to her tent, a throne of skulls at its centre. Roan has to stop himself from scoffing, she says she hates Lexa, and yet here she is trying - and failing - to imitate her. Roan stands before the throne as his mother sits, hands clasped behind his back, awaiting her to explain why she brought him here. 

 

Nia sits there staring at him, cold calculating dead eyes studying him, taking him in. Her face rested in her hand that makes her gaze appear even more specatory. The silence between them grows thick, neither willing to cave and break it first. Both trying to assert their dominance through silence. But Nia’s never really had the best patience. Her eyes transform in anger as she snaps first. She sighs exaggeratory, as to try and elude that she hadn’t just lost their display of dominance, when in fact she had. 

 

“My son, Prince of Azgeda, you have done well.” Nia throws in his title, the same one she’d previously ripped from him in anger at some infection she’d perceived he’d done. However to the people he was their prince, no matter what his mother demanded.

 

“Thank you mother.” The words taste vile leaving his mouth. It’s ironic, for most of his life all he wanted was his mother's approval - her acceptance - and now the mere thought makes him sick to his stomach, makes his wolf prickle and snarl. He now understands what it would mean, what he’d have to do, what it’d make him garner her approval. He no longer wants it. That isn’t who he wants to be.

 

He clears his throat, “If there is nothing further-”

 

“You may leave, celebrate our victories with our troops, for soon blood will be shed.”

 

Roan bows before exiting his mother's tent, bidding that if blood be spilt, it is none but hers.

 

//

 

Anya’s gaze remained penetrative fixed on the unmoving form of Titus, Clarke had grown accustomed to his stink, her noise filtering it out after the first couple of days - that is when it wasn’t broken. But now, with her barely more than human healing capability, all she could smell - if anything - was blood. But Anya's ability to smell was still perfectly intact, and between Titus's rotting corpse and Clarke's bloodied and dirt cracked body that hadn’t been bathed in a week, her senses were being overwhelmed and she was drowning in their scents.

 

Her anger for Titus and his actions allowed her to focus on something other than the smells that permeated the tent, festering in their little hell, growing worse along with their situation. As Anya looked at Titus she couldn’t help the smug satisfaction that washed over her as she thought that he got all that he deserved. For working with Nia, for betraying Lexa, betraying them all. But what more could she really expect, he was human - more than that, he was a human without a family - he was boundless, not like wolves.

 

Still, the betrayal hurt, they were all family, wolf or not. Anya scoffed, the fool would have somehow thought that his actions would protect Lexa and that whatever deal he had made with Nia for Clarke’s capture would be upheld. He should have known better.

 

Anya’s gaze only shifted from his decomposing form when Clarke slump onto the ground. Her body finally succumbing to the abuse it had suffered these past days, finally collapsing into its fatigue. Scurrying over to the blonde Anya cradled her head in her lap, stroking her matted hair from her face and running a hand gently across a battered cheek. The moment was gentle and intimate. Something Anya had only ever been with a young Lexa, becoming more than her mentor, becoming a friend, a confidant, family. 

 

She’d been there for her when she mourned for the family she’d been taken from to be trained as Heda. She’d been hard on her when training, but she had quickly developed an attachment to the young warrior in her charge. Yes, it had been her job to ensure Lexa’s survival of her conclave and her successful ascension to Heda, but it had been more than a duty to Anya. She loved Lexa. The scrawny girl with thick wild brown locks that curled and tangled in themselves creating a rats nest, and eyes too big and hopeful for what the world had planned for her. She’d grown to love the girl's predisposition and unwavering desire for peace; despite that, the world seemingly had only death and war planned for her. She never relented in her belief that people could be better, could want better, if only given the chance.

 

Anya thought of that girl when she cradled Clarke’s broken form in her embrace. She thought of the girl who only wanted peace and love. Throught of all the sadness life had dealt her way and how she’d never broken underneath it. And this set Anya’s resolve. She’d protect Clarke until her last breath if it meant keeping the light that is Lexa alive in the world.

 

Anya moved her lips so that they hovered just above Clark's ear, she could smell death on her. It hovered over her and clung to her form, growing stronger with each passing second. Death was trying to claim her, to bring Wanheda back home. But it was Clarke who Commanded death, not the other way round, and Anya would not let it take her. Not yet.

 

“Clarke.” she cooed, when she made no acknowledgement of Anya saying her name panic etched its way into Anya's voice when she spoke again, louder this time, trying to coerce Clarke backing consciousness, and if that didn’t work, scare her back into it.

 

“CLARKE.” Anya didn’t yell, she knew that would only hurt Clarke further, but her voice was strong, set and laced with all the power and command she could force into it, “You  _ HAVE _ to wake up.” She knew Clarke was stronger than her, but in her weakened state, it seemed that Anya's commands were enough to get her to respond.

 

Clarke's eyes fluttered open, delayed and sluggish. Anya knew that Clarke didn’t have much fight left in her, but she also knew that Clarke was giving it all she had to hold on, to fight the pull of death for as long as she could. If only for Lexa.

 

When Clarke spoke her voice was barely above a whisper, her words rasped out, and if Anya hadn’t of been so close she doesn’t think she’d have heard what she said, “I’m here, I’m still here.” 

 

The words were both a reassurance to Anya and a confirmation to herself, a promise that she’d fight for as long as she could.

 

//

 

Roan arrives quickly after the exchange, Anya calling to him, telling him of Clarke's condition. The first thing Roan notices when he steps into the tent is the putrid scent, he screws his nose, unable to comprehend how Anya has been able to stand it for so long. His eyes go in search of the source as his noise tried to focus on anything else. The first thing he notices is a body pushed into the corner of the tent that the strongest scent appears to be radiating from. Though the form compromised and altered by decomposition Roan could still tell that it was that of Titus, Lexa’s flamekeeper.

 

A monstrous rage swelled in his chest, pulling a tremendous growl from his lips. How could a man that claimed to love Lexa do something that hurt her so? How could a man tasked with caring for Heda do something that would kill her? How could a man, seemingly so smart, trust a word that left his mother's lips, trust the promises that she offered?

 

It was only when his noise focused on the other pungent scent in the tent, that his eyes left the traitor and focused on Anya cradling what seemed to be a child in her grasp. The sight broke his heart. Clarke, the strong, bright, newly turned Alpha he’d meet in Polis now reduced to this. And by his mother's hand. She was curled around Anya, using her as an anchor to cling to life. Her hair, matted in clumps by blood and dirt, body littered with cuts and bruises that hadn’t yet healed, her body atrophying, streaked in blood and the stink of death. Her eyes were perhaps the saddest sight of all, once so bright and lit with light were now dull and barely there, sunken into her face. The blue in her eyes no longer glowed as if light by the sun, they were dull. She was barely there, barely alive. She looked so small, weak, and broken.

 

Roan's approach is hurried, he knows that they don’t have much time. He moves to unchain Clarke first, there's a moment of quiet reprieve as he works at removing the chains around her ankle. Before he can move on to begin work on removing Anya’s chains he’s down on the ground, curled over in pain, hand flying to his abdomen. Trying to stop the burning ripping feeling that courses through him.

 

He turns eyes widen when he sees his mother standing over him, knife in hand, dripping with crimson with his blood. Before he knows it or can react Clarke lunges at the woman. Her small and broken from tackling the tall woman to the ground, eyes wide. Clarke straddles Nia, pinning her with all her weight and strength, raising her fists, she hammers down on Nia’s face with the last of her strength, trying desperately to knock the woman unconscious.  

 

Nia’s hands fly around wildly searching for the discarded dagger that flew from her grasp when Clarke tackled her. Both women's struggles increase, both wanting to end the other. Clarke never relents from her assault, not even when she feels a sharp pain between her third and fourth ribs, not even as the little life she had left slowly seeps from her being. 

 

She continues her assault on the queen, her fists falling more from gravity than from any force she exerts. Her hits landing softer and softer until finally her fists no longer rise up to fall back down. Her hands unclench, falling limply against Nia’s chest where they’d last landed. And finally Clarke’s body can no longer fight the fatigue, she collapses against the queen, dagger still protruding from her side. 

 

When Nia tears the dagger from her flesh Clarke makes a small whimper, but nothing more and only for a second before it’s gone. Just like her.

 

Nia rolls Clarke’s immobile form off of her, rising to her full height. Looking down at the static body of the bloodied blond in the dirt, crimson soaking the earth. Nia listens for a moment, as she knows both Anya and her son will be, honing her senses onto the blonde, listening to her heart struggle to beat, her breathing short and shallow; until, finally, she hears exactly what she wanted. Nothing.

 

“What have you done?!?” Roan roars, murderous venom seeping from his words, before his body collapses back to the ground, his own heartbeat growing fainter. Anya moves to his side, pressing on his wound, trying to control the bleeding as best she can.

 

Nia chuckles, wicked and menacing. Anya’s cold eyes turned to her, range and promise lacing her gaze and voice, “Lexa knows what you’ve done Nia, she’s coming for you.”

 

Nia’s form his racked with laughter, her voice booming through the tent, gleeful joy in her words as she chuckles at the statement, “Oh, my dear.” She says earning a look of pure death from the fierce warrior, she smirks before rounding on Anya with the butt of the knife, knocking her out. “I’m counting on it.”

 

//

 

“NO.” 

 

“Lexa she saw it-”

 

“No.”

 

“Lexa…”

 

“No, Clarke’s not dead. I didn’t feel it. Anya must be mistaken.”

 

Gustus sighs before going to his sister's side, he knows nothing he can do will or could comfort her, but he has to try. He stands just beside her, letting his body heat radiate and pheromones out, trying to calm her, let her know that he’s there and she’s not alone. 

 

When Lexa speaks again it choked and barely above a whisper, “... She can’t be.”

 

Gustus places his hand on her shoulder, anchoring her to the world, anchoring her thoughts to the present; before turning her to face him. “Lexa… I cannot know what has become of Clarke, all I know is what Anya saw and heard. She heard her heart stop, her life end.” Lexa gives him a defiant look, about to argue with him, eyes welling with tears she will not let fall. He raises her hands silencing her arguments before they can begin. “But, what I do believe - what I know - to be true, is that you and she are true mates…” He pauses, his own voice wobbling at the implications of what Clarke’s death would mean for his sister. “And you would know… so though I believe what Anya saw, I also believe you, Ai wich in em. Em’s yui, em’ll kom daun gon osir.” *I believe in her. She’s strong, she’ll return to us.*

Lexa gives him a stiff nod. She has to control her emotions. She’s torn between believing Anya and following her gut instinct, for she fears how her heart might break if she dares to even hope that Anya is wrong. But she must be. Lexa, she’d know if Clarke was really dead. She’d know. And so, she lets the seedlings of hope take root in her soul, she lets her hold her in its sweet embrace, and she lets it drive her as she readies her troops for battle.

 

//

 

Anya wakes some time later with a pounding in her head and a stinging in her neck. Her hand flies up to where the pain is emulating from, but all she finds is long dried blood.

 

“You’re fine.” A deep voice cracks out beneath her, “My-” violent hacking issues for a moment before Roan tried to speak again, this time his voice barely even a whisper in the otherwise silent tent,  “mother just injected you with a serum that inhibits our wolf abilities.” He pauses, catching his breath, “No pack communication, no wolf healing.” he says wincing as more crimson oozes out of his wound. 

 

“Hey, hey,” Anya whispers, focusing on the man cradled in her lap, not daring to look over at the slumped blonde, not trusting that’d she’d be able to keep it together enough to get them out of this mess. She may not have liked Clarke at first, but she made Lexa unbelievably happy, she was strong, she was wise, and above all stubborn to a fault - she wouldn’t take anyone's crap, she certainly hadn’t taken Anya’s, she’d stood her ground, Anya had been proud that her friend had found a mate that was her equal in so many ways, a mate that made her better.

 

And now that was gone, and it was all Anya’s fault.

 

So Anya turns her focus on the slowly dying man in her grasp, not prepared for another death to be on her shoulders, “You’re going to be ok.” Anya looks around the poorly lit tent, her eyes unable to focus as they usually would, “We just need to find something that’ll stop the bleeding.” As she speaks her eyes dart around, searching for anything that may help. 

 

Then they fall on something in the far corner. A slight glow is emulating from a small pit with a rod sticking out of it. Anya know’s why it’s there, she remembers the catalysed wounds that were scattered over Clarke’s body, they’d stabbed her with a scolding hot poking iron, torturing her until… - No, Anya shook the thoughts from her mind, now wasn't the time.

 

Despite the instrument's original purpose in the tent Anya would now use it to seal up Roan’s wound and hope that it saves him - or at least gives them enough time to escape. “Roan, I need to put you on the ground for a sec.” Roan’s reply is a weak grunt of acknowledgement. 

 

Anya slips his head carefully off her lap, laying it as gently as possible onto the ground below them before trying her hand at standing. She finds her body too weak to obey her commands, only making onto her knees before her legs refuse to comply any further. Anya sighs, “I guess that'll have to do.” She grits her teeth as she makes her way over to the corner of the tent, dragging her chain along with her.

 

She’s so transfixed on her goal that she doesn’t notice that her length of chain has run out until their a sharp digging pain into the skin at her ankle. It’s more of an annoyance than anything else. She’s so close to the poking iron, but it’s just out of reach. 

 

She tries again to stand. It takes her some time, and more attempts than she’s willing to admit, but, eventually, she manages to do something resembling standing. She knows that she has one shot at grabbing the poking iron, her body exerting immense effort just by holding her weight up. She lets out a shaky breath, this is going to hurt. 

 

She lunges for the smouldering embers that sheath the poking iron. The chain pulls taut against her leg and the poll, her body falls from the air, her forward motion ceasing. Her arms fly out, her eyes shut as she braces her body for the impact. When she lands pain radiates throughout her body, but it’s her arm that hurts the most, it feels like it is ablaze. That’s when she realises, she knocked the poking iron out of the embers and flung some into the air, landing scattered throughout the tent, scorching what lay beneath. 

 

She flicks the ember from her skin, dragging the poking iron to her chest. She had to close Roan’s wound before it lost its heat. She scrambles back to his side, cautious of falling with an object capable of killing either her or him in their current states. When she looks down at the Azgeda prince his whole body is in sweets, it’s now or never. “It’s going to hurt.” And that’s the only warning she gives before placing the flaming tip of the rod against his leaking flesh. 

 

The scent of burning and charring flesh permeates the air of the tent. Roan’s eyes, crystal blue, shoot open in an instant, fogging over in pain. He never releases more than a small whimper in response to the iron burning his flesh and scolding the wound on his abdomen close. 

 

//

Her breath caught in the crisp morning air. It stung as it chilled her lungs with every heave of her chest. The only thing that made the pain bearable was the electricity coursing through it, setting her limbs ablaze and bringing her back to life. 

 

As she stood at the mound hidden in the quiet depths of the forest that loomed over the Azgeda camp, the Commander allowed herself a moment of peace, a moment to enjoy the feeling of the energy, of the power, that surged through the air and clung to her skin. 

 

Turning to face her warriors, who had already shifted, she stood bare, in nothing but her red cloak. She looked out on them, wolves and humans alike. As she looked out onto the forms of the various peoples, from various homelands, and of various mother tongues, she saw one commonality between them all; she saw people who were willing to fight and die to defend against ternary, a common enemy, and to protect what they hold most dear. Looking out onto the sea of people, she saw the faces of those loyal to her, those who loved her, and those who loved her mate.

 

She made eye contact with each and every one of them as she prepared to speak, to rally their spirits for the fight. Settling on a small mixed group on the front lines she found Indra, Gustus, and Lincoln in wolf form along with a small band of humans - Octavia leaning slightly into Lincoln’s side, Raven and Monty holding small contains that Raven assures her will win them the fight, Bellomy and Kane stand with the Arkadian’s just behind them, weapons trained on the ground, determination written on their features. Abby and Nyko stood to the back of the army, by the rover, setting up tents and medical supplies for the people who will inevitably be injured.  

 

She looked at the all, standing sure and sturdy, as they await the command to fight. “For too long Nia of Azgeda has been allowed free to inflict her will on the people, too long has she been able to instil fear in the hearts of those that dare oppose her. But today that ends. Today we will make sure that those we love can live free from the threat of Nia and her bloody rule. Today, stedaunon kom au goch klin!” *THE DEAD WILL BE AVENGED!*

 

Courses of “yeah's”, howls and the chanting of “Jus drein jus daun” from wolves and humans alike erupted into the sky, so much was the promise of their wrath and velocity that they split the cosmos, making the last of the late night stars fall to their feet as the charge for their future commenced, with the mighty Heda shifting and leading her force out of the woods with the snarling roar of a thousand thunderstorms striking at once. 

 

//

 

She may not have her wolf hearing, but Anya knew that growl, that was the war cry of Heda. A smile of satisfaction pulled on her lips, despite their current circumstance Nia was going to get what was coming to her. Her smile faded as quickly as it had appeared when her mind and gaze fell back to Clarke. The poor sweet, intelligent and beautiful Alpha, that had stolen her friend and family's heart, and was the final piece of her soul.

 

She did not deserve what had happened to her, and Anya had no idea how her friend was even still functioning right now. She ponders if the represents Clarke was given has something to do with it, but her time to ponder is short lived when she hears loud blasts erupting outside the tent.

 

The shock waves and thunderous blast arose Roan from his exudation and blood loss induced slumber. He jars awake, wincing when the sudden jerking movement pulls his wounds. Grimacing through the pain he speaks, “What the hell was that?”

 

“I don’t know. But Lexa’s here, I can only imagine it was something the Arkers came up with.” 

 

Before Anya had even finished her sentence another large blast went off, this time closer to the tent they were being held in. The explosion illuminated the structures and shadows through the side of the tent, allowing them a brief inkling of what was happening outside. The shock wave caused their tent to sway and debris to come cascading down upon it. 

 

“Jok! What are they trying to do? Rescue us or kill us?” *Fuck*

 

“Fyucha.” *Baby* Anya glares at the Prince, “Don’t pull your wounds further, there’s no point in Lexa coming to get up if we die before she can save us.”

 

Roan just grumbles as another explosion ricochets through the relative quiet of the morning. However, that’s no longer the only noise present in their surroundings. They can hear wolves growling and snarling, the sound of claws and teeth ripping and tearing through flesh. The sound of automatic rifles also filled the air, consistent and never ending. 

 

There was movement at the tent entrance, both Anya and Roan tensed in case it was one of Nia’s guards if not Nia herself coming to finish them off as a final blow to shatter Lexa and her force. But to their deepest relief, it wasn’t Nia, nor one of her sentries that came through the opening in the tent, but rather Lexa herself. 

 

Both Roan and Anya allowed their tightly coiled bodies to release some of their spring loaded tension, but not allowing themselves to relax fully, they still had to get out of the battlefield alive. Lexa also seemed to relax minutely when she saw her friend and trusted advisor safe and well, bar a couple of wounds to her head, and dirt that coated her entire form. Seeing that Roan was still alive made her heart a little less heavy, she would need him moving forward and he wasn’t a bad man, despite his familial ties. But her heart heaved a thousand fold when she saw an unmoving curled form off to the left of her friends. 

 

Lexa stood there immobile, suspended in time as she looked at the curled back of the woman she loved, her mate. As she took in some the damage that Nia had inflicted, her usual sun blond curls were matted in blood and mud, stained a dark red and clumped in places. Her visible skin was cut and bruised. Her form was thinner than when Lexa had last seen her also; another lingering effect of Nia’s torture. 

 

The sight made Lexa sick. She could only imagine the damage she’d see when she looked upon Clarke’s face and the front of her body, sure that was where Nia had concentrated the majority of her sadistic efforts.  

 

A lump formed in Lexa’s throat as she waited. Waited for Clarke to move, for her chest to rise, for the sound of her shuttered and shallow breaths, anything that would tell Lexa that her gut was right, that Clarke was still alive. Because despite the image before her, and lack of vital signs, Lexa still refused to believe that she was actually dead. 

 

Lexa knew that she had to free her friends and get them out of her, but she couldn’t tear her gaze from Clarke, afraid that if she did, then she’d miss something, anything, that would prove her not a fool for believing against belief that her love was still alive. 

 

Somehow, her feet moved towards her chained friends, her hands working to free them without her actively doing anything, her eyes darting back to Clarke every other second, waiting, watching, hoping. 

 

When both Roan and Anya were free from their chains Lexa moved to Clarke. Hesitant and tentatively, she rounded so that they’d be face to face. The sight the meet her broke her heart. She had prepared herself for what Nia would have done to Clarke because she was hers and she wanted information on Lexa and to hurt her, but even her most wild and vivid thoughts of what Nia would have done to Clarke hadn’t sufficiently prepared her for the sight that meets her.

 

The mighty Commander fell to her knees before the blonde, eyes stinging as tears pricked at their edges. Her head went forward, instinctively cupping Clarke’s face with the gentle tenderness and familiarity only a lover would have. “Ai laik moba ai hodnes. I didn't mean for this to happen. I should have kept you safe, em’s ma dula kep in yu klir.” *I am sorry my love. It’s my job to keep you safe.*

 

Her heart breaks as her tears fall free and her voice wavers. Unable and unwilling to continue to see the destruction Nia has caused, she closes her eyes and presses her forehead to Clarke’s. As her tears fall free down her cheeks, slipping onto Clarke’s she moves to ghost her lips over hers. She hovers there a moment, gaining what is left of her strength to say one final goodbye to her love in a broken whisper, “Yu gonplei ste odon.” her voice breaks and wobbles, her intake of breath wet and shaky. Her voice is less than a whisper when she continues, “May we meet again.” On the last syllable, she presses her lips to Clarke’s with the utmost tenderness, as though she were stealing a kiss from the slumbering beauty, unable to wait for her to awake, but unable to deny the urge to kiss the golden haired angel.

 

Lexa dares not open her eyes as she moves her face way, she knows that she’ll have to face the reality of what’s happened but she can’t yet. She feels unworthy of the love Clarke bestowed on her and made her feel in return, she couldn’t even feel that her mate was dead - let alone the fact that they were true mates. Lexa felt like a failure, as though she’s failed Clarke, that she didn’t love Clarke enough, didn’t protect her as she should have, and this was her punishment.

 

The tent and the world surrounding them had been silent to Lexa’s ears, it was only her and Clarke existing in that moment, that was, until the deathly chill and cruelty that Nia’s laughter brought bombarded her sensories, bringing her crashing back into reality.

 

Lexa’s eyes shot open and her gaze locked with Nia’s. She was barely aware that Anya and Roan were surrounded by guards and would be of no assistance to her, her focus solely on the form that stood looming over her crumpled form, sword aimed for her throat.

 

“Pathetic.” Nia throws, voice laced with venom and malice “You are weak. Your emotion rules you  _ Alexandra kom Trikru, _ and that is why you were never fit to be the leader of our people.” She accentuates Lexa’s full name and familial clan, throwing them as insults and slurs, trying to get a rise out of her. “Your emotions caused you to turn and mate the sky princess - you dilute and poison the bloodline and disgrace your kin!” 

 

It is now that Lexa’s anger flares. How dare she talk about Clarke that way, how dare she insinuate that Clarke is not good enough to be a wolf. “Clarke is more of a wolf than you Nia.” Lexa bites back. “She’s stronger than you could ever hope to be.”

 

Nia’s sick smile returns to her lips, “I think you mean was dear Commander.” her smile grows the more she speaks, her cold dead eyes coming to life the more Lexa’s appear to die as her heart breaks further, “Your mutt is dead, and it’s all your fault.” She lets out a loud booming laugh, “Not to worry Alexandra-” her eyes turn to steal and ice, “you’ll be joining her soon enough.” Nia turns towards her son and Anya, “But not before I take everything and everyone you ever loved.” Turning back to Lexa her eyes are gleeful, “And you’ll die with the knowledge that it was all your fault. Their deaths, the fall of your precious coalition, all of it, because, You. Were. Weak.” She punctuates the last few words.

 

Lexa sees red, she can’t let Nia harm anyone else she loves, she can’t let anyone else die for her mistakes. Her wolf takes over and she shifts lunging for Nia’s neck. Her eyes widen, caught off guard she raises the sword in her hand but it hits the ground with a clang as Lexa’s paw swipes it away. Lexa’s distraction allows Anya and Roan to get free and fend off their captors. It’s four against two. But even wounded the odds are in Anya and Roan’s favour.

 

As they fight the guards, trying to gain the upper hand, Nia also shifts. It’s going to be a battle to the death. Lexa stands tall and proud, hackles raised and ears placed flat against her head, she snarls and growls at the smaller grey wolf. Her body is placed instinctively in a protective position in front of Clarke.

 

Nia snaps and snarls at the larger deep brown wolf, hackles raised in a similar manner as she tries to make herself seem intimidating, ears plastered to her head same as Lexa’s. Both wolves in a ready stance, waiting for the other to pounce. Nia tries to win the fight before it even begins. She tries to use her power of influence on Lexa, but Lexa is a much stronger Alpha than she and shrugs the attempt off as she lunges forward, sharp teeth going for Nia’s throat intent on ripping it out.

 

But Nia’s quicker than she appears, she manages to evade Lexa’s snapping jaw, only to retaliate with a swipe of her paw that lands clean across Lexa’s face, drawing blood from the Alpha as sharp talons slice and tear through flesh and fur. Her wolf howls in pain and anger and she lashes out, rounding on Nia and nipping her hind leg, making the woman shot out a high-pitched whimper of pain. 

 

When she managed to finally kick Lexa free of her leg she limped on the other three and blood oozed out of the puncture wounds her teeth left in their wake. The two circled each other, neither advancing except for quick attempts at contact, with swift retreating movements when their attempts failed; neither willing to lose their edge over the other.

 

A howle from the corner of the destroyed tent causes Lexa’s concentration to falter and Nia takes her advantage, knocking the Alpha from her feet and onto her back and shape teeth snap at her throat, Lexa doing all she can to keep it out of her iron jaw. The clashing of a strong wolf body on top of her own sends waves of pain radiating through her body. Nia’s claws dig into her chest and sides as she scrambles for Lexa’s throat; tearing her open in her haste to kill the Alpha. Lexa tried to roll onto her side, to find and advantage but Nia has her pinned, she tries to kick out but her legs are rendered fairly useless in this position. 

 

She looks around her and sees Anya and Roan losing in their fight with the guards. Having only taken out one, the other three wolves advanced on the two, Roan on the ground, panting and bleeding from his torn wound and Anya growling and snarling standing protectively over him, trying not to collapse herself; if she was going to die it wouldn’t be without a fight. Nia was still snapping at her neck as she surveyed the scene. Her mind went to the pack bound, she saw the battle through her people's, friends, and families eyes. They were gaining ground, but they wouldn’t make it here on time to help herself or Anya and Roan.

 

The battle was becoming bloodied, both wolves and humans lay scattered across the hillside dead. Bodies either burned and pulled apart from the booms that Raven and Monty had launched to give them the upper hand at the fights incision. Others had their throats ripped from their bodies, and the others either shot or sliced by the non-wolves.

 

Though the eyes of her people Lexa saw the fight, she saw people she knew dying. She saw her brother and Indra working as a well-oiled machine, working in sync to quickly dispatched anyone who wandered into their path. They danced the dance of death with beauty and grace, never missing a beat or stumbling as the tempo changed. She saw Lincoln and Octavia fighting back to back, a wolf and a warrior with a mighty blade; fighting for what they have, and what is to come. She saw Bellamy and Kane, making their way through the chaos, somehow knowing what wolves were on their side and which were not. She saw them save numerous members of her pack, she saw them be brave and loyal to the new start her and Clarke were trying to create.

 

A wolf lured Lincoln away, calling on his more primitive and wolf side to continue the fight, leaving Octavia’s flank unguarded. She could handle herself from both angles, it was no problem, just a more intense workout. But she was so focused on the sudden influx of people she had to fend off that she became complacent in observing her greater surroundings.

 

Unbeknownst to her, an archer was positioned high in the canopy of the forest behind them, and his sites were set on her. Bellomy had worked his way towards Octavia with Kane, trying to dispatch as many of the enemy's force on their way over. He saw the glint of the arrow head sparkle and shine in the sun. Looking through the scope of his rifle he was able to make out the archers bow, following the line of sight he saw it was trained on his sister. 

 

Moving his sites back to the archer's position he told Kane to cover him as he lined up the shot, but it wasn’t enough. When his bullet struck the man he released the tension in his bow, sending the arrow soaring towards its target. 

 

“OCTAVIA!” Bellamy screamed while lunging for his sister. He engulfed her in a cocoon, protecting her from the world; like he promised he always would. The two rolled onto the ground, Bellamy's grip never relenting from around his sister's form till they stop. The battle still raging around them. Bellamy’s grip loosened as his sister struggled to get free and take in what happened. 

 

“Bellamy what the-” her confusion was replaced with concern when she saw his shirt rapidly staining red and an arrow protruding from his chest. When she looked down she saw it had also cut into her chest as well; pushing all the way through his body as the rolled to cover.

 

“Bellamy…” her eyes grew wide and wet and she survived the scene in front of her. “KANE!” she called drawing the man to them, his face falling when he see the man he’d taken under his wing and now thought of a son. Octavia was visibly calm, but her eyes were frantic and her voice wasn’t faring much better, “We, we have to get him to Abby now.”

 

Kane moved to kneel beside them, wolves had come and surrounded the three humans, making sure that they were safe. “Octavia,” he said gently “It’s… it’s too late.”

 

“No. NO. Kane, we just have to get him to Abby and she’ll fix him, she’ll make him better.”

 

“Octavia-”

 

“NO! I’m not losing my brother.”

 

It was now that Bellamy spoke up, causing him to cough blood in the process, “O.” he croaked out.

 

“Bell.. Hey, hey big brother.” 

 

“O-”

 

“Shhh, you’re going to be fine Bell. You hear me?” He gave her a weak nod, not wanting to anger her. “We just gotta get you to Abby, she’ll know what to do.”

 

When Octavia made to move Bellamy’s grabbed her wrist, pulling her eyes back to him. Frantic and wild as they were. Blood was dripping from his mouth and his shirt was completely soaked through. “O, list-” he coughs a little, but it’s like a train wreck and Octavia can’t pull her eyes away. “Listen to me. Abby, Abby can’t help me.” 

 

“You don’t-”

 

“I do,” he says softly, closing his eyes. When he opens them again they are clear and sad. “You are so strong Octavia.” he chuckles a little, “I knew from the moment I first saw you that you were a fighter, that you were strong.” he pauses “and I knew that I’d do anything to protect you.”

 

“Bell,” her facade crumbles as her heart breaks for her brother, “Don’t leave me.” 

 

A sad smile graces his worn features, “I never will O.” A bloodied hand grabs hers and rests them above his heart, “I’ll always be watching over you, protecting you.”

 

Her face contorts with the pain of what he’s saying, “I love you, big brother. I’m sorry I never said it before-”

 

“I know O. I love you too.” He looks to where Kane and Lincoln are crouched just behind Octavia, “Don’t you hurt her.” he says pointedly to Lincoln, “Because she’ll kill you if you do.” 

 

A small nod is all Bellamy receives in return, but it’s enough. He turns to Kane, “Tell Raven I’m sorry, tell her…” a fit of coughs rack his body and when he speaks again it is weaker and gruffer, “Just tell her.” 

 

“I will,” Kane speaks softly, clasping his arm. 

 

Bellamy closes his eyes, “Tell Clarke she’ll be fine, Lexa will help her… Tell her not to shut her out.” 

 

“Bell what do you-”

 

“Just tell her, she’ll know.” he says, his voice becoming softer before his body gives in.

 

“Bell?” Octavia shakes him, “Bellamy? NO, no, no, no.”

 

“Octavia he’s gone.” 

 

“No, no he, he can’t be. He promised, he promised!” she squeaks turning to Kane who wraps his arms around her, trying to console the heartbroken woman.

 

The wolves surrounding them let out a mighty cry into the sky. Honouring their fallen comrade. Lexa’s mind shifts back to her own, she see’s Anya on her stomach about to be killed, blood staining her black fur, Nia above her still trying to get at her jugular. Lexa’s ready, she knows she cannot win this fight, and she can’t stand to see anyone else die. Though the pack bond Lexa says her final words with regret, “Ai gonplei ste odon.” 

 

Lexa closes her eyes, mind flying to thoughts of her mother and father from when she was a yongon, to her brother - how he protected and loved her all this time -, to Anya - her mentor and friend, Indra - the mother and steadying hand she’d gone long without -, to her people and all she’d done for them and them for her; finally her thoughts landed on the blonde that fell from the sky and changed her world. From the first moment Lexa saw her she’d been a goner, her world had suddenly burst into colour and sound, as though before that moment she’d been both blind and deaf and just never knew. Her thoughts filled with the blonde's smile, her laughter, how she commit herself to learning Trigedasleng and the ways of Lexa’s culture, the way she swooned - her pupils growing, breath quickening, skin becoming flush - when Lexa said her name in her special way. Her mind fills with thoughts of love as she prepares for the fatal blow to land and end her life. 

 

But it never does. Lexa never feels the sharp eager teeth puncture the soft flesh, never feels the panic as blood begins to fill her oesophagus and she begins to drown in it, she never feels the pull of her final sleep that’d take her away from this world. The weight on her chest is lifted, slowly she opens her eyes. She was unable to focus on anything at first, the edges of her vision impaired by darkness from the injuries she’d sustained. She thought that perhaps she was wrong, that she actually was dead and just didn't recall it happening. Because all at once her senses are overload. Clarke's scent clings to the wind, her heartbeat pulsing in Lexa's ears, and finally, Lexa sees her golden coated wolf form. She stands over Nia’s crumpled form, her muzzle coated in blood. The gaping wound on Nia's neck spilling out crimson that soaks the earth. She gargles are she tries to breathe, blood filling her oesophagus. Nia shifts back, trying, in a futile effort, to knit back together her wounds. Lexa thought she heard her whisper “Help me.” The avenging angel matted with mud and blood stood unsteadily above the dying woman, at her words moving and ending the woman's life with a final gargled scream. 

 

The wolf turned and green eyes meet blue, now truly Lexa thought she was dead. Only, if she were dead she shouldn’t be in pain. She shifted into her human form - hoping that she'd have better luck with knitting her wounds togeather than Nia did. When she'd shifted she stood on unsteady legs, eyes never leaving Clarkes. Lexa moved over to her wolf, extending her hand, making sure Clarke knew that she wasn't a threat, her eyes wild. “Clarke.” She said, in a soft tone, not daring to believe, but at the same time never truly having believed she was dead. 

 

Clarke shifts forms, eyes fluttering before she falls to the ground, Lexa just manages to catch her before she hits the ground. Lexa's voice is thick with emotion when she speaks, “You saved me again hodnes.” a weak smile is Clarke’s only reply, “Please don’t leave me, Clarke, I, I couldn’t survive losing you.” 

 

“Shhh, you…” her eyes roll to the back of her head, unfocused “you are stronger than my death Lexa.” before Lexa gets a chance to argue Clarke continues “You, you’ll survive me, you have to. I didn’t beat Nia’s poisoning to save you only for you to die.” 

 

This pulls a small wet chuckle from the Commander, making Clarke sigh with a dopey smile on her lips and her unfocused eyes darting around the corners of Lexa’s face, trying to gain purchase on her beautiful image, “You’re stubborn like that.” Clarke gives a weak nod, “I need you to be stubborn now Clarke, I need you to fight. I can’t - I won’t - do this without you.” 

 

“I’m so tired Lexa.” Clarke's voice is barely a whisper and her body is becoming slack against Lexa solid form.

 

“I know, but you have to stay with me, Clarke.”

 

“I’ll always be with you, Lexa.”

 

“Clarke.”

 

“CLARKE!.” 

 

Lexa calling her name is the last thing Clarke hears before her mind and body given in to the pull of the abyss.


	15. The calm after the storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where it all ends folks! The final chapter. Thank you all so much for sticking with me through it all; my sporadic updates, bad writing, spelling and grammar issues, and for your endless love and support you've shown me and this fic. (322 days since I started this! How crazy is that?) I will (at some point) be writing a few one shots for this piece (if they're wanted) so that we can see what life holds for everyone after this is all said and done. I've tried to tie up all the main story arch, in the fic while still leaving some open enough to be explored further in the future.
> 
> Anyway, that's enough from me, enjoy the final chapter and, as always, let me know what ya'll think. ;)

When word spread that Nia had fallen, her troops surrendered without much of a fight. Lexa knew that it was because they never really wanted to follow her rule but only did it out of fear. She couldn’t punish them for following their leader, but she also couldn't care less about them at the moment. She’d been hauled up with Clarke in her tent for four days, curled around her keeping her warm in her wolf form, staying as close to her mate as possible. She hadn’t allowed anyone in since she’d brought Clarke back, except for Abby and Nyko to perform tests and hook Clarke up to an IV. Lexa had initially seen red when Abby tried to put the needle in Clarke’s arm, but it would keep Clarke hydrated and stop her from becoming malnourished during her slumber… and hopefully, help repair some of the damaged Nia had caused to her body. When they suggested moving her to Polis Lexa’s only response was to growl at them. 

 

She needed to control what was happening; she needed to protect her mate, her alpha wouldn’t allow her to let anyone make decisions when it came to her mate, even if they may have been in her best interests. Right now her wolf was telling her to stay curled around her, to keep her warm and surround her with her scent, calm and comforting. In all honesty, being wrapped around Clarke was as much for herself, as it was for Clarke’s benefit. She needed to keep her close; she’d lost her because of her recklessness and failure to anticipate the lengths that Nia would go to to make her fall. Even though she knew she’d never lost Clarke, just the mere thought had sent her spiralling, and now that she had her back she never wanted to be without the other Alpha ever again. 

 

It was late into the evening when Abby entered the tent, Lexa’s head snapped up at her entrance; ears splayed against her head,  face pulled into a snarl - teeth bared -, and eyes, as black as her blood - rimmed with a fluorescing green, the colour of grass after a summer thunderstorm rolls through; alight with new life. Abby’s demeanour is unfazed; she’s cool and collected, her only response to Lexa’s outburst is to raise her hands in front of her in the universal symbol of ‘I mean you no harm’ and a form of submission to the Alpha that claimed her daughter. 

 

“Lexa, if you’d be so kind.” She says gesturing to the corner of the tent where a changing screen is set up. When Lexa makes no attempt to move Abby sighs in exasperation, “I wish to discuss Clarke’s condition with you.” When this gets nothing but a sideways look from the brown wolf as if to say ‘Well go on.’ Abby rolls her eye; tone bemused with an undercurrent of annoyance at the woman's antics, “The key word being, 'discuss', Lexa. As in, I wish to converse with you about it.” 

 

The wolf huffs, shifting back right before her, Abby averts her eyes looking anywhere but at the crumpled naked form that encompasses her daughter. She hears shuffling, out of the corner of her eyes she sees blankets flying around. When she hears Lexa clear her throat, she sets her gaze back on the imposing leader. 

 

“Thank you.” Lexa inclines her head in response, not offering the woman anything more before her gaze once more becomes fixed on the sleeping blonde.

 

“She was poisoned.” Abby states, Lexa’s head snaps up, eyes alight with questions, but before she has a chance to voice them Abby continues, “It was blowfish venom. The blade Nia stabbed both Roan and Clarke with was laced in it, it affected Clarke more because of her already weakened state.” Abby purses her lips before continuing, still wrapping her head around how her next few words could be true, “She also had the Wolfsbane presence in her system, it stopped her being capable of communicating with you. Its presence enhanced the viruses affects on her body - making her appear dead. ” Abby still couldn’t believe that the grounders (well some of them) are werewolves and that her daughter is now one of them.

 

Lexa takes in it, blinking slowly, eyes flitting between Abby and Clarke. There’s a long silence between the two and Abby doesn’t think Lexa’s going to say anything. She turns to leave when Lexa’s harsh, gravelly voice filters to her ears - Abby suspects that it’s a side effect of not speaking to anyone for the better part of a week, well, unless growling anytime someone entered the tent counts as 'speaking'.

 

“But..." when her eyes meet Abby's her seems to die in her throat. She shakes her head before rephrasing what she was going to say, "What does that mean? For Clarke’s recovery?” she clarifies when the doctor's forehead crinkles. 

 

“I’ve discussed with Niko wolf physiology, and based on what he told me, the wolfsbane should have been entirely out of her system this morning, so now her body should be recovering and regaining her… enhanced strength…  she should wake within the next few days.”

 

Lexa lets out a sigh of relief. Though she’s physically had Clarke with her for the past week, mentally she’s been vacant. And the sooner she wakes up the sooner she can change and speed up her healing.

 

Abby's hand rests on the tents fold; her body turned away from the woman that's captured her daughter's heart, "Oh, and Lexa." She remains facing away from the woman, the words falling from her lips, "It was because of you," the woman tilts her head to the side, brown earnest eyes locking with enraptured green, "You're the reason she woke up, she couldn't let the love of her life - her soulmate - die." 

 

With nothing more, Abby slips out of the tent, leaving Lexa and Clarke alone, wrapped in the comfort of one another.

 

//

 

Lexa had fallen asleep at some point, after having changed and re-cocooned herself around Clarke's fragile form, but now wakes with a start. At first, she can’t figure out what brought her out of her slumber. She’d been trying her best not to sleep, to stay alert and to protect Clarke against anything and everything at all times, but staying awake and tense for so long takes its toll on the body - even an enhanced one.

 

It’s the early hours of the morning, early enough that the birds are still peacefully under the thrall of sedated sleep, and the rays of the sun have not yet begun reaching into the darkness to claim and replace the light of the stars. The world is at its utmost peaceful. So what had woken her?

 

It’s then that she feels movement against her and she sees that Clarke has torn out her IV and shifted forms. Though she remains asleep. Lexa observes that her breathing is shallow and rushed, eyelids creasing in confusion or concentration, high pitched whimpers emit from her throat and she looks as though she’s sweating.

 

Lexa recognises that her mate is in distress immediately and moves so that she’s surrounding her senses further, nudging Clarke’s snout with her own, licking her face in an attempting to wake the nightmare enthralled blonde. When that doesn’t work, she buries her face in the blonde's neck, just under her chin. 

 

Lexa whines, trying to get Clarke to hear here. She tries speaking to her through their bond, trying desperately to pull her from the thralls of her nightmare back to reality, or at least into a less fitful sleep. “Clarke. My love, you’re fine, you’re safe. I’m here with you.” Lexa’s hit with a wave of fear and panic through their bond. It’s like a well-placed punch to the gut, it leaves her breathless and gasping for air. 

 

Clarke whines and cries some more, thrashing violently in her attempts to evade her imaginary demons. “Clarke it’s ok, I’m right here -”

 

“NO!” Clarke screams, cutting off her attempts to calm the blonde’s racing pulse and mind. “Lexa you can’t be here! You have to go, go before she finds you. She’s going to kill you.” Lexa’s so shocked by the words that flood her mind that she stunned into silence as Clarke’s words crash into her, the worry and pain lacing every syllable. “It’s all a trap, leave me, I’ll be fine, just get out of here!” Clarke’s silent before an ear-shattering scream pierces both her mind and the still night air. Clarke’s pained mournful howl ripping through the stillness of the early morning. 

 

Lexa springs into action, “Clarke, I’m right here. Nothing going to happen to me, Nia’s dead, you killed her, you saved me.” her voice is pleading, she’d do anything to protect the blonde from the demons and ghosts that haunt her subconscious, “Please Clarke…” Her voice is a whined plead, but she doesn’t care, she needs to get through to Clarke. She moves her head so that she’s looking at her loves scrunched up eyes, “I need you, Clarke, I need you to come back to me.” When her words bring forth nothing but more pained whimpers she laces her voice with power, trying to force Clarke back. “Open your eyes, Clarke. Come back to me, Little Wolf. I need you.” Lexa’s heart breaks as she feels Clarke trying to fight her way past her night terrors but futures at the last moment. When she speaks next, her voice is a broken plea, “Please Clarke.”

 

Electric cerulean blue eyes fly open connecting with terrified forest green. Clarke’s pupil dilated, her gaze wild and primal, silver ring glowing light lighting against a starless night sky. The world seems to freeze around them; there is nothing in that moment but their eyes on one another. Taking in everything, and nothing all at once. Lexa’s eyes are flush with equal parts relief and concern, Clarke’s gaze mirrors her own - focused and alert, taking in every feature of the other woman, as though she can’t believe that she’s real, that she’s here, that she’s alive.

 

Both are in awe of the other. They remain unmoving, just staring at the other, praying like hell that this isn’t some dream. Lexa’s the first to break the silence that surrounds them, bring back the sounds of the world around them as her voice breaks the bubble of silence that engulfs them, “I thought I’d lost you.” her voice is thick with a myriad of emotions.

 

“As did I,” Clarke says slowly, still cautions that this may all just be a dream, and Lexa is about to be ripped from her at any moment. Lexa senses her unease and softens around her, making sure as much of her body is touching Clarke as possible. 

 

“I’m here my love. I am real, and I would never leave you.” 

 

Clarke doesn’t say anything, how can she? She relaxes her body into Lexa’s and burrows in deeper, drinking in her scent, refusing to fall asleep, afraid that if she did that she’d lose this, that her mind would trap her in her nightmares once more. So they both stay there, wrapped up in each other, neither one willing to let go of consciousness, revealing in the conscious presence of one another.

 

//

 

"Wakey wakey Princess!"

 

"Get your ass outta bed Griffin."

 

Clarke jumps at the sound of Raven's and Octavia's voice's, bright and present in her ears. A baritone growl rumbles and vibrates around her body, the owner - the large brown wolf of her mate - curls further around her body, tightening her protective hold when the bodies attached to the voice's come bursting through the tent's opening.

 

"Would you look at that O, still wrapped up in bed," Raven says, a mirthful glint in her eye.

 

"How these two ever get anything done is beyond me." Octavia counters, finishing Ravens thought.

 

Clarke huffs, "Well I did almost die."

 

Both Raven and Octavia laugh before Raven replies, "Now you're just making excuses Clarkey. Nothing, not even a little bout with near death, can stop you."

 

Clarke smiles. She can see her sister's concern written on their face, hidden within their words, and draped in the way they linger by the tent's entrance. Giving her space, as opposed to storming her as they usually would - though, she supposes that could also be in part to the giant wolf that encompasses her form and lets out intermittent growls. "No, I suppose you're right."

 

The smiles fade from the dark haired girl's faces becoming clouded with the full extent of their emotions, eyes misting with the fear of loss. When Octavia speaks her voice is a sullen whisper, "We thought we'd lost you, Clarke."

 

Clarke feels Lexa tighten around her, her fear of Octavia's words showing. She attempts to lighten the mood, a cocky smile on her lips, "You know me O, I'm harder to get rid of than that."

 

"Don't." Raven's voice is hard and strangled as it leaves her lips, "Don't make light of this Griffin." Her eyes lock with Clarke's, tears welling in her hardened eyes, "We almost lost you. You're our leader Clarke, our sister, our family. And we almost lost you."

 

"Hey," Clarke moves out of Lexa's embrace, thankful that she had at least a blanket to wrap herself in. She runs to the girls, huddled together in their sorrow in the dark of the tent. Raven breaks down as she embraces them both, encircling their shaking forms in her arms as they three crash onto the cold ground. "Hey, I'm right here, and I don't plan on going anywhere." She says soothing them, "I'm gonna be around for an extremely long time, being a pain in both of your asses." 

 

This excites a wet sobbed laugh from Raven, Octavia joining. When their tears stop flowing Clarke looks them in the eyes, "It's us three against the world, no matter what happens or who comes into our lives and hearts-" Clarke steals a glance over to Lexa, who's looking at her with pure unadulterated love, "it will always be us three, forever and always."

 

The three hug, huddled on the ground until Raven notices something curious, "Are you naked Griffin? Not even awake 24 hours and you're already getting it on with Commander hot stuff over there." 

 

Clarke can't help but laugh because really, only Raven would comment on such a thing. Both Raven and Octavia join in, Lexa huffing her indignation in the corner.

 

//

 

Raven and Octavia spend the majority of the day with Clarke in the confines of hers and Lexa's tent. After she'd thrown some clothing on, they'd told her about Bellamy. About how he'd died doing what he always tried to do - protect them. The three had cried together mourning the loss of a brother to Octavia and Clarke and love to Raven.

 

Lexa had slipped out to give the three some privacy, but she never strayed far, staying by the entrance, continually checking on Clarke through their bond. 

 

When the trio were all cried out, Raven and Octavia left her to rest. Octavia pulling her to the side before she took her leave, "Clarke, Bell, he... He wanted me to tell you something before he... he..."

 

Clarke's hand found purchase on Octavia's forearm, squeezing, offering her support and understanding. Octavia sighed, thankful for her sister's comfort. "He wanted you to know that you'll be fine, that Lexa... she'll help you. He wanted to make sure you wouldn't shut her out." Octavia paused, eyes welling with fresh tears at the thought of her brother's final moments in this world, "He said that you'd understand."

 

Clarke's own eyes were wet with tears begging to pull free and leave valleys down her checks; and for once, she let them go willingly. She nodded her head fiercely, understanding, and grateful to her brother. "I do, thank you O."

 

"Always." 

 

//

 

Raven had left, nodding to Lexa and Lincoln, she now understood and respected what Lexa and Clarke had, no longer feeling any animosity towards the Alpha; though she was still going to tease the pair mercilessly. 

 

When Octavia came out of the tent her eyes were red and puffy, Lexa could only suspect that Clarke would be in a similar state, she moved to go and comfort her mate, but was stopped by the rich timbre of Lincoln's voice shyly saying “Heda.” 

 

She turned and looked at the pair standing hand in hand, both looking anxious, “Yes Lincoln.” 

 

“We-” His voice cracked, pausing to clear his throat Lincoln tried again, this time his voice sure and confident, his eyes meeting Lexa’s “Octavia and I would like to become mates Heda, I would like to ask your permission to turn Octavia into one of us.” 

 

Lexa looks at the couple for a moment, despite everything that had been going on, she’d noticed the two growing closer and had expected the question to come sooner or later. She regarded them, seeing the love and affection oozing out of their every pore. 

 

“You know the risks?”

 

“Sha Heda, and we accept them.” It is Octavia who speaks up this time.

 

Lexa inclines her head, “Then I see no reason why you cannot turn her Lincoln; she is much like Clarke, I don’t doubt she’ll make a wonderful wolf and mate.”

 

Matching mega watt smiles stretched across their lips, “Mochof Heda.” 

 

The two share a kiss and stare wistfully into the other's eyes as Lexa slips back into her tent and to her love.

 

//

 

Clarke surprised gasps quickly transformed into moans of pure ecstasy that erupted into the quiet of the tent, Lexa's mouth leaving reddened sink in its wake, as she nipped and sucked at the pale of Clarke's neck. Clarke's breathing quicken as Lexa continued her movement south, sucking on her pulse point and the sensitive skin where her neck and shoulder joined. Clarke couldn't hold back a whimper of want as Lexa's teeth grazed and dug into her skin and one of her hands migrated from Clarke's hip up her body, finding purchase at her breast; pulling and teasing her sensitive nipple. Lexa's other hand curved around her body, gripping her ass and pulling Clarke's hips flush against her own. Clarke's hips jerked forward, trying to find friction, each time Lexa nipped or pinched her nipple in just the right way. 

 

Clarke almost lost it when Lexa's mouth found her other nipple taking it between her lips, sucking and teasing it, before releasing it with a loud pop, just as Clarke was beginning to get into a rhythm. Clarke growled at the loss of contact, her core on fire and pulsing with want and need. Lexa's answering chuckle sent a fresh wave of heat to her core, making a new flood of slick want coat Lexa's stomach where her core rested, trying to gain friction. 

 

With the evidence of arousal on Lexa's stomach, Clarke's cheeks reddened in embarrassment, but Lexa's eyes only grew darker, the green iris that filled Clarke's dreams became engulfed by enlarging pupils, the faint glow of green could just be seen skirting the black pools of desire.

 

The sight made Clarke bold, no longer embarrassed by her desire, Clarke ground her slick lips against Lexa's toned stomach while pulling the wild creature before her into a breathtaking kiss. The kiss wasn't soft or loving; it was the kind of bruising kiss driven by desire and pure animalist want. 

 

They both fought for dominance, neither giving an inch. Tongues fought in one another's mouths, tentative touches turning rough. Lexa moaned as Clarke swiped her tongue into her mouth and against the roof of her mouth. "Clarke" her name was but a growl on Lexa's lips, a warning, a prayer, a plea. 

 

"Lexa, please. I need you." Clarke said bucking against Lexa's core once more. 

 

Lexa moaned, hands moving under Clarke's ass, hoisting her flush against her heated body. Clarke's legs hooked around her hips as she held them both on her knees. Her fingers kneading at her ass, Clarke released a moan laced with lust, her lips trailing across Lexa's jaw, sucking at the point between her ear and jaw, causing the alpha to whine and thrust her hips up against her mate. 

 

Clarke's mouth began a descent similar to that of Lexa's on her own flesh, as Lexa manoeuvred them so that Clarke rested on her toned thigh. The contact sent a sigh of relief flooding through Clarke's body, and she began to grind against the newly offered flesh with vigour. Lexa moved her thigh to meet Clarke's thrusts, adding speed and force to the movement. 

 

Clarke had since abandoned her lips decent against Lexa's flesh, her head thrown back in pleasure as obscene moans escaped her lips. Lexa was in awe of the creature above her; she adjusted her hold on Clarke’s ass - manoeuvring one hand to the point where Clarke's ass and back meet, freeing her other hand to snake into the gap between their intertwined bodies. 

 

She cupped Clarke's dripping cunt, coating her fingers in arousal as she ran her fingers through Clarke's folds. Lexa's finger circled her inner labia, pointedly skipping over her clit, drawing a frustrated huff from the blonde. Before Clarke could comment on the lack of contact, however, Lexa was slowly sinking two slender fingers into her eager hot opening, drawing a whimpered moan from the blonde's lips as she threw her head back and her body towards Lexa, burying her fingers deeper in her cunt.

 

Lexa couldn't help but lose her breath at the sight of Clarke -her mate, her love, her soulmate - losing control, veering closer to the edge of the precipice of pleasure. She sucked in a breath, her nostrils filling with the scent of Clarke's pleasure before she began moving her fingers in and out of the blonde, using her thigh to aid her thrusts. Clarke's hips rolled, moving up and down to add further pressure to Lexa's thrusts. But it wasn't enough, Clarke needed more.

 

"Lexa, ah, please." Clarke's voice was a thick husk, her words coming out in a pant as she continued her gruelling pace on Lexa's fingers, trying to push herself over the edge. Her hands moving to her hair, fingers threading through it, pulling it into a pile atop her head.

 

Lexa flicked her thumb, gliding it over Clarke's hypersensitive clit, which long since enlarged and escaped its hood in her lust. Clarke's body shuttered a the touch, sending electricity shooting through her body. A staggered gasp moulding into a deep throated moan falling from her kiss swollen lips.  Lexa's mouth came up to swallow her strangled cry, replacing it with her own as she worked her wrist, pumping her fingers faster and harder into Clarke as she swiped erratic patterns on her clit. 

 

Clarke's breathing became shallow and rushed, Lexa wasn't even sure if the air was entering her lungs before it was expelled again. Lexa's gaze became transfixed on of the sharp rise and fall of her breasts, the pulsing of her pulse under her soft skin, and the utter beauty that was Clarke.

 

"Sen klir Klark, miya gon ai hodnes." *Let go Clarke, cum for me my love.*

 

Clarke came with a shrill hoarse scream. The sight and sounds before her captivated Lexa, the curve of Clarke's lips, the knit of her brow, the pitch of her body as she coiled in her orgasm to fall down, diving over the precipice, unafraid, headfirst into the passionate embrace of lust, desire, and pleasure. 

 

When Clarke's body stopped spasming the two rested their foreheads against one another's, breaths coming out in short rapid puffs of air, slowly slowing to a steadier beat. A smile spread over Clarke's lips, "That was one hell of a wake-up call."

 

The tips of Lexa's ears burned red as they flushed. Clarke giggled, kissing the tips of her ears, cooling the burning flesh, before taking her lips. Their kiss was soft and unrushed at first, both content to just stay connected to one another in their bubble, but soon taking on a feverous edge. Their lips increasing their pace, becoming rushed once again. Setting a bruising pace that neither of them cared to soften. 

 

Clarke was the one to break apart first, breath quick and harsh as it left her lips, "Let me take care of you." she panted, all Lexa could do was moan at the desire lacing Clarke's words. Helpless as Clarke laid her back against the bed, beginning her descent to her core to return the sweet torture she had inflicted not mere moments before.

 

Clarke worked her with her tongue and fingers, not bothering with the pretences of teasing, she could feel how worked up Lexa already was. Within moments Lexa was cumming, Clarke's name falling from her lips as her hips bucked up into her waiting embrace, happily lapping at her gushing flow of her arousal to bring her down from her high.

 

// 

 

Throughout the week the injured and dead had been shuttled back to Polis using the rover. There was going to be a mass funeral for the fallen when Heda and Wanheda returned to the Capital, with this in mind and because Clarke was now awake, they couldn't delay leaving their bubble of bliss any longer.

 

Abby was accompanying the pair home, along with Octavia, Raven, Lincoln, Nyko, and her personal guard Alshi - Lexa had sent Anya back to the Capital along with Gustus and Indra to ensure that none of the Ambassadors used her absence to gain power over the grief struck people. They had been reluctant to leave her and her mates side, after everything they'd been through, but understood the importance of having the Commander's council in Polis, preparing for the mourning and celebration of the dead.

 

Abby used the guise of monitoring Clarke's condition to accompany them back in the rover, but she'd just wanted to spend time with her daughter. She'd almost lost her baby, and their last words and actions had been done in anger, sadness, hurt, and regret; she'd never forgive herself if she didn't take the chance that had been granted her to make things right, to try.

 

Octavia and Lincoln sat up front, Octavia driving and Lincoln sitting securely and sturdy by her side, offering silent comfort and support to her. He'd not know her brother well, but, what he had known, was that he'd d been a good man, for the most part, and loved his sister with all his heart - that she was the most important thing in the world to him. That was something the two could agree on. 

 

Lincoln smiled to himself, thinking back to when Bellamy had first come to Polis when this mess had all started and saw the two together.  _ *They'd been training, it was the only way to get Octavia's mind from her worry, to stop her pacing. She had to feel as though she was doing something productive to getting Clarke back, and though right now, training and honing her skills would not immediately bring her sister home, when it came time to fight, these skills would be the difference between her coming home alive or not.  _

 

_ They'd just finished another set, Octavia knocking Lincoln's sword from his grasp and holding her own to his throat, daring him to try and contest her victory. He inclined his head meekly, conceding. When she'd lowered her sword, he took her in his arms, kissing her forehead, soothingly stroking her hair. "We're going to find her; it's going to be okay. Ste yuj Hodnes" *Stay strong love* _

 

_ Octavia nuzzled further into his impenetrable embrace, taking solace in his words, in the conviction behind them, the belief in them. "Octavia." A stern and blustering voice broke the peaceful silence that enveloped over them, protecting them from the world, for just a moment. _

 

_ Octavia detangled herself from Lincoln, recognising the voice as that of her brother, she could hear an edge to it, sighing she turned to him. "Hello, Bell."  _

 

_ He didn't acknowledge her greeting, rather lunging straight into his inquisition, nodding his head to indicate Lincoln he said, "Lincoln" His tone wasn't adversely hostile, but it definitely wasn't friendly, there was a graining edge to his words that made her prickle involuntarily. She was about to tell him it was none of his business and where he could shove his concern when Lincoln spoke up. _

 

_ He side stepped her, extending his arm to the brooding man on the edge of the training circle, "How have things been in Arkadia? I hear the new system of government is working well under your leadership." His voice was calm, a faint smile on his lips when the man took his arm in a firm grip, trying to assert his dominance.  _

 

_ He could see that appeased the man, his chest puffing, swelling in pride - had Lincoln not known better he would have thought Bellamy, an Alpha wolf with his behaviour. _

 

_ Bellamy's amber eyes flicked briefly to Octavia, the siblings getting in a staring match before Octavia's resigned sigh echoes behind Lincoln. She places a hand on his back, coming up next to him she stands on her tippy toes, kissing his cheek, then whispering, "Go easy on him." before saying more loudly so that both would hear as she pulled away, "I'm gonna go check on Raven." She sends a glare back over to her brother before mouthing 'behave' at him. _

 

_ Once she'd gone Bellamy's attention returns to the towering grounder before him, Lincoln was all lean muscles, dark chocolate skin and intricate tattoo's. His muscular frame towered over Bellamy's, but Bellamy didn't back down, and for this Lincoln respected him. _

 

_ "What is it you wish to say to me, Bellamy?" he cocked an eyebrow, they both knew that the topic of discussion would be Octavia, what was unknown was how it was going to transpire, and how, the two would interact thereafter.  _

 

_ Bellamy sized him up, Lincoln thought he was going to fight him on his being with Octavia, so the words that left his mouth left the warrior dumbstruck, "You're good for her Lincoln, you make her see her strength." _

 

_ Lincoln didn't have the words; he hadn't expected this reaction for Bellamy based on what Octavia had told him of his protectiveness and the death glares he'd received when at Arkadia. He stood there unmoving, not wanting to risk that it was all a trick of the mind. "I... I, thank-" _

 

_ Before he could form a coherent response, Bellamy spoke again, seemingly having found himself once more, the moment over, "But if you ever dare hurt her, you'll be in for a world of pain." _

 

_ Lincoln smiled, this is what he'd expected, what he'd prepared for, "I would never knowingly hurt your sister Bellamy." His words were earnest, and Bellamy could hear the sincerity in them, the truth of it was also evident in Lincoln's' eyes. _

 

_ Bellamy nodded, "Good because it isn't just me who'd kick your ass" he pauses muttering under his breath "or at least try to" making Lincoln smile before he continued in an elevated tone meant for conversation, "Clarke, Raven, and then there's Octavia herself. You've unleashed a Titan; I just hope you know how to sate it." _

 

_ Lincoln’s smile was warm, "I'll take that under advisement." Bellamy nods turning to leave, their conversation seemingly concluded, his piece said and done. But Lincoln left him with lingering words that made him sure he'd never purposefully or knowingly do wrong by his sister, "She is a force of nature, and I understand and respect your need to protect her, she's special. The world is undeserving of her light, and I will do everything in my power to be worthy of it, but even then I fear I will fail. I love her with everything that I am, and I just pray that that's enough."  _

 

_ "As long as you make her happy it will be."* _

 

Lincoln intertwined his left hand with Octavia's right, giving it a gentle squeeze, reminding her as much as himself of the promise he'd made to Bellamy. Making a silent declaration with that touch, that he'd always do right by her, even more, so that her last blood family was gone, and he'd alway love and cherish her in any way she needed.

 

In the back of the rover, Clarke was seated nestled between Lexa and Raven, while her mother was sat adjacent to her, cushioned in between Nyko and Alshi. Clarke tried to avoid her mother's eyes, she knew she wanted to talk, but now, surrounded by her friends, mate and wolves was not the time. So Clarke spent her time pointedly avoiding her mother's gaze, her eyes staying fixed on her lap, on her hands, like they were the most interesting things in the world. Suddenly there was an addition to the most exciting thing in the world, a slender tanned hand with long, intricate fingers slid between hers, fingers entangling. 

 

Clarke's gaze snapped up to meet Lexa's; her eyes were a boring green, alight with concern and comfort, which saw through her soul.  _ "Are you alright my love?" _ she asked through their bond,  _ "You're releasing stress pheromones, are you in pain? Should I _ -" 

 

_ "I'm fine Lexa." _ Lexa's face said that she didn't believe the blonde, Clarke untangled her right hand from its entrapment beneath hers and Lexa's entwined grasp, reaching out and cupping her love's face, moving to place a soft barely there kiss on her lips. When she pulled away Lexa's face had softened, her features over taken with love, "I'm fine my love, you have no need to worry." She said softly, breath brushing and heating Lexa's lips. 

 

They'd both forgotten the world and people around them, content in the little bubble that was each other's embrace. Their bubble was shattered with the clearing of a throat, both Alphas having to stifle a growl at the intrusion. Clarke's turning into an inward groan when she realised where it'd come from, she swallowed her pride and turned her gaze to her mother who was looking and her and Lexa expectantly. 

 

"What is it, mum?"

 

Abby had the decency to look embarrassed and flushed a bright crimson, however, before she could speak Raven was already jumping in to defuse the situation, "How much longer until we reach Polis Commander?" 

 

Clarke turned to Raven, eyes grateful as she squeezed her hand, Raven gives her a small nod, she always had her back. Lexa turned to look out the windscreen, "twenty minutes, thirty max." she pauses before stating in a teasing voice, "It depends on if Octavia can avoid putting us in a ditch... again." 

 

"Hey! That was one time, and it wasn't my fault." 

 

It was Raven who chimed in next, "Yeah, well I don't see anyone else around to blame for the snail's pace we're crawling at grandma!"

 

"Oh, you want speed Rayas, I'll give you speed." 

 

The next thing they knew they well all being jolted backwards as Octavia slammed her foot on the accelerated, increasing the g-force acting on their bodies. Once everyone recovered into an upright position the bickering continued, but Clarke was grateful, it almost felt like normal. Almost.

 

When her gaze fell back on her mother, she wore the 'this isn't over we'll be talking about this later' look. Great Clarke thought. She sighed and slumped into Lexa's solid form, seeking comfort in her mate’s touch and presence. There was nothing to be done until they were alone, so for now, she'd enjoy the simplicity of being held by her mate.

 

//

 

They'd pulled up just outside the gates of Polis; all wolves hurried to exit the rover, the stench of five wolves confined in such close quarters for so long finally beginning to affect them. They all breathed a sigh of relief as the fresh chill breeze flowed around them and filled their lungs with renewed life.

 

Lexa stayed by Clarke's side when the exited the rover, never getting enough of her mate's scent. Clarke felt the same, and the two clung to one another, while everyone else began to make their way towards the towering gates of the city. 

 

Clarke sighed, she didn't want to go back, not yet. She just wanted a reprieve from their duties; she just wanted a chance to be with her mate, after everything they'd been through, she just wanted to be.

 

But she knew that was not their fate; their destiny was to lead and guide their people, to keep them safe above all else.

 

Lexa sensed Clarke's souring mood, pulling the blonde's face into her hands she brought her eyes up to meet her own. "Clarke, we will always belong to our people, there is nothing to be done about this. It is who we are."

 

Clarke's sad eyes broke from Lexa's, moving to look at the ground,  but Lexa wasn't done, and she had to make sure Clarke heard this, heard her. 

 

"But," she says, hand tilting Clarke's eyes back onto hers "we are no longer going to be controlled by this. I almost lost you hodnes" Lexa's voice breaks, emotions raw and plainly etched into her god like features, eyes shining with unshed tears. "I'm not going to waste a moment of our time together; whether we have a day, a month, a year or a hundred together, it will never be enough."

 

Lexa get's down on her knees, hands slipping from Clarke's face to her hands, "Ai badan yu klin Klark kom Skaikru, na kom ai las wan raun breath en pas." *I swear fatality to you, Clarke of the sky people, until my last dying breath and beyond.*

 

Clarke's eyes welled with tears; the others had stopped around them, the grounders all looking on with found astonishment. Though it was now common knowledge that the pair were true mate - their souls the torn pieces of a star, bound for all time - it was another matter entirely for the mantle of Heda to get on her knees and pledge her mortal and immortal soul to another. 

 

"Ai hod yu in, Leksa, nau en feva." *I love you, Lexa, now and forever.* 

 

Though Octavia's Trigedasleng wasn't perfect, she understood most of what the pair had said, and even if she couldn't understand the words the meaning was clear in the pairs voices, actions and looks. 

 

Abby looked on, her heart swelling and threatening to burst at the sight. She knew not what they had said to one another, but the meaning was clear as day to her. They were in love; they were meant to be.

 

When Lexa got back to her feet, the couple buried themselves in each other's necks, basking in the unique smell of their mate that made them feel safe, at home.

 

It wasn't until they heard a commotion from inside the gates that the world came back into focus and they separated, prepared to face their people, their responsibilities, together.

 

Their friends had since left them and made their way inside, only Clarke, Lexa, and Abby remaining outside. Clarke knew that her mother was waiting for her, waiting to speak with her. She squeezed Lexa's hand, telling her to go on and that she'd catch up in a moment. Lexa, for her part, was reluctant to let go of Clarke, asking if she were sure. Clarke nodded all Alpha confidence, her eyes burning bright with determination.

 

Clarke made her way over to where her mother stood, far enough away from the gates as not to be heard, but close enough that they could make their way inside quickly if need be. 

 

"Mum." Clarke nodded.

 

"Clarke." 

 

Both stood, eyes locked on the other, neither willing to back down nor too sure of where to start.

 

"I-" they both state at the same instant, both chuckling at their entire circumstance. Clarke shakes her head.

 

"You go, first mum," Clarke says, her chuckle lacing her words in humour.

 

Abby's eyes soften, "I... I'm sorry Clarke."

 

Confusion etches its way onto the blonde's features, she's about to ask what for when her mother continues, "I'm sorry about how I reacted when we first came down to Earth, I'm sorry for how I treated you, how I treated Lexa." she pauses taking a shaky breath, "And I'm sorry I didn't do more, for you or Jake." 

 

At the mention of her father's name tears prickled at the corners of her eyes and fogged her vision. A choked sob of "mum" was all that came out. 

 

When their eyes meet, Abby's were just as watery as her daughters. 

 

Clarke took her mother into her arms, both revelling in the familiar embrace from when she was little. 

 

"It's okay mum, I, I forgive you."

 

"Don't say that Clarke, it's not okay, none of it is."

 

Clarke shook her head pulling away from her mother, "I did... I did terrible things mum, things that I can't- what I did to you." Clarke's gaze turned to that of a trapped animal, "I'm sorry mum, I'm so so sorry!"

 

"Shhh, It's alright Clarke. Shhhh you're okay honey. It was for the good of our people Clarke, to give them a chance here on the ground. I do not fault you for that."

 

"For the good of our people," Clarke mutters "how much can that excuse? We do unspeakable things and claim it's for the good of our people." Clarke's eyes looked far off before snapping back into focus and muttering, "I bet that's what Nia thought too." 

 

Abby growled taking Clarke's face in her grasp, "You are not Nia Clarke. You do not seek to injure and hurt; you want to help and heal, you are good. You and Nia are nothing alike. She inflicted pain; you take it away." 

 

Clarke took comfort in her mother's words, but she knew it would take time and the support and love of her family to fully get past it. 

 

"Lexa loves you so much." Abby all but blurts out, and Clarke can't help the wet laugh that escapes her lips.

 

"Yeah, and I her."

 

Abby gives Clarke a knowing look, "I'd expect nothing less of true mates."

 

For a moment Clarke is struck dumb. Did she just... Does she know... What? Apparently, she'd said this - or rambled it as the case may be - out loud if Abby's responding laugh was any indication.

 

"Nyko showed me." her eyes took on a teasing glint and her words were dribbling mirth "Then Lexa and I had a rather frank conversation." 

 

Clarke's face went red, the thought of her mother and Lexa talking about being mates sent heat straight to her cheeks. 

 

Abby took pity on her daughter wrapping her in a tight embrace that the blonde seemed to melt into just as much as she did, "I am truly happy for you Clarke, and I will forever be sorry that I let my pride and fear dictate my actions when I first meet Lexa."

 

She had taken a deep breath before she spoke in a quiet, wistful voice, "Jake would have loved her know, if for nothing more than making you happy. And he'd be so proud of the young woman you've become Clarke." 

 

Fresh tears pooled in Clarke's eyes hearing her mother's confession. "Thank you, mum. I hope Kane continues to make you happy. I love you."

 

"I love you too Clarke."

 

//

 

Lexa stood where Clarke had left her, rooted to the earth, watching on. She startled when a hand clamped down on her shoulder, but relaxed a moment later recognising her brother's scent. 

 

The siblings stood in a comfortable silence, both watching on as mother and daughter talked, looking awkward and unsure of the other at first, tears filling both women's eyes as time went by and words were spoken. Lexa stayed where she was though; they were good tears, healing tears. The pair shared an embrace that, by the looks of it, had been long needed by both. A smile crept on Lexa's lips as she felt her mates joy, her happiness bubbling to her through their bond. The sight of the blondes happiness could not be rivalled; not by her first sunrise nor first sunset. The earth catching fire was a brilliant and wondrous sight - once her favourite. But now, now it paled in comparison to the smile that graced Clarke's lips, the way her eyes sparkled and were alight in her joy, the way her head dipped to the side slightly as her smile grew into the most wondrous teeth baring grin.

 

Anya had since also joined the siblings in their silent appreciation of the blonde Alpha from the sky. Anya is the first to break the peaceful silence, "Heda it is time." 

 

"I'm waiting for Clarke." 

 

Anya nods, but speaks again never the less, "She can meet you inside, you people wish to see you."

 

"Not without Clarke. I... Not without Clarke."

 

Both Gustus and Anya nodded in understanding after everything that Clarke and Lexa had been through it was only natural that Lexa would want her mate in her line of sight at all times. The mood sombred with the silent confession, Gustus cracked a small smile, trying to lighten the mood, "Careful Lexi, else she'll get sick of you." 

 

Anya joined in, "She'll be begging me to distract you so that she can wander the streets in peace." 

 

Lexa gave a small chuckle; their teasing had had its intended effect. Though Lexa knew what they said to be a genuine possibility, her love was very independent, but until Clarke herself sent her away Lexa would stay close to her.

 

Clarke and her mother came over to them, both wearing wide smiles, Clarke's hand slipped into Lexa's, as the began walking into the city of Polis. Anya, Gustus and Abby were walking a few steps ahead of them. Lexa stopped them at the gate for a moment, taking their joined hands and bringing them to her lips. 

 

"Are you ready my love?"

 

"As long as I have you." 

 

"Always."


End file.
